Grace General Hospital - Our Days of Grace Yearbook (Winnipeg, Manitoba Canada)

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ALLERGIST DERMATOLOGIST HOSPITAL ADMINISTRATOR DIPLOMAT, CANADIAN BOARD DISTINGUISHED VISITING FOREIGN CLINICIANS UROLOGIST RESEARCH CHIEF OF STAFF RADIOLOGIST ORTHOPEDIST OTOLARYNGOLOGIST PSYCHIATRIST OPHTHALMOLOGIST h L y, '

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INDISPENSABLE Sometime when you are feeling important, Sometime when your ego is in bloom, Sometime when you take it for granted, You’re the best qualified in the room. Sometime when you feel that your going, Would leave an unfillable hole, Just follow these simple instructions And see how it humbles your soul. Take a bucket and fill it with water Put your hand in it up to your wrist, Pull it out and the hole that’s remaining Is the measure of how you’ll be missed. You may splash all you wish when you enter You can stir up the water galore, But stop and you’ll find in a minute That it looks quite the same as before. The moral of this quaint example Is — do the best you can, Be proud of yourself, but remember There is no indispensable man. Anonymous. YOU TELL ON YOURSELF You tell on yourself by the friends you seek By the very manner in which you speak. By the way you employ your leisure time, By the use you make of dollar and dime. You tell what you are by the things you wear, By the spirit in which your burdens you bear, By the kind of things at which you laugh, By the records you play on the phonograph. You tell what you are by the way you walk, By the things of which you delight to talk, By the manner in which you bear defeat, By so simple a thing as how you eat. By the books you choose from the well filled shelf In these ways and more you tell on yourself. So there is really no particle of sense, In an effort to keep up false pretense. ON SECOND THOUGHT Whatever I said in anger, Whatever I shouted in spite, I’m sorry I spoke so quickly, I thought of some worse ones tonight. A Nonny Mouse. ANTISEPTIC BABIES The antiseptic baby And the prophylactic pup; Were playing in the garden When the bunny gambolled up. They gazed upon the creature With a loathing undisguised; It wasn’t disinfected And it wasn’t sterilized. They said he was a microbe And a hotbed of disease; So they boiled him in a vapour Of a thousand odd degrees. They froze him in a freezer That was cold as banished hope; And they washed him in Permanganate With carbolated soap. In Sulphurated Hydrogen They steeped his wiggly ears; They trimmed his frisky whiskers With a pair of hard-boiled shears. Then they donned their rubber mittens And they took him by the hand, And elected him a member Of the fumigated band . . . There is not a micrococcus In the garden where they play; They bathe in pure Iodoform A dozen times a day. And each imbibes, his ration From a hygienic cup — The bunny and the baby And the prophylactic pup. ON GETTING UP I am worried till I’m weary O’er this problem grave and deep, Shall I sleep and lose my breakfast Or shall I rise and lose my sleep?! KLASSROOM KWIRK Teacher: “Where’s the amniotic fluid?” Gabby: “In the eye!” Sometimes it is better to remain silent and be thought a fool than to speak and remove all doubt. There are three sides to every question: yours, mine, and the truth. People, like pins, are useless when they lose their heads. When you argue with a fool be sure he is not similarly occupied. Medico: “Ask the accident victim what his name is, so we can notify his family.” Pro. (few minutes later): “He says his family know his name.” 78

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li i M HH Ik El • ft ; VjII ' mm jfl Mrs. Pulak: “Any questions, class?” Pondering Probie: “What’s the difference between gastric suction and gastric urinalysis?” Miss Martin: “What would be the first thing you’d do to prevent cross infection if 25 soldiers had various diseases?” Hillman: “Put them in separate beds.” Ideals are like stars: we never reach them but we chart our course by them. There are two kinds of people in the world: those who use a phone book and those who put it back. getting )itt L Jhe Jearbooh If we print jokes — Too silly. If we don’t — Too serious. If we publish original matter — No variety. If we publish things from other books — Just lazy. Like as not someone will say we got this from another Annual — and so we did. 80