Georgetown University School of Medicine - Grand Rounds Yearbook (Washington, DC)

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B' '1 'Q fy' :- ez I-'H -11: 1 .Z -ww: I .-, :u::::.:.-1 1-i-Z: i':3'T: el- l,12fQl?S iI 5, .,,-ggjgj : ,,.,::::g.f:: fmlow' I in 12E'!5fE'..fTf:E5i- - -11' Ei' .....-M? -x 2: ' , H x 4, I 15 7 1 --1 ,1: .44 ,T Q I , .74.X3'l' . 4 il xv J ' 'x L I: xx. an -:IT ' I ' As ,LM -,Q ' I I The Port was delightful and promised a night full Uf sweet and rejuvenating reposeg It's better than Rum for that Animal Comfort, It almost invariably bestows. i Q 7, - , I x tt X 'X px I- Q IW, .X X ' X 5 I tl I' I x in I KI t X I , s ,Q I II The next I remember, I woke to an ember Uf sulfur and formalin fumes, And multiple ghouls with anatomy tools In appalling anatomy rooms, were showering blows on my Eldest of toes With machinery, tweezers, and pins, But really unique was their septic technique, And their multiple operative sins. III For no one had scrubbed and their nails were alive With a darkling, particulate dirt. And hideous stains, with the partial remains Uf a yesterday-evening's desert. Their chief was a midget and hacked at the digit With some kind of butchering knife, The pain was enough to occasion a slough And I winced with the wince of my life. IV Another one came, with an alcohol flame And a zombie expression to boot- And gleefully singed, where the sinews impinged Un the various parts of my font. And later came beavies of corpulent heavies With bumpy, exuberant ears Complaining of gripe from the succulent tripe They had downed with innumerable beers. V And wasn't it rankling when Beniamin Franklin Most suddenly sailed into sight? And bloated with mirth he descended to earth Un the cord of a luminous kite. In manner both manic and frankly galvanic He issued commands to the kite: 'You will kindly discharge an electric barrage At the Phalanx on Poor Richard's right.' VI Then Jefferson came and the Widow of Naim And Napoleon wholly in French Started loudly attacking the malady wracking Ilis toes in the throes of a wrench. llis Imperial liege was sustaining a siege At the knuckles as well as the boot. In hopes of concealing the skin that was peeling He thrust 'em inside of his suit. VII And Boswell appears, with his orbits in tears, And a Visage of Misery too. V 'What's wreaking its taunts on the Eminent Johnson Is wrecking the workings of you' I swiveled about with a terrible shout And demanded he make himself plain. 'Why this is a bout of the terrible Gout!!! That's consuming your digit with pain.' VIII By squirming and wiggles I stiffled his giggles But others continued the rite. And Negro grotesque, as a flesh arabesque . Ilad a Carnival squeezing the site. And later the scions, of African lions which Nero restrained on a chain, - were tended to graze on that tendermost place Where the knuckle had formerly lain. IX And now there approaches, in porcelain coaches, A bevy of Surgeons and suchg- - With Tunics of Satin reciting In Latin, 'Will somebody fashion a Crutch'! They finger the puls-es and someone convulses With bounteous clinical glee. 'Get wine from the arbor and summon a barber A Sawyer and Carpenter three'. X I writhed on the table and- spotted a label Surmounting a bottle of pills. Through difficult focus it proved to say: Crocus - For Boney and Skeletal llls. . - , The satisfied surgeon was humming a dirge in A state of ecstatic ferment, I tossed him a femur and leapt like a lemur Absconding the pills as I went. Xl Their color was yellow and flavored as mellow As mallow or mocha or milk And after a couple, my digit was supple As streamers of Iapanese silk. My slumber began in a regular manner But later unsettled me in my bunk, l'm bidding good day to my role of gourmet And assuming the character of a monk. I ., ,,.. I' f.tIi .fi'l. 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J OB OPPORTUNITIES if 'iv' -' 'tml' W ' -T - A . .asm CIGARETTE TASTER Excellent position available immediately for the right man. Twenty years experience necessary. Job involves smoking four to five packs of cigarettes daily. Fringe benefits include daily PE's and bronchograms. Advancement readily available as soon as white mice relinquish present positions. Salary open, apply S. Katz, Box 1.5Lg Malignant, Mass. The new Moe Thorax Placement Agency. Q Q Q Q MUSHROOMING Now big money for mushroom growers in the San Joaquin Valley. No experience nec- essary. Get in on the ground floor while the market is ripe. Your chance to be your own boss. Be a.s free as the air you breathe. Small down payment reserves three acres of highly fertile California soil with beautiful adjoining 6 by 6 foot plot for retirement. Address all inquiries to: K. Moserg Route 1Vg Metra, Cal. Fungus Inc. Employment Bureau MINERS Start at the top and work down. Coalminers desperately needed to replace older workers who have gone on to greener pastures. The work is interesting and intriguing for the man with a capacity. Look down on your fellow workers with pride in the picturesque coalfields on western Kentucky. Some math helpful to calculate tidal volume of reserve coal and diffused gradient of coal gases. Free canary furnished for safety program. On retirement receive your own engraved Bird respirator. Apply: P. Luchsingerg Box 003425 Requiem, Mass. Ann Throsilicosis Placement Bureau LUMBERJ ACK Like work with a. challenge? Excellent outdoor work now available as lumberjack in colorful pine forests of Washington. Your future is secure from your first exposure to these jolly green giants. The scenic variety will leave you breathless. Your entire system becomes involved with the happiness of mastering the nature at man's command. Re- tirement benefits include monthly mention in pulmonary journals throughout the world. Can be yours by inquiring: R. Donahoeg RFD 347 p. 132-83 Gastric, Wash. Granuloma Unlimited Employment Agency

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