Farmington High School - Laurel Yearbook (Farmington, ME)

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es THE LAUREHL Mooar, and others of the lads on my left. On entering high school they found the change too much for them. There was no watchful teacher at their elbow every mo- ment to see that they kept their eyes on their work. As a result they spend one hundred and five per cent of their time gazing listlessly about the room. Oh me! If only they would be indus- trious like Arlene Crosby and Margaret Hamilton who work busily every day writ- ing note after note. Now many of you know from experience that you can't act that way all through high school and get good rank. Remember, you're setting your study habits now. If you habitually do the things I have described, you'll probably al- ways do themg but it isn't too late to mend. just say to yourself, Do I want to be a second Joe Colburn and spend the best part of my life here? That's a good thing for all of you to think about. You freshmen have completed your iirst year. For most of you this year seemed fairly easy. Everything ahead looks like clear sailingg but let me tell you. if you sit hack and relax, you won't be sitting on this platform three years from now. As for you sophomores, many of you are already slipping down the well-greased slide that leads to failure. Next year start digging in your toes, and maybe you can climb to a perch nearer the top. You juniors have come to your last year. When you come back next fall, you're going to realize you've wasted a lot of time in the last three years. For the first time many of you are going to work to make a record of which you may be proud in school activities and in lessons. Well, I've said my say, and my finale is I'm just an old codger with gems of adviceg I've given them right from my heart. And thus, in the future, I know you'll think twice, , - So now, with your leave, I'1l depart. ' PVilliam Starbird '3'7. ADDRESS OF WELCOME-CLASS DAY SING the words of Robert Browning in the Pied Piper of I-Ian1e1in I say, Welcome- Fathers, mothers, uncles, cousins, Families by tens and dozens, Brothers, sisters, husbands, wives. There, that should complete the welcom- ing job. I am going to roll back the curtain of time for you to 1923 or '24, the year when your George and your Helen loosened their clutch of your apron strings and stepped hesitatingly into a new world. VVe can see Sonny Austin's mother care- fully pinning on her chubby son a huge handkerchief, the presence of which he oc- casionally forgets, for we see him briskly rubbing his troublesome nose on his coat sleeve. Sitting mournfully on a bench is Leon Odell tearfully watching his mother's re- treating figure. Standing beside the gold-fish aquarium is Miss Iola Perkins, our primary teacher, laying down the rule to Alden Littlefield who obstinately persists in grabbing the gold-fish out of the bowl. Our last mental picture is of Alzaleen patiently submitting to the ordeal of hav- ing her long white tresses combed for oh -well-the umptieth time that day. A number of years rolls by and we see a crowd of gaping freshmen entering the portals of the high school. There's Wal- ter Ranger plodding awkwardly up the steps and bumping into Clymena who has nonchalantly loped through the wrong door. Coming in the other doorway are the in- separable twins, Nettie and Ada, Nettie with her distinctive laugh and Ada with her air of I'm cute and I know it. In Mrs. Bryant's home room George Chapman is in the front seat darting his roguish, alert eyes about the room. In an- other front seat is our shy, unassuming Miss Smith. Four years have rolled by, and here we are on the threshold of a new world to

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THE LAUREL 27 wished, doing the thing he wanted to dog but his homespun philosophy will live on forever, and the world is thereby blessed. Elaine Tibbeits '37. I YT ADDRESS T0 UNDERGRADUATES ACI-I year it has been the custom for a member of the Senior Class to give advice Qgood, bad, or inditierentj to the undergraduates. Unfortunately this advice in former years has gone unheeded by those who have needed it mostg such as, Clymena Colburn and Hugh Campbell. Perhaps the cause of this disregard is the youth of the speaker which would discount his worth as a counselor. 'Tonight I have come prepared to remedy this situationg so if you will be patient, we will allow a few seconds for the wheels of time to turn. QGoes to exit. Puts on beard and wig. Returns.j The weight of years now hanging heavy on my shoulders, I feel it my duty to give you young whippersnappers down in the front seats the benefit of my mature w-is- dom. I'm not going to talk just to make my whiskers wiggleg so sit up and take notice. First, I must say that I clon't know what the younger generation is coming to. In fact, I don't know 'wlicn the younger gen- eration is coming to. Some of you seem to be in a perpetual daze. At the end -of every study period a friend must lean over and awaken one of you sleeping beauties. Almost every day I have seen Nelsie Aus- tin's head slowly sink to his desk and re- main there peacefully until the bell or an awakens him. Why do they of too many When anyone unfeeling classmate rudely And he is only one of many. sleep? Probably because extra-curricular activities. participates in so many outside activities of the school that his scholastic standing has gone on a sit-down strike, his program can't help being unbalanced. I suppose you wonder how I occupied my study periods in my youth when I wasn't watching people sleep. During the course of my studying I unconsciously used to massage the underpart of my desk. Suddenly my fingers would become en- tangled in something soft and sticky. It was a plastic piece of gum someone had left behind him. Not content to disturb the study hall with his constant chewing, this vile gum-masticator put temptation in the way of others. Ask Mutt Benson if people who chew gum and leave it under desks should not be exterminated. O n c e I - er - er - a young friend of mine found a very pliable piece of gum and in a moment of weakness inserted it in Mutt's unruly lock of hair. In a short time, hair and gum were as in- separable as Phil Morse and his arguments. Finally Alden Littlefield came to the rescue and with a jerk, left Mutt minus both lock and gum. Those were the days! Umphl But don't any of you do anything like that. Remember, crime even in the bud doesn't pay. If a word to the wise is suflicient, a hundred ought to be enough even for an undergraduate. I I went to the zoo the other day, and while I was there a rather peculiar thing happened. I closed my eyes for a momentg and from the chattering and gobbling I heard, I thought I was back in school days and in one of the corridors while classes were passing. I imagine you make just as much unnecessary commotion as we did. It is bad enough when you ask the person next to you if he didn't think that test was hard and what the answer to the third question from the end was, without yelling from the bottom of the stairs to the top in the manner of a hog-callerg and Pearl Metcalf, if you must exercise your lungs there are many athletic games at which a good loud voice ringing across I-Iippach field from the cheering section would be appreciated. Maybe some of the seniors are wondering what to do next year. There is an oppor- tunity for some enterprising persons to get jobs as nursemaids for Phil Hoyt, Skinny

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THE LAUREL 29 conquer. We realize that without your pinning on of handkerchiefs, scrubbing of faces, washing of ears, combing of hair, and doling of money, we would not be here. It is you, after all, who have been wor- ried by our low marks, our lack of inter- est in our school life, and the blindness of our inability to see things your way. For the gray hairs and added wrinkles of which we have been the cause, we are truly sorry. Now we are anxious to show you what we have prepared for your entertainment this afternoon. The curtain has rolled down on the past, and we are now in the present: so Welcome to Our Class Day. La-urcncc Luce '37. -rr ORATION Cutting the Cables of Crime S we pause to compare our United States with foreign countries, we see that we are progressing educationally, socially, and economically at a much more rapid rate than any of the European coun- tries. Yet, when we make our comparison with crime as our yardstick, the United States, the most progressive country in the world, boasts a homicide rate twenty times that of Great Britain, and more than twice that of Greece, Austria, Germany, Switzer- land, France, Norway, Sweden, Spain, and the Netherlands. The number of murders in this country is prodigious. On an average there are thirty-seven murders committed every twenty-four hours. We may more fully comprehend this situation when we take the words of a well-known authority who says, Unless there is a drastic change in our present system of dealing with crime, three out of every four of our present popu- lation, unless they die young, will be per- sonally victimized by crime. A We may divide the various forms of crime as found in the United States into two classifications: respectable crime, and unrespectable crime. A bank robber is rep- resented by a lawyer of questionable repu- tationg while a bank oliicial, guilty of em- bezzling more than the robber could have taken in a dozen loots, can command the cream of the legal talent in the country. This situation does much to promote crime, especially among the richer classes. One explanation for our crime record is that many police forces in the United States have low standards. In certain cities these forces are composed of highly-trained men, but in the majority of cases they have received little or no training. They are sadly inefficient, and hence are no match for the criminals. Moreover, they work under handicaps. The police of one city or county can not always cooperate with the law-enforcing body of another district. Criminals fleeing from justice heed no city, county, or state lines. But the oliicers in pursuit must stop at the borderlines, because their authority ceases when they step out of their jurisdic- tion. There are a few state police forces which ignore county lines, but most states do not maintain such forces. In cases of kidnapping and certain other types of crime, the federal agents may take action and totally disregard local jurisdictions. However, most law-enforcement work is done by local agencies and under the handi- caps just mentioned. It is an unfortunate fact that many local governments are 1'un by political bosses who give the criminals protection in return for contributions to campaign funds. Accord- ing to Courtney Riley Cooper, who has made studies of crime in towns and cities in all sections of the country, There are not twenty first-class cities in the United States which could come through a search- ing inquiry, free of political interference, without at least a dozen persons of so- called prominence in each community being headed for the penitentiaryf' Take this for what you may, but I. Edgar Hoover, the noted chief of the G-men, also expresses the opinion that corruption in local politics is Public Enemy No. 1.