Hamilton Collegiate Institute - Vox Lycei Yearbook (Hamilton, Ontario Canada)

Page 93 text:

Christmas, 1923 VOX LYCEI 81 To the Girls of Room IV. Smith of T-I, who visits Room IV twice weekly, states that his favourite mixtures of fruits, is dates, with peaches. ROOM T-II Low-'f'Say Parish, do you know how they summon the deaf mutes to dinner at the asylum? Parishi Xo, how? Low-' They ring course. ll dumb-bells, of Seen any mysterious strangers around here lately? inquired the detective from the city. Waal, answered Uncle Wholton, there was a fellcr over to town last Week with the circus, and the dum fule took 9. pair ol rabbits out 'n my whiskers. Birds of a feather, Hunk together. Itls a long lane that has no ash-barrels. ROOM T-III Irwin- Do you belong to the army of the Lord? Rasberry- Yes, I'm a Baptist. Irwin- Ohl you belong to the navy. Mary Holmes wants to know of whom she reminds you mostWTheda Bora, or Anna Pavlowa. Bo-b Hazell is advertising the new song hit- Dirty hands, dirty face, dirty neck, by Norris Waldron. ROOM T-IV Thomas-HYou wouldn't speak to me last night, and I saw you twice. Eva Ward-'tl never recognize anyone, in that condition. Miss Lloyd- A penny for your thoughts. lChair1ie-HI was thinking of going. Mr. Lloyd-ffrom the top of the stairsl Give him -a. quarter Florence, it 's Worth it. Culver says that coal dealers don't lie, when they say, We keep good coal. ROOM T-V Douglas--''Behold me in the Hower of manhood. Coulthart- Yes, you blooming idiot. Mr. 1I2lCCl'lIllllll.lI1iNhvllflt is ia mole- cule 3 Miss Kappelle-t'Something like a flea, you can 't see it but you know it 's there. Partridge- I want the iLife of Julius Caesar. Clerk- Sorry, but Brutus got a head of you. - Thompson- See here old deah, some day I'll give you a piece of my mind. Faulknor- You 'd be foolish to divide up a little thing like that.'l Mr. MacC'ri1n1i1o11- What is velocity? Baldwin-'tYelocity is what a man puts a hot plate down with. Audrey- Say Bessie, do you want to learn to play ai violin? Bessie-' 'YVhy'? ' ' Audrey- Just to give your chin a rest. ' ROOM T-VI Miss Babcock-t'Have you any promin- ent men in your family, Miss Groves? Miss Groves-'tYes. one of my fore- fathers was an admiral. At one time he led the world 's combined Beet. Miss Babcock-- What was his name? Miss Groves4 Noah. Mr. Morrison- If I were to drop you down on a desert, how long would you, as a city bred person, live? Adamson- Depends upon how far you drop us sir. The chickens favourite-Barnes. Mr. Morrison in teaching Physics, was illustrating echoes. He called, Hello! Ken. Barnes, at the back of the room, answered Hllello! v Mr. Morrison Ccontinuingj, So now, you sec, we have all kinds of reflecting objects such as houses, cliffs and Barnes.

Page 92 text:

80 VOX Bob Hazel- Have you been drinking? Leon Goldibergh That's my business. Mr. Johnson- What is a zebra? Modern Miss Bright- A new sport model of a donkey. Can you imagine- Miss Lowriss without Mr. Haines? Miss lVoods using some of her brains? The Aneastorians eoming on time? The person who wrote this making it rhyrne? Miss XVhite Without her spit curl? Miss Batzold in the hall without a girl? Miss Olmstead with 'her hair eurled right? Miss Elliott trying hard to just look right? Miss Stevenson knowing all her work! And Miss Cole having on a long skirt? We had to write our jokes on thin paper so that the joke editor eould see through them. RO OM XXVIII. From our own point of view- Vp in the attie, On the Western side, A studious bunch Of girls reside. They study so hard Theylre all Worn out, And they know all that The teaehers know-just about. From the viewpoint of the H. C. I. boys- VVay up the stairs Ou the very last Bight, You may see Au amazing sight. Forty beautiful girls- Every one Zl. gem, And only two boys- . How We envy them! From the point of view of the teachers Of Room QS- By the time they elimb up to Room Twenty-eight, They're usually just abovt five minutes late. The girls have got tired of waiting around, Have all disappeared, and cannot be found. LYCEI Christmas, 1923 After rounding them up, from cloak room and hall, They finally get started, then presently stall. They try the old bait-they were out last night, They forgot their book, but the teaeher won't biteg And after :1 while he givrs up in despair, And lets them play eheekers, or comb out their hair. -By J. A. M. Dr. Owens- NV'ho ean tell me what race of people have blaek eyes? KJ, Cook- Sheiks, sir. ROOM XXIX. Teacher Creprovinglyl-J'When Lloyd George was your age he was head of the class. Pupil- That euts both ways, sir. When he was your age he was Prime Min- isterf' Rymal- How did your father take our engagement? K. D.- Oh, very well, he always hum- ours my most foolish whims. 77 Teacher- Now, class, find the com- mon denominator. Lang- What! You dion't tell me that thing is lost again! MV stoek-in-trade is brainsf' Hain.: You've got a funny looking sample eafse. ' ' ROOM T-I Jarvis- Say, I weigh about three hundred pounds, and these seales only go up to one hundred and fifty. Atkinson-t'That's all right, get O11 twice, and add the totals. Several first for-mers have been seen hanging around members of the H. C. I. Radio Club, with glass jars and butterfly nets. It is said, that they are trying to catch the radio bulg. Mapham has been seen on several occa- sions arm in arm with a girl. When accused, he stated, that he was just hold- ing up a. Woman's right.

Page 94 text:

B2 VOX Mr. Stevenson- What are you working at? Newman-' ' Intervals, sir. ' ' ROOM T-VII Vila.-t'It's a niee day, don't you think? A. Hogarth-- No, not on a niee day. Mr. Mc'Garvin- What speech could this not do without? Miss Daniels- The one we have for memory work. Vila to Hopkins, You've b.een here three days in succession. What's the matter? Are you sick? Wave Formation He eame to eall at half-past eight Upon a pretty miss, With twinkling roguish blue-black eyes hair waved this. and that like They sat beside the open firo And liked it too, I wis, For when he left-and it, was late, hair this Her niussed was like. An experiment in physies was not very successful, because, instead of a guinea and feather tube containing a guinea and 21 feather, it contained a washer and a piece of eloth. Mr. Morrison- I don lt know why they didn 't put it feather in the tube instead of :i piece of cloth, beeanst- it was made near the Toronto University, where there are students being plneked every yearfy BALLARD HIGH ROOM I-A. Pupil- Mr, Beck, ean you do anything no-one else ean do? Mr. Beck- Yes, I enn read my own writing. There are metres of Cambria, There are metres of Troehie, And metres of musical tone: But the metre that is sweeter eompleter, and neater Is to meet her in the moonlight alone. 1 7 LYCEI Christmas, 1923 He-'tWhy do blushes creep over girls faces? She- Because, if they ran, they would kick np too much dust. ROOM I-B Old Lady-t'Oh conductor, stop the car, my wig just blew out of the window. Conductor-' ' Never mind, niadnme, the-re is :1 switch just this side of the next station. She- My aunt accompanies me to every dance. He- Oh, sort of a tea dansantf' Miss Cunninghani-HI am going shop- ping down town. Miss Glen- Shopping? Miss Cunningham-t'Yes, I see a big shoe sale advertised. Miss Glenn- Oh! ROOM IHC Foulton, on a hike Cas he scrambles through a barbed wired feneej. VVell, fellows, I have just one more point to toueh upon. Some members of Room I-C are so dumb, they think that Harold CB-udj Orr is a mineral. Fat Dunham tafter being hit and knock- ed into a telegraph post, by a speeding ear!- Ha, ha, right on the funny bone. Miss MoVean's favourite hymn a-t 4 pm -' ' Abide with Me. Dunham- I had my nose broken in three plaees this summer. Fonelly- IVhy do you persist in go- ing to those places? Page-UI sing, a little. to kill time. C-aldwell- You certainly use ia good weapon. La. Penotiere-'twhat is more tempting than a beautiful girl to behold? Sprague- A live one to be held. Page- Going to dinner anywhere to- night, Girlie? She- Why no, not that I know of. Page-t Say, you'll be awfully hungry by morning.