Gordon Bell High School - Purple and Gold Yearbook (Winnipeg, Manitoba Canada)

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62 GORDON BELL HIGH SCHOOL Down Our Alley

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GORDON BELL HIGH SCHOOL Robert Louis Stevenson got marfied and went on his honeymoon. It was then he wrote “Travels with a Don¬ key.” Miss Argue—“As we walk outdoors on a cold winter’s morning, what do we see on every hand?” Betty B.—“Gloves.” It is easy to identify the owner of a car. He is the one who, after you have shut the door opens it and slams it harder. Customer—“Your dog seems very fond of watching you cut hair.” Barber—“It isn’t that, sometimes I snip off a bit of the customer’s ear.” At the Dance Grace H.—I simply adore that funny step. Where did you pick it up. Russ G.—Funny step, nothing. I’m losing my garter. Little Johnny, whose mother was continually checking him up for swear¬ ing, came running into the house. “Mother,” he said, “is it swearing if I say Rotterdam.” ‘No, my boy,” she replied, “that’s the name of a city.” “Well,” said Johnny, “Mary ate all the fudge and I hope it will Rotterdam teeth.” An optimist is a fellow who thinks his wife has quit cigarettes when he finds cigar butts in the ash trays. Lady—“I suppose you’ve been in the navy so long you are accustomed to sea legs.” Sailor—“Why, lady, I wasn’t even looking.” Mary—“Is your husband a book worm?” Jane—“No, just an ordinary one.” Wife—“How would you like mother for dinner?” Husband—“Fried.” “I’m fed up on that,” said the baby pointing to the high-chair. Boss—“When you called up my wife and told her I would be detained at the office, what did she say?” Steno—“She said, ‘Can I depend on that?’ ” Mr. Kangaroo—“But, Mary, where is the child?” Mrs. Kangaroo—“Good Heavens, I’ve had my pockets picked.” Johnny, aged seven, gazed at the leopards for a long time and then asked his mother: “Say, is this the dot¬ ted lion everybody asks dad to sign Neil—“Does Fred still walk with that old slouch of his?” George—“No, I hear he is going with a better woman now.” Etta—“Gee, that date was fresh last night.” Mona—“Why didn’t you slap his face?” Etta—“I did, but take my advice and don’t slap a guy when he’s chewing tobacco.” George M. — “How do you spell sense?” Doc L. A.—“Dollars and cents or horse sense?” George M.—“Well, like in “I ain’t seen him sense.’

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GORDON BELL HIGH SCHOOL Helen ' s Hen(e)ry There was a young lady called Helen, Whose history was brainy, I’m tellin’; Along came a test, She wrote with much zest, But somethin’ went wrong with her spellin’. Moral—Though a Henry is a king, a henery is a place to keep hens in. (Helen Thompson) Reply to “Helen’s Hen(e)ry”— The Reason Why! “Oh, Henery, the Second, I do declare, I’ve added an “e,” to you unaware. And though you’ve been dead some hundred years My error quite moves my friends to tears!” “Now, Helen,” they said, “A ‘henery’ is A place where the baby chicks are ‘riz’; The Nursery where the hen children grow, Has nothing to do with Kings; you know.” Daughters of Eve, do “can” the din! ’Tis not such an inconceivable sin; For you’11 find if you read your history through That some kings were “eggs,” and bad ones too!!! And if Henry were here, and had his way, You might be minus a head today. As for me—he might add in a mood perverse, “Bring here the girl who composed this verse!” (Helen McDowell) Making Friends Everywhere ' A Post Card containing your name and address will bring to you a generous sample of “FORT GARRY TEA.” Write to: j|r TWsiinvTJag (Laiitpann. Wholesale Division 93 MAIN ST.