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Page 24 text:
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MERITHEW (PAGE ness attended Ivebeenine College. In her spare time she distributes pamphlets which she writes on Beauty and Its Care. As a teacher, Miss McGuinness assumes an attitude of cheerfulness, although she truly says she is exhausted at the end of the day by her effort. MERITHEW, Louise Woolley, bom January 18, 1922, in Gouvemeur, New York. Acting as Chief Justice of the Supreme Court, appointed by Henry Matty, President of the United States, Miss Merithew is the first woman to receive this honor. It is rumored that she may re- sign this position to run for President in 1960 on the Scholastic ticket. She is a graduate of Mayflower School for Girls. She received her I. Q. degree from Thinkfast college in Dillabaugh City, Virginia. Justice Merithew is engaged to Phillip Lynde although she is still doubtful as to whether she wants marriage or a career. It is probable that she will marry, however, since she has been with the government ten years and is now entitled to some private life. The couple plan to make their home in Sawdust Flats where they are building a forty- room bungalow. It is said that early signs of disagreement have re- sulted from Phillip’s dislike of being called Mr. Louise Merithew. Miss Merithew’s hobby is chemistry.’ She has experimented success- fully with different kinds and colors of nail polish and anti-bee, wasp and hornet solution. She is also trying to And a convenient way of carrying school books and a way to keep from losing handkerchiefs. PERNICE, Esther Pernickity, bom May 24, 1922, in Gouverneur, New York. Always efficient with her hands as well as with her vocal cords, Miss Pernice is a teacher in the I Speaknow Deaf and Dumb Institute. Upon her graduation from Metalkmuch College, she married Jack Davidson, brilliant hop-scotch star. Miss Pernice has invented a lotion for tired fingers which she now has instead of the jaw aches she experienced when she was among people who could listen to her talk. She teaches her pupils to be competent and worthwhile citizens. PLUNKETT, Alice Angelic, born August 14, 1922, in Gouvemeur, New York. She is now residing as a philosopher in the Everrest Academy at Whitmore Haven. While still a student in high school, Alice de- cided she was wasting a tremendous amount of energy. From this knowledge she developed a philosophy which led to her present suc- cess. It is, “Never Sand Up if You Can Sit Down’’ Miss Plunkett has developed a large clientele. Society matrons, weary with their ac- tivities, come to her for aid. PREMO, Betty Queen, bom April 5, 1922, in Gouvemeur, New York. At the age of 18 Miss Premo had such a slim figure and such a per- fect Scarlett O’Hara waistline that she was employed as a model in Slimladies’ Bathing Beauties Store. Upon her dismissal there, she was hired as a model in the Richville Dress Shop for two years, but her size 13 figure faded away into a size 44 so now she has gone west to Carthage where 6he is found modeling in the Eat ’Em As You Catch ’Em Cookie Shop as head model dipping her head in dough to make animal crackers. REYNOLDS, Welby Beau, born May 12, 1923, in Gouvemeur, New York. Mr. Reynolds is a graduate of Welarnum College, Wersmart, N. Y. After a ten-year search for his dream girl he finally found and married none other than Miss Betty Drumb. He was a street clean- er for three years after he graduated from College. He then became W. C. Fields’ stand-in in the movies. In his leisure time he was a great social worker and because of his interest in and knowledge of the common people he was elected President of the United States. Each week President Reynolds gives a speech on The Common People and their Future. He is acknowledged for having done more for the people of this country in one year than former Presidents, have done in four. SCALZO, Katherine Chatterbox, bom October 6, 1922, in Gouverneur, New York. Katie has spent the greater share of her life trying to in- duce people to listen to her. She graduated from Halford’s Musical School in 1944 and has since been an employee of a radio station as announcer for Wearever False Teeth. She has also tried to be a sec- ond Walter Winchell. After several unsuccssful years at this, Katie finally gave up and became the wife of C. Jessemer and is attempt- ing to raise his seven little Jessemers. SERVISS, Robert Ypaphadtus, bom April 15, 1923, in Gouvemeur, New York. Possessing unusual ability for amusing people, Bob has at last secured a position for which he is especially fitted. He is work- ing as a radio-television star for the Seefigears Waffer Co. Robert is a self-made man. During his career in Gouverneur High School, Bob earned a name and fame for himself by wiggling his ears. Real- izing his outstanding gift, he entered contests with other earwig- glers at home and abroad, outshining them all. He is now em- ployed as a children’s entertainer on station E-A-R-S. Then because of the recent perfection of television he is able to delight the kiddies by wiggling and flapping his ears while he relates bedtime stories. SHAW, Mary Minnie, born August 5, 1922, in Wegatchie, New York. America's foremost authoress has stunned the literary world with A Shout at Midnight. Into this book Miss Shaw has put all the thrilling experiences of her varied career. Her adventures in Africa acquaint- ed us with the breath-taking calls of the King of beasts, the lion. Her travels in Northern Siberia were fraught with the dangerous encounters with the Russian wolves, as she had left her gun at home. But Mary calmly took out her notebook and noted the notes that led to fame. Miss Shaw received her degree from the University of Genoa. SPRAGUE, Hugh Bearhug, bom April 25, 1921, in Gouvemeur, New York. Mr. Sprague’s occupation was for 6 years undertaking to un- dertake people unsuccessfully. He went to school at Bigman’s Acad- emy for three years where he was known as being the Biggest Man in the school. He then went to Tallguy’s College where he graduated with honors. His marriage to Miss Audrey Bacon, a former schoolmate and friend, was broadcast from station I-M-Y’s (the program in which Miss Bacon takes the part of Baby Snooks.) After his mar- riage he gave up his job of undertaking to become a strong man in Bacon and Eggs’ Circus. If you wish to gaze upon this powerful wonder you may see the one and only H. B. Sprague perform his colossal feats of strength when the circus comes to town. STREETER, Ruth Sweetpea, bom October 19, 1920, in Gouverneur, New York. Employed as a hog-caller. She attended St. Lawrence University and graduated with an H. C. Degree. In 1945 she married H. C. Yoedel, a Russian hog-caller. They have two children, Prettypig and Hogspen. She won a St. Lawrence County champion hog-callers’ prize and she and her husband have had very successful careers at hog-calling in Nebraska. TAYLOR, Norton Snorton, bom April 7, 1921, in Gouverneur, New York. Mr. Taylor is now employed as scientist for the Research of Beautiful Girls in Gouverneur Foundation. Attended Bassett Beauty Academy. He won a B. A. degree. During his education, Norton fell FOUR) YERDON i in love with the proprietor, Miss Marion Bassett who refused his proposal of marriage because of one high official in the United States army, namely, Scott Brown, Jr. Although Mr. Taylor has been very thorough in his researches he has not found many beautiful girls. Mr. Taylor made a very important discovery, however, and that is that a woman’s beauty depends largely on her nose. He has many admirers among whom Louise Merithew holds the lead. THOMAS, Murray Pop, born August 2, 1921, in Richville, New York. Now the head of a day nursery in Spragueville. M. P. Thomas is married to Harriet Ruderman, a famous tap dancer. Mr. Thomas studied the care and training of children in the McGuinness Tots Academy at Norwood. Also he gained useful experience taking care of children at home when he was in high school. Mr. Thomas has writ- ten numerous books on child care and has developed several new types of canned baby food. He is very popular with small children and specializes in crooning tiny babies to sleep. Next year Mr. Thom- as hopes to establish nursery schools in Richville, Hailesboro, and Fowler. ULRICH, Margaret Buttercup, born January 22, 1922, in Eldorado, Kansas. Running a bus in Dierfield, Miss Ulrich received her ad- vanced education by steering Sam Foster VII through the intricacies of jitterbugging. As a hobby she has perfected a fingerwave for Ger- man Brush Cuts which many women are now wearing in place of Wind-Blown Bobs. Appearing as a torch singer in Earl Carroll’s Vanities, she strained her voice and has since been unable to utter a note. Later Margaret became a bus driver, studying her passengers’ reactions to the question, “How deep is the ocean, how high is the sky?” VANSLYKE, Barbara Coy, born May 19, 1922, in Gouverneur, New York. Much traveled in Germany as a concert pianist, Miss VanSlyke began her music career early in life, really at the age of two years, when she attempted to play Rhapsody in Blue on the piano. Since that time she has studied music in Sharp-Flat-Music College and in the Baby Grand University. Miss VanSlyke two years ago composed a minuet in O and rendered it for the first time in the Shoppe Tea Shoppe in Oxbow, New York. Now Barbara has secured engagements playing in concentration camps in Germany, lulling prisoners to sleep. WAINWRIGHT, Abigail-hail-sail-bail, bom October 5, 1921, in Ma- comb, New York. Now employed as the See-All Know-All Snake Charmer on Webster’s Farm. Received her early education in this art while following the little snake in the vale. Her power over snakes became known when she staged a dramatic incident at the Gouver- neur Fair August 19, 1942. A king Cobra escaped from its cage and went slithering into the crowd. Miss Wainwright, realizing the dan- ger that might ensue, sang a weird melody which caused the evil monster to come gliding gracefully back into his prison cell. Thus Gail became famous. WHITMORE, Robert Witless, bom March 25, 1922, in Gouvemeur, New York. Impersonating Rip Van Winkle, Mr. Whitmore has just awak- ened from a twelve-year sleep. He attended Smartsburg College, Wy- oming. In leap year 1944, Robert married Elma Bond, a patron of Wisdom and Wit. Collaborating with his wife, Mr. Whitmore is writ- ing a book The Changed World. He has lectured recently in Gouver- neur on the subject of insomnia, which he has lately though strange- ly experienced. WIGHT, Harold Mortimer, bom May 16, 1922, in Gouverneur, New York. At present he is our second Clark Gable and spends much time autographing his handsome pictures. Graduate of Lankylegs College. Is now married to his one and only Marie! He was famous as a tap- dancer (even more famous than Fred Astaire) for three years. When he is not making pictures he plays good Samaritan to rats, cats, dogs, lions, alligators by cleaning, filling and pulling their teeth. He spends many hours helping his gentle little pets and is the best animal den- tist this side of Natural Dam. WILSON, Bette Snlzzlefrltz, bom December 30, 1921, in Potsdam, New York. Employed as an amateur icicle destroyer in Caswellburg. Al- ways having thoroughly enjoyed melting ice and snow, Bette decided to create a job for herself. Having married Leo Kelly, an inventor of a heat ray machine, she successfully used this machine to destroy icicles for the Eskimos and she receives polar bears for her pay. These bears she teaches to jitterbug; she expects to tour the country with them. WOODS, Dean Stepin Fetchit, born August 12, 1922, in Gouverneur. New York. Head of a dancing school in New York City, Mr. Woods specializes in ballet and square dancing. Mr. Woods studied ballet in Europe under Professor Smoothie and received a Master's Degree in Ballet from the University of Paris. He attended classes in square dancing every other Friday night in the metropolis of Richville. Mr. Woods married Julanne Howe, New York’s most prominent dress de- signer, in 1946. They are now living in the fashionable suburb of Hawnville. With the aid of his wife, Dean has developed several new types of square dances. Also he has revolutionized ballet by develop- ing the art of dancing on the heels instead of the toes. Mr. Wood has invented a new type of face cream to conceal blushes and has made a small fortune manufacturing this product. Mr. Wood’s pet hobby is playing ping-pong. He and his wife have been national ping-pong champions for the past five years. In 1950, Mr. Woods wrote the best seller Putting Patter in the Ping Pong Paddle and now he is completing his second book Keep Your Eye on the Eight Ball, which he hopes will be even better than the other. WOODWORTH, Dorrine Sophaskininee, born April 11, 1922, in Gouver- neur, New York. For four years Miss Woodworth had a day nursery for children under five years of age. She liked especially to care for the ill-tempered squalling offspring who were always in mischief. She is noted for having turned these Satans into Angels. She recently gave up her work of nursemaid to become an inventor. Dorrine’s first invention was false teeth for kittens so that those who had poor ones could chew their salmon better; her second invention was an arti- ficial tail for bulldogs so that these poor animals, whose tails are so short, can swish away the flies in the summer. Dorrine recently mar- ried John Wranesh, the noted scientist, and they are now working to- gether enjoying the success of their combined efforts. YERDON, Robert Packy, born July 21, 1921, Gouverneur, New York. Mr. Yerdon is the first really muscular man that has ever taken up the work in which he is now employed—that of beautician. He is known as Robert, the Robust Face and Hair Beautifier. He can make beautiful anything from a snake’s pan to a horse’s tail. Women from all over the world visit this super-colossal, makembeautiful man. Mr. Yerdon has recently invented a tonic which, if taken regularly, will make the hair curly, cheeks rosy and the nails split-proof. He guar- antees this liquid to have lasting effects for at least one hour.
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Page 23 text:
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WHO’S WHO IN AMERICA A BIOGRAPHICAL DICTIONARY OF NOTABLE LIVING MEN AND WOMEN OF THE 1940 GRAD- UATING CLASS OF GOUVERNEUR HIGH SCHOOL VOLUME 40 1956 - 1958 TWO YEARS EDITED BY BOPREY, COLLINS, DAVIS REVISED AND REISSUED BIENNIALLY FOUNDED 1940 BY B. C. D. COMPANY GOUVERNEUR, NEW YORK U. S. A. GOUVERNEUR DEANONIAN STAFF 1956
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