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Page 15 text:
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THE PHILOMATH -Hi 13 As I went out to the street, there were Jean Lee, Sheila Finn, Jean Gechan, Dot Chiappini and Irene Day all walk- ing with Austen Moran. I later found out that they were all working for the Powell Model Agency under the direction of Steve Powell. This was the place where girls went as B-24 ' s and came out as P-48 ' s. I hailed a cab and someone yelled back at me. It was Stanley Toczdlowski, the cab driver. He told me that he ' d never learned how to drive but he liked to drive fast anyhow. After finishing a ride of sheer horror, I went into my hotel and finally to sleep. Tomorrow I would return to gocd old Framingham. The next morning I journeyed to the Boston Airport and went over to Yeaton ' s Yumping Yiminey, my plastic airplane that used air for fuel. (Mr. Bush take note. ) Having no pilot, I called the con- trol tower and asked for a complete crew to fly the plane. Soon after my crew ar- rived, and it comprised all my old friends. There were Miriam Luby, Kay Towne, Jeannette Smith and Barbara Shoup, who were considered to be the top flight fliers of the twentieth century. With a crew like this the band was content. After waiting two hours for the second fiddler to arrive, we took off for Framingham. After five long minutes we arrived in good old Framingham ( fast plane, wasn ' t it? ). There was a large crowd to greet us and give us cheers, mostly Bronx. Among them were Carl Goddard, Dario Guernieri, Dick Manning, Marie Hanagan, Mary Hill, and the number one racing car driver of the nation, Lead Foot Ernest Hed- berg. While going up Union Avenue I saw a large billboard advertising the Jack Benney of the female world — Miss Bar- bara Turner and her violin. Along with Miss Turner were Mary O ' Brien and Eileen Kceje, the celebrated yodele rs. The accompanists were those three tender young gentlemen, Tony Piccirillo and the clarinet twins, Joseph Messana and Vinnie Mislrelta. I journeyed to the high school, where I found that Donald Ephlin was the prin- cipal. It had been his one desire to be a principal, and now he was wishing to join the Foreign Legion or something worse. The school ' s math wizards, Fred and Bob Kinnarney, were trying to explain why two times two made four while two plus two made four also. These Einsteins were completely baffled. Jean McGowan and Joseph Nickerson were the heads of the English and French departments respec- tively. Both were teaching the modern slang to students who knew it much better already. I learned from Principal Ephlin that Ralph Langley and Robert Morini were generals at Washington. Arline Lind- gren was an admiral in the Marines; this explains why the Marines were the best trained branch. She was able to get things done. Desiring to see all of Framingham, I called for a special bus from the Rovinelli Runaway Bus Company, ably headed by Libera Rovinelli. Bidding Principal Ephlin good-bye, I rode to the Sudbury River Steamship Company depot, where Richard Whitney was the man in charge. He was giving his hired hands, Paul MacDonald, Robert Wood and Fred Starzyk a mis- sion to carry out by kayak while he went to the ball park with me. I found out that Whitney had been fooling the public ter- ribly. He would send his hired hands down the river in a kayak and would have them smoke cigars so that from the smoke ris- ing people would think that it was a steam- ship. At the ball park I rooted for nine innings as Lefty No-hit Morris pitched a no-hit game. ( Odd coincidence. ) I noticed that in the ball park there was a large Community Chest poster painted by the eminent artist, Albert Giardini. I finally returned to the business sec- tion of Framingham and did a little busi- (Continued on page 54)
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Page 14 text:
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12 }• - THE PHILOMATH where they were determined to hit the gong. Elena pointed out Violet Green- wood, and her inseparable Tony was still with her. Elena then returned to soothe Jack Clopeck, who had recently broken up with Mary and was now trying to heal his heart under the charms of Elena. After tipping the waitress two cents and wonder- ing if it were too much, Jack and I started to walk to my hotel. On the way we saw Thelma Marenghi, Mary MacLeod and Josephine Zichclla arguing among them- selves as to which way was the shortest to the subway; as far as I know the argu- ment may still be going on. Then in a side stree t we noticed Dot Kennedy and Mary Genesco practicing basketball for the big game at Natick the next day. Mary in- formed me that they had been practicing since morning and were about dead, but they weren ' t going to leave until they had made one basket each. On the steps to my hotel there was a long pause, and then Jack left, and I again entered my room. Virginia Pollena then tucked me into bed and saw that I had everything that I needed. The next morning Mary M espelli, who was a very successful dietitian, called me and said Bobbie Yeaton and his cele- brated orchestra were in town. So I called Norma Bernadoni, who usually knew everything, and asked where Bob was. To my surprise, I found out that he was in the same building as I. So, quickly dressing, I madly dashed to his room and pushed my way through newspapermen. We finally had a few minutes together and he said that he was making a special trip to Fram- ingham, but I ' ll let him tell you about that. Part IV. Having had the delightful surprise of meeting my old classmate, Dr. Jeanne Donnelly, I then proceeded through the crowd. Suddenly I was seized from the rear. I turned around and saw Lennie Ball and Tom Ahearn. They wanted to know if they could join the band, but I told them sadly, No! The reason was that everybody hears good bands, but I hire only the worst musicians. It provides variety and nobody knows what to expect. That night was the night for the musical quiz show. Among the contestants were Francis Arcudi, Rita Beland and Char- lie Bracken, who finally bribed me into letting him get the right answer so that he could tell his friends that he was getting more and more brilliant every day. Seeing so many of my classmates, I asked over the microphone to have all the F. H. S. grad- uates of the Class of ' 43 come up to the bandstand and we would then have them play selections for us. The first to dash up was John Furber, the noted author, who wrote How to Be a Wolf in Better Than 38 Seconds, Woo-Woo! Then came Margie Foss and her slush-pump ( trom- bone to you ) . Her selection made Tommy Dorsey turn pale and even to a dark green. The next to play for us was Joan Sander- son, the boogie-woogie queen of the piano. I found out from her that she had recently been in Hollywood, playing the female lead in Two ' s Enough, Three ' s a Crowd, I Want to be Alone! , while her leading men were Romeo Pendolari and Dick Crane (called Derrick for a lift). Sudden- ly there came a weird scream. I rushed over to see what had happened. Someone had fainted. When I arrived on the scene, there was Dr. Edward Davis, the eminent veterinarian, giving Charlie Gardner a blood transfusion from a dog, while Charlie was yelling Woof-Woof at some blonde who was passing by. Seeing that everything was all right, I returned to the bandstand and the Star-Spangled Banner was played. While playing it, I noticed that one fellow was sleeping. After he had been awakened by an usher, I knew that it was Edward Capobianco, who worked days at the Carr Automobile Factory, where Sherwood Automobile ( pardon me ) Carr was president of the company. I then left the hotel to go home and sleep.
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Page 16 text:
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14 h- THE PHILOMATH GlaU Will r LAST WILL AND TESTAMENT OF THE ILLUSTRIOUS CLASS OF 1943 We, the Class of ' 43, being of question- ably sound mind and unquestionably sound body (as witness the 1-A ' s about to be drafted), do solemnly swear and avow this document to be the expression of our heritage for those succeeding us, and for the faculty as a whole and as individuals ( for some of them certainly are individ- ual). We, the aforesaid class, leave as re- quired reading several volumes of Sir Thomas More ' s Utopia for harassed and disillusioned members of the faculty. We, the woebegone, bedraggled, and completely supine Class of ' 43, leave to the more masterful members of the faculty a treatise on the dangers of inhibited self- expression. We, the slightly disgusted and more or less hopeless class, do leave to the future editor of the Student Crier a complete set of unused ideas (which he undoubtedly will never use ) for the improvement of said publication. We, the tongue-tied Class of ' 43, leave a dictionary of original pronunciations to Miss Benton. (Written with Mr. G. D. Lundberg as contemporary author. ) We, being mindful of everyone else ' s mistakes as well as those of our own, leave Mr. Small a new gas mask to replace the old one he keeps in his office as protection against those experiments that didn ' t turn out just as they were expected to. We, having often been rescued from the brink of a test, leave a set of printed in- vitations to be sent to friends in the armed forces. ( Those who make them out should remember to state the time so that there will be a special broadcast in the middle of Mr. Bush ' s physics class.) And now we come to the bequests of a more personal but equally irrelevant na- ture. I, Lefty Morris, being in a position of popular attention and therefore feeling the need for a bequest, leave my best wishes for the incoming class. I, Mary ( Busybody) O ' Malley, leave to some similarly gifted female of the next class my ability to out-talk any member of my class. We, Basil Verdy and George Mooney (the Laurel and Hardy of F. H. S.), leave Mr. Daniels a picture of ourselves to cheer him between the innings when things look bad. I, Fred (Sheik ) Vitali, leave to some in- coming Don Juan special directions for better grooming (even how to wave your own hair). I, Red (Hey! Look at Me) Waldron, leave to an unusually lucky member of the succeeding class my knack for con- sistently doing the wrong thing and having it come out all right. I, Don ( Hep-cat ) Ephlin, leave to some nervous soul the habit of ruining teachers ' nerves by beatin ' it out on anything with- in reach. I, George (Matchstick) Reni, leave a standing offer to tutor anyone in the ' ' Reni system of dancing. This consists of lean- ing ' way over backward and letting your partner dance in a circle around you. I, Wallace (Cutie) Burgess, leave to an innocent-looking member of the incoming class a list of dumb, disconcerting, but de- cidedly apropos questions for better heck- ling earnest pedagogues. I, Lou (Adonis) Abelli, leave to the best-looking member of the next class my profile and my far-away look, which often
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