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SNAPSHOTS
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Page 26 text:
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“The enthusiastic and pleasing illusions of youth.”—Shorthouse. Class Prophecy (CONTINUED) Charles VanDuzee, a famous traveling salesman, went to Cuba to sell raccoon coats to the college boys. He will now announce what success he had. Jessie Jefferson married a Frenchman and went to live in Paris. She will speak on Paris After Midnight. Myrtle Wood, famous novelist, will read to you her latest book, Confessions of a Lady. Frederic Price, world-famous gangster, wrote a book during his recent sojourn to prison. He will discuss Crime, Cops, and Cells. Glenn Brown will reveal why people with red hair have tempers. (After ten years of married life, he ought to know). James Scott, a Rudy Valentino II, is a famous heart breaker; he will now explain why he breaks them, and how many he has broken. (Try and count them). Doris Love, who gave up her career as a history teacher, will tell you why she decided to become a Carpenter. Ralph McCullouch, who recently pole-vaulted the English Channel (swim- ming it is out of date), will disclose how he accomplished this feat. Alice Dygert will reveal her great secret. Sh! It is why she prefers Miller Tablets to other kinds of writing paper. Don Huddleston and Everett Littebrant wish to confess why they became honest and sold poison liquor to the cops. Bethany Bowhall’s orchestra will now play a few popular selections. Bethany plays the piano, the drums, one of the violins, and also leads the orchestra; she’s sort of an octopus, we’d say. Ruth Cox, a member of the World’s Symphony Orchestra, will play a cello solo of her own composition, entitled Love, Where Is Thy Sting? Lester Collins, a true descendant of our liberty-loving ancestors, will explain to you why he likes the Freeman idea. Roy Temple, the distinguished senator from New York State, will speak to you from the Senate Chamber on My Boyhood In Spragueville. Edna Wainwright, otherwise known as Queenie, the famous night club hostess, will lecture on How to Elude the Cops. This closes the program for this evening. Tomorrow, at 8:15 P. M., these same ladies and gentlemen will narrate for you their memories of their high school Commencement. Helen VanDuzee. Page Twenty-four
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