Greenville High School - Chief Yearbook (Greenville, OH)

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Oh! What a School We Would Have lf- Mary O'Donnell didn't study. June Hahn never talked. Teachers didn't give tests. Freshmen acted like Seniors. Harold Baker didn't know his Latin. Ray Manix were ever wrong. Girls never gossiped. Ruth Suter ever had a boy friend . We were all perfect. No one went to his locker between classes. There were no week-ends. They provided the assemblies with beds. Mr. Wrigley didn't have such a big business. Mr. Allen ever wore a soft collar. Miss 'Warvel got a job in the Follies . Doc could get his mind off his pool playing. Miss Lindsey played basketball. Miriam Maddox-What are you thinking about? Leona Kelly-Nothing. Miriam-Take your mind off yourself. Miss Lindsey-When did Caesar defeat the greatest number? Carlton Coppock-I'm not sure, but I think it was on examination day. BIOLOGY AND BEES Smythe-Mr. Warner, I can't find the eyes on this bee. Warner-No wonder: it hasn't any head. Mr. Allen-VVhat does the Hague Tribunal do for the world? Dorothy North-The Hague Tribunal aree- Mr. Allen-Never use are with a singular subject. Dorothy. Always use is. Dorothy North-Well then, the Hague Tribunal isbitrates. farbitratesl Miss IYarvel-Where did you get all your freckles, Marjorie? Marjorie Cultice--I got them on my face. Aletha Myers to Chet Miller's sister-I hear that your brother is leading man at the picture house. She-How do you account for that? Aletha-He's an usher isn't he? IS IT NECESSARY? Charlie Deeter-The set of teeth you made for me is too big. Dentist-Thatls easily remedied, Charlie. sit down and I'll stretch your mouth a bit. Jim Markerwl guess tonite I'll start to work. Doc-What at? Jim-Oh. I took a cake of yeast this morning. Weisey-What would you do if you played a saxaphone like I do? Tubby Steck-I'd take lessons. Page one lzzrndrecl eight

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Humor ' K 'fs ' - , km 1 Q .Q - Rdiiffl The Football Season .ff flwz fp' Mi' Hlllllbl' Dr,m11'l1m'11t The main trouble with our football season was that we didn't have enough points. As a rule the goal was too far removed from us. Had we been going the other way we could have made more touchdowns because of the nearness of this goal. Another difficulty was the fact that we were tackled before we got far enough to gain any yards. They just wouldn't wait. It also seemed as though most of the boys got tired before the game ended. Every time they saw a dry spot they wanted to sit clown. It looks as if the spring fever was a permanent disease with them. The majority of the players wanted to go home to supper during the intermission at the half. It seems that the only reason some of the players went out of town to games was for the ride. During these trips it was always a favorite sport to g'uess by how large a score we would be defeated. The guesses were written on the windows of the bus and after the game the closest guesser won. It has been rumored that some even guessed as high as 125 for some of the games. On the way home it was always a great consolation to think how much worse it might have been. The only reason the players dressed for the home games was to get into the game free of Charge. We had a Ch2lllC'3 to win one game if they would have stopped when we were ahead. One of the great handicaps we came up against was that the opponents always had as many men on the field as we did. According to the law of averages fifty percent must be losers and we were that fifty percent every time. Smythe and Cornell. I Page nm' lzunflrcd svrcn

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CONFESSICNS OF A JELLY-BEAN FIEND The narrator of this article, after finally losing his unequal fight against the horrible craving which could not be satisfied. has set down his experience as a con- fessed jelly-bean fiend during one of his periods when his mind was clear. fBy the writerj To begin with, I was but a modest Senior trying hard to live up to the standards of my class. My craving started in a simple way. I was writing up my history one night when I reached into my pocket and to my horror discovered the beans. As I was having trouble trying to stay awake, I took one, as I knew that they cleared one's mind temporarily. But never did I dream that they would lead me down into the lowest depths of society. To begin with, this little object seemed innocent enough. But little did I know the horrible influence it was to wield over me. It was a black one. They are usually considered the most harmful. I remember my first stimulus from this horrible drug. My mind seemed clear. Thoughts for my notebook came faster than I could write them. The objects in the room seemed to grow dim to me. It was if I were floating through the air from evolu- tion to prohibition. Finally my senses grew dim: the walls seemed to be closing in upon me, destroying my very existence. Somewhere I heard a clock strike one, two, three, and then I remem- bered nothing until the next day. The next day I walked into a store and there, staring me in the face, were the unforgetable beans. I squandered my roll of twenty cents in purchasing some more of these habit forming beans. The second time I took the drug, the results were the same, but I noticed that a craving was growing within me for these. After I had acquired the habit my eyes became starey, and I had a haggard look. My friends were fast deserting me. Oh! How I remember the horror of those sleepless nights and restless days. At night, I remember how every object seemed to be alive-the very chairs and tables. My statue of Waltz stared right through me with its sightless eyes. Every shadow seemed to hide the grim features of the horrible shapes which I beheld. After telling me this, the narrator entered into a period of coma from which it was nearly impossible for me to rouse him. Although I heard him mumble that he wanted this to go out to the members of society so that they would never take the fatal step which he had taken. So ended the confessions of a jelly-bean fiend. Smythe and Cornell Just flu' Anszver Was Wrong Mr. Martz explaining a problem in Physics. Jean Rust-That's the way I worked it. Mr. Martz-Did I give you any credit for it? Jean Rust-I didn't get the right answer. A Question? We wonder what Roger Miller was thinking of, the day of the Miamisburg game, when he walked into the Y. VV. C. A. instead of the Y. M. C. A. A New Fact About IIIHIIIIIN Arnett-Why is there a bridge on a violin? Buck Hughes-I don't know. Arnett-Why, to get the music across. A Dist-nssioiz Bill Hughes-Say Miss Lindsey must be old. Nicholson-How's that? Bill Hughes-Cause she even taught Caesar. ll'c ljiflllvf Know Tlzvy ll'crc Raised Mr. Martz-What is a magnetic field? Lloyd Horn-It is a field where they raise magnets. Miss Murphy--What is the plural of cow? Dot Hamilton-Calves. Page mic liunclrcd niizc