Fort Wayne Normal School - Annual Yearbook (Fort Wayne, IN)

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OUR YESTERDAYS 25 SCENE II. lime-Present. Place-On Earth. Clzaracters-Gargantua. Tsme. Students. Children. Various People. Under Tsme's guidance Gargantua visits various places of amusement, such as dance halls, restaurants, and theatres. Later he visits elementary schools and colleges. Action omitted. SCENE III. Time-P1'esenf. Place--Beyond the Beyond. Character:-Father Time. Gargantua. Flappers. Shades. Setting-Neai' the River Styx. Father Time and Gargantua approach, both seem to be much agitated. They are followed by the Flappers who likewise seemed much con- ce1'ned about something, if one might judge by their gestures, shrugs, and querulous chat- ter. As the group approaches the river they are joined by many of the Shades, both ancient and recent. Socrates may he seen slowly approaching from the distance. Confusion ensues for a time. Above the noise may be heard the vocifcrous voices of the Flappers. Sisyphus pausesat his endless task and sits upon the stone he has been rolling these ten thousand years, to watch the disorder. He seems to be the only one in all the land who is pleased with the hub, for he knows that everyone is too much occupied to pay any attention to his resp1te. Father Time Cquieting the uproarj-Gargantua has returned to tell us what he has found on earth. Flapper-I don't see why you needed to send him off to earth, we just came from there and can tell you everything you Want to know and lots besides. We know the latest dope on everything. Father Time-VVill you please speak when you are spoken to? I think I know now Why you are called Flappers. Flapper-You wouldn't get much said if nobody spoke until he was spoken to. Gargantua-I found so many queer things on earth and so many other things that I scarcely know where to begin. In the first place Tsme thought I would like to see how people entertained themselves. He took me to a place to eat. For a while I thought eating was the sole source of amusement here but I was soon disillusioned. At the farther end of the room there were a half dozen or so men playing instruments which emitted strange and fearful noises. I felt sorry for the men for they seemed to be having a hard time making the sound come forth and then when it did come the result must have been very discour- aging to them. Then the real attraction came. Some girls, evidently from the Garden of Eden, came out and accompanied each blare of noise with a special contortion. I must say I was rather attracted at first, and was about to investigate at closer range but Tsme told me to stay where I was. Father Time Cto Flappersl-Do you know anything about this? Flapper-Illl say I dog used to be there myself. Come on, we will show you what he means. CStarts to shimmie, etc.J Father Time fannoyedl-Here, here, you have done enoughg we will take Gargantua's word for tl1e rest. Gargantua-The next place Tsme took me was to a theatre. A movie, I believe he called it. You can never imagine what those poor, benighted people call a play. VVe went into a dark, stuffy, air-tight, light-proof room, we sat down and I waited patiently for the drama to start. Nothing appeared except some nervous shadows moving about on the stage, I judged these to be the actors back of the curtain getting ready for the performance. Finally I could stand it no longer so I said to Tsme, How soon will the play start? He looked at me rather queerly and said, Why, Old Top, it never stopsg there it goes up there on the screen. And they call that a theatre and a play. Father Time-Oh, Bacchus, bring back Euripides. Flapper-Say! Better page Frank Tinney. Father Time-Tell us about the schools, are they really so bad? Gargantua-Well, yes, pretty bad. The colleges seem to be all right. I rather liked the young chaps I met there. They did not mind going to classes a bit, they told me. In fact one of them said classes were a relief after the strenuous nights he went through. From that I judged that he spent the major part of the night at his studies. Poor chaps, some of them looked tired out.

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22 OUR YIESTERDAYS up for a game or two.'l NVhereupon two Flipper Flappers sat down with the ancients and began gesticulating and throwing the pieces of pasteboard rudely on a flat stone. Pretty soon all the ancients were sitting around in groups apparently absorbed in laying down these bits of pasteboard, matching the colors and chuckling quite audibly. Such a thing never hap- pened before. It was disgraceful. I remonstrated with them but it was useless. Tsme-But that is quite a harmless game, Old Timer. VVe call it pinochle, and all the old gents here on earth play it. You ought to learn it yourself. Father Time-I haven't time any more for such indulgences. But that is not the worst thing these horrible creatures did. They soon discovered the River Styx and the younger generation. You see you just cannot keep anything away from them. They looked at the Shades and then looked away again but all the younger generation started toward them. One of the creatures said, Here, you guys, I'll show you how to rook that old row-boatman out of the dead men's penniesfl Then they took something they called bones out of their pockets. But they looked very much to me like little white squares with black dots on their sides. Then the Flippers- Tsme-Fl A ppers! Father Time-Flappers would throw them down, then decide they wanted them again and would pick them up. All the time they kept saying, Seven, hurry up eleven, My child needs a new pair of sandals, And I can't supply them if I lose. VVhen I came around again all the young men were doing that and singing and making queer noises with their thumbs and index fingers. Tsme-Shooting craps. I must say you are to be congratulated on your gay young Flappers. They are there with the goods, Father Time-But they have done more than that. It makes me feel ten centuries older to think of it, These unspeakable Flappers went back to my harpists whom I have trained these ten thousand years and said to them, oh it grieves me to think of it. They said to them, That sounds like the tune the old cow died on. Such a gross insult. Imagine any- thing like that in the Beyond the Beyond. Anyway they took the harps and slapped them with their fingers so fast that you could hardly see their hands. They must be imps of the devil for everyone began to move in a sort of horizontal fashion from head to foot. As I came nearer I even found it diliicult to keep a steady step and my whiskers began to curl a little at the ends. It scared me so that I made them stop. Tsxne-Ha, ha, ha! So you learned how to shimmie. You want to watch your step or they will have you down here in the Follies. Father Time-I thought surely that would be the end of their trouble-making, so I set- tled down to take my centennial nap. Just as I got into my nrst doze one of my messengers came running up and said there was trouble in one of the schools. I Went as quickly as I could. just as I had expected, there were the Flippers- Tsme-FLAPPERS !! Father Time-Flappers arguing with Socrates. The conversation was: Flapper-VVhat do you mean by keeping these children sitting there listening to you? Let them do what they want to dog they don't want to listen to you. Socrates-How else can I teach them? Flapper-Listen at the Old Boy, how can he teach them? Why you dear, old, stupid, children aren't taught anymore. Socrates-How shall they learn? Flapperflsearn! They don't. Socrates-Do they have teachers? Flappers-Oh, yes, I suppose that is what you would call them. There is always someone sticking around to answer questions and to pick the stuff up that they leave laying around. Socrates-What kind of products do the schools have? Flappers-Look us over, Old Dear. Socrates-Oh, Death, where is thy sting? Father Time-All this that I have told you is the reason for my coming to see you. You must help me. Tsme-Of course, I'll try to help you. Things are in a bad way I'll agree, but what can I do? Father Time-I have brought one of our greatest scholars with meg Gargantua is his name. He is very used to traveling so I want you to take him with you to the schools and colleges and every place, tell him the truth about them, and explain everything to him. Then he can help us to decide whether to do as the Flappers want us to or not.

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24 OUR Ytisriinnzxvs Flapper-I'll bet he never told you what he studied. Second Flapper-Did they tell you what the Latin race was? Gargantua-No, what is it? Flapper-It is a race between the pony and the prof's goat. Gargantua-I don't quite follow you. To continue, the little fellows in the grammar grades seemed to be having a good time. I asked one of them to read to me but he said he couldn't then, he was busy with his project. l watched him for a while. His project seemed to be that of filling a sieve full of sand. As I was in a hurry I did not wait for him to finish. Everyone in all the schools seemed to be having such a good time. They evidently need music to write with. I watched them one day and they had a box on legs that played whenever they wanted it to. Then they would all write furiously until it stopped. They must learn quite a lot, too, for I asked some of them one day what they knew and they said they knew everything and the price of it. At any rate they all seemed to be having one grand time. as Tsme would say. It was all very different from our school. The teacher did not ask the children any questions they did not know, and the youngsters did most of the talking. I did not hear a child give a discourse on anything. The children did not have to mind or pay attention as ours dog each child seemed to do just as he pleased. Father Time-VVell then, you would say that things are not as rosy on earth as the Flap- pers say. You think that the children do not have proper training and that most of the people are unenlightened. - Gargantua-VVell, not quite as bad as that-but not so very good. Father Time-Then you think we better not change up here? Gargantua-Maybe we have been too hard on the youngsters, but otherwise, I think we better leave things as they are here. The people on earth need some of our things more than we need some of theirs. I should think it would be a great relief to get up here to peace and quiet after their noisy music, showless shows and garrulous people. Father Time-But what will we do with the Flappers? Gargantua-Tsme suggested that we use them to help Saint Peter. There is nothing they don't know or won't find out, so they can take the arrivals through the Beyond the Beyond and show them what a fine place it is. They can make anybody believe anything. Father Time Cto Flappersl-How would you like that? Can you make Beyond the Beyond as rosy for the newcomers as you painted the earth for us and keep them all as busy until they get accustomed to things as you have us lately? Mind though, no more of your new-fangled tricks. Flappers-,lust watch our dust! CLASS OF 1920 Vs. CUPID Two score and Five months ago our Normal School brought forth in this fair city a new class, conceived in intelligence and dedicated to the proposition that thereafter our matrimonial chances were one to ten. Now we are engaged in a great conflict, testing whether that proposition, when applied to our class of such superior intelligence and pulchi- tude, can long prove true. Forward into battle, we, the eleven graduates of this class marched, flinging high our banners, cheered and inspired by our watchword, Men may rome. For a space of thirteen months, with unbroken line, we boldly advanced, successfully dodging the arrows from Cupid's ranks, and securing a fair share of the spoils of war. ,lust when victory seemed most certain, we were ambushed and when the smoke of battle cleared, our ranks were depleted. Captain Gerard, no longer a Miss, was reported missing. Privates Scott and I-Ialler were seriously wounded. The rest of our company now seek the most exposed positions along the battle front, fearing and hoping that our names will appear on the next list of casualties. The world will little note or remember what we say here but the teachers of the Normal School can never forget what we did there. V Though the class of 1920 may have differences of opinion on many subjects, we are one in our devotion to the Fort Wayne Normal School. Our loyalty we pledge anew. Each added year but helps us to more fully realize that by her teaching and example, Miss Wilber has inspired in us a desire for more knowledge and higher ideals and a truer American citizenship. To all these sentiments we subscribe, Not one word would we blot. Standards and ideals are prized By Johnson, Bryson, Scott, Sherbondy, Pohlmeyer, Ulmer, too, Beahler, Gerard, and Glover, And Phipps and Haller, classmates true- Fort VVayne Normal School-We love her. ' -LAURA PHIPPS.