Haverford College - Record Yearbook (Haverford, PA)

Text from Pages 1 - 166 of the 1911 volume:

y ' JEf SrrnrJi iif thf iHaurrfiirii (EoUryr irytrmbrr lUHr Jlimr 1911 BIUOLE PRESS 1911 i.i THE CLASS IFayrr C ? imnurr (Sinitlr ifnlk Sn this iUimkr uir praji unit rraii tbf ffiiBlorir nf tlir (tlass nf iX ' inrtrcu tlriini, a (Tiimirall anil arayirall IDnrlt rinitajnuny tbr Mucrsp liumnurs nf uur rlinlrrs. VOe praji jimtr mrrrtj. sluntli) uir baitr aal r a tmmttj ' rtaiiist i|Dur S ' mirn nr iimtr iFrirniis. -lif uir Ikuic traitfliirrBori in maimrrB. uir rralir pariimi for the ICour IBP brar mir umrlliir Alma Iflatrr iBaorrfiuii. ' 4 itiUi4 (JvS f ' ' ' ' ' ' — • TO DOCTOR FRANCIS BARTON GUMMERE MAN SCHOLAR GENTLEMAN These, with the Viking Spirit, this book is dedicated. (Elass Bax i Proud amid her bending elm trees Stands our Alma Mater fair. ' Neath the moonlight ' s soft caresses And the winds that whisper there, We have felt the bond of friendship Which will ever draw us back. Till we thrill again with mem ' ries Of the Scarlet and the Black. When we first came here as Freshmen, In the verdant days of yore. We would listen to the tramplmg Of the Soph mores at the door. And the crash of upturned bedsteads As the midnight hour did pass. Brought us all the welcome knowledge. That we were a weighty class. But with Senior Year have deepened All the ties that hold us fast. To the fellows and the College And these days so quickly passed. Let us therefore, while we linger. For the future all agree. We ' ll remember Nineteen leven And the days that used to be. Chorus : So here ' s to old Nineteen leven, The class that we love so dear. And here ' s to our Alma Mater Come give her a rousmg cheer. Tho ' scattered in future years, lads. Whatever may come to pass, We ' ll ever be true and loyal, And honor our glorious class. -J. S. B. James Ashbrook, Philadelphia, Pa. Born, Philadelphia, Pa., .March 9, 1888. Entered Class Freshman year from Central High, Philadelphia. Track team (1, 2, :S); Relay team (2, 3); Class Treasurer (1); Vice-President Y. M. C. A. (3); Vice-President Scientific Society (3); President (4); Vice-Chairman Foot- ball Department (3); Chaimian (4); CLASS RECORD Art Editor (4); Cap and Bells Club (4). Daniel Burchard Boyer, Boyertown, Pa. Born, Boyertown, Pa., October 2, 1889. Prepared for colleee at Hill School. Entered Sophomore year from Yale. Clas.s gymnasium team (2, 3) ; Captain (3) ; Class Round-up team (3, 4) ; Glee Club (3); Operetta (3, 4); Preston Committee {3, 4); A.ssociate Manager of Class Recoru (4); Cap and Bells Club (4). John Saeger Bradway, Born, Swarthmore, Pa., 1890. Entered from Haverford School. Mandolin Club (1, 2. 3) ; Class Treasurer (3) ; Foot-ball Squad (3, 4) ; Third Soccer Soccer Team (4) ; Mu sic Study Club (4). Haveiford, Pa. Glee Club (2, 3); Team (4) ; Class Daniel Lindsley Birdsall, Born, May 21, 1886. Entered from Oakwood Seminary. Bristol, Vt. Left middle of Junior year. Missanabie, Ontario, Canada Ronald Christie, Bom, February 12, 1888. Entered from Upper Canada College. Left at end of Sophomore year. James Alexander Clarke. Jr., Devon, Pa. Born, Coatesville, Pa., November 17, 1891. Entered Class Freshman year from Central Manual Training School. Jefferson Hamer Clark, Jr., Philadelphia, Pa Born, Philadelphia, December 10, 1890. Entered Class Freshman year from William Penn Charter School. Mando- lin Club (1, 2, 3) ; Class Cricket Team (1, 2, 3) ; Class Track Team (2 . i) ; Second Cricket Team (3); Round-Up (3, 4). William Buchanan Cloud, Unionville, Pa. Born, Marlboro, Pa., January 4, 1890. Entered from West Chester High School. Left at end of Sophomore year. 10 Philip Bernard Deane, Middleboro. Mass. Born, Middleboro, Mass., August 16, 1889. Entered Freshman Year from Middleboro High School, Mass. Class Foot- ball Team (1, 2) ; Class Basket Ball Team (1, 2, 4) ; Class Cricket Team (1. 2, 3, 4); Class Soccer Team (2, 3. 4); Foot-ball Squad (1, 2, 4); Class President (2); Secretary H. C. A. A. (2); Cane Man (2); Hazing Committee (2); Honor System Committee (1, 2); Foot-ball Numerals (2); Associate Foot-ball Manager (3); Secretary-Treasurer Scientific Society (3); Y. M. C. A. Treasurer (3); Y. M. C. A. Cabinet (3); Leader Delegation to Northfield Conference (3); Junior Play Committee (3) ; Advisory Board (3). John Steele Downing, Elsmere, Delaware Born, Wilmington, Del., December 4, 1888. Entered Freshman Year from Wcsttown Scho ol. Class Soccer Team (1, 2, 3, 4); Class Cricket Team (1, 2, 3, 4); Second Soccer Team (1); Soccer Team (2, 3, 4); Cricket Team (2, 3, 4); Second Cricket Team (1); Class ' 8.5 ball— 2nd XI Bowling .Average (1); Canadian Cricket Team (2); Engli.sh Team (3); Christian Febiger Ball, Intercollegiate Bowling Average (3); Class ' 98 Chem- istry Prize (3); Cricket Grounds Committee (4); Cricket H (3). 11 Christopher Fallon, Jr., Wayne, Pa. Born, Philadelphia, Pa., February 17, 1889. Entered Class Freshman year from William Penn Charter School. Left end of Sophomore year. Corporation Scholarship (1, 2). Benjamin Farquhar, Born, Wilmington, Ohio, July 25, 1890. Entered from Wilmington College, Ohio. Wilmington, Ohio 12 Henry Ferris, Jr., Gt-rmantown. Pa. Born, Wilmington, Del., May 19, 1888. Entered Freshman Year from Chestnut Hill Academy. Class Cricket Team II. 2, 3, 4) ; Class ' 85 Second XI Bat |2) ; Class Soccer Team (3, 4) ; Round Up (3); Oratorical Contest (1). Hexbert Van Biren Gallagher, Philadelphia, Pa. Born, New York City, October 7, 1887. Entered Class Freshman year from DeLancey School. Left end of Sopho- more year. Class foot-ball team (1, 2); Captain (1. 2); Class basket ball team (1, 2(; Class track team (1, 2); Cane man (1); Foot-ball squad (1, 2); Track team (1. 2) ; Class Vice-Pre-sident (2) ; Relay team (1). 13 William Henry Gardiner, Lancaster, Pa. Born, Germantown, Pa., May 5, 1890. Entered Class Freshman year from Yeates School, Lancaster, Pa. Left end of Junior year. Foot-ball squad (1) ; Class President (1) ; Advisory Board (3); Elected Manager Track Team (3). Thomas Frederic Hadley, Born, Northbranch, Kansas, January 1, 1887. Entered Senior Year from Friends ' University, Kansas. Scholarship (4). Northbranch, Kan. Senior Foundation 14 AVii.i.iAM Davis Hartshorne, Brighton, Mil. Born, Brighton, Md., August 1, 1889. Entered Freshman Year from Westtown School. Class Foot-ball Team (1, 2); Class Soccer Team (1, 2, 3, 4); Class Track Team (1, 2, 3, 4); Class Cricket Team (1, 2, 3, 4); Captain (1, 2, 3); Class Numerals for Foot-ball, Cricket, Soccer, Track; Second Soccer Team (1); Foot-ball Squad (1, 2, 3); Cricket Team (1, 2, 3, 4); Soccer Team (2, 3, 4); Foot-ball Team (4); Vice- Chairman Cricket Department (3); Chairman (4); Cricket Ground Committee (3, 4); Freshman Foot-ball Cup (1); Freshman Cricket Ball and Bat (1); Canadian Cricket Trip (2) ; English Ciicket Team (3) ; Winner of Foot-ball H (4); Corporation Scholarship (1); Class Basket Ball Team (4). David Scull Hlnshaw, Emporia, Kan. Born, Emporia, Kansas, November 4, 1884. Entered Freshman Year from Westtown School. Class Track Team (1); Class Soccer Team (1, 2, 3, 4); Class Foot-ball Team (1, 2); Foot-ball Squad (1, 2) ; Football Team (4) ; Track Team (1) ; Vice-President College Association (3) ; Assistant Soccer Manager (3) ; .Manager (4) ; Y. M. C. A. Cabinet (3, 4) ; Honor System (1,4); Student Council (4) ; Athletic Council (4) ; President Inter- collegiate Soccer Association (4) ; Joint Founder and Publisher of Cnllcgr Weekly (2, .3); Editor-in-Chief (4); .Junior Play Committee (3); Class Day Committee (4); Winner of Foot-ball H (4). 15 Richard Jones Mendenhall Hobbs, Born, Guilford College, N. C, January 1, 1888. Entered Senior Year from Guilford College, N. Scholarship (4) ; Winner Alumni Oratorical Contest. Guilford College, N. C. Senior Foundation LeRoy Jones, Richland, Iowa. Born, Richland, Iowa, January 2, 1878. Entered from Penn College, Oskaloosa, Iowa, September, 1910. Senior Foundation Scholarship (4); Class Day Committee (4). 16 William Lee Kleinz, Merchantville. N. J. Born, Merchantville, N. J., October 22, 1888. Entered Class Freshman year from Moorestown Friends ' Academy. Left end of Sophomore year. Class Foot-ball Team (1, 2) ; Class Soccer Team (1, 2) ; Class Gynina.sium Team (1, 2); Class Cricket Team (1); Second Gymnasium Team (1,2); Foot-ball Squad (1, 2) ; Class Numerals Foot-ball (2). Edwin R. Levi.v, Philadelphia, Pa. Born, Philadelphia, Pa , December 26, 1888. Entered Freshman Year from Friends ' Select School and William Penn Charter School. Class Track Team (1, 2); Class Cricket Team (1, 2); Cla.ss Foot-ball Team (2); Class numerals Foot-ball (2); Bowlinfr Team 11); Second G -mnasium Team (2); Track Team (1); Scrub Foot-ball Team (2); Foot-ball Team (3, 4); Captain (4); Manager Track Team (4); .Athletic Council (3, 4); Associate Editor Class Record (4); Winner Fool-ball H (3, 4). 17 Howard Franklin McKay, Wilmington, Ohio. Born, Gurneyville, Ohio, January 15, 1891. Entered Senior Year from Wilmington College, Ohio. Senior Foundation Scholarship (4). Louis Palmer, Media, Pa. Born, Media. Pa., July 28, 1889. Entered Class Freshman year from Friends ' Select School. Left middle of Freshman year. Class basket ball team (1). 18 Jesse Kersey Patrick, West Chester, Pa. Born, West Chester, Pa.. October 6, 1889. Entered Freshman Year from West Chester Hiph School. Cane man (1); Class Foot-ball Team (1); Leader Class Round Up (3, 4); Freshman Rules Committee (1) ; Hazinpr Committee (2) ; Mandolin Club (2) ; Glee Club (1, 2, 3) ; Operetta (3, 4); Associate Manajrer Musical Association (3); Cap and Bells Club (4); Chairman Play Committee (4); Athletic Council (3, 4); Assistant .Manager Foot-ball Team (3); Manager (4); Associate Manager Class Record (4); Member of Beta Rho Sigma Society. Levi . rnulb Post. Stanfordville, N. Y. Born Stanfordville, N. Y., July 8. 1889. Entered Freshman Year from Oakwood Seminary. Class Foot-ball Team (2); Corporation Scholarship (1, 2, 3, 4); Sophomore Latin and Mathematics Prizes (2); First Junior Reading Prize (3); Clementine Cope Fellowship (4) Class Treasurer (1); Secretary (2); Vice-President (3); President (3, 4) Chairman Junior Play Committee (3); Chainnan Class Day Committee (4) Che.ss Team (4); President Chess Club (4); Secretary Advisory Board (3) President Student Council (4) ; President -Athletic Association (4) ; Athletic Council (4); Vice-Chairman Gym Association (3); Y. M. C. A. Cabinet (4) Associate Editor Haverfordian (3, 4); Associate Editor Class Record (4) Captain Third Soccer Team (4) ; Foot-ball Scrub Team (2) ; Foot-ball H (3,4) Member of the Phi Beta Kappa Society. 19 Joseph Haines Price, West Chester. Pa. Born, West Chester, Pa., September 8, 1889. Entered Freshman Year from West Chester High School. Second John B. Garrett Reading Prize (3) ; Associate Editor of Havcrfurdian (3, 4) ; Associate Editor of Class Record (4) ; Class Vice-President (4) ; Class Day Committee (4) ; Junior Play Committee (3) ; Class Track Team (1, 2, 4). John Daub Renninger, Zeiglerville, Pa. Born, Zieglerville, Pa., February 20, 1890. Entered Class Freshman year from Perkiomen Seminary. Left end of Freshman year. 20 David Di ' er Reynolds, Kennet Square, Pa. Born, Kennett Square, Pa.. April !l, 18U( . Entered Freshman Year from Kennett Square High School. Class Cricket Team (1, 2, 3, 4) ; Class Soccer Team (1, 2, 3, 4) ; Class Track Team (1, 2, 3) ; Class Basket Ball Team (1, 2, 4); Class Foot-ball Team 11); Second Soccer Team (3) Soccer Team (4); Foot-ball Squad (2, 3, 4); Track Team (2, 3 4); Class Secretary (2) ; Mandolin Club (1, 2) ; Vice-Chairman Track Association (3) ; Chairman (4) ; Winner of 97 Foot ball Cup (3, 4) ; Round Up (4). Edwin Arthur Russell, Born, October 19, 1888. Entered from Westtown School. Philadelphia. Pa. Left at end of Sophomore year. 21 Victor Schoepperle, Oil City, Pa. Born, Oil City, Pa., January 1, 1890. Entered Sophomore Year from Harvard. Haverfordian (2) ; Editor-in- Chief (3, 4); Corporation Scholar.ship (3, 4); Vice-President Classical Club (3); Board of Governors of Haverford Union (3, 4) ; Vice-President of Cap and Bells Club (4) ; Author of The Patient Philosopher (4) ; Class President (4) ; Chair- man Nominatinfr Committee (4) ; Y. M. C. A. Cabinet (3, 4) ; Class Numerals Foot-ball (4) ; Manager Gymnasium Team (4) ; Student Council (4) ; Athletic Council (4) ; E.xecutive Board I. C. A. A. G. A. (4) ; Class Presenter (4) ; Class Day Committee (4) ; Editor-in-Chief CLASS Record (4). Lucius Rogers Shero, Racine, Wis Born, Smethport, Pa., April 5, 1891. Entered Freshman Year from Franklin and Marshall College, Pa. Cor- poration Scholarship (2, 3, 4); Class Secretary (1); Class Treasurer (2); Glee Club (1, 2, 3); Operetta (3); Cap and Bells Club (3, 4); Haverfordian (1, 2, 3, 4) ; Class Debating Team (2) ; Alumni Contest in Composition and Oratory (3); President Music Study Club (4); Vice-Chairman Preston Committee (3); President (4); Y. M. C. A. Cabinet (4). 22 Gibson Smith, Philadelphia, Pa. Born, Radnor, Pa.. July 26, 1889. Entered Class Freshman year from York High School, York, Pa. Left end of Sophomore year. Class track team (1, 2); Class gymnasium team (1, 2); Class basket ball team (1). Moorestown. N. J. Ebenezer Hall Spencer, Born, Sheffield, England. July 4, 1884. Entered Freshman Year from .Moorestown Friends ' Academy. Corporation Scholarship (1, :i, 4) ; Class Soccer Team (1, 2) ; Class Cricket Team (1, 2, 3, 4) ; Oratorical Contest (1, 2) ; Winner Everett Medal (2) ; Alumni Oratorical Contest (3) ; Class President (2) ; Treasurer (4) ; Class Debating Team (1, 2) ; Associate Bu.siness Manager Class Record (4); Class Day Committee (4). 23 Henry Bernard Stuccator, Philadelphia, Pa. Born, Russia, March 31, 1887. Entered Class Freshman year from Central High School. Class debating team (1, 2); Oratorical Contest (1, 2, 3). Howard Gardiner Taylor, Jr.. Riverton, N. J. Born, Taylor, N. J., June 4, 1890. Entered Freshman Year from Friends ' Select School. Class Basket Ball Team (1, 2, 4); Captain (1, 4); Class Foot-ball Team (2); Class Track Team (1, 2, 4) ; Class Soccer Team (1, 2, 3, 4) ; Class Cricket Team (1, 2, 3, 4) ; Class Vice-President (2, 4); President (3); Football Squad (3); Class Numerals Foot-ball (4); Class Numerals Soccer (3); Third Cricket Team, (1); Second Cricket Team (2) ; Cricket Team (3, 4) ; Captain (4) ; Soccer Team (4) ; Y. M. C. A. Cabinet (4); Winner Cricket Colors, Cricket H (3); Soccer H (4). 24 Walter J. Tebbetts, Richmond, Indiana. Born, Pasadena, Cal., January 1, 1889. Entered Class Senior year from Earlham College. Tennis team (4). Fredirick Oscar Tosten so.s, LeGrand, Iowa. Born, Le Grand, Iowa, May 31, 1888. Entered Class Freshman year from Westtown Boarding School. Class soccer team (1. 2, 4); Captain (1); Corporation Scholarship (2); Soccer team (1, 4) ; Class Treasurer (2) ; Winner soccer H (4). 25 Richard Tunis, Media, Pa. Born, Chestnut Hill, Pa., August 8, 1890. Entered Class Freshman year from .4sheville School North Carolina. Left end of Sophomore year. Charles Wadsworth, 3d, Philadelphia, Pa. Born, Philadelphia, Pa., April 5, 1891. Entered Freshman Year from William Penn Charter School. Class Gym Team (1, 2, 3) ; Class Soccer Team (3, 4) ; Class Track Team (2, 3, 4) ; Second Soccer Team (3, 4); Track Team (3, 4); Class Secretary (3); Class Treasurer (3) ; Student Council (4) ; Y. M. C A. Cabinet (4) ; Manager Tennis Team (4) ; Nominating Committee (4) ; Business Manager Class Record (4) ; Class Cricket Team (3, 4); Soccer Numerals (4); Track Numerals (4); Winner of Track H (4). 26 Caleb Winslow, Baltimore. Md. Bom. Baltimore, Md.. July 1, 1S89. Entered Freshman Year from Westtown School. Class Soccer Team (1); Class Cricket Team (1) ; Musical Club (1, 2 3) ; Class Secretary (4) ; Secretary- Treasurer Classical Club (4) ; Associate Editor Class Record (4) ; Art and Library Committee of Haverford Union (3, 4). V.M. Springfield, Mass. Hall Wilbur, Born, Palmer, Mas.s., September 24, 1888. Entered Class Fre.shman year from Springfield High School, Mass. middle of Freshman year. Mandolin Club 1 1 ) ; Cla.ss foot-ball team (1 ) ; ball squad (1). Left Foot- 27 Alan Sedgwick Young, Philadelphia, Pa. Born, Germantown, Pa., September 27, 1888. Entered Freshman Year from Germantown Academy, Central High School. Class Debating Team (2); Class Soccer Team (1, 2, 3 4); Second Soccer Team (4); Class Numerals, Soccer (4); Y. M. C. A. Cabinet (4); Associate Manager Class Record (4); Class Day Committee (4); Class Treasurer (4). WiLMER Job Young, Springfield, Iowa. Born, Springfield, Iowa, October 23, 1887. Entered Freshman Year from Westtown School. Class Foot-ball Team (1, 2); Class Basket Ball Team (2, 4); Class Cricket Team (1, 2, 3, 4); Class Soccer Team (1, 2, 3, 4); Captain (2, 3, 4); Soccer Numerals (1); Assistant Manager Cricket Team (3); Manager (4); Assistant Manager Harerforditvn (3) ; Manager (4) ; Y. M. C. A. Cabinet (3, 4) ; President Y. M. C. A. (4) ; Presi- dent College Associa ' ion (4) ; Nominating Committee (2, 4) ; Student Council (4); Athletic Council (4); Class Foot-ball Numerals (4); Soccer Team (1, 2, 3, 4); Captain (4); All Intercollegiate Soccer Team (2, 3, 4); Class Day Com- mittee (4); Winner of Soccer H (3). 28 ■■bmhii 1 a f 1 t 1 f • , 1 n -« J -f -f ' f 1 m 3 FRESHMAN YEAR iFrfsbmmt l iBlnni HERE have been many classes who have described the fear and terror which reigned in their respective bosoms as they approached this seat of learning for the first time. But it must not be supposed that so unordinary a class as ours came here in the ordinary and conventional manner By Heaven ' s gracious favor we had passed a modicum of an entrance examination, and the stirring story of Bill Hartshorne ' s arrival within these ancient purlieus shows the spirit at least which emboldened us all. Clad in his suit of Grand Army blue, its brass buttons gleaming in the September sunlight. Billum dismounted from the train, and grasping his well-worn suitcase in one hand and his shaving apparatus in the other, set off for his Merion room, humming merrily the lilt of a love ditty to a tune of his own invention. It was a fateful tune, for so interestsd was he in the trills and modulations of his superb soprano voice that he failed to notice Merion Cottage, modestly retiring behind the bushes at his approach. In short, our Billum proceeded along Railroad Avenue crooning his lyric, and turned in at the path of that private mansion just beyond the Conklin Gate. Deeming it beneath the dignity of a Hav erfordian to knock at his own door- bell, he boldly entered. Not at all abashed by the une.xpected signs of splendor about him, he mounted the stairs, seeking No. 7, Second Floor, Merion Cottage. Strange to say, the doors were not numbered, but Billum boldly opened one to obtain from a possible occupant information to the e.xact situation of No. 7. As it happened, it was the bathroom door, and the bath tub was occupied by a lady. The nymph screamed, our Bill blushed a modest crimson, and grabbing his suit case, fled in headlong haste. Tradition has it that his shaving utensils were left behind to .serve, if need be, as visiting cards;— a supposition supported by the fact that ever since he has removed the superfluous umbrageous foliage from his visage by means of the humble scissor. Quite as courageously, though perhaps not (|uite so romantically, did the rest of us make our way unto Robert.s Hall and there left with Oscar Chase our pedigrees and our baggage checks and set out to 31 locate our rooms and each other. We probably knew a trifle more about college customs than the usual September crop of verdure, since our tow-headed classmate from Kansas was well acquainted with a host of upperclassmen, and even at that early day might be seen walking arm in arm with Cac and Cece and giving the patronizing nod to Ike or even to Uncle Allen himself. But all this familiarity could not save us from the wrath which burst upon us that first Wednes- day. Our suspicions were slightly aroused when after supper we were gently but firmly led to Barclay Hall and promiscuously put to bed there. Those having night-garments were forced to don them, those not provided with such luxuries were compelled to wrap a pillow-case about their shivering nakedness, and our tormenters bid us an affectionate, though temporary good-night. But let us draw the veil of decency over the harrowing events of this occasion. Suffice it to say that we were plucked out of bed and made to go through the customary gymnastic performances before a gaping audience of the ungodly gathered around the window sill in Freshman Hell. Then it was discovered to the Educational World just what sort of a proposition it was up against, and our immediate guardians with great zeal and skill set to work to remove the objection- able asperities of our greeness. We were paraded next day after Meet- ing and eagerly seized ths opportunity to display our magnificent collection of ankles and calves to the admiring femi- ninity of the neighborhood. It ranged from Towser Clarke ' s diminutive shanks to the massive pillars which supported the sturdy frames of Hinshaw and Galla- gher, each pair of limbs a perfect specimen of its type. With garments reversed and garters tinkling from our ears we informed the world that we were very green. Billum absolutely refused to be marched past the scene of his indiscretion, and in the scuffle which followed this insubordination quite a number of our members were able to escape. Freshman PeC ' Vade 32 We had lost the Cane Rush, and in the Bridge Rush we were once again to match our strength with the Sophomores. With a shock which made old Founders ' Bell rock on its hinges, the two classes met on the Meeting Bridge and the battle was on. Man after man in our mad rush to attain the goal clambered perilously to the top of the pile, only to be snatched down into the vortex below. Bill, catch- ing sight of a female figure watching from one of the windows of his pseudo — Merion cottage dived to the bottom of the struggling, swearing mass of humanity and hid there in the terror of hi.s modesty. But these were in vain, for the officials called us off some moments before time was up. You see, some one was sitting on Bill Cloud ' s belly, and for five long minutes he proclaimed in agonizing roars that every atom of breath was being squeezed from his body. Under the circumstances the .judges thought it quite possible, and in order to spare the tattered sympathies of Dean Barret and other tender hearted bystanders, called Time and awarded the victory to the Sophomores. These were the rather strenuous means taken to impress upon us an ap- preciation of our relatively humble position in our little world. It was the cus- tom in those Spartan days of yore to permit a Freshman class to develop itself without any great assistance in the shap e of boot-licking. As we have hinted, there was plenty of supervision exercised by our immediate supervisors, yet on the whole were left to our own amusements. We left no bed unturned in our search for pleasure, and night after night old Barclay echoed with a crash of broken doors or the squeeks and gibbers of the frightened inmates as they were unceremoniously plucked fi ' om the arms of Morpheus and found their iron bed- steads looped around their necks. Even the peaceful shades of Merion were in- vaded, as if in answer to Bill Cloud ' s announcement that he would have the last lingering drop of blood of the villian who disturbed his dreams of pleasant Unionville. But the night when he found himself poised gracefully on one ear while he held the other in his mouth, he forgot all about any lingering drops of blood, and was only too happy when we left him shivering beneath his bureau while we went in search of another fledgeling to pluck from the downy hay. The other fledgeling in the person of Wilbur proved to be a rather fractious individual, but we ducked him in the brook to cool his hasty temper and left him there without benefit of clergy. It is eminently fitting at this time to chronicle the arrival of Charles Wadsworth, 3d, the old- est son of the oldest son of the and-so-forth, of General Wadsworth, who, as the reader will readily recall, fought in the Revolution, and at the Battle of Bunker Hill, lost his beard because he was so careless as to entangle it in the axle of a baggage wagon he was driving. We heard this formula ring- ing through Barclay Hall, and when we poked out our heads we expected to find some tall, pompous look- ing individual in a cocked hat and jack-boots, but it was only Waddy. What ho! we cried, the boy is bald! So he was. as bald as a doorknob. But some good Samaritans in our midst took him in and anointed his head with Herpicide and bound it up with a wig made of Mac ' s fur rug and put him in bed every night at nine. Shortly he was presentable. Some time towards the end of football season we cake-walked before the college and visit- ing alumni. We spared no expense either in cake or costumes. Jay and Waddy, as a Quaker couple with bonnet, carpet bag and reticule complete, were the winners, and it was then that that famous shad-bellied coat of Jay ' s first appeared, now such a familiar feature of our land- scape. Unfortunately for the complete pleasure of the occasion, two or three of our members were unwilling to take part in the festivities, and after the cake had been rolled in and fought over to the general satisfaction, we t urned our at- tention to the punishment of the recal- citrants. After a certain fleshy portion of their anatomies was sufficiently soften- ed by rubbing it over a well soaped floor, it was briskly run through the paddles, a ceremony which imparted a roseate blush to their respective epidermises which was wonderful to behold. The night before the Christmas holidays we prepared to light the lamp of learning in the shape of a bonfire on College Lane. In the gloaming after supper the class divided itself into scouting parties, 34 and soon the neighborhood was surreptitiously bereft of its movable combustibles. Fences, barrels, corn-shocks, lumber piles and even pig pens were plucked from their roots without ceremony. The boldest band of all was that which sneaked into a back yard on Spring Avenue and sprang out again with a four-wheeled slop-wagon in tow. having a flying start of a rescue party of razor-flourishing niggers which materialized from God knows where in the darkness. They were left far behind in the mad stampede through the alleys of Ardmore, and by the time the vehicle drew up at the bonfire site and disgorged its contents of boxes and door steps, hilarity was at its height. Let ' s have a ride, cried some one. Jump in, yelled Spencer, I ' ll steer. So the class piled in, Eben picked up the shafts and we trundled maje.stically off. As the hill became a trifle steeper the attraction of gravity got in its good work and the fat legs of our piebald steed fairly twinkled as they strove to keep ahead of the joy riders in the wagon behind. For the Lord ' s sake, put on the brake! yelled Eben. Jay Price had the handle of that instrument in his grasp, so consequently it was not applied, and the chariot rolled swiftly down what at any moment might have been the primrose path to perdition for us all. If our steed had stumbled we would have been hurled neck and crop over the skating pond fence into Beulah Land. But our guardian angels were on their jobs, so shortly we hauled back one more load of fuel and lighted the fire. The flames rose to the fabulous heights customary on such occasions, and as usual we had a squad of Ardmore police as guests of honor. After we had danced about the glow- ing embers and had heard a burning speech from Professor Billy Jackson, we cooled our ardor in the last and greatest water fight which ever dampened the walls of Freshman Hell. After the holidays we had to pass through that period always so full of mental anguish to a Freshman Class, that of the Mid Year examinations. Some few temporarily fell over the stumbling blocks of Math and Latin, but a suflicient number of us survived to extend the hand of welcome to our new members, Christie and Ed. Levin, who came about this time; Christie, with his Canadian nasalities, and Ed, who in time was to make good use of his powers of argumentative brow beating as a ' Varsity quarterback. Relieved from the pressure of cramming, we sought pleasure wherever it was to be found. Many a night did Arnold Post move his bed to all the corners of his room and even half way up the walls to e.scape the cascades of water or the showers of snuH which his much berated ceiling shed upon him, under the promptings of Lew Palmer and his gang of house-breakers. Herb (ial- lagher entertained a friend from the city, with the assistance of various of our members who innocu- lated him into mysteries of college life. It was Dick Tunis ' s pleasant custom to call together a few 35 friends for the purpose of giving Fallon a bath, not, perhaps, because he particularly needed it, but the Barclay bath-tubs had to be put to some use. When weather permitted there was always a sledding party somewhere or other, indeed it is not difficult to recall the one in which Jim Ashbrook received so many grevious and interesting injuries. Harold Worthington always had a merry jest to tell, or a rifle contest to conduct, and for an entertainment on a rainy day one could drop in at the Tonsorial Parlors of Hinshaw, the Westtown Barber, and hear one of his familiar dissertations on The Upper Classmen of My Acquaintance. Under the college rules then existing, we had to attend a certain number of classes, but there was always amusement as well as instruction to be found there. We arranged the usual Alarm Clock Serenades for Dr. Hancock without at all disturbing that gentleman ' s placid good humor. Dick Gum- mere was righteously incensed when Jay Price flourished a watch in his eye, and even the impetuous Jess had to remain silent before his A little less roughhouse, Mr. Patrick, if you please. But Tommy Brown ' s German class furnished the most amusement. The worthy Thomas had a particular five min- utes of each hour which he devoted to the awaking of the soporific somnolency of Deane, and another set of seven minutes in which he admonished with philosophic gravity the efforts of Downing and Winslow to disturb the equanimity of He Pigeon Post. So the Winter passed merrily away. After we returned from our Spring vacation there seemed little to worry about except class elections. Final examinations were ahead, but we had learned better than to give them any serious consideration in advance. Some of us tried our efforts on the flannel dotted cricket field, while others strolled out on Walton and watched Jim and Herb win honors for us on the track. There was a few of us recognized Spring ' s call to the young fancy of the lovelorn, but the most were content with a camping expedition or two to the banks of the sluggish Darby. The greatest of these was under the leadership of Ed Russell. We bathed with great delight in the inde- scribably oozy depths of the historic creek, exchanged a jest or so with the bystanding agriculturalist, and turned in on the downy cushion of Mother Earth. How our slumbers were disturbed by the gang of dastardly ruffians which turned out to be Herb and George is a delightful memory to those of us who can recall the joys and terrors of that night. It would indeed be a pleasant task to recall all the memories of that Spring, in many respects the most pleasant of them all. But Time has blurred many a merry incident, and some of the j oiliest figures in those memories of ours are with us no more. 36 SOPHOMORE YEAR (Class iHistnrii i ' o ihnmurr rar gLTHOUGH many events happened during our Sophomore year which would be suitable subjects for epic poems, our chronicler is not poetical but decidedly prosy. Otherwise the Reader would be hurried into sublimity and beginning mrdiax ctN would learn how Towser Clarke was hanged by the neck from a curtain pole in a Barclay Hall Study until he uttered the magical incantation Oh darn ! whereupon he was cut down by Hangman Mixter. A slight mention of the exciting bout between Hen Ferris and a husky Dutchman might entice the blase Reader to inquire further, and learn the jockeying which led up to the climax when Dutchie landed fair and sijuare on the tip of Hen ' s protruding iaw with such force that Hen forgot to extend it in his usual supercilious manner for several days after. Or perhaps a glimp.se of a young and pretty nurse within Barclay ' s grey walls would lead the amorous 39 Reader to taste more fully of a promised romance. Besides, if he were full of sentimental melancholy, he would eagerly follow up the scent of the tragedy, which followed the above-mentioned romance ; for the popularity of one of our class suddenly flourished like a green bay tree. Popularity, what a fickle mistress art thou ! But since our chronicler is not a poet he must begin in the conventional way and narrate duly the events in his pedestrian prose. Some of the class came back early and had the extreme pleasure of being patronized as belated brethren by the advance guard of the Freshmen who were taking their exams. On Tuesday the main body of the Class arrived. Immediately all peace was gone for the Rhinies, who, sweating under loads of all the paraphernalia of a college study, labored incessantly under the stern eyes of their Sophomore taskmasters. Old Founders ' bell tolled, night came on and the ways were shadowed. But the Curfew, which brings rest and cessation from work to all mortals, brought no rest to the weary Freshmen. For, although freed from the cares of bodily toil, they were harassed by the greater cares of minds foreboding evil. The sight of our class hat— that white emblem, to ourselves of purity and emancipation from our former greenness, to the Rhinies of authority — struck terror to their unsophisticated hearts. That evening we got together in Barclay and were entertained by a vaudeville troupe of Freshman talent. Camille La Blanche, in the character sketch of a bold, bad woman, was the living witness of the miserable consequences of yielding to temptation, so often luridly pictured by Uncle Allen in Fifth-day meeting. There were other numbers worthy of mention, but we must hurry on. But hold! While Professor Alcibiades was doing some clever tumbling, Captain Kiddo was speeding away on the Pennsylvania Railroad toward the smoky city, known in baseball lingo as the habitat of the Pirates. He reappeared latter, however, and took up his residence incognito in Ardmore. The next morning the college year was officially opened by Ike with a few remarks on hazing. We were given ten days to remove the greenness of our tender charges. Now this was a rather appalling task even to our stout hearts when we took stock of their personnel. 40 There were many celebrities, to wit, a veritable Hector from Westtown, not to mention a crafty Odysseus from the school across the road, and many others including a Germanic Venus. Speedily, however, we showed that we were masters of the situation. It was on Walton Field the afternoon of that very day. There stood our stalwart cane-men, Dean, Russell and Hinshaw. The pistols snapped. With a swoop we were on the cane and snatched the victory away from the Fresh- men. In the excitement which ensued many of the Rhinies escaped, but the few that appeared at sup- per were marched over to Barclay under a strong guard. By midnight all the runaways had either sur- rendered, preferring our tender attentions to a peaceful night with God ' s creatures under the open sky, or had been captured by our fleet-footed outposts. Meanwhile all was quiet in Barclay. The Freshies ' clothes had been packed away in barrels and the mode.st creatures were forced to hide their shame in bed. Now and then the Juniors smuggled in some pocket handkerchiefs and towels and a sortie created a momentary excitement. But such dis- turbances were nipped in the bud, and the culprits severely censured for their immodesty were put to bed again. At 12.15 Hector was sulking in solitary confinement on the third floor of North Barclay when the lights went out and our sturdy hero found himself on the floor blinking up through the bed springs into the barrel of a search light. Not long lay he thus. Promptly at word of command, thanks to his military training at We.sttown, he put together the segments of his bed, mounted, and was again dehorsed. Then he was rushed down to the window sill in Freshman Hell. Here the timorous Rhinies were gathered and in trembling voices delivered themselves of school yells, songs and speeches. The usual stunts, such as expanding like the Binomial Theorem, missing fire, et cetera, were gone through ad nauHeam to the accompaniment of groans and hisses from the audience, and the floor mop and water was generously applied to the good and punk performers alike. Thus were the Scriptures fulfilled : He sendeth rain on the just and the unjust. The peerade Thursday after meeting — the entertainment Friday night and horsing was a thing of the past. But we must make mention of the high character of the latter performance. It opened with review of the Merion militia and the Barclay band. Morris ' bear story and Elfreth as Cinderella in Birdie Bowerman ' s slippers were greatly appreciated by the assembled alumni and undergraduates. Nor .shall we .soon forget Buck Steere and Morris as cuckoo and peewee. 41 Now the general hazing was over, but every Friday night for some weeks the special sessions went merrily on. Our Hazing Committee fell over one another in offering their services as Torque- madas. Before long, however, nominations were made for the football department, and then no more was heard. Worthy ' s stern New Fresh, give us five reasons why you have been (pronounced bean) had up here. No longer was heard Pat ' s voice menacing a timorous culprit. At this junction our good presi- dent stepped in and ran things so effectively that the Freshmen adopted as their class hymn : Here ' s to damned old Spencer, Knock him down, knock him down. With us respectable hazing at Haverford was ended ; for after us the boot-licking policy now in vogue to- ward Freshmen was adopted. We may now pause and meditate on the changes the summer had brought to our class. Wilbur had gone to West Point, and Beejees Renniger was up in the Dutch country eating pretzels and smok- ing his Recruits. We no longer had Mac to harangue us in class-meetings. George had bidden us a long, last farewell, but appeared bright and early and immediately set about selling his old Yale banner. Billum was again resplendent in his regimentals. This time he found Merion Cottage with- out any adventures. Dan Boyer had torn himself away from those roast pigs we had at Yale and joined our ranks; and before long the invincible, inconvincables Dan, Cale, and Waddy formed their debating triumvirate. Vic, our one long-haired genius made his debut and gained a speedy reputation by editing the Middle Barclaij Squirt and from his clever table-talk, much to the disgust of Billum, Jack Bradway, and our other delicate, self-sensitive peccaviaries. That fall the college celebrated its seventy-fifth birthday. The festivities extended over several days. Speeches by distinguished orators, degrees conferred on eminent sons of Haverford, the splendid weather, good cheer, and enthusiastic spirit, which marked that occasion will never be forgotten. That 42 Saturday we formed by classes and, headed by the Alumni in costumes an d a band, paraded out to the field and cheered our boys to victory over F. M. But, although our hearts swelled with pride as the result of this game, our sensations could not be compared with our pride as members of the Class of 1911 upon our victory over 1912 ' s Wogglebug- gers. Dick Tunis, our full-back, scored the only touchdown, and was the hero of the day. But the other fellows did their part. Jay kept his man out of everj ' play in spite of the pitiful wail: This fellow ' s holding me. Towse Clarke was on the side lines; Ma wouldn ' t let him play, and besides, what could 120 lbs. do in the line? Eben had been regarded as a promising candidate in the line, because of his weight, but he could not be induced by any arguments to don the mole skins. After the game we put two of our opponents in bed with in.iured backs, a third bit off the end of his tongue, but all subsequently recovered. From this time on our Woggle-bug career has been one of untarnished splendor. The time pa.ssed rapidly and for the mo.st part pleasantly. Christmas came and then the Mid Year ' s were upon us. During this period some of us lived in mortal terror, only a few of us. however, re- ceived valentines from Oscar. About this time Jay gave a party in Merion to celebrate pulling through Mid Year ' s. In the course of the evening the company became hilarious and after an exciting game of Strip Poker they loaded Jay ' s old horse pistols. Just then an automobile came slowly along Railroad Avenue and Jay let ' ergo. There was a report like a twelve pounder, the auto put on full speed and disappeared up the road. Presently another machine came along from the opposite direction. Bang I went the pistol. The machine came to a halt and a man running up under the window shouted in a rich brogue, I say. did you see any one shooting around here? When the fellows replied that it was only some shingles that had blown off the roof, the man became scurrilous and went away swearing in a quaint though indelicate manner. Then next day Dean Palmer announced that some fellows while shooting had 43 badly frightened a party of autolsts. It appears that one old lady thinking it a hold-up, fainted dead away. Excitement was the order of the day about this time. The Freshmen had long been restive under the stern discipline of our good president and suddenly the meeting came to a head. They resolved to visit him in a body and convince him of the error of his ways. Of course there was no idea of intimida- tion or revenge, but what better time could be chosen than 1 A. M. For, to be sure, he might not be found at home earlier in the evening and besides, there is no better time for one gentleman to talk to others in a heart to heart manner than at that witching hour when the birds are asleep in their nests and the only sound is the whiffle whoofing of an owl or the moan of a dreaming dog. Unfortunately, we could only look upon this friendy visit as gi-oss insubordination. All rules were put into force again and a number of specials were promptly given to the worst offenders. The cross country jaunt to which we invited the attendance of the ring leaders will never be forgotten by them. We mention this incident because it led up to another of more dramatic interest. About a week later Jay was sitting over in his cell in the Annex smoking his corn-cob pipe, grace- fully dallying with his coat tails and ruminating over the peaceful meadows of the Brandywine, when up flew a window in the cottage and a voice called, Price, wanted on the ' phone! With an incipient smile at the prospect of an enjoyable chat with some fair Lady Charming, Jay briskly ambled toward the cot- tage barely conscious of a team of restive horses eagerly clamping their bits before the doors of Mer- ion. Now he opened the door and anon the cursed band of conspirators crouching in the shadowed vesti- bule sprang upon him with murder in their hearts. Jay struggled valiantly, but valor was before long overcome by superior numbers. Even at the steps of Merion hall, Which all the while ran blood, our Jabus fell. 0, what a fall was there, my class-mates ! Then I, and you, and all of us fell down. Whilst bloody treason flourished over us. Bound and gagged our unfortunate and bleeding classmate was carried away toward the waiting team. One minute more and he would be hurried away to some lonely spot, where the business so basely begun might be as foully finished. But at this crisis Fortune, that fickle goddess, smiled upon poor Jay. Foot- 44 steps were heard in the distance and the craven thugs slunk away in the darkness, leaving their unfort- unate victim bound and bleeding in the road. But Jay was still full of fight. He wriggled out of his thongs and, after the blood had been washed away and fresh clothes donned, went about trying to locate the bruisers. For several days only the boldest of our num- bers ventured forth after night- fall without the escort which our friends, the .Juniors, generously offered. Soon the spring was upon us. What more need be said to those who have spent a spring in our enchanted gardens? Books were laid aside, and excursions were made to the Darby and the rust- ling woods of the South Valley. Even the glamor of Beechwood Park was not without attractions. Waddy and Cousin Bill Cloud were the most persistent hedon- ists, until Waddy, while playing to worry about excepts our Finals tag with the gondolas, fell into the Grand canal. Fearing arrest he slunk out of the park wet and filthy from the slimy ooze, a sad change from the jaunty dude, who had so blithely entered those gates so short a time before. Even Fallon renounced for the more subtle charm of Nature those roaring trips to town, whence, no matter how many tuns of ale were consumed, he never failed to return on the 10. 15 train. We gave the annual love feast to the Freshmen in the cricket pavillion, upon which oc- casion the Spoon was presented, showing that the hatchet had been buried forever. From this time on we lived in perfect peace with our brothers, with nothing Class day commencement, with the charm which only a Haverfordian can fully appreciate, and we were speeding to the ends of the earth on our long vacation. 45 JUNIOR EAR = ' T m j n Wh M ; ' HE plum-colored suit of Bill Hartshorne ' s was no more. Post ' s austere Quaker hat was left at Stanfordville in the bath tub that grandfather never used, and the gilt copy of Milton which that venerable old centaur couldn ' t see much in was brought to Haverford with its glorious colored pictures of Paradise Lost. No longer did the one-time P ' reshmen look up to us with the dread love of the preceding year, but rather began to emulate the Seniors in caustic comments on our virtues. For we have always been a virtuous class, — and virtue di.sgusts the motley. 47 Ed Russell and Hal Worthington had deserted us for pastures new, Worthington at Yale, where he learned to stomach creme-de-menthe and flourished like a green bay tree. Russell, however, tethered himself to the printing busi- ness, as if he were of more value there than here ! Wink Kleinz got into wool, and now alas for us, he has become affianced to some sundry person of femi- nine sect. Herb Gallagher also heard the call of the wild, and now he talks of bond and stocks, money and banks, as if these were idle tiddle-de-winks. Among our departed also we mourned Kit Fallon, Kit our straight whiskey kid, who could get soused on consomme soup flavored with imag- ination. The last to get weary of the milk and honey of Haverford was Bill Cloud, Bill, our dangerous man, afraid neither of Red Lions nor of creditors. He had gone to State, there to be tapped immediately by the best fraternity. Alas, we never appreciated Bill ! and now we learn that Bill is inhaling the intoxicating air of bold bad California. But the class was perhaps too breathless with expectancy to ponder seriously over the loss of good men — breathless and excited in the anticipation of the arrival of our true genius. Rumor had heralded from afar the social athletic and literary savior and redeemer of Haverford College, — from Andover and New York he came, trailing clouds of glory, to speak nothing for the nonce about several trunks full of lola the Sin Eaters, besides lyric verses of personal, juvenile and professional qualities. 48 Ah I reader, do not weep. As Rufus insists, this fleeting life is ever not quite, and when the poet sing ' s: Captured and bound I lie to-night Chi the pirate ship desire, and — Gire me the lipn that knou- Iiou ' to kiss Wlien licr lips are pressed against mine. Then you may know how keenly the genius feels, how all is ever not-quite. But we are less inclined to believe in Genius for the flashes he so generously bestows on The Haverfordian. as for the pretty conceits and eccentricities which are to us proof of genius. Ah, my friends, no, — no, I cannot have my picture taken with you. In fact, it is one of my little eccentricities never to have my picture taken at all. Yes, that ' s poetry. Ah, yes, my little volume of poems — and I must go over to New York to-day to stage my dramatic skit. You see, I always do my literary work between two and four in the morn- ing. No, I do not get poetry written any more — society, you know, society. This morning I wrote seven regrets, seven regrets — the only thing for me to do is to write my regrets in verse. These were the melancholy days when Vic ' s Memorabilia came out. The Memorabilia was a col- lusion of sharpers which published a fifty cent scrap book, and perpetrated it on the community for four dollars apiece. Oscar Chase magnanimously charged it on the bill, and Vic, with convincing jargon, hypnotized each subject, suggesting that a word like Memorabilia on the year bill would convince any unsuspecting father that his son wa.s so assiduously at his Latin that he needed some such extra- ordinary book. The dope went so well that Vic was made agent for two rival companies, who bcseiged him with propositions, contracts, offers, commissions and territory. Then came the panic. Memora- bilias were thrown on the market at 50 and 75. In the midst of the flurry the collusion busted. Insin- uous talking machines of human aspect would tap on the door of Schcepperle Boyer Co., enter and explain, argue and prove, that the rival corporation was a hybrid nest of pirates, buzzards, cut-throats and robbers. There came a wild gleam in Vic ' s eye. and his nose grew longer every day. Purchasers of the watered stock received letters from home saying that the bill had arrived, and father ' s hair had turned 49 gray over night. A breathless Aethopian would call Vic from his immersion in Rufus and Anaximander, and send him flying to the office on a very important matter. Pale and trembling he would ponder on the solution of such an unprecedented interruption. Waiting for him would be a Memorabilia man— and usually they opened fire on Vic by promising to arrest him he was in a company which had stolen their idea. But when the talk-dust was settled and the bluff called, the Memorabilia man would depart with as little nerve left as it takes for a lion to spit in the face of a jack rabbit. And Vic would shut himself in his room and write edi- torials— men are always beautiful when they work. So Winter is lovely, gray, sad time, and some men become beautiful in Win- ter, because the cold and the loneliness and the dullness of Winter make them think. These were the days of Schneider, Barclay Hall ' s prize tomcat. Schneider came to live with Caleb, having seen Caleb ' s ostermoor and suspected him of belonging to the canine genus. Cale harbored Schneider for several weeks and taught Schneider to drink milk without making a noise, besides other polite manners which cats do not easily acquire— especially after they have grown up. Schneider was a grown-up cat, and no amount of inducement on the part of D. B. Boyer or others of his brood would make Schneider eat liver pills. Schneider would only look wise and purr softly. Vic is suspected unjustly of having made Schneider respectable by artificial processes. Hankey ' s Forum flourished at this time, due to the pyrotechnic oratory of A. S. Young, Jack Bradway, and Towse Clarke. The former two gentlemen, costumed in bathrobes, began their subsequent dramatic successes by enacting on the rostrum a playlet in the usual Bryn Mawr strain, in which a duel 50 was fought with hat-pins over a faiyre ladye. It was realistic enough, for it indicates a certain amor- ous and erotic temper in the gentlemen in question. It was full of the usual pangs, sighs, throbs, wilt thous, villains I and other graphic and romantic euphuism. On another occasion the .stalwart orator with the resounding pot of entrails argued for suffragism with devout and faithful loyalty to his Bryn Mawr creed. Tadpoles. he said — tadpoles, if they are fed on too little food turn out ninety per cent. males. But if they are fed butter, cheese and succotash they develop ninety per cent, into the divine and eternal feminine. Therefore, my friends, women, ought to live on the fat of the land, aud—and therefore they ought to have the suffrage ! Towser Clarke argued with less logic but with more reason. Liberty, he said, Liberty is the great principle of our glorious government. Now a man can walk down Chestnut Street v.-ith his pants on and the police will allow him the privilege of liberty. But if he tries to walk down Chestnut Street with his pants OFF— ah ! mercy days, my friends, this would indeed be license . ' ' ' On this distinction we can only observe that for Towser to walk Chest- nut Street would hardly even be a matter of liberty- nothing worth a scream— but for Alan, ah ! license shroud thy face in modesty! Thus merrily went the days. The Round-up in the gymnasium produced the great tramp troupe of Patrick, which the spirit moved to do great deeds. The remarkable levita- tion act performed by Jeff Clark would have put the blush to Eusajjia Palladino herself. To finish the gam- bols of the evening the gay gambolier himself discarded his coat to disclose the corset and accoutrements. Thus attired, he led the orchestra to a finish that brought down judges, house, cup. 51 and all. We, with all our austerity, walked away that night with the prize for the funny act. It was at about this time that two of our class gathered together with some of the Dragon ' s Blood of 1910 to worship at the sacred shrine of Saint Patrick. An effigy of the jolly old Saint lay prostrate in the middle of the ghostly room, surrounded by sanctified candles and bottles of spiritual essences. The meeting was purely spiritual. The sub-conscious self of G. Washington Mixter rose high above the threshold, and he delivered himself of a valuable and illuminating lecture on the Seminole war, with imitations of how the shrieking Seminole scalped the colonists. This was a source of great annoy- ance to the discursive Schoep, who was at the same time proclaiming to the world the nature of the pure aesthete, and the scope and value of the aesthetic life. The Dragon ' s Blood of 1910 was by this time also diluted with other essences, and the demonstration of the proper methods of tackling foot- ball players interfered seriously with the higher flights into the ideals of history and aesthetics. One early Spring afternoon Howard Taylor called a class meeting, and pulled a slip of paper on the un- suspectants, appointing the commit- tees as per Authority. So we kn ew then that Junior Day was at hand. Alan Young spent secret nights talk- ing in falsetto to himself about the Roman pillars and fountains in the gym, Dave carried the cares of the world with his usual sad enjoyment, and poked post holes in the ground without even asking for sympathy. The inevitable Prince Albert coat-tails of Price flapped in the wind as he flurried towards his reeking corn-cob. Bill Gardiner negotiated with Trower ' s stomach-aches in his facetious manner (and now, alas, he has chained himself on the rocks of matri- mony). Best of all, Authority himself smiled benignantly upon the labors of his brood, while he 52 enclosed His card at the expense of the Class in the invitations even of the Dragon ' s children. But the Blood was upon Him, the marching club turned tail and conspired against Authority and the Divine Right of Tyrants, and the golden bowl was loosed and the silver cord was broken. In this bloodless Revolution, the head of Sejanus was tossed over the battlements, and Towser Clarke ' s cr ' for Liberty and Democracy was fulfilled. There was grape-.iuice in Haverford after that. At the Play — The Big Match, Patrick, our ever versatile comedy, combined his foolery with speeches about Nature in all her efflorescence and set the audience in a roar. In Pat alone is enough effervescence to absorb all the sombre soberness of our Quakerish members, and even then there will be a good laugh left. He can make even a Quaker crack ungodly smiles over his tremendous trifles. Junior Day was a great day. All the affinities and near affinities, and even .some of the charming ladies of the neighborhood ventured to our Junior Day — even tho.se who do not know what a man ' s man is — hon- oured us by appearing. Alan ' s fountain plashed, splashed and dashed, Trower fed the multitude, and fully five members of 1911 smoked a cigarette that night. And finally the great day was over and Spring came. The chug-chug of the lawn mower, and French cricket, and the annual Italian combination bands, — all made study impossible. The.se were the palmy days. Geo. Mixter, gown broker, and universal three-ball man. chewed and jewed with Seniors and Juniors, until he at last had the Class robed in its new glory. Attired in spotless white trousers we marched into the dining-room — even Vic, who had shouted at Authority, It ' s nobody ' s damn business what kind of pants I wear — thus trousered, we hung our clapper in Founder ' s Bell and the College was ours. Often wandering in the Summer months we lived again tho.se glorious Spring days at Haverford, and hearts ached to be back with the old voices and faces, and to be called again into the day ' s routine by the .song of Founder ' s Bell. 53 LLOYD HALL AND DINING ROOM gE[([iiii: mm. - : J QRECOCIOUS as ever, it was not the usual solemn melancholy so touchingly described in the yearning language of the ordinary Class Record that our class felt on approaching the weighty responsibilities of Seniorhood, that threshold of life through which we pass with an ever increasing accompaniment of hope and expectation. No. even in the midst of the hearteasing follies of Juniordom, we had l)egun to chafe somewhat under the domination of nineteen-ten. We felt that ' twas really we that before we subdued the world were destined to make of Haverford a paradise and put our swell- ing theories into triumphant practise. Doubtless our predece.s.sors smiled at our insubordination .just as we in turn from our all-seeing mountain-top are now unable to gue.ss how Alma Mater can ever survive the shock of our imminent parturition. At any rate we began early to overhaul the rubbish of the ages. The Y. M. C. A. was duly fitted out with a constitution, when the Weekly began to quarrel with the Haverfordian what form Student Government should take. It was finally decided that the Council should be a fatherly body to watch over the weak of the flock, to pluck the disguising wool from the wolves and to quell the lusty horns of the yearlings, in short, to guide us all to the stars. The diffi- culty has been to find eleven men to head such a pious crusade. The dining-room would not be itself without a modicum of transvolitant missiles, nor shall we ever see Haverford so denatured as to cause the bankruptcy of the post-midnight local. Hardly had Jim begun his inspiring gyrations at the first football meetings, when Dave called an assembly of the Rhinies. We shuddered to think of the carelessness of preceding generations in letting ignorant Freshmen shift for themselves with only an occasional bit of council from misguided Sopho- mores. No more of that! The world ' s great age must begin anew. So for the good of the universe in an enthusiastic gathering the Freshmen were prologued by Dave, monologued by Dave and epilogued by Dave with occasional remarks by other representative men. It has always pleased us to feel to the utmost our responsibilities. No more the insouciant loaf or the nonchalant stroll. Some worried the pigskin insistently, some cast a knowing eye ahead and started to undermine the mountain of inevitable cosmic burrowings. Perhaps our state of sober- ness, almost of nobility, was furthered by our new arrivals, Jones, the mellifluous lofty-domed phil- osopher; McKay, the man with the serious sense of humor; Hadley, of Kansas, and Hobbs, from Nawth Callina. Farquhar ' s sporting habits prevent his inclusion among these sedate ones. The non- descript Tebbetts also loomed large amongst us. Then, too, how great a volume of merriment was lost with Dick, with George, who began selling pants, and with Bill, who has since set up an altar of his own. Of the rollicking band that in Freshman Year moved earth and heaven, only Patrick was left, but even he, ah, how changed ! Even he was growing gray with the entanglements of perverse football accounts. Early in the year Vic would have relapses into hedonism and announce a class feed. But age will tell, punch and pretzels had lost their magic, and with the advent of the operetta to write Vic gave up. Strenuously James injected inspiration into the football meetings with the regularity of a force pump. Sternly Ed led us to glorious victory over Lehigh. Wildly we celebrated on the return trip. Unremittingly Dave pointed with pride to the black and blue of Cox ' s tracks on his lower limbs. Solemnly speaking, the football season ended diminuendo, crescendo if we consider the giants of our 56 Football Hero last game. Caesar automatically engineered the Y. M. C. A., assiduously angelic even in his hours of ease. Lucius solemnly rumbled in the Pre.ston choir. Arnold posed as a saint for the edification of Coopertown. The Bryn Mawr Brigade fussed steadily, soberly and thoroughly. Amid this general seriousness the Altruist Club began its nodes Merion- enses and soon became a bright circle of mirth where soul flowed as freely as tea, and tea was served by mugfuls. As their reputation increased, their visitors grew more numerous until scarcely a member of the class had failed to visit the room of the smoky fireplace and the dim lights, to take part in the grim vocabular tournaments that enlivened the place, and to play golhockey into the wee hours until plaster fell in bushels and all Merion was awakened at the sound. Another resort of mirth was the company that tried to repeat our success of the year before in the Round-Up. Patrick ' s negro minstrels performed prodigies of valor and spilt quantities of water in the magnificent fire service at the burning of the house in Black Oak Lane. Nevertheless we had to give the palm to our old rivals, the Juniors. Vic told us in an editorial that Christmas had come. After vacation we indulged in a very suc- cessful banquet crowned with much limpid rhetoric. Soon Oscar informed us with his billets-doux that exams were over and passed — gone, rather. We graduated from Rufus ' Embryology of the Soul into Ike ' s discourses on Fir.st Aid to the Ungodly. Then, too, came the mild announcement that the place of our beloved Hanky would be filled by Mr. E. K. Maxfield, alias Ezrique. Ah, the awful shock ! For without warning he arrived and proceeded to browbeat us, to scorn us, to turn our A ' s into D ' s. But the worm turned. Soon egged on by the Sophomores, he became tame enough to eat out of the hand, and has since lost all his ferocity. He confided to us that rather than have us follow any former writer as a model, such as the careless Stevenson or the antique Addison, he would make us our own models. He has builded better than he knew, for who but our own Altruistic Rhadamanthine .Jay is to sit in judgment next year over the unlicked cubs that aspire to literary fame? Cae.sar now came into his own, and the soccer team began its enviable record. The Student Council also got in its good work and set a record that will doubtless not soon be overpassed. For at one swoop it laid low eleven, a lmost decimating the dining-room attendance. After this Oscar ' s ear was fairly safe from flying cherries, and Aunt Martha could almost breathe freely. Csesar now, 57 remembering his awful position as religious head of the college, headed a mammoth crusade for the annihilation of the liquor traffic. The liquor traffic was thoroughly annihilated, and it is a miracle, even now to be remembered with gratitude to heaven, that some of the flowers of our youth were not utterly extinguished beneath the triumphant progress of that righteous unswerving Juggernant of a pious crusade. 58 At last that tragic season arrived when one after one we had to leave our cherished projects to shift for themselves. Vic said farewell to the Haverfordian, trusting it rather gingerly in the hands of another, fearing lest the Weekly might gain some shade of advantage, for Dave would not so soon quit his beloved offspring. It is very touching. Each of us espouses some organiza- tion and before our first love has waned, after one brief year we must part. Unwilling we are ; but there comes the stern shears of Atropos unswervingly separating us from our only just embodied conceptions. It is hard not to feel that we are, perhaps, leaving these, our darlings, to those who will be but stepmothers, yet we can only hope that they have been the better for our year ' s nursing and will continue to grow and prosper. We shall have other work to do and we are not without joy at the prospect. ' And his spirit leaps within him to be gone before him then Underneath the light he looks at, in among the throngs of men. ' The WoQolebuo Caesar ha.s said goodby to the Y. M. C. A. The sportive attire of the cricketers daily dots the green. The porch of the Union is nightly the rendezvous of a luxuriously lethargic band. The motley throng to flit like ghosts another year about the old haunts, all-seeing, but voiceless, — these have been chosen. Jay and Cale and Bill and John and Ed will form a nucleus next year for the gatherings of the prodigals. For some of us know we shall be far away, some of us do not. We are all going to conquer worlds, slay dragons and what not; but never shall we travel so far, nor climb so high, nor fall so low, as not to keep warm and vivid the unbreakable heart-ties of Alma Mater. For what we do, be Haverford ' s the glory. Let us be worthy of her. OPERETTA FINALE Wptvtttn. N Junior Year the Glee Club gave one performance— that is, it gave but one performance. The word gave is literal, for the house was paper. Reasons have been suggested— the most plausible one being that the Glee Club did not glee. In addition, our greatest competitor for public patronage in classical music, Hammerstein with his Grand Uproar Co., was presenting a salacious performance of Salome on that very night. When a sound like the rubbing of a cheap brick over a piece of sand-paper came rasping from the Glee Club, many good Quakers slipped off to Hammerstein ' s Peanut. They wanted to get as far away from it as they could. Prom what? From Salome, of course. The next day our new Impresario, Mr. C. Linn Seller, called a confab of the musical clubs, and having requested them not to think of bursting forth into song, announced that an operetta would be given, which would make the Wai k and Mig feel sorry that it ever had presumed to hang out a shingle. Even Salome would seem vapid. Nineteen Eleven had been represented on the Glee Club by Patrick, the man with a voice like a ' cello (when it is well oiled) ; Shero, the fog-horn of Preston ' s spiritual darkne.ss, Boyer with no voice at all, and .Jack Bradway, with the .soft (Bryn Mawr influence) voice — a mellow tenor, almost ripe. They were a good quartet, these four, especially good at lullabies. The operetta was called Tlic Big Match. It may have been sensational, but something had to be done. This operetta, after two and a half months ' work, was produced in Roberts ' Hall, under the auspices of 1911. It was a delightful little comic opera, and there was not only local color in it, but 61 it had a moral running through it. For did not the impersonator of our dear Prexy, following his example to the letter, advise the absinthe-bibbing English lord to drink Haverford dairy buttermilk? — instead of holding a carouse at the Pink Pussy Bar. Even Uncle Allen was seen in the audience vig- orously nodding approval. Also some others were nodding — there are always a few rough edges on a premiere — but the anticipation of the gym full of bowers, flowers, and Trowers kept the audience fairly well awake — some even in an enthusiastic state, so that the neoteric Thespians were repaid for their footlight efforts. And Patrick was really funny — so funny in fact that it must have hurt some of the orthodox to grin so much — and maybe some even laughed. One speech of Patrick ' s is enough : — Nature in all her efflorescence, and to adapt the thought of the poet Shakspere, — ' Nature her- self out-natures Nature. ' Now night droops her darkening head ; the feath ery flock silent court sleepy Morpheus in the sighing luxuriancy of the trees. Meseems the very nymphs and dryads flit hither and thither, intoxicated by the lustrous joy that pervades the lunate night. Hark ! Hark ! methinks the earthen worms strum in the soggy mother earth a debilicous sym- phony of melodious runes. The show missed fire a little because our Prima Donna, our dainty English Evelyn, was called away three days before the initial performance. Jimmy Whitall bravely volunteered to feminize the role, and he did well, considering the time in which he metamorphosed his sex. But his hands, which are accustomed to seek cigarettes in his trouser ' s pockets were quite at loss where to go, so they sought consolation in their misery by clasping each other, like two young and awkward lovers. Besides Patrick, Nineteen Eleven had Shero in a cap and gown worthy of his pious dignity, while Bradway and Boyer cavorted about the stage in new white flannels, and did the pantomime dialogue in unspeakable English. The guests after the performance were foddered at the gymnasium and on the campus, which was strung with a fairyland of lanterns. From different parts of the campus could be heard snatches of Won ' t you be my Sweetheart? Lady Nicotine, and later on The Island of Rest. During vaca- tion, which began next day, the troupe gave performances at the Merion Cricket Club, Germantown and West Chester. On Friday afternoon the celebrated Southern trip began. At Wilmington the company was received by a bevy of beautiful girls, and that night they — the company — took the Special sleeper to Baltimore. They should have taken a cattle car if they expected the receipts to pay their freight. 62 The Baltimore audience was small but appreciative, for the performance was by now going with per- fect precision. After the performance, another dance, and the troupe rested safe over Sunday in the homes of Baltimore Haverfordians. Shortly after the return, a meeting was called for the purpose of announc- ing the deficit. Behind the scenes of a comic opera is a good place to look for tragedies! Nature in all her ejjloreitcence. ' (Eap an I Ub NEW bond issue was shortly floated in order to prevent any further defunct Musical Clubs and defunct Operettas. The Impresario called a conclave in Lloyd Hall, where a Constitution was waved in the faces of the Big Match outfit— a Constitution which founded The Cap and Bell Club of Haverford College, and assured the agitated members that deficits could never again occur. It immediately initiated its ideas on economy by purchasing a thousand sheets of letter paper, at ten cents a sheet, and set to work on prospects for the proverbial best show Haverford has produced. Shortly after football season the work began. Seller and Mellor labored with fifty awkward Quakers, trying to teach them to hear music when it is played, and to trip a technical toe to the measures. They were almost hopeless. Vic spent the Christmas vacation tearing his hair over The Patient Philosopher. He, too, was almost hopeless. After three waste- baskets of manuscript were burned, he finally produced the play, a lyric comedy, he called it, for he knew that no one had ever written anything like it before. It was unique. Perhaps nobody will ever write another lyric comedy. Shep says he hopes not. In the meantime the Root Beer Kid was slinging paint in the attic of the Dairy, doing a Hos- pital Scene, and another on Nietzsche ' s Newport Estate. It was a great educational experience for Cholly, for he learned how to swear in the most approved English. All during the late winter. The Patient Philosopher was sung and said, until when Junior Day came in Early Spring, the extravaganza was ready for the boards. The audience swarmed Roberts ' 64 Hall, applauded all the songs, and miracle of miracles, laughed at all the jokes. Of our class we had the playwright, the title role, and a cast part. Patrick as the Patient Philosopher acted the part with his usual humorous acumen, and kept the audience in risibles from the moment he entered. His appearance in lavender pajamas and red- lined bath-robe was enough, without a word or a gesture, and his ease on the stage was accentuated by the presence of a bed, than which nothing can possibly make him happier. Boyer was a most winning book agent, with a perpetual stream of talk in which he was in his element, and a chorus of sweet automobile girls. The way he chucked them under the chin, and described to them his eccentricities would have put the blush to a real artist, while the reverberations of his singing voice would have cracked a hard-boiled egg carefully nestled in a pillow. Girls, girls, girls, is dancing not the art divine? Yes, there is always a smile on my ' HP I? when the music trickles into my ears. jML ' W- ;( The rest of the cast parts were as well taken, and particularly by Hal Thomas, who gave Pat a run for the laughs. And as usual, next year ' s performance ought to be even better. What would we do without Faith, Hope. — and Charity? The Cap and Bells is an organized club. It will present the Haverford amateur theatricals more systematically, since it profits permanently by it own experience. And better, for as it selects the talent impartially from all the college, it promises to raise the standard of plays presented. It aims to foster at Haverford the musical, dramatic, artistic, and literary instincts of the college, and in this aim a limited group of graduates and undergraduates are working. 65 A alirttt JplitloBnpl rr A Lyric Comedy in Two Acts. Characters. Selma Hoyt — Tlie head nurse of the hospital D. P. Falconer, ' 12 Reginald Mackenzie Kennedy — A victim of an auto accident D. C. Murray, ' 12 Dr. Job Woodson — The resident physician of the hospital, engaged to Selma K. A. Rhoad, ' 12 Miss Pomeroy — Assistant training nurse ■ H. M. Lowry, ' 12 JosiAH RoYCE Nietzsche — Author Philosopher J. K. Patrick, ' 11 Assistant Nurse — In hospital Wm. H. B. Whitall, ' 14 Attendants in Hospital E. Wallerstein, ' 12; R. A. Locke, ' 14; J. P. Green, ' 14 TOUTY Poole — A race track tout • H. M. Thomas, ' 12 Aloysius Heep — Private Secretary to Mr. Nietzsche L C. Poley, ' 12 A Reporter R. L. Fansler, ' 12 Mrs. Nietzsche — Wife of Philosopher J. M. Whitall, ' 10 James and John — Servants in Nietzsche estate S. S. Morris, ' 12; F. R. Stokes, ' 14 Launcelot Smythe — A book agent D. B. Boyer, ' 11 Pierrot Dancers— D. B. Boyer, ' 11; H. M. Thomas, ' 12; E. Wallerstein. ' 12; J. B. Elfreth, ' 12; H. M. Lowry, 12; C. H. Crosman, ' 13; K. P. A. Taylor, ' 14; D. Waples, ' 14; J. C. Ferguson, 2nd, ' 14. Girls in 2nd Act— H. M. Lowry, 12; C. H. Crosman, ' 13; W. H. B. Whitall, ' 14; D. Waples, ' 14; J. C. Ferguson, 2nd, ' 14; K. P. A. Taylor, ' 14. Men IN 2nd Act— R. L. Fansler, ' 12; H. Froelicher, Jr., ' 12; J. B. Elfreth, ' 12; E. Wallerstein, ' 12; O. M. Porter, ' 13; H. C. Heym, ' 14; R. A. Locke, ' 14; J. P. Green, ' 14; R. S. Phillips, ' 14. Act. 1. A Public Ward of a Hospital. Early fall evening. Act. XL The Nietzsche Estate at Newport. A few weeks later. Evening. 66 Here is a versatile bundle of sijmptoms— symptoms of Art, of Music, JAMES ASHBROOK. Jimmy Babbit ' s ole fellah himself— Jimmy Brook, or Jimmy Ash, what versatile style can describe his versatile humours ! Anaximagoras himself was not such a man. Medicine, Science, Literature and all the rest. Jeems discarded the sordid materialism of the life on earth when he produced the class cash box full of— Jimmy ' s tears. A four dollar bill had insidiously escaped. Doctor Dick had it by mistake. After that Jimmy solaced his soul with diseases, and dissertated at length upon, How to produce peristaltic movements in a Brachiopod. But from every page, the vagarious imagination which has conceived the drawings in this book caught a new disease. He had symptoms of every disease in Babbitt ' s lightning medical department. Not rarely Jimmy caught grip, lumbago and sore throat all at once. These were only minor matters, and could be easily enjoyed together. Appendicitis was only a mere matter of conventionality to Jimmy. Germs thrive in his sensitive nature, and Jimmy is only happy when he ' s got some- thing. The malicious ailments of the physical system he combats enthusiastically, waging the war of profound erudition in Science and consuming bucketsful of Listerine, Spanish Water, Hunyadi Jj - and Pond ' s Extract. Jim- my is a loveable non-con- , tagious disease. Fate beckoned to Jim- - ' iy i rf my when he took up the crayon while the wound was healing. From now on he is an artist. No longer does Zar- zyckki ' s. Allegretto graziozo (quasi andantes) pipe forth from the sweetly mouthed harmonica. Away went Sho-pang and Mot-zart. The new symptom is an art germ — a real, real germ this time. This is a picture of Jimmy drawn by himself in his happiest and most characteristic pose. 68 DANIEL BURGHARD BOYER. Buz! quoth the Blue-fly. Hum ! quoth the Bee. Dan is our indefatigable, unstoppable, unreplyable fifty mowing machine power soliloquizer. If any one bobs up with a re- mark or a reply while he is in full blast he can take it out in bobbing, for Dan goes as calmly on as a buz-saw. If you have a guilty conscience or for any other reason fear to die, engage Dan in a con- versation. For after fifteen minutes of it you will find yourself quite reconciled with the grave, for there the wordy cease from troubling, there the wordy be at rest. He will argue with you for a week on the probability that it will rain tomorrow, and there are more headings and footings to his discourse than there are bees in a hive And should you, in an unexpected moment of silence, endeavor to tell Dan a story, you tell it as to one in a dream, for when you are through he blinks and says, How ' s that? And be it ever so long, you must needs repeat it once more, if you desire to live out the rest of your days in peace. In view of the fact that Dan first arrived here as a Sophomore, it is supposed that he is trying to make up a year ' s loss of conversational opportunity; but he is already twenty-nine years ahead of the most fluent of us, and still gaining. There is nothing fit to say about Dan as a chess player, for when one has endured his Fabian policy in a game of seven hours duration, one has exhausted all decent English speech on the subject, and is only attempted to lapse into vituperation and abuse. 69 JOHN SAEGER BRADWAY. Not a cur wags his tail but I sigh out a passion. Don Juan is John ' s favorite character in literature, but alas ' tis the desire of the moth for the star. No, John, ' tis better as it is, that you should shrink and cringe and agonize before your favorite Bellonas. You could never have the heart to tor- ture them as they torture you. John ' s trips to Bryn Mawr grew from monthly to weekly and from weekly to daily. No occasion for fussing is lost by this our Orlando Furioso. Perhaps the most eventful night of his life was that when he joined the Barefoot Band. Just imagine the modest John, clothed in blushes and a bathrobe daintly treading the Bryn Mawr pavements by the light of the midnight moon. And picture if you can the consternation of the pampered Amazons of our distant cousin institution of learning, some of whom were returning from the opera, for surely no opera ever presented a figure so uncanny, so weird, so ghoulish as was that stalking apparition. The gentle passion has led John to the Joseph Sturgis mission every Sunday morning, racing for the 7.53 with a sandwich in one hand and an orange in the other. For John is a modern lover. He may be fond but he is not pale and wan. Avaunt ye visionary fiends That write upon a curl. The modern man is through with you; He wants the modern girl. That is the way Jack himself express- es it. He has also been the disturbing element among the Wednesday after- noon orators. His lively imagination leads him into the most bizarre vagaries, while his puns are both puny and punk. Puzzle Picture. Find John, find Pembroke, find John ' s bouquet. Why? 70 JAMES ALEXANDER CLARKE, Jr. Towse is noted for his never failing good humor. It is really a trait scarcely human. However, it was not this but his long pedal extremities and prehensile ap- pendages which called his genus into question and cast a cloud over his first few months in college. Led astray by the wonderful development of his knees, elbows, and heels, immediately upon his arrival he was dubbed Spider Clarke. It took the noted scientists Price and Winslow to point out that the spider is a hexapod, whereas the so-called Spider exhibited only four pedal extremities. Still the mystery was as baffling as ever. At this point our scientists formulated a system of psychological problems to test the subject ' s mental process. The reply to the Desert Island Problem ' ' was a leer so inhuman that Genus Homo was banished without any further consideration, and all the indicators on the delicate apparatus pointed toward the word Canis. From that time on Spider became Towser and ever will be Towser. And now. my pretty maids, who are meditating matri- mony, do not be frightened away by Towse ' s lascivious leer. He is a rose, a hot house plant trained to twine himself around his penates. Remember the injunction of the poet: Gather ye rosebuds while you may, ' for Towse will make a model husband. His slipper will not wait on the hearth-stone for him in vain while he is spending a wild evening with the boys at the club. In short, Towse has never spent a night away from his domicile. Once when we hid his clothes and threat- ened to keep him at college all night he whined for a solid hour I bet Ma ' s throwing a fit: I bet a dog biscuit Pa ' ll be down on the next train. Finally we had to let him go to prevent an attack of rabies. Judge from this, sweet ladies, and, if you wish a home-bred, domestic lord, who will charge, heel, fetch or carry, do not pass by Towser Clarke, our silver throated orator. 71 JEFFERSON HAMER CLARK. A human smoke stack in a rakish pair of pumps half asleep in a Morris chair. Having entered this Quaker Arcadia in his youth, Jeff soon put away childish things, and became a blase, blasted, belliferous and fumitorious Gambolier. Distinguished for the spirit in which he has discharged his Banner Committee duties — discharged them, as well as Auditor for Wadaworth ' s books. Jeff is the supreme Wogglebugger, possessing one qualification for this type of athlete — humor. As quarterback for the victorious senior Foot ball bugs, he invented such signals as Oscar Chase Martha Smith right between the legs of Alexander Guy Holborn Spiers. Thus he led the Woggle bugs on to victory with his mystic numbers. If Ezra had been here, Jeff would certainly have invented some dirty trick in order to furnish inspiration. An attachment to the Literary Genius (whose picture does not appear because it ' s one of his little eccentricities never to have one taken,) argues that Jeff must be a man of profound feeling, insight, and poetic imagination. Gee, ain ' t it hot! Ain ' t I class? and Geist! Geist! are the most intellectual remarks of which he has thus far been delivered. But the association of Genius proves to our shallow power of ordinary thought that somewhere in his infinite depths Jeff has a soul. 72 PHILIP BERNARD DEANE To lyven in delit wasevere his wone. For he was Epicurus ' oume sone. That held opinioun that pleyn delit Was verraily felicitee par it. Sejanus ' record is two teas, two dinners and a dance the same day. As a connoisseur of ' eats and a collector of cigars ( I know the brand; they ' re two for a quarter ) he is unequaled. He some- times consents to sleep in Merion but is never reduced to Founders for dinner. Early in his career he formed the nucleus of that body which afterward became the P. B. Deane Marching Club. This famous octumvirate ruled politics with a rod of iron until it went to wreck on the reserved seats of the Junior Operetta. Phil has organized the only rival of Bill Hartshorne ' s Bryn Mawr Brigade. He his been assiduous in leading off his Ardmore Squad like Moses starting for the promised land. Phil has always been an all-around ath- lete, but his social duties have interfered with any noticeable culmina- tions. Phil has also flirted with the Y. M. C. A., holding the treasurer ' s keys and guiding one delegation to Northfield. Perhaps no mortal ever before reached so masterly a perfection in the art of bluffing as he. Why even bluffs himself! He will really never fulfill his calling until he appears some day on the witness-stand with the words Why, you see, I don ' t remember exactly how that did happen. 73 JOHN DOWNING. A Man ofsorroivs and acquainted with Bill Hartshorne. The mud flats of the Christeen, the monastery of Westtown and the Chester Valley have known this youth in the respective though ever apologetic roles of Isaac Walton, Saint Benedict and bashful Romeo. He has lived three years with Bill, not without strife and sundry family jars, but always resisting the pressing invitation to join the Bryn Mawr Brigade as Bill ' s trusted lieutenant, for which he has laid up reward for himself not only here, but also, we may venture, in Heaven. Many are the reasons which have been advanced to explain John ' s perpetual sorrow. Some say it is the present high standard necessary for a gentle- man to maintain a family ; others, the care of the chemistry lab., and many offer only the monosyllable, Bill. But all agree that his sorrow ' s crown of sorrow is the remembrance of his brother Tom ' s brother Neppie ' s brother Pivot ' s brother John. For he flings his whole soul into his Apologia pro Vita Sua. If you kicked him he would apologize for being at the end of your foot. But, when you know him (and we mean this) there is no one with a more heartly handclasp, no one more ready to laugh at your merry jest, or grieve with you at your tale of woe. Microcosmos. 74 BENJAMIN FARQUHAR. At Haverford, Farquhar has annexed the name of Fat { probably because he smokes MakaroflF. ) He is a fast man at table, eating or cards-better perhaps at eating, for he consumes the indigestibles until his belt gradually bursts above the horizon. A capacity for food, cards and cigarettes is only exceeded by his capacity for enthusiasm over The Pink Lady—or some Phila- ilelphia production which opens to him an opportunity for real Eastern culture. An apostle of the gay white way, including all the shows in town and no peanut seats, thanks. What life he misses at Haver- ford he finds more manifold in town, and what the town lacks comes in the daily letter from the fair Buckeye co-ed. All this he generously shares in more material form, for the corridor gets from Fat a new vision of Life every week. A half hour ' s inspiration on Conscience or A Permanent Tariff Board will produce a thesis— true scintillation of genuis. To complete the cultural studies he makes an inquiry into the standing of the Athletics, or the latest type of Torpedo Fore-Door-Sixes. 75 HENRY FERRIS, JR. There is no fellow in the world with better intentions than Henry. He rushes up to this one and then that one and with an imploring look cries, Lord what must I do to be saved ? But don ' t for a minute think that Hen really intends to follow your advice. It is just his way of bestowing a delicate compliment on his patrons. For never was there anyone more assidious in asking advice nor more scrupulous in disregarding it. Hen is a man of hobbies. For awhile he held such of us as were unfortunate enough to fall into his clutches charmed by his brillant discussion of automobiles. The silver cord was loosed, when Hen operated on Doc. Babbitt ' s car and made a stationary engine of it with almost fatal results. Hen. has spent hours explaining how it wasn ' t his fault since he quitted autos and devoted his attention to the shops and laboratories. Here his investigative curiosity spoiled more tools and ruined more work than a month of Sunday ' s could repair. But it is at the ball and in the drawing-room where Hen really shines with the brilliance of a Tungs- ten 32 candle power. For he can dance the Boston on a ten cent piece, sing a roundelay in the moonlight to the accompaniment of his lute to a damsel or a cow with equal passion, make love in French to a doting spinister, or dash off an ode to his Orient brother, the poet Omar, with equal facility and gusto. Henry has been invaluable to the college. He is a human barometer. Every time a change is imminent Henry notifies the college by a corresponding change in his flannels. This has been such a useful guide to the college as a whole, that Henry ' s fame has spread throughout the outlying districts. It is by no means unusual for an over an.xious female as far distant as German- town to call up Henry on the phone and inquire after the status of his small clothes in order to ascertain the threatening nature of the coming weather. 76 THOMAS FREDERIC HADLEY. The man with the original Billy Comfort Sniff. This is the only sign of animation he displays except that he is observed to walk noiselessly in and out at meals. Several weeks ' investigation gives no clue except that he eats and sleeps like all other animals, and employs the sign language wherever possible. Under intense provocation he once said Blast it! and subsided for thirteen days. He is therefore suspected of being an apostle of Stoicism, as he is apparently undisturbed by noises, skeeters or other insects. He was once caught in the act of laying a nickle on a newscounter and picking up TTie Saturday Evening Post, and it was inferred that he bought it. Later he was observed reading, beginning with the advertise- ments, and reading through to the joke column without a change of countenance. At times he disappears mysteriously, and is sus- pected of holding clandestine nubbings with some breath of inspiration from Kansas. His past is hope- lessly mixed up with oratory, newspapers and history, and there can be no mistake in the assumption that there ' s also a woman in it. 77 WILLIAM HARTSHORNE. — BiLLUM — And had he been a dog that should have howled thus, they would have hanged him; and I pray God his bad voice bode no mischief. I had as lief heard the night raven, come what plague could come after it. As Bill says, he is the all-round atheletic of the class. With the exception of Gym. (and what one of us has won distinction there ?) Bill has been at the scratch in every athletic event perpetrated during his college career. But his future fame will be won before the foot- lights of the Grand Opera stage. For he has a voice like the squeezing of a lemon, like the playful bleatings of a cart wheel as it lovingly caresses the unanointed axle. I care not, says the poet, who makes the nation ' s laws, if only I may write its songs. But if Bill is going to sing the songs, for Belshazzer ' s sake let me make the laws. If anyone believes that these things are exaggerated, let him come to the third floor of Merion Cottage, where Bill has staked out his claim, and see how the ceiling has shed its plaster, how the doors are gaping what did Billum see? from the very reverberation of even such simple little songs as Annie Laurie, or Every Little Movement has a Meaning of its Own. As a dispenser of the Bryn Mawr patronage, he acknowledges no peer. Several times a week he leads his faithful band of henchmen up the Appian Way to our neighboring institution of learn- ing, puts them through their pretty little parlor tricks for the edification of the fair ones of that hot-bed of Suffragism, and brings them home again unscathed. Bill rooms with John, or, perhaps, John rooms with Bill; an interesting combination from whichever standpoint it is viewed. 78 DAVID S. HINSHAW. — Dave — Dave is a mixture of Kan-ias oratory and Nebraska politics. His worship of the almighty goddess Public Sentiment has become proverbial. Crystallizing, fulminating, obfusticating, our Peerless One, our silver Tongued Orator has outshined the in- formal prestige of the Hon. Jas. A Babbitt until the latter is but as sounding brass and a tinkling cymbal. To guide Public Sentiment appeared that universal friend of men and angels, a monument of editorial genius, of politics, and social instinct. Davie ' s pride in this, his tirstboin, is touching; but his joy in fatherhood is marred by one fly; the little prodigy will split its infinitives. Since the first days of budding greenness, Dave has ever been a leader, skirmishing in the van, making peace with the enemy with all the dignity of a Pope. Well may he say: Pars magna fui. Is it constitutions? The Y. M. C. A., the Student Council, the Athletic Association, the Athletic Council sprang all full-armed from his teeming brain. Yet has not Dave been without the martyr ' s crown Cox of Lehigh, and the Rutgers game left their wounds, poor dumb mouths to speak for him. Scarred doors and crippled chairs are mute witnesses. Some day when Dave is Senator from Kansas, he will look back with a smile to the time when his Gospel of the Dress Suit was despised and rejected of men. and will magnanim- ously bestow on our degenerate suc- cessors a marble infirmary for football heroes and for the files of the Weekly. The aidil Hand. ■79 RICHARD JUNIUS MENDENHALL HOBBS. The languor of the South in a dry. broad, pleasant face, and the Naw ' th C ' lina drawl which breaks through a sunny smile- all this is something new in Half Breeds. He usually reckons that you all will do thus and so in a tone that convinces you that you will make him perfectly comfortable no matter whether you do it here now. or in summer- time or in Philadelphia, He is said however to display a reasonable amount of definiteness in his dissertations on Five Hundred or The Industrial Negro. Deacon .Jones recommends this specimen as antidote for strife ache, and feels it rather consoling to watch Hobbs flick imaginary lint from his white ducks, and to hear his minor cadences on his High Chief Mogulship at a college of fifteen— a college far away among the pines on a mountain side in the wilds of Naw ' th C ' lina, where they sell corn bread and pork fat by the week, and where the chief diverson is dodging feudalistic bullets and drinking Moonshine. Dick swears he can tell the difl ' erence between Duffy ' s Best and Mountain Dew. and no sugar and water. thanks. An apparent inertia masks the makings of a Southern Cavalier, and his regular trips to Camden are thought to betoken there a Jersey trust in Moonshine or a partnership for two. Mooiishine. LeROY JONES. For every hair missing on this sparse head. Deacon has accumulated an idea. Someone has suggested that the possibilities for further ideas are limited under this assertion. But probably Deacon has bought with one of the missing hairs, an idea on capilli-culture. If not, Wadsworth can give him profes.sional advice, and Ed. Levin can give Deacon a sample of any tonic he asks for. Deacon was born in Iowa, Nebraska or Wyoming, but that was years and years ago, and the detail is insignificant. The important thing to know is that it does not require any friction on the bald spot to work up Deac ' s western enthusiasm. Womans ' Suffrage. Prohibition, Co-education, Historical Philadelphia,— these are only a few of his more recent t hrills. Deacon makes the encyclopedia look like a Leary ' s second-hand ten-center. Deacon ' s bed-fellows say that he has a hasty, whole-souled disposition, and an exhuberance that gives to his life a touch of the romantic. Close observa- tion, however, enables us to assure our friends that Deac could hardly be said to estimate life in terms of passion. At Haverford he is easily distinguished by his broad-rimmed cowljoy hat, which not only betrays his sectional pride, but frequently calls forth remarks of enticing pleasantry north of Eighth and Market. Next year Deacon will be back in the land that makes your blood run wild. Caicboy Jones. 81 EDWIN R. LEVIN. This is a picture of Eddie, our Lloyd Hall Hermit. He is either grumbling or asleep. Occasionally he crawls out of his recluse and comes over to the dining room to find something new to growl at. Grouch is his middle name. But he is only grouchy to the people he likes. He does not like football referees. Come on, what fell are ye givin ' us. Git a rule book, and next to playing football he loves to argue with the officials. He is the original cosmetic kid. On shaving he first applies cold cream, then a little violet water, then the newest brand of Colgate ' s soap after shaving, a little massage, including 57 varieties of Ed Pinaud. Pompeian, crude oil and vaseline. This he finishes off with gasolene, turpentine, more violet water, a little honey and almond, some Elcaya, witch hazel, bay rum, lemon juice, 3 maraschino cherries, and a touch of Jace povdre especially imported from Cherbourg. Thus his appearance on Walton Field is usually preceded by a heavenly luxury of odors which chase each other around on different currents of air, and give the oriental atmosphere of a Manayunk barber shop. Usually, however, Eddie is lost in the mazes Philadelphia, eluding the collectors of Baily, Banks and Biddle, and indulging in an occasional dinner with a lady who has a fancy for diamond bracelets. Eddie loves to be miserable and he has a good time. He comes to college for the purpose of finding unpleasant companions and unpleasant things to eat. And he finds much to growl at. The Hermit. 82 HOWARD FRANKLIN McKAY. O. so you don ' t think Harmon is the Biggest Man i that Ohio can hold her own against all comers? And (Cate-Syndieate: one who holds all the cards) thinks Socialistic method of teaching, with a profound respect interests, down pat. Once wind him up, and he deals out a dry, delicate humor that is very elusive, and when found leaves a doubt whether the thing has stung or tickled: nothing bizarre, however, oh no! Mere literary study far fails to content him for a thesis. He must needs delve into the depths of Gnosti- cism with its Eschotological Gnosis and Syncretistic Religion. His emanations, even in his sleep, have the prognostications of the Patient Philosopher with his problem of the Last Analysis of the Ultimate, all tongue-tied. All this is ably fitting him for his chosen profession and to find a more worthy preacher, will call for wide search. Apologetically he takes over the gains of the advantage he wins from his victims in chance or logic. Tender in years anti heart, docile in mind and disposition, he is trusting certain Ohio corres- pondence courses and time to make a man of him. This picture shows how Mac felt in Tib ' s dress suit. n the Democratic Party ' . ' And the tone shows what Gate, of the situation. He has the for himself, his views, and his , ' Prom Ohio. 83 JESSE KERSEY PATRICK. What! Sholde he studie and make hymselven wood ? —Chaucer. A nocturnal animal that prowls by night and sleeps by day. It is never too late to go to bed, always too early to get up. Is he not ashamed of lying abed? Yes, but it far pleasanter to be ashamed than to get up — and anyhow Martha Smith never serves lobster salad for breakfast. P Hk| Pat is our supreme artist in the manipulation of Oscar ' s cut book. His furious This is a ■ mistake erects Oscar ' s side whiskers until that kind bachelor misses the pitch in his voice and ' p shakes in abject fear, as he tremblingly double crosses cuts at Pat ' s dictation. The double cross is his bequest to future generations, an invention all his own, a magic mystery bestowing abound- ' ing grace and salvation on the sinner. He exerts the same psychic influ- ence over Dr. Bolles, who gives Patrick his only A for listening to the story of What lettuce is good for. No e.x- planation of these phenomena is satis- factory. Our best suggestion is that Pat ' s neckties perform the Eusapia Pal- ladino act on Oscar and the good Doctor — on neckwear these two color-blind gentlemen are known to be finicky. There is no use of hanging on to your money, says Patrick, it will only get rusty. This inclination to be rid of sordid earthly currency often results in his missing the owl train from Broad Street, which he enjoys so much that the Pennsylvania Railroad seriously considered keeping a bed for him at the head of the stairs. This plan was abol- ished, not because there was any fear that Pat might wake up, but he has a habit of running for a shower bath attired in a derby. _ l ' S€ ' I ' Attired in a derby. 84 LEVI ARNOLD POST — Arnold — He was in logic a great critic Profoundly skilled in analytic; Besides, ' tis known he could speak Greek As naturally as pigs squeak; That Latin was no more difficile Than ti a blackbird ' tis to whistle. In Freshman year Arnold was considered hopelessly rural, —his broad felt hat, the straws which he always chewing, and his habit of getting up at four in the morning. But it was remarkable how quickly he gave up these agricultural attributes, and by Senior year he was as polished a man of the world as you could find in many a long day ' s journey. His accomplishments in the language line have been hinted at in the above poetical extract, but it can only convey a slight idea of his gift of tongues. While sojourning in the rural districts near Reading he was charmed to find that many of the innabitants spoke fine Castillian Spanish, but was soon convinced of his error. He is one of the staunchest members of the Barefoot Brigade, but his chiefest fame has been won as chronicler of the Altrui.st Club, that famous triumvirate which arose in glory after the decline and fall of the Roman Empire of Sejanus. Here his influence has been of great weight. Let none suppose that his influence has ever been for sanity, for Dave ' s shattered doors and tw isted chairs can tell a different tale. Once in a fit of depression Arnold wrote an essay called Where Art Thou, Love in which he bemoaned his state of single blessedness. If this should chance to catch the eye of any mobile maiden meditating matrimony, let us hope she will act on the suggestion, and make him a captive with her charms. Orthodox 85 JOSEPH HAINES PRICE — Jay— There comes Joseph Haines, and, as he draws near. You find that ' s a smile that you took far a sneer. One half of him contradicts t ' other; his wont Is to say very sharp things and do very blunt. His manner ' s as hard as his feelings are tender And a sortie he ' ll make when he means to surrender. He ' s in joke half the time when he seems to he sternest ; When he seems to be joking, he may be in earnest. Builds his friendships of steel and his dislikes of oak : Loves a prejudice better than aught but a joke, Is half upright Quaker, half downright Come-outer ; Loves freedom too tvell to go sta7-k mad about her. And though not a poet, yet all must admire. In the stuff he has written his skill on the Liar. Jay ' s room is as wonderful as Romeo ' s drugstore. Blunderbusses, Russian sabres, chairs tremulous with years, collect a golden halo of dust and legend, and the quaintest of them all is Jay himself. His fame is largely as a founder of the Altruist Club. Before the fireplace he crouches in his cutaway coat, clinching his corn-col i pipe, surrounded by a mass of literary impedimenta, making fierce onslaughts as the spirit moves him, upon the quiescent embers or the lagging conversation, and either he stirs into blazing life. Another picture that will not soon be forgotten is as leader of the Barefoot Band. When the voice of the turtle is heard in the land, just as sure a harbinger of spring is the company to be seen travelling by moonlight along Lancaster Pike from one to three in the morning. Shoes and coats are taboo except pendant a tergo. Notice his grouch. He is said to get the same results with one face asCerebus with three. He has latterly begun making an asset of his eccentricities by a sudden acquisition of literary fame. The Cheerful Liar appeared December 10, 1910. Alumni sent messages of congratulation or horror. Some pointed with pride, others viewed with alarm. Jay, calm through it all, is soon to be invested with the fallen mantel of Hankey and the licking of the literary cubs. An Antique 86 DAVID DUER REYNOLDS The idol of Kennet Square, hero of the town history. This reputation is baspd upon his development of Roy Mercer as an athlete, and in fact the town records show that Diddler ran the hundred, the two-twenty, the quarter, the mile and the two mile before Mercer wore long trousers— and wo n them all. If Duer hasn ' t got the kind of athletic story you want, he will extemporize you one to order— how he pitched the nineteen inning no-hit game, and ended it by knocking a home run with four men on bases, or how he umped 24 feet and came to Haverford a world-beater. There can be no doubt but that lie jumped 30 feet, the only question being whose feet? All skepticism about Duer ' s athletics vanish however, wnen he tackles rocky mountain goats on Walton Field, only to be awarded imaginary prize cups for all his faith, hope and charity. He loves to read the newspaper articles about the doughty little red-headed quarter-back. In a fat pocket- book he carries with him the clippings of his glorious deeds how he tackled incessantly and how the plucky little scrub captain did shine thus and so. And though his cranium could not be cracked with a pile driver his subtle mind has quivered into such immortal lines as ' ' Poe is a bubble floating down the stream f time, ever floating, ever bubbling. Poe is I ' oe and always will be Poe and never will be anything but Poe. He feels the same way about Bayard Taylor. The real tragedy of Duer ' s life came when he and Ruhe Williams went to New York. His only words on his return are still on record. Mein Gott, how the money did fly, here I was in New York four days and I spent three dollars and a half. I like Kennett Square better, for there is always some- thing going on there. ' Since those melancholy days he cheers his skeptic soul with smoke. Smoke is his vocation, although he possesses neilher tobacco, cigarettes, or even a match, nothing in fact but the habit. Smoke is his elusive philosophy, pool his religion, Mercer his unmoved mover, Kennet his heart ' s home. 87 Say there, St. Peter — gat the niahius? VICTOR SCHOEPPERLE -Vic - Vic arrived among us soon after the Sophomore year began. He came from Harvard not in utter nakedness but traiUng clouds of glory. His assimilation has been very gradual. Even as class president he hardly felt inclined to share the pains and the pleasures of all our vagaries. A critic par excellence, his artistic conscience never fails to work. He was formerly known as a pure esthete, a supramundane sybarite whose very hair and figure breathed artistic personality. Since however his visits to New York became more frequent, he has displayed a deep interest in the evolutions of the tinkling dollar. He is gifted with a double character that enables him to play the grind by day, and by night to join the ranks of the hilarious Bacchantes. It is this duplicity, coupled with an ability to accomplish work, that has made him a universal favorite, a rara avis indeed. It was by his breezy editing of the Middle Barclay Squirt that he first attained to prominence. He was later trusted with the Haverfordian for which he has always zealously labored. The e.xpiration of his editorship was easily remedied, for that thrilling serial. The Moth and the Candle, threatens to make Vic a contributor to the magazine world without end. He has numerous eccentricities just like all literary people, but he subordinates them fairly successfully to the general welfare. His favorite author was once Omar Khayyam, but Schopenhauer has recently forged ahead. Vic will lead a stormy life until he eventu- ally attains to the calm insight of the seer. LUCIUS ROGERS SHERO — Lucios— At church with meek and unaffected grace His looks adorn the venerable place. ' ' S ince Lucius was made a pillar in the house of Jarden at Preston, his music, yearning like a god in pain, has been the awe of the pious and the joy of the ungodly. From the time Lucius grabs the rear railing of the 7:53 Sunday morning until he returns from escorting some timid maid through the dim alleys of Preston late that evening, there is no rest for the wicked, as Lucius sings his psalms and ejaculates his fervid orations. The class of 1911 unanimously look to him to slip us past St. Peter, hoping that the splendor of his holiness may lead the saint to overlook certain not impeccable traits of the rest of us. Rumor has it that Lucius keeps in his closet a halo which he rubs up once a month wi th Pearline. Immaculate in the eyes of our once Pistor and of our present Henry Joel, his cheeks bloom with modesty. He is our one purely esthetic exponent of the Hancockian gesture. His decisive ands and buts, his rumbulous renditions of Altera iam teritur and A rose on the top of a can would make the most sophisticated peer up the fireplace ' or into the closet. There is however a nocturnal :is|.crt to Lucius ' nature unknown to many but ncvir to be forgotten by our Henry, who nearly laught his death-o ' -eold answering Lucius ' insist- ent telephoning. No moonlight meeting of the Barefoot Band is considered complete without him. and he was long to the Freshmen an embodiment of the thunder of Jupiter and the terror that flieth by night. His true genius never came to light until he took the presidency of the Society for the Perpetration of Cruelty to Music. Here, surrounded by dilettanti, virtuosi, gesticulating, vociferating, he ' Rides in the whirlwind and directs the storm. ' I ' rnfundis EBENEZER HALL SPENCER am Sir Oracle! When I ope my lips let no dog bark. In addition to the belt which he won as Champion Fence Vaulter, Eben is further distinguished by the title of Chief Calamity Howler to the Class. We, that is to say, you and I, or the Class, or the College, or the Body Politic, are drifting through the rapids. The whirlpools are whirling about us, the water- falls are ahead, the anchors have gone by the board and there is not an isle of safety in sight. He takes upon himself the burden of our woes, in him are our sorrows to be found, our grief, our care, our toil. And should you in a moment of optimism endeavor to convince him that some- where behind the clouds the sun is still shining, you will be transfi.xed with a look of martyrdom which will remind you not only of Saint Stephen as he was being stoned, but also of your own painful lack of sense. If he should speak, it is with an air which combines the authority of the Apocalypse with the pessimism of the Book of Job. There is not one of us so fortunate as to have escaped the ban of his contempt. His bump of humor is a dent ; in the typical English fashion he laughs at a good joke, if he laughs at all, some seven hours after he hears it. Our English Novelty 90 at college. HENRY BERNARD STUCCATOR There is a veil of mystery which casts a romantic halo around the personality of Henry Stuccator. He has never roomed For days and weeks he disappears only in the course of time to show again his smiling countenance amon g the the circle of materialists in Dolly Barret ' s Economic Classes. How he avoids the penalties of over-cutting would alone be enough to gain him a lasting reputation ; but the sphinx-like manner in which he keeps his secrets has shed a legion of chimerical legends around him. Even the least gullible of us are ready to think him an enchanted prince of Candy, the favorite son of the Caliph of Bagdad, or a Pinkerton detective getting a line on college men and manners. Many of us would do well to follow his example of judicious silence : for a pea-nut head will be credited with the wisdom of Solomon, if be but hold his peace. As the wise old sage expresses it : A fool uttereth all his mind: but a wise man keepeth it in until afterward. All we know definitely about Stuck is that he has taken all the economics given and is still alive. This alone shows that he was moulded from rare clay— the stuff from which are our heroes. Henry George, Adam Smith and Eugene V. Debs are all reincarnated in Stuck. He has a social bee in his bonnet, and sumetimes mentions slum work among boys. We have our suspicions that his interest doesn ' t stop with the boys— but that is neither here nor there. Stuck has the reputation of knowing the secret doings of the denizens of every hugger-mugger, alley and court in Philadelphia. We believe that he could tell us many interesting things about our city ; but that is just our notion. So great a reputation for wisdom does silence win for itself ! Neither here nor there 91 HOWARD GARDINER TAYLOR When Howard blew into College from Fish House, his ancestral estate, he was a paragon of virtue. He steadfastly held to the straight and narrow path in spite of all the alluring temptations of our roaring, rakish under-class days. It was not until the middle of Junior year that Howard fell from his pinnacle. The occasion was the famous barefoot walk. Before he had passed the first mile-stone, he had yielded to the voluptuous charms of Tiger and had assumed as nonchalant an air as Duke Reynolds, an old-time votary. Little acorns to mighty oak trees grow. In a short time Howard could be seen at any hour of the day with his corn-cob between his teeth enjoying a dry smoke. From this time on his decline was rapid and soon he began to assume liberties with his vernacular over the vexatious game of double Canfield. But his fall from the grace of the saints has been attended by a corresponding gain of favor in the eyes of the fair. His efforts in this field have been so successful that he has carried his conquests into the neighboring states. Howard has won the citadel of our hearts thru ' the medium of our stomachs. Who of us will not always remember with pleasure those apples that grow on his estate in Jersey ? He has determined to grow apples for a vocation. Some of us did not fully appreciate the wisdom of his choice] until he disclosed, while talking in hisf sleep, the secret that was burning a hole in his brain. He has invented a method of packing, whereby he gains a peck in each barrel. Lucky boy, his — r-_ ___r fortune is assured ! Because he elected all of Dr. BoUes ' courses, the rumor spread that Howard was the original for the hero of the drama, The Easiest Way. Howard wishes to make use of this publication to inform the community of the fallacy of this report, and that he is the hardest student that has come to us of late years from Friends ' Select. 92 J. WALTER TEBBETTS Tib is our turbine vacillator. Seven months vacillating has decided him to join Nineteen Eleven and help pay the bills. And for this reason we are glad to have him. Tib ' s conjunct self is a series of antenomes which are entirely apodictic. This is Rufus I H Jones ' way of saying that you cant tell what he ' s going to do ne.xt. H 1 He is quite some little bit of society man when a Dress Suit is the proper thing. He almost embarrassed himself by appearing with McKay— McKay at a full dress, wearing a Kansas cut sack ! What followed ' ? Clear the court ! Clear the court ! The universal paradox is illustrated in this Quaker preacher ' s son And like a good preacher s son, he was eager, intensely eager, to see The Queen of Chinatown. She was scheduled to ap- pear at 17th and Columbia. Poor girl, she must have swallowed a snake by accident. It was rather hard on Tib. There is a real vacillating valve on Tib ' s head, where a beam hit him once, he says, and knocked him silly. He is thought by some not to have alto- gether recovered. This would at least account for .some of his illusions about his cutaneous afflictions. FREDERICK OSCAR TOSTENSON ■• ■ the devil ever takes good shape, behold, his picture! From a very Joseph Andrews of a militant Westtown Prude, Fred has become one of the keenest appreciators of a well flavored story that we have in our midst. He kept himself pure and unspotted from the world through Freshman year, but with the first pin-feathers of Sophomoredom he threw modes ty to the winds and bought him his first derby hat. His chief claim to literary fame is the fact that he is press agent for Reynolds Racy Rimes, Ridoles and Romances, and has written a spicy review on Price and Winslow ' s immortal work, The Immorality of the Ages. Fred has never been known to win a game of Five Hundred or decline a moonlight walk to Valley Purge. Through his efforts the hilly trinity has become a little mure godless and worldly ; Lucius and Jack Bradway, the two other members of that worthy sect, led liy his example, have renounced a shadow of their piety, and in moments of extreme provocation they may now be heard to say damn — not, however, without blushing. In Sophomore year Fred was much troubled by living next door to Jay Price, who would insist on talking to somebody or himself after nine p. twang and Mephistophelian chuckle may be heard at am time or in any place. The left hook- Bui now Fred ' s loway 94 CHARLES WADSWORTH, 3rd — Waudy — ' Vociferated logic kills me quite, The noisy man is always in the right, The conscientious biograplier must needs have as many hands as Briareus in order to jot down all the salient details of Waddy ' s life as we have heard them from his own sweet lips. No matter how simple the task, be it only to take a letter to the Post Office, or to scrape off the courts, he will find more difficulties to overcome, more stiles to climb, so to speak, or more barb-wire fences to crawl through, than the number of potato bugs which Howard Taylor could cull on the longest day in June. Perhaps it need not be said that in overcoming these difficulties Waddy adds a few extra jewels to his crown of glory ; which crown, we may add, is never suffered to rust and tarnish hidden away from human view. He came with us while yet a child, and although he has put away a number of childish things, he still speaks as a child. His philosophical arguments sound very imposing when heard at a distance of half a mile, on close inspection ■ - - . ■ ' •- ' — it will be found that they are but words, and often cuss words at that. In summer time- he frequents the fashionable watering place, Magnolia, and astonishes the natives there with the prodigality of his Fourth of July display and his unique and unlimited collection of flannel trousers. As a member of the Atruist Club he has won distinction for his dissertations on the whatsoever. It is generally supposed that Waddy has formed a heart ' s attachment with a young lady who at present resides at a distance. This necessitates an exchange of heart beats by means of the U. S. Mail, an exchange which often involves complications. G • C«.i 1lN« ( Co- C 95 CALEB WINSLOW — Cale- 0 Jerusalem, Jerusalem ! Like the man that President Sharpless tells about, Cale has three hands :— right hand, left hand and always a little behind hand. Peace ! Montague, cease that ribald laughter while Cale and Jay Price argue about the last Welshman who was drowned while swimming across the Brandywine ! For there is nothing that delights Cale more than to entrench himself in some indefensible argumentative position and defend it against all comers until the sun grows cold and the leaves of the judgement books unfold. An argument is the only thing which will stir him from that meditative calmness of mind which is often so intense that he frequently fails to ob- serve the Flight of Time. Many a time and oft has he strolled into Monday morning Latin Class on the following Wednesday afternoon, or gone up to breakfast in time for five o ' clock tea, or in time to dine on the following day. About the middle of Sophomore year Cale was just beginning to grasp the intricacies of his Freshman schedule. The professors do not very much mind his coming to classes on the following week, they are quite used to it, in fact but even four years of acquaintance with him cannot inure them to the shock of Cale ' s sneeze going off like a Presidential Salute of twenty-one guns. Cale has a taste for literature of a not too deep or too ethical a nature, and he and Jay are often seen poring over some dusty tome in the Library and culling therefrom a garland of purple patches with which they regale the boys at supper. He is rather fond of whatever good things that are afforded us in this Vale of Tears, and when he moved from Barclay to Merion he must perforce take along his Ostermoor mattress which he had cherished for three years,— for in the whole world there was not a more comfortable one to be found. 96 Schneider gets acquainted with Caleb ' s Ostermoor ALAN SEDGWICK YOUNG. — Alan— A tittle round fat oily man oj God Was one I chiefiy marked among the fry ; He had a roguish twinkle in his eye. And shone all glittering with ungodly dew. If (I tight damsel chaunced to trippen by. When Alan came to us he charmed our ears with a mighty voice that had a tendency to turn falsetto. He used to feel, as a Freshman, the true inconvenience of this impediment, for he has always maintained that without it no Sophomore would have noticed him. His prosperous management of the store in Sophomore year finally ushered him as popular candidate into the thesauratorial chair of the class, which, owing to constant trips about college in search of the impecunious Patrick, he has never yet had time to occupy in comfort. It was as a Junior that Alan burst into that silent sea— Bryn Mawr. Who can face a kodak unmoved? Yet as Alan pas-sed Merion Hall with at least ten thousand maidens gaping and five thousand .shutters clicking, he merely threw out his manly bosom, drew in his manly- bay-window, shall we say? — and stood unamazed; nay more, he was but slightly titillated by these delicate attentions. Alan has latterly been de- voting himself to the amelioration of the prole- tariat. His themes for English V., his speeches for English VI., his very contribu- tions to the lore of the sophisticated, have all reeked of Government Reports. His dramatic abilities have not been held in abeyance by the abolition of the .lunior play; in spite of the disappointment of those who had foreshadowed Alan as the one impeccable, unadulterated Hankey, yet have not Coopertown and Preston been dazzled by the magnificence of liutlyuingte the Beloved and by the executions ot Macnamara ' s Band? Alan as Wogglebug Center I leave to the courteous reader. Je ne puis plus. .g,„.„,. p ,,,,,,..,, 3,,, , „„ „„„y, 97 WILMER JOB YOUNG. He kneels at morn, at noon, at eve — He hath a cushion plump. Wilmer Job ' s piety has long been the wonder and admiration of the godless. He is even now passing through the processes of purification pending his canonization as a Qual er saint. But this has only been attained by great travail of soul. For a long time he offered lambs on the altars of two gods, David and Jehovah. For a long time it seemed that David had Jehovah lashed to the mast, but now the Kansas David shrinks his horn, for Job has stepped forth from these unhallowed shades, and now no longer waits for the Master to have a cold before he himself dares to sneeze. Before he was annointed with the oil of the Lord and elevated to the Papa! chair. Job enjoyed a modest jest as well as anyone, but now to mention Tom Jones or Master Francis Rabelais in his presence is enough to call down the Interdict on the entire college and set the lumbering machinery of the Star Chamber in motion. But once he divests himself of his ecclesiastical miter and cross and walks about among his fellow- men, he is beyond a doubt as genial and pleasant a companion as the most unrighteous of the goats of his flocks. He has one sterling quality, —in times of emergency he is not afraid to play the man, either on the soccer field or in defending his barricaded door against the midnight attacks of the iniquitous Altruist Club. This Record is far from being a laurel bush from which anyone miy pluck him- self a crown, but we feel that Wilmer deserves a more hearty praise for what he is, rather than what we pretend him to be — more than these foolish words of ours seem to allow. ' ' Up here, in this room up here. ' ' 98 ®I|? O tltpr Clasfifs JUNIOR CLASS Jmtuir Ollass Albert Lang Baily, Jr. JOFHUA LONGSTRETH BaILY, JR. Mark Balderston Stagey Kile Beebe Arthur Lindley Bowerman Paul Clisby Brewer, Jr. John Arthur Brownlee James McP ' adden Carpenter Joshua Alkan Cope Clyde Gowen Durgin J. Bennington Elfreth, Jr. Douglas Platt Falconer Ralph Lee Fansler Leslie Warren F erris Hans Froelk her, Jr. Horace Howson Lance Brenton Lathem William Evan Lewis Walter Wood Longstreth Herbert Mendenhall Lowry Charles Thompson Moon Robert Everts Miller Edward Imbrie Miller Sidney Sharp Morris David Golden Murray Eli Nichols John Hollowell P. rker iRviN Corson Foley John Daub Renninger Kenneth Andrew Rhoad William Hooten Roberts Leonard Ch. se Ritts Thomas Emlen Shipley Francis Gerow Smiley Lloyd Mellor Smith Walter Hopkins Steere Henry Malcolm Thomas. Jr. Edward Wallerstein, Jr. 1(11 SOPHOMORE CLASS n ibinnnrr dlasa Paul Gay Baker Joseph Moorhead Beatty, Jr. Charles Henry Crosman William Samuel Crowder Frederick Augustus Curtis Francis Harrar Diament Francis Mitchell Froelicher Philip Collins Gifford Arthur Herbert (Joddard NoRRis Folger Hall William Yarnall Hare Charles Elmer Hires, Jr. Richard Hovvson Elksha T. Kirk William Church Longstreth Walter Wood Longstreth Jesse Diverty Ludlam Stephen Warren Meader George Montgomery Edmund Richardson Maule Herbert Victor Nicholson Oliver Moore Porter William Richards Frederick Philip Stieff, Jr. Norman Henry Taylor Joseph Tatnall Lester Ralston Thomas John Valentine Van Sickle William Webb Charles O. Young 103 FRESHMAN CLASS iFrpfilimau (Elass Henry Ernest Bell Jules Silvanus Bentley Walter Gregory Bovverman Stewart Patterson Clarke George Valentine Downing Charles Willis Edgerton Alfred Walton Elkington Howard West Elkinton Thomas William Elkinton Joseph Cooper Ferguson Malcolm Ferris John Kittera Garrigues Morris White Gates Jesse Paul Green Gerhard Carl Heym Edward Morris Jones Benjamin Jones Lewis Leonard B. Lippman Robert Allison Locke Roy McFarlan Rowland Paul McKinley Harold Schaeffer Miller Percy Warren Moore Harry Offerman William Sheppard Patteson Roland Stanton Philips Edward Rice, Jr. Robert Groves Rogers Charles Russell Paul Hudson Sangree Richard J. Schoepperle Herbert Wetherill Seckel Robert Chapman Smith Francis Collins Stokes Samuel Emlen Stokes John Amos Stout Albert Mordecai Taylor Herbert William Taylor Kempton Potter Aikin Taylor Leonard Van Hoesen Thomas Douglas Waples William Henry Bacon Whitall 105 THE FACULTY Shr Jarultij President Isaac Sharpless, Sc.D., LL.D., L.H.D. Allen Clapp Thomas. A.M. Ly.man Beecher Hall. Ph.D. Francis Barton Gummere, Ph.D.. LL.D.. Litt.D. Henry Sherring Pratt, Ph.D. James Addison Babbitt, A.M.. M.D. Ri ' Fi ' s Matthew Jones, A.iL, Litt.D. OfCAR Marshall Chase, S.M. Albert Sidney Bolles, Ph.D.. LL.D. Don Carlos Barrett, Ph.D. Albert Elmer Hancock, Ph.D. Legh Wilber Reid, Ph.D. William Wilson Baker, Ph.D. Frederic Pal.mer, Jr.. A.M. Leon Hawley Rittenhouse, M.E. Richard Mott Gummere. Ph.D. Alexander Guy Holborn Spiers, Ph.D. Rayner Wickersham Kelsey. Ph.D. Clarence Elnathan Norris, A.M. Albert Harris Wilson, S.M. Henry Joel Cadbury, A.M. John Paul Givler. Ph.B. William Henry Collins, A.M. 107 HRESHMAX YEAR. Vill)ur, McCann. Russell, Haitshorne and Gallagher played in ' Varsity games, and yet with all our promise, we got stage-fright in the Sophomore game and let them beat us 6-0 on a fluke. The next year Wilbur and McCann were gone, and at odd ti mes. Post, Hinshaw, Reynolds, Gallagher and Kleinz graced and disgraced the ' Varsity. Once Gallagher dropped the ball after having brilliantly carried it over the opponent ' s line. Patrick occasionally appeared in a suit, but to keep in training for Philadelphia, and football proved incompatible. Again we foolishly lo.st the Freshman game on a fluke by a 6-5 score. We are ashamed of the defeat, because winning was really an obvious and easy matter. Junior Year found us without the help of Russell, Kleinz and Gallagher, all ' Varsity certainties sooner or later. Our light team had an unfortunate season, but it was typically plucky. Post and Levin played regularly on the ' Varsity and won their letters. Both were brilliant. Levin acted as captain during the last four games, and was elected to the position for Senior Year. 109 Senior year brought out half the class — even Patrick (for a day). The team went to Island Heights for a preliminary practice under Atwood and Guiney — various kinds of practice, for Deane appeared with the inevitable feminine, and Patrick ironed shirts at midnight, much to the discomfiture of Mrs. Peto, who appeared in indefinite muslin and requested the Chinese Laundry to suspend operation. Hinshaw, who had been out of the game with a frilled leg for two years, came to the backfield and carried the weights and woes of the team with his usual grace, a most powerful man, as fullback, as well as elsewhere. Hartshorne, in his third year of hard work made a half back position, and with Levin at quarter, and Post playing his brilliant game at center, hair, teeth, crouch and all, 1911 was the nucleus of a great team— the best team at Haverford for several years. For one thing, we defeated Lehigh 5-0, and out- played their superior weight on every line of the field. Even Cox kissed mother earth before his beef began to accelerate— and even after, when Dave and Post would get him by one leg or both and prostrate the monster on the sod. Rutgers. i ' k with a 21-6 victory over Swarthmore, expected easy meat at Haverford, but they ■ went back to the banks of the old Raritan outplayed in a tie score. And there ■ were other proud games, in which our players played like gladiators, and never an I underhand trick in the season. Hinshaw and Taylor were nearly murdered in cold blood, and glad to take it. Levin was the headiest captain in years, and Post, when shall we have another such a center? Both were walking rule books. Levin would stalk up to the referee and argue in referee cockney until the poor fellow decided he didn ' t know how to referee football after all. And Post— Post would quote Horace in the face of a swearing mucker. Football would not be football to us without Reynolds, the four year captain of the Scrub. He could tackle a telegraph pole — and only a hundred thirty pounds! He would rather play football than eat. And for all his plugging, the prize cups which he won never materialized. They are imaginary prize cups. Schoepperle and Tebbetts had an interesting rivalry for any position which might turn up by accident. It was not so much a matter of playing football for Schoep, but rather a matter of making Atwood believe he could. Atwood either believed it or was too polite to question it. In the Delaware game, a pimply party called Schoep a naughty name and slapped him in the face — and Schoep begged 110 his pardon! Schoep got through the season without having more than an inch of his nose Ivnocked off, Wadsworth nearly got his head knoclied off — but as they say — it ' s all in the game. ' We have given our best efforts to the game in our four years on Walton Field, and we have been true sportsmen and true Haverfordians. For in a small college like ours football is no easy matter, — rather so hard a matter that usually before the season is half over, the strife against heavier oppo- nents has taken the best efforts we can give. And yet, for Haverford. Hon- dull it is to pause, to make an end. To rust uJiburnished, not to shine in use. ' As tho ' to hnathe were life! Life piled on life Were all too little. . . Ill iy K have always soccered. We, Us Co. take the jack-pot when it comes to kicking the ball and the y referee and each other around the field. We realize of course, that there is in Haverford College only one Royal Straight Class — but right here gentlemen. We hold Five Aces, and no miracles. P ' reshman Year, Bill and Trink slipped in one apiece on the Sophomores, within five minutes of the end. Now that the years are gone by, we wish to confess that Bill ' s was off-side, even if the referee didn ' t notice it. The score stands 2-1 on the records. Later we tied the Seniors, who afterwards .scored five on u.s — the sins of one game are visited on us in the next In Sophomore year at the co.st of three tie games and a broken leg for Dave, we won the cham- pionship. Dave has wanted a new infirmary ever since. Junior year we fizzled. Besides Dave, Alan and Tosty were out, and W ' addy had not yel feath- ered. So we didn ' t even get to the finals, but lost to the Seniors 1-2. (We shot another goal from off- side but we did not get away with it.) 113 Henry Ferris was the original grandstand sensation in Senior year. A 40-yard drive from Henry ' s fantastic toe silenced the Junior cockiness for upwards of twelve hours. The Freshmen then tied us by shooting into their own goal, and in the second game, the wind veered around as if we had got Aeolus in the proper humor. An instep shot from Dave, and our second championship was won. Our men worked like second-hand clothes dealers, and did not let any- thing get by without taking a shot at it. Csesar made the team in Freshman year, when we tied Columbia for Intercollegiate Championships. By Sophomore year he was playing a beautiful game, and was made All Ameri- can half-back. Tosty played well in Freshman year, but did not appear again until the fall of 1910, when he made a full- back position, and pulled off his left hook on the ball through- out the season. Ed Russell made the team in Sophomore year, with Trink in the forward line for some of the games. Bill became a full-back in Junior year. Finally as Seniors, we boasted of Csesar, Tosty, Howard, Bill, Trink and Duer— six of the successful 1911 eleven. Of these Csesar, Howard and Tosty won their letters, and the team won for Haverford, the Intercollegiate Championship. 114 o VAH AS ' V ©Y the time Hal Worthington and Ed Russell knew enough to win a point in a meet they left col- lege. Hal could do a slow series on the rings and Eddie could make a stand on the parallels now and then. Cousin Bill loafed in the gymnasium building and gave a tone to our gymnasium pro- clivities. Occasionally Patrick would drop in, his magnificent figure draped in ragged black tights. Pat practiced the kip for two years, and after the two years he asserts that he did it once when nobody was looking. Wadsworth and Jetf Clark finally came to rescue the honor of the cla.ss. Both could do the kip two out of three times. Their enthusiasm was occasionally bolstered by a little Hot Air from one of the various chairmen of the Gymnasium Encouragement Committee, all appointed by Jimmy Babbitt. 11.5 All was quiet in the land until finally we acquitted ourselves by sacrificing Shep on the mana- gerial altar. Fiery oratory in college meeting, five assistant managers, and a surplus, all attest the interest at heart we have in gymnasium, even if we have done no monkey shines. In Senior year the team won its first points in the Intercollegiates, lost to Rutgers and Penn, and won from Lehigh. There were other special exhibitions besides, a trapeze balancing act by Princeton, some finished work by New York, the demolishment of Black Oak Lane by Patrick ' s famous Coon Town Fire Department, in which Mammy Hinshaw was heroically rescued, and even a prize-fight in which Pat and Vic acted as seconds. 1 :7 TRA OUR records in track are unique. Patrick does the quarter from North Barclay to the railroad station in three and a half minutes, but returning the same evening it often takes him three- quarters of an hour. Henry Ferris is our original hundred-yard milk consumer, time 8 [ ; and where is there a better Marathon conversationalist than our own Burghard Boyer? And yet the history of our cinder slingers is worth a page of this book of great deeds. Our stars are not effulgent and unbeatable, but they are at least rather good-looking. In Freshman Year, 1910 beat us, but there is no shame in such a defeat. Gallagher made the Relay Team, and we were easily third in the Interclass. The next year we scored a signal victory over 1912, 52-27 points. Jimmy Ash made the Relay, and .scored several times in the College Duals. This was the year that Shep ran the hurdles. He ran around three, knocked over four, and cleared the la.st one after four seconds ' deliberation. Time, 29J. Junior Year we were latent, for Jimmy had various afflictions, including blood poisoning, heart- trouble and appendicitis. The Doctor took him out after the Relays. Ed Ru.s.sel, Herb and Gib Smith had all left college. Senior Year finds us a close second in the Interclass. Wadsworth is running like a sewing ma- chine. Pete Spaulding, Bill Hartshorne, and our Nawth C ' lina athlete, Dick Hobbs, are all kicking up the du.st and cinders. Occasionally they .send Ik Bowerman around, instead of using a road roller. 119 QIXETEEX-ELEVEN opened its cricket career in Freshman year by beating the Sophomores. John and Billum. fresh from Westtown, took all the wickets in twelve overs for 31 runs. Both had their eyes on the First XI which Bill finally made, leaving John to be high gun on the Second XI. We lost the class championship to the Seniors. In Sophomore year John and Bill bowled at each other from opposite ends on the Fir.st XI. John ' s eye grew more and more piercing and his step grew quicker and more important as he went out to bat at the fall of the first wicket. Taylor kept wickets on the Second XI and was thirteenth man on the Canadian trip on which only twelve were taken. The Westtown pair, above mentioned, went on this trip and distinguished themselve.s on several occasions — both on the field and off. La.st year Taylor kept wickets on the Fir.st XI and Ferris was moved up to the same team. The latter ' s .score of 70 in the Next XV game created c)uite a stir l)ut more glory was to come. Henry bowled mie over in the Germantown game but showed signs of nervousness and was removed. The 121 biggest feat of the year was the victory over Penn and the placing of the Intercollegiate cup once more in its proper cabinet in the trophy room. We had Penn ' s first five wickets for seven runs and all were out for sixty-five without an extra. 1911 had a hand in getting every wicket — either caught bowled or run out — but two, and these were taken by a Freshman. In the other Intercollegiate game — that with Cornell — John took six wickets for three runs. On Commencement Day from Founder ' s Porch, Colors were awarded to Taylor and Downing. On June 11, the S. S. Baltic sailed from New York with Haverford ' s fourth English team. Bill immediately surprised the boat — both passengers and crew — by his assurance and success in procuring feminine acquaintances. With the ladies Bill certainly showed results of his constant drill and cam- paign manoeuvres at Bryn Mawr. One particularly bold feat caused great jealously until Bill found other pasture in a French-speaking governess. John immediately became the terror of the bath- steward whom he devoted to the infernal gods one morning when none too gently awakened. John claims that a man is not responsible for what he says at such an hour especially after he has turned his watch forward a whole hour on retiring. To our great surprise Bill did not get lost during the whole trip, Trink ' s record is not so clear. While waiting at a junction cji route to Oxford, John wandered out of sight of the be-plastered cricket luggage. A train pulled into the station and was inspected by John ' s far sighted glasses. As the train was about to start John became flustered, saw a pretty girl in a nearby compartment, and hearing the guard yell Reading hopped in beside her, looking out the window just in time to see his team mates board a train going in the opposite direction. It is not usual to pay one ' s way to gaol, but John disregarded custom for the while. Reading was just 180 ' out of the direction for which John ' s ticket read. However, he saw the famous gaol at Reading and quoted poetry about it when he again found the team five hours later. Bill in the meantime was inspecting the Sunday parade along the river at Oxford and was taking account of the great variety in the color of hosiery. But so much for the frivolity. The record of the team in games won and lost was not particu- larly good. The batting was poor, the bowling fair, but we had the best fielding team that has ever gone across, and no team ever had a better time. Mr. Cope again and again came to the financial aid of the travellers, though Bill is said to have jingled two hay-pennies in his trowser ' s pocket for four weeks without company. After the last school game — that at Rossall — in the hotel at Fleetwood, Taylor was elected captain 122 for 1911. His speech at the Captain ' s dinner was a horrible affair; — few of the fellows knew that he was attempting one — but he insists he did. With the opening of our last year the cricket prospects are bright. The class XI will have no changes and the first XI has made a good start. But, after all, the greatest cricket boast of 1911 is her undefeated Wogglehug team. On this historic team will be remembered the masterly playing of Rossie, Wink and Dick, Ronald Christie, Worthington and Russell, Cousin Will and Gib Smith — all of whom have left us. But the team is still strong, for Alan, Arnold, Jay, Dan, Towse and Shep still show wonderful form at all times and punch the ball over the ropes on Babbitt Field without the slightest effort. 123 (FI|P i txuttfavhxtxtt HS a class we have never been humbugs enough to hug any literary illusions to our bosoms ; there is not one of us who could tell a Muse from a mud-lark if he should meet them strolling arm in arm. But during the term of our pilgrimage here we have perpetrated various literary nimblenesses in the garb of poetry or prose. The more racy or the more impossible of these were privately circulated, the rest claimed public attention either in the classic pages of The Haverfordiaii. or in the more roman- tic and ungrammatical columns of the Weekhj and the Middle Barclay Squirt. Since there is scarcely one of us who at some time or other has not stirred up his brains in his inkwell and sat him down to dash off a sonnet or a roundelay, we must needs give lady Poetry the front seat in our recollections. Some time in Sophomore Year, Lucius Shero was bitten with a sort of moon- germ ; already, we may suppose, he had fallen under the spell of some terrestrial damsel. Forthwith he prayed in ponderous iambics that the moon might .sail serenely over the lady ' s head which was far far away. Astronomical conditions remaining unchanged, he addressed his next flight of poesy to Her herself, and in melting heroic couplets entreated her to hearken to his sighs. Arnold Post was next smitten with the phrensie. using the sonnet as the vehicle for his passion ; a vehicle which in his facile hands became as dainty and as supple as a one-legged wheel-barrow. His worst lines are: The .joy of nature ' s silence is so sweet. Which kept from parlous paths my toddling feet. his best : Last night I spent dreaming r)f heart ' s desire. And then 1 got up and built the kitchen fire. Alas! ' twas ever thus. But the subtle will ob.serve that there is not much dilTerence between Post at his best and at his wor.st. 125 Then Shoep appeared in The Havevfordian with some graceful verses, which, like all inspired poetry, left the intellect of the feeble reader somewhat bemused as to what it was all about. Who was the thee that Vic was going to dwell with, under God ' s blue bell ? Was it his room-mate, Ken- nett Square Reynolds, — or was it not? These were the Great Poets of those Arcadian days of Sophomoredom. Of the smaller fry of poetasters, some mention must be made of Henry ' s Ode to his Orient Brother, Deeply Dipped in Doubt, and of Jack Bradway ' s many and amorous lyrics, which, though coldly rejected by The Haver- fordian, wended their burning way to Bryn Mawr. Cale Winslow ' s Lay of the Last Dime will always be sung by those who remember it, and even such a pessimistic soul as Jay Price is generally reputed to have written some femininely inspired idyls, but even the initiate have never seen more than his Ballad on Driving in the Rain. But these were all in the Golden Age when poetry was a matter of inspiration. With the advent of Junior Year and the Great Unknown, passion gave way to book-keeping as a requisite for poetry. When it came to writing poetry, the Unknown had Lucius put to bed without saying his prayers, he had Vic up a sycamore tree yelling for help. He soon showed us that he was the one and only original, sterilized. Government Inspected, sugar cured, picnic twist Poet that had ever ambled bovinely down the Parnassus Turnpike. The man ' s very presence perspired poetry. It was our overwhelming sense of his superiority which hushed forevermore our humble lays, and the flowery meads where our more gentle Muses were wont to linger were given over to the pasturage of the fatted calf. It seemed sad to leave forever a field in which we had shown such youthful promise, but we were never more to pour out a lover ' s plaint in the graceful, swan-like hexameter. Our next flights to Helicon were on the broad back of the gentle essay. Shoep took a Fling at Bacon, and before he was through he had that Elizabethan worthy backed off the wharf into the bitter waters of Salt River. Arnold turned his toddling feet down that parlous path which Dante trod; in short, he went to Hell and found congenial company there. Why they let him come away, no one knows. Perhaps like another Orpheus, he sang them to sleep; at any rate on his return he penned a defense of that much maligned place of torment. It was witty and convincing enough to appear in the erstwhile orthodox Haverfordian, but it was a trifle too strong for the authorities of Westtown School, so they had all available copies burned by the common hangman of that institution. Encouraged by this unhoped-for mark of approval, he turned his pen towards an exposition of Bootlicking, a subject upon which few 126 can speak with greater authority than he. Jay endeavored to scale Parnassus by means of his Obser- vations on an Open Fire,, but found the walking- rather rough. After one or two spasms of literary criticism, he jumped into notoriety as the author of The Cheerful Liar. Some there were who claimed that this was autobiographical, others, that it was the cry of the damned, but the worldly wise shook their heads and said it was both. Lucius ' jibe at Browning was an essay of merit, but it was not alleviated by any too great amount of lightness of style. It was during this time that we made our flying raid into the field of fiction. The burning fires of the gentle passion which had been dammed back since we renounced Poetry now burst into new blossom in a series of love stories. Shoep was the chief offender in this matter, and the emotions which he handed out were vivid enough to have been his own, but perhaps they were only projected. Arnold gave us a droll story on Monkton Ridge, somewhat after the French manner of sparing no details, however shady. In a fit of somnambulism Eben brought forth a storiette on the Detective ' s Umbrella, and followed it with Jepson ' s Jeopardy, which was unexpectedly funny. But our crown of rejoicing in the fiction line is Vic ' s novel, The Illusion of the Moth, which is now wending its serial way through successive numbers of The Haverfordian. How it is going to end, no one knows, not even Vic, but that is a small matter. Compared to it the Decamerone is a collection of nursery tales, and our friend, Elinor Glyn, as innocent as a baldheaded babe. In the matter of editorial wo rk we feel that we have done something worthy of recollection. When Vic seized the helm, The Haverfordian received a remarkable injection of vigor into its some- what senile veins. He took that venerable institution in hand, and by his efforts it became one of the best college magazines in the country. In his Exchange Column he showed that there was one field in which we could excel, and established there a standard to which his successors have found difficult the approach. (Except Jay himself, who wrote this article and is modest as a mushroom.) As to the two other periodicals mentioned, the Middle Barclaij Squirt has long since lapsed into innocuous desuetude, but the Weekly is with us alway, even unto the bitter end. It is a by-product of Dave ' s brain, and is the official organ of his Policies. Its columns furnish us an interesting reminder as to what happened the day before yesterday. When Dave gets into editorial action, sparks, spelling and grammar fly to the winds. Occasionally in its pages he too essays to flght to Parnassus, but he (and the rest of us, too) usually discovers that his winged Pegasus is but a cow in a cage. Speaking of cows reminds us of that gem of purest ray serene which ever an exchange artist 127 discovered. We venture to quote it, with proper acknowledgments, as a bit of allegorical advice to all sprouting authors whose ambitions have not yet been nipped in the bud. Why, Cow, how canst thou be so satisfied. So well content with all things here below, So unobtrusive and so sleepy-eyed. So meek, so lazy and so awful slow? Dost thou not know that everything is mixed; That nothing ' s as it should be on this earth; That grievously the world needs to be fixed; That nothing we can give has any worth ; That times are hard; that strife is full of care Of sin, of trouble and untowardness; That love is folly, friendship but a snare? Up, Cow! This is no time for laziness. The end thou chewest is not what it seems. Get up and moo! Tear ' round and quit thy dreams. P. S. Are you a cow? [Mount Holyoke.] 128 iloubag ICunrI) 3lnsptrattou This inspiring poem was written by a member of our Class. It is an inspired poem on an inspiring subject. Hill Hep Hep Living the step Over the gleaming sand Twinkle the waves Whose water laves The wood lake ' s peaceful strand. The delightful Hep. Hep, Hep. of the first line shows how inspiring such a simple thing can be. When you read the second line and catch the meter, go back and read the Hep, Hep, Hep all over again. You will have to do it fast to make it rime. You see, this poem is a fast poem — almost breath- less. Twinkle the wave. ;. What a refreshing line is TiriukU- the wares! Supposing it were The leaves twinkle — how much ditt ' erent that would be. Then the next line would have to end with binkle or dinkle. Pensonally we prefer T ir inkle the wares because it brings in the word oc(s, and lares is such a nice word. For instance it would not be polite to tell a man to wa. ' th his feet, — but nobody would mind having to lave his feet. A clean man laves twice a day. A lave room is a bath room, hence the soft sound of s in the word lavatory, as in scissors. Wild in the wood Sparkles the blood Home-planning ' ncath the bltic The wood r.hnck digs Crackle the twigs As we pass n-here the wood doves coo, 129 Ah now, quit that. Really it is embarrassing to criticise such a poem. Did you ever see the blood sparkling in the wood? Snood would be a better word than blood. Blood and wood don ' t rime anyways. And a snood is so much better because a snood is what a girl ties up her hair with to keep it on straight. A pink snood would be a better color than blood — more delicate, and you can wash — I mean lave it with gasoline when it gets dirty. The woodchuck digs is a pretty line and very inspiring. Keep on digging old woodchuckie and vou ' ll get there. Now any man who is not poetic in his soul would rime something about pigs with this line. But this is the real inspired poetry. No Peruna in this. Pigs wash. — they do not lave, and so they don ' t get a look-in on this poem. Guinea pigs might, but the word guinea is an anapest sylla- ble, and we need a dactyl. Siveet guinea pigs might do if there were no music in your soul. As u ' c pass where wood doves coo — come on now, do you notice that first person plural? There is a woman in this somewhere. Our own critical instinct about the snood shows this, and notice that v ' ord home-planning in the third line. I knew a man who had wood doves. He fed them salted peanuts once and they didn ' t coo after that — they croaked. Here there is calm Brought with the balm Borne from the bending pines Veiled in mist By green leaves kist Mellow the soft sun shines. This poem resembles a slot machine. Every time you bite off a piece there is something to chew on. Here there is calm — how much better that is than Here there is balm. The balm comes from the pine trees, do you get that? Balm is a species of liniment. Balm is the real article, no antiphlogis- tine or New Jersey mud. Balm is sort of slippery elm. Ask for Balm the next time you go to the barber shop — it will make you feel like writing a poem on Inspiration. By green leaves kist. Green leaves don ' t grow on pine trees but the author of this poem is above finicky points. This is called poetic license. Kist is the important word here. The author was cer- tainly slow if he let the green leaves kiss that kid with the snood tied around her head. Never let any- thing like that get by or they will know you are from Philadelphia. Kist is the new acoustic way of 130 spelling: kissed but tha t doesn ' t make it any better. All we can say about this verse is Rotten! What would that girl with the pink snood think — and a Haverford man too. Breath from the pines Lightens the lines Smoothing out wrinkles of care Under our feet Breathe we the sweet Odor of mayHowers rare. We are certainly glad to get that breath from the pines, but it would have to be pretty strong to lighten the lines any. Smoothing out icrinkies of care is interesting. It shows how the author is getting worried. Don ' t worry, Cuthbert we are with you on this. Umhr our feet breathe we the sweet odor of May flowers rare. The inverted order proves that this must be visualized to be appreciated. We have stepped on some Mayflowers, and we have bent over to smell them under our feet. This is not a comfortable position to be in, but it is poetic. All art ought to be universal. Face we the lake Joy in the quake As winds through the tree tops wheeze Far in the wild I am a child Of brown aborigines. The dope on this verse is as follows. As we smelt the Mayflowers ' neath (poetic for beneath) our feet, we look between our legs and face the lake. That is how we get joy in the quake. We knew there would be an earthquake somewhere along in here. Quake is short for (luiver which rimes with shiver. Ak winds through the tree-tops wheeze. This is the summit of inspiration. Any common man like u. would slip the word sneeze in after a line like this. Did you ever hear the breeze wheeze through the trees? Take it from us, electric fans are a poor imitation of the beauties of nature. 131 am a child of brown aborigines. Don ' t be too credulous, dear reader. This is a little off- color, and is to be interpreted mystically like Plato. Believe me, I knew his father and mother, and they run a dairy farm in New Jersey. But soft, what now. Then ho far a life Wiih an Indian wife Safe in the solemn waste Here we may run Soft in the sun Swifter than Amazons raced. Indian wife, what? With a wife like that we would have to be pretty far back in the solemn waste. A lovely spectacle she ' d make at an afternoon tea. Who would want to talk jargon to some old black-haired squaw? She would shy at an automobile, and she would not lave unless you threw her in. And then she would be apt to cut your whiskers off some night, or throw a tomahawk at the cat. As for me I ' ll spend my wampum on the girl with the snood. She might scorch the oatmeal for breakfast, but she could act like a lady at Delmonico ' s. An Indian wife may be all right for poetry, but as for me give me the kid that chews with me on the same stick of spearmint, and sings kind of soft like cuddle up a little closer. A meeting of The Heofordostor Club was held last evening. The purpose of the meeting was to talk as much and say as little as possible. Honorary member, Jas. A. Babbit, dosted to each mem- ber privately, patting him assuringly on the back, and addressing him as ole fellah. Dostor Hin- shaw meanwhile sprayed an excellent line of Dost in the atmosphere, and though the members appeared to believe everything he said, no one really listened. Chief Heofordostor Seller also attempted to make a speech, but Babbitt and Hinshaw retired, the former to run over to Atlantic City before supper, the latter to mould public opinion among Heofordost swallowers. President Schoepperle, Grand High Heofordostor and Founder of the Organization, tore off a little concentrated Heofordost to the empty seats, and elected A. G. H. Spiers and J. K. Patrick regular members of the Club. 132 iErminmtra U. iir ELL, let ' s see, how many of you were able to get out this morning? All here but Clarke, eh, well | he ' s a scoundrel isn ' t he? Yes, I think so. Well, let me see, suppose we have some cases this morning. Now Downing let ' s see if you can tell us something interesting — we all want to be inter- ested, you know, and we ' ii try to keep awake. [Downing gives an illustrative banking case with many hesitating and apologetic ah ' s between each big word.] Well now. Downing, do you think you understand that very intricate case? You tliink you do, eh, but you aren ' t so very sure — no I don ' t believe so. Well you haven ' t stated it so I can understand it anyway. You just read that over again and leave out a few of those complainants and defendants, indorsees and payees and so forth. Now for some more cases. Who has any more cases? Don ' t be too mode.st about putting up your hands. Haven ' t any of you read any cases? Well now you mustn ' t forget about these cases and next time Ijring in two or three. Now suppose we see what the book has to say. How many of you have read the book? Nobody read any of this delightful book by Bolles? Well now aren ' t you naughty boys? Don ' t you feel badly about it? Yes, I ' m sure you do. You know one of my boys a few years. ago said that my course was all right but I didn ' t make the boys work hard enough. We all want to have work enough, you know. Now I ' ll tell you a little about bank directors and presidents and some more intelligent people like that. I ' ll begin by telling you a story — you don ' t mind hearing a story do you — anything to keep awake during part of this sleepy hour. You know we all get sleepy, but if you can ' t keep awake or alnioKf awake why I ' ll excu.se you and you just go out and take a nap. Well, this story I was going to tell you is about an old friend or rather acquaintance of mine — fine looking old chap — great talker, but a little too fond of his toddy, — just a little too fond of his toddy. Well, this old fellow got to be president of the old American Bank. Used to be down here on Chestnut Street, broke up some years ago. He had things pretty much his own way, you know — we all like to be boss don ' t we? — and pretty .soon he 133 found the directors ' peepers were getting a little hazy. Couldn ' t see much you know. — So this old rascal he began to juggle the books around to suit himself and take a little pocket-money for trolley fares you know, and peanuts, and he told the boys never mind, he would tend to the investments. Well, you know, things went along smoothly enough for a year or two and then one day the final reckoning came. And then such a panic as there was around that sleepy old bank ! The directors ' peepers began to open and they put on their gold rimmed spectacles. Then the old Mr. President he remembered those sheckels he ' d been using for peanut money and just as soon as the sleepy direc- tors in their old checked trousers got awake, old Mr. President he picks up his slouch hat and says, good-bye boys. Now how was that for a nice bank president, respectable man, you know, — passed the collection plate on Sunday, — he stole all the loose ducats — fifty, sixty thousan ' and then said, Ex- cuse me, my time is up. That sly old fox had been feeding those sleepy directors fat cigars and toddy and was robbing the poor old-maids and lame farmers of their money. Pretty small potatoes! I call that pretty small potatoes ! Now, now, not quite so much noise on that back row. You know we must have a little order while the class is going on — just a little bit. I don ' t like to see so many of you back there. You know I told you last time to move up this way a little. I don ' t want you to be afraid of me. I won ' t hurt you, you know, and I ' m not so very fierce. You know when I was a boy, not so many hundred years ago — no not so mmiy — a long time this side of the flood. Yes, when I was a boy we all had to sit right up around the teacher and didn ' t have a chance to take any little naps — no siree. Well, that story I just told you reminds me of one about contemporaneous with it — contemporaneous — a pretty long word to use on a Friday isn ' t it? Well, I don ' t know, we mustn ' t tell too many stories must we? I wonder what our good president would say to so many stories. I guess we ' d better leave that one till next time — pretty good story of an old man back in the war — his old partner told me this. An old rascal he was too — great old fighter, but he had no more patriotism, no more patriotism than that old cow — not a bit. Well, now, we ' ll see about the next lesson and then I ' ll let you go. How much do you want to read for Tuesday? We are all too ambitious aren ' t we? hold on a minute here, how about that examination we must have before long? Why yes we ' ll have to have that Tuesday won ' t we? Well you come in Tuesday prepared to write and I ' ll have some questions for you over the last three chapters of this delightful book. You know I don ' t believe in these examinations but our good President, you 134 know, he thinks I ' m too easy on you boys — don ' t work you hard enough — so we ' d better have an exam- ination next time. Now you come in and write all you know and hand in a neat paper, well written and you ' ll all get good grades — some of you a thousan ' — yes some of you a thousan ' . But I want you to write the full hour, you know, and I don ' t want to see anybody scootin ' out that door before the bell rings ! Now I ' ll let you go and you can all take naps where you ' ll be more comfortable. Dear Editor: A young lady friend of mine wrote me a letter to which she attached a special delivery stamp. What inferences shall I deduct from that circumstance ' ? Thanking you in advance, I remain, Yours, a Bashful Tristram, Charles Wadsworth, 3d. P. S. — The stamp was blue. The reply was: Although you do not expressly state it, you imply that the sentiments of the letter were such as would necessitate a speedy delivery lest they lose their freshness. Reply by tele- gram P. D. Q. C. 0. D. The blueness of the stamp was probably a delicately veiled reference to the lyric — Roses are red and violets blue, Sugar is sweet and so are you. 136 Advertisements t: .. T ! a V V 0) o IS u 3 o o m ' u •u c to to u u •0 to ■ - C 3 u to ' S. 0. ■5 •a m E 8 m E E u E , B in 3 n to r 10 to •a u o ■3 a, u in to 1) r, •a , aj m V o Of} u W4 o 03 U O u c « 0) V c a E u a D to U U to u B 4- U to U XI u XI •4-1 u u +-• (-• to 3 O . ,B 1 to Si u Si x: in •a a) B V 3 O J3 10 t) •s «j •s XI « - i! 4- ' M E u u V u u Si in c a c cm to •a (0 c ' C a E in B u •a h B to u u X Si to E 3 2 u oi C n u 10 XI u ■55 u XI in V ra c to to u fe -M o •s w u •g ' m c o u to 3 o C to ■5. u ■ 1 n C , in B u ■0 (C B U to •0 u 15 u tm E 2 ' 3 XI u 3 in u E£ u 3 to 4- , B to E . u N J ii £ a X u x: •o B to in . B . O to in u u 3 in m M 3 in .S u u bu ■C .£ a -S u .S o- o 2 I- •a . c 2 to XI 9 h H DC o Q a. Q Health Automobile Vehicle Employer ' s Rent Loss Fire Occupancy Residence Disability Contract Bonds Official Bonds Life Lease Elevator Glass Executor ' s Bonds Nineteen Eleven ' s INSURANCE STOKES PACKARD 422 WAINIT STREtT PHILADELPHIA BLRGURY INSURANCE is most important, but superfluous in HAVERFORD COLLEGE THE FAMOUS STEIN- BLOCH SMART CLOTHES THE FAMOUS HART, SCHAFFNER MARX CLOTHING FOR MEN AND YOUNG MEN the equal of custom-made clothing THE TWO STONGEST LINES OF MEWS CLOTHING IN AMERICA Sold in Philadelphia Exclusively by STRAWBRIDGE CLOTHIER The Group Photographs Illustrating this Book were made by H. R. POTT 1318 CHESTNUT STREET PHILADELPHIA J. B. Van Sciver Co. Manufacturers, Importers, Interior Decorators Furniture, Carpets, Rugs, Draperies Curtains, Wall Paper, Bedding SALESROOMS Opposite Pennsylvania R. R. Terminal and Ferry CAMDEN, N. J. The Special Furniture for the new Chemical Laboratory was furnished by the Van Stiver Contract Department. 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Yttcum, Treat, and Amt. Sery. William P. Landiii, Truiit i}ffievr Haworth ' s Kodaks and SUPPLIES Developing and Finishing Pictures Framed and Framed Pictures John Haworth Company 1020 CHESTNUT STREET PNIUOELPHIA Blanch Sloie -1E37 Boaril dlk. tlljnllc Cllr The PROVIDENT LIFE AND TRUST COMPANY OF PHILADELPHIA N. W. Cor. Fourth and Chestnut Streets Nos. 401-409) Insurance in Force - - $232,749,676.00 Assets 73,210,641.52 Contingency Reserve (includ- ing Capital Stock $1,000,000 • 8.971,582.80 The true objective in the management of a Life Insurance Company is two- fold: first, to maintain perfect security; second, while respecting the rights of every policy holder, to reduce the cost of insurance. Judged by this standard, the PROVIDENT claims to be unexcelled. Asa S. Wing, President T. WisTAR Brown, Vice President a UR school-boy days! Our school- boys days! Adieu ! in your bright bowers, Fond memory shall while away Life ' s later, heavier hours- Still humming o ' er the pleasant lays Of school-boy ' s happy, happy days! Haverford Pharmacy ' s Greeting and best wishes to the Class of 1911 Edvs ' ard Campbell Landscape Architect and ELng ' ineer Advice upon all Gardening Matters ARDMORE. PA. Everything for the Automobile Educated Service Both Phones Both Stores PENN AUTO SUPPLY CO. 2006 Pacific Ave. ATLANTIC CITY 236 N. Broad St. PHILADELPHIA ai_i_-the:-ye:ar-round tours FIRST CLASS SELECTED MEMBERSHIP LIMITED PARTIES EUROPE— Spring and Summer Tours via Mediterranean and the North Atlantic Routes. Unexcelled programs. MEXICO— Winter and Summer Tours. NORWAY— Annual Tour to Norway, Sweden, Denmark and Russia leaves each .June. Unsurpassed Norwegian Itinerary. CALIFORNIA Spring and Summer Tours to the Pacific Coast, including Canadian Rockies, Yellowstone Park, Alaska, Grand Canyon of the Arizona. 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The Chas. H. Elliott Co. The Largest College Engra-ving House in the World Commencement Invitations Class Day Programs and Class Pins Dance Programa and Invitations. Menus. Leather Dance Cases and Covers, Fraternity and Class Inserts for Annuals, Fraternity and Class Stationery. WEDDING INVITATIONS and CALLING CARDS PHOTOGRAVURES Works 17th STREET and LEHIGH AVENUE PHILADELPHIA, PA. We do the largest business in the city among the college and Prep, trade, for the simple reason that we sell value. The largest stock, high class work, moderate prices and the right style to please you. The colorings are beautiful this season, and we would appreciate your order. Suits, $23 to $40; Overcoats, $25 to $50 ; Tuxedo and Dress Suits, $35 to $65. Pyle, Innes h Barbieri COLLEGE TAILORS 1115 WALNUT STREET, Philadelphia Logan Trust Company OF PHILADELPHIA 1420 CHESTNUT STREET We invite the opening of regular and saving fund accounts by all persons of acknowledged character and standing. 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REESE Dealer in the finest Quality of Beef, Veal, Mutton, Lamb and Smoked Meals 1203 FILBERT STREET Bell Phone: Filbert 29-49 PHILADELPHIA Keystone Plionc: Roce 2 3 . E. Caldwell Co. Jewelers and Silversmiths Importers of HIGH-GRADE WATCHES AND CLOCKS Designers and Makers of SCHOOL AND CLASS INSIGNIAS FRATERNITY RINGS AND PINS PRIZE CUPS AND ATHLETIC TROPHIES 902 CHESTNUT STREET Philadelphia CRANE ' S ICE CREAM and BAKING Comply with the Pure Food Law. Visit us, see ingredients used and be your own judge. MAIN OFFICE 23rd Street below Locust STORE and TEA ROOM 1310 Chestnut Street Chautauqua ' ' Means these three things. Which interests you? A SYSTEM OF HOME READING Definite results from the use of spare minutes. English year now in pro- gress. Ask for C. L. S. C. Quarterly. A VACATION SCHOOL Competent instruction. Thirteen departments. Over 2500 enrollments yearly. The best environment for study. Notable lectures. Expense moderate. July and August. Ask for Summer School Catalog. A METROPOLIS IN THE WOODS All conveniences of living, the pure charm of nature, and advantages for culture that are famed throughout the world. Organized sports, both aquatic and on land. Professional men ' s clubs. Women s conferences. Great lectures and recitals. July and August. Ask for Preliminary Quarterly. Chautauqua Institution Chautauqua, N. Y. Sporting and Horse Goods Automobile Accessories Photographic Supplies Gymnasium and Track Outfits The most complete and best assorted stock in Philadelphia Keim Supply Company 1227 Market Street Philadelphia, Pa. (Slaslyn-dlliatham RARK F= l- VCE A-ri_ANXIC CITY, PJ. O. Second house from beach, overlooking Park and Ocean. Open all the year. Booklet. NATHAN L JONES, Proprietor BEAUXIRY YOUR H O IVl El by the artistic choice and arrangement of TREES, SHRUBS a. FLOWERS Have a PLANTING PLAN made by our DEPT. OF LANDSCAPE DESIGN Write to Hoopes Bro. CSt, Thomas Company S. Girard Bldg. 21 S. 12th STREET Philadelphia, Pa. 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