Hammond Central School - Spotlight Yearbook (Hammond, NY)

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HAMMOND HIGH HAPPENINGS ,19.' Suicide Drive. Its proprietress, Miss Srva M. McLear has open- ed with a special sale on Felt hats. One for 98c, two for 99c. Of course, Felts come high this season for they are much in demand among discriminating young ladies.”. Another headline reads: “Mrs. Cyril N. McDougall Di- vorces Well-to-do Hushand. Charges alienation of affec- tions and mental cruelty. Miss Lucille Brough, the town danc- ing teacher, has been named co-respondent.” Farther down the page: Miss A. Evelyn Campbell is giving free demonstrations of reducing methods, at the Town Hall this week. Her motto is, “Look Before You Eat.” In the less notable events it says that Marshal Tyler has been granted a patent for his fire extinguisher. Mr. Tyler has high hopes that his remark- able invention will be'long re- membered in scientific circles. Marriage announcements: “Miss Doris Foote of Ham- mond to a prominent citizen of Brier Hill. Misses LaVerna Carter and Audrey Merritt are giving a kitchen shower for her tomorrow night. Everyone requested to bring a rolling pin for the bride’s future use.” “Since Roscoe Pilger’sAre-' turn from Hawaii where1; he has made extensive study: of ladies’ bathing suits and loung- ing pajamas, many new modes have been introduced about town. At present he is very busy designing a bathing suit for Mrs. Bill Derby, nee Dor- othy Conger.” “Howard D. Moore, our em- inent veterinary, has opened a new and well patronized of fice over Dr. Empey’s. His cli- ents are those whom Dr. Em- pey does not treat. His rates are very reasonable—Sj 10 for pulling a horse’s tooth, $8.50 for a cow’s and only $2.50 a- piece for hen’s teeth. He also sells limburger cheese and French perfume to make mon- ey for his vast fox ranch in Pleasant Valley.” WHAT THE FUTURE HOLDS Recently, while visiting in Syracuse, I went to see a crys- tal gazer. I told her I was rath- er doubtful about seing any- thing but she urged me to try. As she set the beautiful ball before me, my surroundings' seemed to recede and I found

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18 HAMMOND HIGH HAPPENINGS Northrop’s desk and his own). Kenneth—The right to ful- fill Jean’s Christmas “Dream.” Virginia—The right to have charge of all assembly pro- grams next year. Harold K.—The sole right to amuse Jean and Dorothy. Jean—A memorandum, so she won’t lose track of her “Bills.” William D.—A copy of “To Have and To Hold.” Dorothy—Some new pupils for dancing instructions. Donald M.—A shock ab- sorber to be used when he gets A in Geometry. Florence—Some of “Dot’s” late knowledge on “dates.” Cedric—A new car so he’ll have a chance to use his per- mit. Isabel—A coil of rope to be used as she thinks necessary. Arthur—More hours in the day or night (just as he pre- fers). LaVerna — Some adhesive tape to be used on Wendell Nicol only. Alton—A new unbreakable thumb. Carol—A ladder and a book on “Plow to Make Excuses Con- zincing.” William M.—A new assign- ment note book. Mae—A “Jack-in-the-box.” Robert—A new horse which won’t suddenly drop dead. And now having thus dis- posed of all property of fit val- ue we do hereby set our seal to this document on the eighth day of May, nineteen hundred and thirty-one. Erva McLear, Roscoe Pilger, Leah Bates, Ploward Moore, Doris Foote, Cyril McDougall, Evelyn Campbell, Marshal Tyler. SENIOR CLASS PROPHECY Our Hammond Aggravator has just arrived. I’m always so interested in the local gossip I can hardly wait until Thurs- day. Quite often, however, one of my neighbors drops in, and then of course the paper is not necessary. Gracious! here’s some articles about those in the class of 1931. I’ll have to read this. Well, for land’s sakes! Here it says, “A new millinery shop has been opened on the cor- ner of Bulldog Avenue and

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20 HAMMOND HIGH HAPPENINGS f myself in the midst of my school companions. In front of me I saw a large post office. While I stood wait- ing for my mail, I was startled to recognize Janet Gallagher as the postmistress. When she advanced to greet me, I saw Bill Derby in the far corner, seemingly interested in a book of games. I was reminded of the party at the Methodist church when that scene had occurred before. As this picture slowly faded away, I found myself in a ! beautiful cathedral. I was ! greatly surprised to find Eve- lyn Goodwin and her former pet antipathy, James Fletcher, at the altar. There also was the minister, Roy Willard, in a swallow tail'coat and yellow satin trousers. He was acting as officiating clergyman. The setting for the next scene was a huge Chautauqua tent. Much to my surprise and consternation, I recognized the name of Jean Stiles as lectur- er. Suddenly, there was a hush, and I saw Jean advancing tow- ards us. But oh! What a change!! She was dressed in a long severe black gown. Her hair was drawn into a tight knot and she wore great horn- ed rim glasses. As she announc- ed the subject of her lecture, I was filled with wonder and could scarcely believe my ears when I heard that it was on, 'The Evils of the Younger Generation. ” As she finished her lecture, a sleight of hand performer appeared. I suspected that it would be Maurice Edgar and I was not mistaken. The last but not least on this program was Roger Craig, now a celebrated saxaphone player, but unlike most of them he was taking refresh- ments at numerous intervals. There seems to be a confus- ion in the crystal and upon looking closer, I beheld an op- era scene. A large assemblage of people was expectantly awaiting some important per- sonage. An awed hush de- scended upon the audience as a tall man with flowing brown hair and holding a violin in his sensitive, tapering fingers eame forward. Who should it be but our studious friend, Floyd Hunter? The scene changed abrupt- ly to a base ball diamond. The crowd cheered madly as the