Fairhaven High School - Huttlestonian Yearbook (Fairhaven, MA)

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20 rHE HUTTLESTONIAN Laborer—And have they tall build¬ ings in America, Pat? Pat—Tall buildings have they? Faith, Mike, the last one I worked on we had to lay on our stomachs to let the moon pass. —The Record. Teacher—What is the plural of mouse, John? John—Mice. Teacher—Correct. Now the plural of spouse? John—Spice. —The Widow. Professor—What is density? Student—I can’t define it, but I can give an illustration of it. Professor—The illustration is good. Sit down! —Juggler. The first number of the daily pa¬ per issued by Henry Ford, the motor car manufacturer, had a dashing headline across the front page: “What Can We Do for Suffering Humanity?” A rival paper had an answering line next day: “Put Another Spring in the Cushions, Henry.” —The Automobilist. During a dust storm at one of the army camps, a recruit sought shelter in the cook’s tent. “If you’d put the lid on that camp kettle you would not get so much dust in your soup.” “See here, my lad, your business is to serve your country.” “Yes,” replied the recruit, “but not to eat it.” —Brown. A visitor said to a little girl: “And what will you do, my dear, when you are as big as your mother?” Said the modern child, “Diet.” —Tit-Bits (London). Dr. Mackintosh took a trip to Buf¬ falo recently where he was presented with a parrot. Doc believes he knows all about parrots, and under- » took to teach what he thought to be a young mute bird to say “Hello!” in one lesson. Going up to its cage he repeated that word in a clear voice for several minutes. The parrot at first paid not the slightest attention. At the final “Hello!”, however, the bird opened one eye, gazed at the man, and snapped out, “Line’s busy!” —Life,

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THE HUTTLESTONIAN 19 A Memory F ROM out of the somewhere into the glow Of the setting sun, came a memory dear, And I stood enthralled as it faded slow, For the memory to me had brought a tear. A book, a rose, a ring, and then sorrow, The sun sank low in its golden bed, But no promise of a fair tomorrow Came with its rays of purple and red. Alone I gazed far o’er the ocean’s crest, The purple and red reflected there Dimmed, and were lost in its white foamy breast. Ah! deep in those depths lay my memory fair. The evening star from its sunset bed Shone forth with glory and radiant light, Deepening the shadows as the darkness fled, Flooded the earth with God’s love and might. Flooded my heart with a deep peace and love, Lifted my cross,—and no fear I knew As I raised my eyes to that star above, In grateful thanks for that memory true. MURIEL CHAMBERLAIN, ’26.

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THE HUTTLESTONIAN 21 “If a farmer has four thousand bushels of wheat,” said the teacher, “and sells them at sixty cents a bushel, what would he get?” To which a pupil enthusiastically replied: “An automobile!” —Ladies’ Home Journal. “Oh, Mrs. Brown,” exclaimed the newly married next-door neighbor breathlessly, preparatory to borrow¬ ing some supplies she was temporar¬ ily out of: “Do your hens lay good eggs?” “Well,” Mrs. Brown replied con¬ sideringly, “they haven’t laid a bad one yet.” —Ladies Home Journal. “Eliza,” said a friend of the fam¬ ily to the old colored washerwoman, “have you seen Miss Edith’s financee?” Eliza pondered for a moment, then bent over the laundry tubs once more. “No, ma’am,” she said, “it ain’t been in the wash yet.” —University Press. It was Mrs. Foley’s first ride in a taxi, and she watched with growing alarm the driver continually putting his hand outside the car as a signal to following traffic. At last she be¬ came exasperated. “Young man,” she said, “you look after that car of yourn and watch where you are going; I’ll tell you when it starts raining.” —Punch. Man—Is New York the next stop? Porter—Yes sah; brush you off sah ? Man—No, I’ll get off myself. —Western Christian Advocate. Teacher—What is “can’t” the abre- viation of? Freshman—Cannot. Teacher — That’s right. Now, Johnny, what is “don’t” the abrevia- tion of? Freshmen—Doughnut. —Selected. “Why the difference in Pullman berths?” “Well, you see the lower is higher than the upper and the higher price is for the lower. If you want the price lower you have to go higher. They sell the upper lower than the lower. In other words, the higher is lower. Most people do not like the upper although it is lower be¬ cause it is higher. When you have an upper you have to get up to go to bed and get down when you get up. You can have the lower if you pay higher. The upper is lower than the lower because it is higher. But if you are willing to go higher, it will be lower. Take your choice!” —Club News. “What is your profession?” “I was an organist.” “What made you give it up?” “The monkey died.” —The Tiger.