Garfield Junior High School - Gleaner Yearbook (Berkeley, CA)

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A SHAKESPEAREAN ROMANCE 1. Who were the lovers? Romeo and Juliet. 2. What was their courtship like? Mid- summer Night’s Dream. 3. What was her answer to his proposal ? As You Like It. 4. At what time of the month were they married ? Twelfth Night. 5. Of whom did he buy the ring ? , The Merchant of Venice. 6. Who were the best man and the maid of honor? Antony and Cleopatra. 7. Whe were the ushers ? The Two Gentle- men of Verona. 8. Who gave the reception? The Merry Wives of Windsor. 9. What was her disposition like? The Tempest. 10. What caused their first quarrel ? Much Ado About Nothing. 11. What did their friends say? All’s Well That Ends Well. — Eleanor Paulson HO. COMPOSITION BY A FOREIGNER IN A CHICAGO NIGHT SCHOOL What a queer bird the frog are. When he sit he stand, almost. When he hop he fly, almost. He ain’t got no sense, hardly. He ain’t got no tail hardly, either. He sit on what he ain’t got, almost. “Cheer up, me man!” said an Irish doctor to the man suffering from three wounds. “Only one of your injuries is fatal; from the other two you may recover.” QUERY Four nights to the movies, And a basketball game, “Four” in my studies, And who is to blame? Can it be my teachers ? It surely isn’t ME, I wonder, yes, I wonder Who can it be ? — Olga Linczer, Night High. HOW FAST CAN YOU SAY IT? Betty Batter bought some butter, “But,” she says, “this butter’s bitter. If I put it in my batter It will make my batter bitter. But a bit of better butter Will make my batter better.” So she bought a bit o’ butter, Better than the bitter butter, And made her bitter batter better. So ’twas better Betty Batter Bought a piece of better butter. — Ramona Kercher, H8. Evelyn Palmer: Why are you leaving the party so early, Jimmy? Jimmy Norton: I have another party on tonight, and I want to get there before the refreshments are all gone. Bonnie (beginning recitation): Oh, what is so rare as a day in June ? Miss Gay: Attention in this class! Mark Morris in History class, reciting on the Ordinance of 1787: A section of land in every township must go to school. History class: Ha! Ha! Ha!

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GARFIELD GLEANER 23 THE GARFIELD ATHLETIC TEAM In spite of the fact that they were organ- ized late in the season, the Garfield football team was a decided success. Of the five games that were played, only one was lost. Under the able coaching of Jack Murphy, the team was able to hold its own with men of superior strength. Much disappointement was felt by the men because of the inability to schedule games so late in the season. Even though half of the team is going on to High School there will remain at Garfield some men to carry on the club. Saturday, November 18, the team traveled north to the Tamalpais Academy. The game played on Saturday was one of the fairest games Garfield played. The lineup for the game was: Captain, Jack Murphy, John Traylor, Mason Stevick, Ralph Kellner, Arthur Clapp, Norman Brangwin, Jimmie Norton, Walter Young, Robei’t Nation, Jack Gardner, Bayard Rucker, Malcolm Sharpe, Burnham Handling, Eldred Cooney, Alfred Anderson. — Robert Nation, H9. VOLLEY BALL After a series of interclass games the H9 team was chosen as the representative of Garfield in volley ball. The team was fast and capable and played with the well-known Garfield spirit. It played two games away from school. The first took place at Bur- bank. The game was snappy and was won by Garfield in straight sets. The next game was played at Garfield against Edison, an ancient rival. The Garfield boys went up against unexpected strength and it was only by fighting that Garfield came out on the long end of the score. The third and final game was played with Willard at Willard. The boys were a little anxious and a bit too sure. After two hard games Willard had the league won. — Arthur Clapp H9.

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GARFIELD GLEANER 25 There was a young - boy named Wall, Who said he would talk in the hall, But the teachers cried “Stop,” Which made the boy hop, And he vowed he’d NOT talk at all. • — Virginia Moles, H7. A lady’s husband died and she called on her brother-in-law to take care of the sad event but she said, “Remember, do not say anything about beer,” because they owned a large brewery and they didn’t want their friends to know about it. When the funeral services were going on the brother-in-law rose up at a critical moment and said: “We will now pass around the bier.” “If I lend you ten dollars, what security can you give me?” “The word of an honest man.” “All right, bring him along, and I’ll see what I can do for you.” AS SHAKESPEARE SEES OUR REPORTS 1 = A Midsummer Night’s Dream. 1 — = As You Like it. 2+ = All’s Well that Ends Well. 2 = Measure for Measure. 2 — = Lover’s Complaint. 3 — Comedy of Errors. 3 — = Much Ado about Nothing. 4+ = The Tempest. 4 = Love’s Labor Lost. Nature cannot jump from winter to sum- mer without a spring, or from summer to winter without a fall. Miss Gay: Willie, what is a noun? Willie: A noun is the name of a person, place, or thing. Miss Gay: That was correct; now name three strong nouns. Willie: Onions, garlic, and Limburger cheese. Mrs. Brennan: Reva, baste your shoulders together and lay your back flat on the goods. Puzzles: find the owners of these familiar remarks. “Young man, go straight down there again and walk up.” “Was it a long or a short one? Is this it? Then I’m afraid it hasn’t been turned in yet.” “Talking? Write 100 times each: miscel- laneous, somnambulistic, etc.” “Formulas, please, not rules.” (Pupil starts giving rules.) A little louder: “For- mulas, please, not rules!” (Pupil continues.) Still louder: “Formulas, please, not rules!” (Pupil stares vacantly, and sits down.) “Don’t say ‘here’ when I call the roll; say ‘ici.’ ” “Why, the little B7’s know that!” Miss Gay (teaching pupils how to open a new book) : Careful there. I hear someone’s back breaking. Mrs. Gray (to class studying meter) : Ray Depew, will you please sing those lines ? Ray Depew: I don’t think I can, Mrs. Gray. I’ve never taken vocal lessons. One word + one teacher + one eagle eye — 300 words. Beginner to Miss Arendt: Which is the tubercular key on this typewriter? Did he mean the “tabular” key? Miss Martin: Explain your example. Pupil: Find the hippopotamus of a right angle triangle whose legs are 6 and 7. Uncle Treetop (standing on weighing machine and dropping coin in the slot) : Well, Am gumed if anybody could a made me believe a nickel would a weighed as much as that! Mrs. Gray: Marion Miner have you read Freckles ? Marion Miner: No, mine are brown. Richard: I heard Miss Bonney strained her voice. William: Yes, she sang through a screen door.