Gouverneur High School - Deanonian Yearbook (Gouverneur, NY)

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“Prophecy is not fatalism.”—Augustine The Eyes and Ears of the World (CONTINUED) Brown is the leading attraction in Dale Reiser's Vanities. The police have given Reiser twenty-four hours to close the show. Another theatrical announcement has just arrived. “The Manning-Bailey Circus, one of the greatest tent shows ever presented, opens at the Bronx Zoo next week.” Here’s a telegram from Ossining. “John Salmon, noted inmate of Sing-Sing, has returned for another five-year term. This will make fifteen years he has served as prison chaplain. ‘The old brick-pile attracts me,’ he says.” Leo Shinnock, proprietor of the B. O. Kinney, Incorporated chain of drug stores, announces the opening of a new store at the corner of Forty-second Street and Fifth Avenue. Another spectacular divorce is being aired in the courts of Reno. Doris Eggleston demands a decree from Neil Cornaire, on the grounds of non-support. Miss Eggleston is Cornaire’s fifth or sixth wife, I forget which. While on the subject of divorces, we notice that two marriage licenses were issued today. The courageous young couples con- cerned are Miss Mary Bockus and Everett Clark, and Miss Helen Whitney and Ardon Davis. That means that the license bureau is one up on the divorce court. Great Scot! What news! This dispatch states that Bennie Saidel. celebrated hermit, philosopher, and student (?) of human nature, has moved to a cave on the west side of Pike’s Peak. He says he wants everything to look Rosy. Monopoly charges, under the Anti-Trust Act, were dropped today against Stanley Baker, accused of attempting to corner the peroxide market. He testified in court that he had not intended to form a trust. He had merely tried to get enough peroxide to keep his chorus-girl-wife’s blonde hair blonde. This lady is no other than Lisla Jobin of the Class of ’31. Two patents were recently issued, one to Miss Sallie Leach, who offers a new method of making things Shine about the home; the other to Ernest Washburn. He has perfected a device to enlarge rumble seats. Both processes are being carefully guarded. Two famous female teams have returned to little old New York. The “Hazels”, Miss Howard and Miss Streeter, have been touring Europe, lecturing on Women’s Rights, while the Misses Geisendoerfer and Dafoe have been manikins at Jeanne Rene’s establish- ment in Paris. Irma Jeffers has been promoted from operator 13 to head inspector at the New York Telephone Exchange, because of her resourcefulness and quick thinking. She summoned the fire department when she saw smoke pouring from the president’s office. It developed, however, that the smoke was issuing from the president’s favorite old briar, but no one discovered this fact until the hose had been shut off and the fire laddies had departed. News comes from India that Grace Hillis, the eccentric missionary, has succeeded in converting Bob Blair to her faith. Why bother? Now, according to the latest dispatch. “K” Smith has incorporated the Gouverneur Women’s Chevrolet Taxi Company and has opened a branch in Yonkers. Guess I’ll have to call “K” and order a cab to take me to my farm in Connecticut, and so I’ll say, “So long until tomorrow.” Ladies and gentlemen, you have been listening to Charles Jones, successor to Lowell Thomas, the Radio Voice of the Deanonian, the great news annual. Next you will hear a program of dinner-dance music by Lawrence Richardson and his Black and Blue Room Orchestra. Your announcer is LeRoy Fortune.

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“In this world none of us can have everything our own way”•—Dickens The Eyes and Ears of the World Hello Everybody: Well! Well! If the mail isn’t full of news today! I have a real treat for you. Since it is the anniversary of the graduation from Gouv- erneur High School of the now-famous Class of '31, I am going to tell you a few timely facts concerning each of the remarkable individuals who make up that group. I hope my remarks may not embarass any of the “Thirty-oners” who are listening in. Speaking of embarassment, listen to this: “Miss Ruth Canfield, noted president of the ritziest Dinner Club in Washington, rose to her feet the other evening to make a speech, and words failed her.” Can you imagine that? Among the distinguished guests present to witness her discomfort were Earl Coates, highly paid radio entertainer, who stars in Collier’s Radio Hour as Yu an Hcc See; Mrs. Bigelow, nee Florence Greenhill of Bigelow; Miss Doris Tait, the most expert tonsorial artist in town, whose favorite Bob has been universally accepted; and Maude Wells and her husband, Robert T. Clark, professor of French at the Elmdale High School. Speakers at the banquet were Normie Pickert, beloved physical-education director at Vassar, who spoke on The Value of the Daily Dozen Twice a Day; Donald Montreville, often referred to as the “Car Doctor”, who explained that autos, rejuvenated by his secret process, could be made to function almost as well as new ones; and then Miss Helen Richardson, leading officer of the Grange, discussed in an interesting manner The Range of the Grange. According to the Associated Press, there was one more narrowly averted tragedy at Madrid, Spain, today. Mrs. Maurice Bigarel. the former Marjorie Morris, who featured in the high school play Peg of My Heart and in Doris Eggleston’s Broadway hit Love on a Fire Escape, was attacked by an infuriated bull at the public arena. The situation was saved, however, by some quick thinking on the part of her husband, the toreador, who, recalling the lessons Mr. Gibbs had taught him, delivered a forceful lecture on the super- iority of Holsteins over Jerseys. After having listened a moment, the humiliated animal, a Jersey, slunk away in disgrace. Recently there was a teachers’ convention at Antwerp. Among the prominent edu- cators assembled there were Mrs. Hilton Ferguson, instructor at Little York; she is the last of the old-fashioned school ma’ms; Miss Margaret Tremlett, professor in a reducing school at DeKalb Junction; and Miss Leola Bogardus, director of square dances in Hollywood. From California have come two other personages who are being entertained in the East. They are Miss Anna Glazier, popular Hollywood hostess, and wife of Robert Montgomery; and Miss Beatrice Hull, beauty expert. Miss Hull specializes in “making up excuses” for all occasions. Now comes a startling news item. This was chosen for me by George Battersby, author of the best seller during the last decade, Interesting Women I Have Known. Mr. Battersby’s message is as follows: “Joe Ruderman, well known financier, has refused to accept one million dollars bequeathed him by an admiring friend. He has made no statement to explain why he rejected so liberal a gift. Rumor has it that the money will be turned over to charity—” Well! Well! The theatre has been looking up lately. Both the screen and the legitimate stage have witnessed an influx of new stars. Grace Henderson and Joe Huntley, the famous “Boop- Boop-a-Doop Team” recently exhibited a spectacular vaudeville act; Ardis Holland is co-starring with Clint ( Goose”) Goodison in Two in a Seat, a Static picture. Gertrude

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“We Vive and die in scenes like these 9—Moore SNAP SHOTS Page Twenty-