Hamilton High School - Hamiltonian Yearbook (South Hamilton, MA)

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6 The HAMILTONIAN A Five Cent Snake Value — One Dollar J CAN still remember that day when I paid five cents for a snake with its poison gland cut out. The first time I held it, I got the creeps and had all that I could do to keep from yelling, but after a while it did not frighten me so much. About a week after I got the snake, a stranger offered me fifty cents for it. We made the exchange. He coolly stooped to pick him off the fence rail where I had placed him. Suddenly the snake coiled itself and hissed at him. The man yell- ed in deadly fear and hot-footed it for parts unknown. It was a month before I could locate him in New York I wrote him that I would send him the snake by express. I received a letter from him by return mail begging me to keep the snake and the money. A week after that humorous but pro- fitable incident, my friend Donald Greeley bet me fifty cents that his pet monkey was not afraidof my little rattler. Well, I won that bet easily enough, because that little monkey just gave one squint at that reptile, and then beat it for the nearest tree. ■ — Abraham Bookstein, ’33 Smiles Billy Smith: “Your father has a strong box at the store, hasn’t he, Abie?’’ Bookstein: “Yeah. The one he keeps his limburger in.’’ — o — Examiner: “Suppose you were at ten thousand feet, and your plane suddenly burst into flames. What would you do?’’ Lee (Trying for Flying License): “Try to keep cool, sir.’’ — o — Willie Carter: “You say anything to me, big boy, and I’ll make you eat your words.’’ Eddie Carter: “Chicken dumplin’, cranberry sause, an’ watermelon!” Miss Cragg (In di.sgust) : “You call these shades alike? Is there anything you can match?” Miller: “Yes’m, pennies.” Mrs. Ramer (In science class): “Law- ence, what can you tell me about ni- trates?” Lamson. “Well-er-they’re a lot cheap- er than day rates.” — o — Mrs. Ramer: “Gordon, can you tell me the difference betw ' een attraction of gravitation and attrection of cohesion?” McCullock; “Yes’m, attraction of gra- vitation pulls a drunken man to the ground and attraction of cohesion pre- vents his getting up again.” — o — George: “Tell me how to make a Maltese cross.” Magnan: “Step on his tail, mum.” — o — Overheard at Seout Camp Arthur Perkins (confidentially to his brother George): “Say, George, what would you really do if you met a bear?” George: “Climb a tree!” Arthur; “But bears can climb trees, too.” George: “Not my tree— it would shake too much.”

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The HAMILTONIAN 5 as two tentacles entwined around my diving suit, Directly above me, in the glare of my headlight, a great horny beak was poised, and I recognized that my assailant was a cuttlefish. I jabbed savagely at the form looming above me until a scaly tentacle wrested it from my grasp. Water was trickling into my suit and it was with the greatest difficulty that I breathed. Suddenly the mighty beak swirled down, and then — Smash! I opened my eyes to find myself not re- posing in the belly of a cuttlefish, but lying on the fioor beside my bed. “George” I heard my mother calling, “Wake up! Your breakfast is getting cold and it’s almost time for the school barge to come!” “Petrified horrors!” I said, rubbing my eyes, “What a dream I just had! I have been obessed with the hallucination that a cuttlefish was just about to obliter- ate, and assimilate me!” “Now you listen to me young man,” my mother said, “If that is what you get from reading that horrible magazine. Astounding Stories, that will be the last magazine you are going to read for a while. Now come down stairs and eat your breakfast !” — George Magnon, ’33. How a Nickle Became a Dollar JT was on a dull Saturday morning that I found a nickel on the road. On my way home, I kept thinking of how I could make a dollar to pay for my bicycle tire. I decided to buy a fishing line with the nickel and try my luck at fishing. If I should bt fortunate, I might catch enough fish to earn the needed dollar, and, at the same time, I could spend an enjoyable forenoon. Hastily, I ran dowm town and bought the fishing line. As soon as I got home, I dug some worms and then I was off. When I got to the brook, I took out my tackle and baited my line. I fished for about an hour but no luck; for another half hour I patiently fished, then I felt a nibble. I tried to pull it in but I couldn’t. After an hour of struggling, I finally got it on shore. Guess what it was! A snapping mud turtle! I was not only dissappointed, but in my disgust, I started for home. However, on a second though, I decided to take it along with me. Knowing that restaurants often serve mock turtle soup. I though perhaps some restaurant might be glad of an opportun- ity to serve the real thing. So I stopped at the restaurant and inquired. To my delight I sold the turtle, which was a big one weighing twenty-five pounds, for a dollar. This reminded me of my bi- cycle tire, and I walked home thinking what a lucky boy I was! — Alexander Koloski, ’33. Magnon (Explaining his story to Mrs. Boyd): “There is a great climax in the last part. Just as two burglars climb in the kitchen window, the clock strikes one and - -” Mrs. Boyd: “George, be more expli- cit, which one did the clock strike. ” Student of Aviation Instructor; “Define ‘aviator’.” Lee: “One who flies a plane.” Instructor: “And ‘aviatrix’. ' ' ” Lee: “Those are the tricks he does.’’

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Joint Assembly Junior and Senior High School held a joint assembly at the Com- munity House, from 8:30-9:30 (A.M.), October tenth. The assembly opened with the saluting of the flag, followed by the singing of “Colombia the Gem of the Ocean.” Several pieces were spoken per- taining to Columbjs Day. The Junior 1 Dramatic Club presented a play, “Actions Speak Louder Than Words.” The actors were Virginia Gould, Lillian Emeney, Howard Weston, Patrick Keough, and Benjamin Robertson, all of whom played their parts well. After the conclusion of this part of the assembly, Esther Lee, the editor-in-chief of our school magazine. The Hamiltonian, came forward and spoke to the students about the school spirit which should be shown toward our magazine. She urged all pupils to show their interest by writ- ing stories and articles for the magazine. Orrin Lee, the business manager, then announced that two teams had been chosen for this year’s contest, the “Irish” and the “Scotch.” He named the leaders of each team and and then told each pupil to which team he was to belong. Each member of the losing team, has to bring a nickel to buy candy for the win- ing team! The Scotch and Irish at once began to fight. The score at the present time of writing is 106 to 88, in favor of the Scotch. Sportsmanship JN every community there is need of physical health. In order to gain this requirement we perform out-of-door sports. Therefore, many clubs have been formed in which every member works for a common purpose — to win. Very often this does not happen, then we are able to see j ust what kind of mem- bers make up the teams. The loosers should take their failures as experiences they have gained and try to correct their er- rors in the next game. These few points on sportsmenship work in very well with our Hamilton High base ball team. For a long time they were unsuccessful but were always willing to try again. Atlasta team has been selected that co-operates with its coach and works for one purpose — to win, not for individ- ual glory, but for Hamilton. The two fall baseball games have been a success for Hamilton. We all hope that they will continue with their good luck. We hope, as they become more and more successful in their team work that they will be good winners, thankful, but not boastful. — A. Newhall, ’31. Poorly Ventilated Lavatories and Overcrowed Classrooms ' J HERE are several very good reasons why the town should build a new High School, but the two most import- ant are unsanitary conditions and over- crowded rooms.