Harper College - Halcyon Yearbook (Palatine, IL)

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mistake right there because Iuliana over- heard and was immediately drawn to him. This knight was Sir Waldred who had fallen out of favor with the king because he invariably burped loudly whenever the king made a speach. Sir Waldred had no man- ners, all kinds of money flinglish, Roman, Greek, Persian, etc.I and he would do anything to get back into the king's good graces. Word soon reached the king fthrough Iuliana's megaphonej that maid Iuliana was smitten. With the use of a little royal oil fa little dab'll do ya, but two for good measurel Sir Waldred soon discovered that he was madly in love with maid Iuliana. And seven hundred and fifty eligible, tax-paying bachelors returned to the realm of their birth ftwo had gotten marriedl. We know, from the records, that luliana and Sir Waldred were married but the only parable to come out of the auspicious occasion is that when asked if she took Sir Waldred, and all that, she replied, Oh, fie! Of course, I do. After the ceremony, a page read a message from the king fduring which Sir Waldred burped parcitically non-stopl, in which the king raised Sir Waldred to the rank of Lord. So, Lord and Lady Waldred settled down in papa's castle, where Lady Waldred resumed her vocation as the first lady of English snobbery. Lord Waldred embarked upon a cam- paign to please his new bride. But she would grow old and narrow before he would accomplish this. In fact, he never did. He became expert with the bow, practicing at every opportunity. Oh, fie! The lowliest yeoman can do that. He became an expert at iousting, win- ning many honors at the tournaments. Oh, fie! All the nobles do that. He told her she was going to have a baby. Oh, fie! Dammit! It was during a fox chase that Lady Waldred's father caught it. First, he caught the fox, which bit him. Then, he caught rabies, which killed him. When Lady Waldred heard of this she said - well, you know what she said. For months after the funeral, people had reported seeing a ghostly figure walk- ing about the moors at night. just what all those people were doing out on the moors at night is not clear, but it must be remembered that in those days they didn't have drive-in movies. Nevertheless, one morning a frightened servant reported to Lady Waldred that she's seen her father's ghost roaming the castle at night. Oh, fie! I don't believe in ghosts, she admonished. The next day Lord Waldred announced that he had seen the ghost. Oh, fie! You're as bad as the servants, his wife chided. That night, while Lord Waldred was sitting up with a sick friend, Lady Waldred was alone in her bed chamber, embroidering Oh, fie! on the family crest. Suddently, there was a blast of chill wind and the room was cast into darkness. Before the eyes of a horrifed Lady Waldred there appeared the ghost of her father with drawn face, drawn sword, and drawn blinds. For once in her life, Iuliana was speech- less. What? No greeting for your father? spoke the apparition. There was no answer. Not even a fie for your father? Still, there was no answer. If you'll not give it, as once you gave it so freely, then l'll take the fie! He reached into her throat with his specter's hand and wrested and wrench- ed until, at last, she croaked, Fiel See! I told you I saw your father's ghost, came a voice from the doorway. It was the servant. What are you doing here? the ghost demanded. I told you to wait in the kitchen. I just came up to tell you the tea's ready, she said. l'll be down in a minute, said the ghost. The big-mouthed servant just couldn't keep a secret and she spread the story all over the place. Yer shoulda seen the ghost tear a fie from 'er throat, was her favorite line. And pretty soon, tear a fie came to mean that a person is so frightened that he is unable to speak. When the phrase was brought to this country during the latter part of the eighteenth century, feeling was running so strongly against England that the speeking was changed out of sheer spite. We had ruined one of their favorite words. rl.. L'ul

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In Medieval England there lived a maiden by the name of luliana. She was ofa noble family which was running about three steps ahead of Poverty, the local tax collector. That made if difficult for luliana's father to marry her off. Nor did she help matters any with her peculiar brand of oddity. She had the habit of beginning at least every other sentence with, Oh, fiel luliana spent the first two and a half decades of her life saying, Oh, fiel to everything in sight and looking very bored. One look at her portrait lwhich was hanged in the Royal Museum by the other portraits therl would be enough to convince the most charitable of persons that luliana had no room to Oh, fiel anyone. For this reason, whenever her father proposed marriage between her and some noble man, a reply of Yek! was always forthcoming. Her father tried mightily to find a husband for her, He even tried the tax collector who replied, Yekl l'd rather have the money. luIiana's father began to eary of the search for a husband for his daughter and one day he suggested, very discreetly, that she take up the quest herself which was, theoritically, against the rules. Oh, fiel she answered. What need have l for a husband? Well, for one thing, her father retort- ed, if I should ide, under the law all my property, such as it is, will go to your cousin, Egbert! Now, cousin Egbert was about as rotten an egg as Medieval England every produced. He was a fat, slovenly pig who ate with his fingers, slept with his hounds, bathed twice a year, and never trimmed his beard. Of course, this was true of most of the 52 Terrify By: Leigh Heflin nobility of those times. But Egbert had one definite drawback which the others did not: he wasn't fussy. He'd marry any- one - even luliana. And, under English law, when Egbert took over the property of luliana's father, he also took over luliana. He could even marry her if he wanted to A if he could get a dispensation from the Church. fThis was not difficult.l After giving some thought to the above proposition, luliana shreked, Oh, fiel true to form, and determined to try to find a husband. In luliana's case, this was not a simple task. The harder she tried, the more meager the crop of prospects became. As word of luliana's search spread, eligible men, young and old, began to marry themselves off, left and right to practically anybody. fThere is even the story of one man who married himself off to a donkey and made it stick - but this is pure heresy. She placed want ads in all the local minstrels, but to no avail. She even wrote a letter to be king, who could't read, but it was useless. He did not become alarmed until he learned that seven hundred and fifty-two eligible bachelors had left the country during one particularly active month. The king invited luliana and her father to London to attend the camel races which were being sponsored by a band of wander- ing moslems in an effort to spark the Bonds for Islam drive which had been starting fires all over Europe. While attending the races, sure enough, a fire broke out. While fleeing from the flames, luliana came upon a disgruntled knight whose winning pari- mutuel parchment had been destroyed by the fire. Oh, fiel he said, which was a

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confirmed from page 7 The teacher will move more into the role of a resource person and a guiding factor when needed f not one ofa machine which spews out truckloads of programmed knowledge to thousands of stud- ents who in turn regurgitate truckloads of pro- grammed bull. lt is mandatory that a person be allowed to look into the areas of knowledge which interest him. lf this is not done, education will repidly decline into a more computerized science than it already is. As a result of the type of education new available, there is more possibility that more people will drop out, and fall into the category of people who know not much and care even less about the things which vitally affect them. Unless we simply wish to ride along with the impending doom of the present system, there is no other course open except to change the educational system drastically. Of course, there is the option of withdrawing from societal education, but the success of this type of action would be limited to those few of true intel- ligence who would succeed in attaining their per- sonal goals, no matter what. The need for this change is manifest in the increasing minimization of students who actually set goals for themselves and see these goals realized. The fire of Revolution on University campuses has not been extinguished yet, it has merely disguised itself under a cloak of more reational action. However, it is smouldering, and if allowed to continue to merely smoulder, its last flicker may soon be seen. lt is up to anyone who is legitimately lby their own choicel on a col- lege campus, or high school for that matter, to speak out and to take the necessary steps, how- ever drastic, to see that the proper action is taken to form a truly educational society in every aspect. lt is the educational system which affects our total beingg for no matter what we do besides initiate action, we have learned to do it and the manner in which we learn in turn affects the way we teach. If this is changed, many prople may be shocked to find some true happiness in living, whether they run a corporation or collect gar- bage lboth of which pay about the same nowl. Since the change is inevitable, it would be well to think of what system would be best for Harper. However, there is a problem The traditional stumbling block for changes in a iunior college is the fear that it cannot be more liberal than the the 4 year schools than it sends students to. How- ever, the check will different schools about the 54 acceptability of A-B-C no-credit grades shows this reasoning to be false. lt is the opinion of the authors that the A-B-C no-credit system has shown itself to be a viable improvement and should be used for all courses with a pass-fail option similar to the University of lllinois', available for electives. So far about 200 Harper students have signed a petition requesting an A-B-C no-credit system for Harper with only about 8 students refuring to sign. These 2000 student signatures are about 16 times the number of students who voted in the last Student Senate elections. And yet, the old system remains. Dr. Fischer, Vice-President of Student Affiars said, I don't think that Harper is ready for a new system. Are you ready for A-B-C no-credit system? A new system that doesn't punish you twice? Or, since it was good enough for the past fourteen years, does that make it good enough now? .. -.rf t .. ... . :ff :fm ri, ltr -any wfn.-my-t.gn-ra1fgu-Gzz'v+w-,gfi-,H-