Field Kindley High School - New Direction Yearbook (Coffeyville, KS)

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TLGMJEG' Oh, piffle! Have you heard of the Daring Darn Needle- who scales the buildings like the fly, and just finished one of the greatest wonders of the world? Why, Zelma Padgett fell over Niagra Falls in a barrel, didn't you hear the-splash? If you remember, my friends, Allen Hodshire was a rather elevated young man, in fact, he has become so elevated in his latter days Ctraining his pet parrotsj that he has a tree-top bungalow. You see, Folks, great minds run along the same way. Now there is Chester Johnson and Louella Wills, two scientists of the day. Louella has invented an Essence of Paper Mill Perfume and Onion Vanishing Cream and Chester, through his experience with astronomy, has announced to the world that the Sun comes up in the West. Rosella Johnson, 'tis queer to me, but she's the Turkish Queen you see. The Sultan was so stricken by her beauty, he has been cross-eyed ever since. Wayne Stumbaugh suddenly developed a voice. In making a natural fall in his latest opera Faust, he fell so hard he broke his Vocal Box. Vernola Fitzgerald, did I hear you say ?-why, she and Ruby Fry have joined Barnum Bailey. Vernola developed a liking for apes and Ruby could not resist the Jockey Riding Habit. Speaking of animals reminds me, Billie Tatman is a Lion Tamer in the African jungles, as well as an African Woman Hater. Isn't it perfectly natural, he always had such a Winning way. Madame Lucille Renner is now in Switzerland giving lectures on her perfected violin. She is accompanied by Margaret Hart, the celebrated Swedish Ventriloquist. Hazel Ruthrauff is dressmaker for the Honolulu Queen. She remarked in her latest letter she found her work to consist mostly of space with a few trimmings. Aubrey Neal is universally known as the Dancing Bell Hop. He finds his Work very adventurous. Lela Varney is now the State Demonstrator of Domestic Sci- ence. Her ability to fry catfish without injuring the cat, having obtained her the position. l9l 1921 g 121 4.1

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I'--WWI fFf1Q51iQG Madame Ninetta Sherwood is a foreign Hairdresser in Africa, showing the natives the latest spit curl and introducing the perma- nent Ocean Wave. Virginia Lang, I just heard the other day, is the leading dancer in Hawaii. She is noted for the Hawaiian Straw-Dance. Lawrence Tuttle inherited a harem on the South Sea Isles. They say he took possession immediately. And Eva Maloney, I knew you'd want to know, well, it's too bad, you see, but things will turn from bad to worse and finally fall, you know. She is the Bad Desperado Leader of The Flashy Five, who are indulging in robbing people of their Sunday School pins. Carl Hudson is a prominent artist now. Much of his honor and fame is due to the wonderful charm and natural beauty of his little French Poser, Mademoiselle Beryl Sanford. Virginia Irvin-shh! be still! She's one of the Five. Bob Belt and Robert Hovis have the monoply on the manu- facture of Granite Sofa Cushions and Concrete Bicycles in Dearing. John Young is now the editor of the Coffeyville Daily Lies, the latest scream. I read recently where Hilton Douglass, the new electrician, who is improving the Electric Vibrator, became so tickled while using it, that Dr. John McGuire had to be called to remove the sensation. I met Charles Long, who is captain of the gigantic Salmon Fish Boat on the Pacific. He tells me Cecil Livingston, who al- ways admired the sailor's life, is now scrubbing decks on the U. S. Gunboat in Panama. She is the first woman to receive this honor. Virginia Nelson, the latest Paramount Movie Star, is playing opposite Clem Luce in their new comedy, Kiss Me Quick and Co, and Let Not the Right Hand Know What the Left Hand Doeth. Wilma Pierce, experienced in the fine art of vamping, has a permanent class in old C. H. S. On account of the hard times, Elsie Sheehan and Sophia Kun- kel have decided to open up a hole-less Doughnut Shop in VVest Coffeyville. They say they will soon be multi-millionaires. Can you imagine it? 191 1921 I2l I..-J

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CILIIMIEG Audrey Merrick has a taxi line between Liberty and Inde- pendence. A fine aviatrix she soon will be. You go up in a hurry but you're never sure just what time you'll come down. Helen Miller and Susie Jamison are prominent leaders of The Verdigris Valley Cake-Walk Association. During their last as- sembly Edwin Whitehead, the Professor of the Glow-Worm Strug- gle Dancing Academy, gave them a lecture on The Lightness of the Sole. Lucile Gise has won the World's Championship for Golf Playing-she is the only woman who can hit themark. In fact, she knocked the ball so hard in her last tournament, she knocked the wig off John Miller, the famous man who trained the canary to swim and the goldfish to sing. Ralph Cammack has a Red Star Grocery in Kalloch. Folks, you could never guess who I saw in Chinatown this summer behind a Chinese Bric-a-brac counter, why, Helen Lambe, dressed in Chinese clothes with a rose in her hair. I always knew she admired the Chinamen, but how could she stand the smell? Now there's Jessie and Mary Peters, two modest little lassies who got their skill together and published The Rubes Dictionary. Mary rendered the slang, while Jessie administered the uncivilized definitions. Olive Hines is the leading saleslady in Egypt for the Madame Helen Church's Beauty Parlor of Boston. Olive's complexion has slightly changed, they say, she has become so dark, the light- ning bugs follow her around in the daytime. Minnie McCabe, since she lost her seventh husband in France, has given up all hopes. Her last resorts are a pet monkey and grind organ. Paul Richardson is now decorating Bird Cages in the Canary Isles. Gladys Powell is called the Wild-Eyed Detective of New York Slums. Lotus Dawson owns a large millinery store in India, making as her specialty Hand Painted Chicken Feathers. Lela Carey has charge of the Information Bureau on Love and Privation-Union Depot, K. C. Marie Ehart and Hazel Waddell are earning tehir way around lil 1921