Emmerich Manual High School - Ivian Yearbook (Indianapolis, IN)

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12 THE BOOSTER fluent because of the liquid conditions of his chief sensory organs. Noises caused by ids oracle orifice produced the following announcements of the freak inside: He neither eats, sleeps or drinks, but lives entirely on cigarettes. We slipped in and were not surprised to see Sherman Lightle as the center of attraction. Cecil Bird was teaching a Pink Rhinocerous the Zoo Dialect. Janet Moats was performing some Strong Man stunts. The juggling of typewriters was the most worthy of mention. We stepped into a bakery at the next town to get a bite to eat which proved to be a bit because of the deprivation of full value to the public in Albert Hart- man ' s placing holes in doughnuts. Upon leaving I paid two bits for our bite to Pearl McDaniel, the cashier. We stopped at a farm-house after leaving the town to get water. The door was answered by Florence Wacker. In our conversation she pitifully told us of her marriage to Dan O ' Connor, who had sued for divorce and obtained it on the grounds that too much attention was centered on Robert Uhl, the butler at her former city home. Her income was due to alimony which was being used for buying milk for her much needed beauty baths. In a paper lying on the table, I noticed a picture of Katherine Fisk, a recent star in Max Sennett ' s comedies, who after strong competition with Rose Saperstein succeeded in vamping Perry Nichols, the Shall Be Husband. Mr. George Thormeyer and wife, formerly Marie Ziegler, were the hired hands at the W T acker vs. O ' Connor farm. Anna Weaver won the beauty prize at the county fair, Alma Williams second, Edith Meyer, third. The honor constituted the prizes in value. Goldie Beck won six electric curlers, to be used in her beauty parlor which is patronized by all the beauty prize winners, for the most popular lady in Homely County. Mr. and Mrs. Strain, whose name was Maude Hitchcock before the said catastrophe, were living on the adjoining farm raising poultry, principally sparrows, black-birds and crows. Emil Harmeson ' s better half was said to have been lone Bryant. In Chicago we junked our car in Paul Adam ' s air liner station to have it con- verted into a planet conveyance. Paul informed me that Otto Wickstrom had made a fortune by consolidating ministry and shoe repair. His money was deposited in a Sand Bank on the Nile River. A sign on his shop read We Mend Your Souls and Heel You. Lillyon Snyder had changed her name to Wickstrom. Otto surmised that Hazel Bowman, Hortense Smith, Evelyn Gaddie, Irene Turner, Anna Richardson, Lillian Wood, Chavous Gardner, Postelle Vaughn and John Motely were students of Tuskeegee College of which Leon Saunders was president. Postelle Vaughn and- John Motely were studying dramatic art. Shortly after leaving I met Mamie Gebhart strolling through the streets and alleys. She said that since the Broadway Theatre at Indianapolis had closed she did not know where to pass the time away and had become very lonely because her plighted lover, Victor Helm, had deserted her. She told me that Irvin Heidenreich was teach- ing Toe Dancing and that Norman Wise was his assistant. The method used was Other Peoples ' Toes. Lillian Rosenthal, Caroline Carle and Henrietta Copley joined the Salvation Army. Alma Whitely, Helen Rosebrook, Alice Parker, Daisy Duvall, Edna Habeney and Ruth Kingham had formed an Old Maids ' Syndicate to forward Synthetic Foods. Passing through Water Street, I noticed Hyman Kamisky running a commission house, hash house, second hand store and a dealer in auto parts in a combined store. The menu board read: Ice cream and sauer kraut, boiled watermelon, hair soup, cowless milk and sandwiches at Palm Beach. I entered and ordered ice cream with castor oil flavoring, the waiter being Norval Stellhorn and the Soda and Soup Slinger, Geraldine Goodwin. I put up for the night immediately at Hyde Park Hotel where in all his glory and high ambitions stood Raymond Damaske operating the elevator. He had devoted his life to solving the following problems unsuccess- fully: How many angels can stand on the point of a needle? If one should stand on the edge of space and protrude his arm horizontally, where would his arm be? If a man stood in the center of a sphere twenty-eight feet in diameter with mirror walls, where would the reflection of his face stop and begin reflecting his hack? He had been forced to work because of failure to receive royalties on an invention of a perpetual motion machine. The invention as described by him cleaned the shoes, clothes, teeth, and combed the hair all with one brush. He seemed to be under the influence and effects of this combination brush. Edna Melvin and Saul Klein were the violin soloists on the roof garden of the hotel. I spent a delightful night with the snakes and angels, due to the sundae I ate on Monday; the following day was spent on Mars where Alberta Bernd was secretary for Jabo, the president of the Ethereal Space. Revenge I sought, but a doped ice cream soda I got. Class Facts Robert Uhl President Viora Frye Class Poet Lillyon Snyder Vice-President Pearl McDaniel. .Banner Arm Band Alberta Bernd Secretary Magdalene Eberhardt Pin Emil Harmeson Treasurer We Ourselves Must Paul Habbe Historian Pilgrims Be Motto Will Wetter Prophet Coral • • Color Josephine Renier Will-Maker Aaron Ward Rose Flower

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THE BOOSTER 1 1 PROPHECY By Will Wetter UPON being exonerated by His Honor William Jennings Bryan, pies, of the United States in 1941 where I was an inmate for a couple score of years because of sedi- tious remarks said to have been made concerning my classmates by me in prophecying their future, ray natural instinct was to get ' em by an Act of Malice. A word of the past and present will give you a better under-standing of the contrasting situations and conditions which existed then and are now existing in the past. Life was a complicated matter, for instance, the Habeas Corpus Act was not known else I would not have been subject to the aforesaid fate. In those days houses had roofs on them and the people lived only on the face of the earth. Today we are living not only in subways but on the earth and in the atmosphere as well. A visit to the planet Mars, Luna, or Old Sol which was not thought of in those days is now as common an oc- currence as the movies were then. The R. R. running on a horizontal plan was their means of travel, while today travel is done on a vertical plane from planets to earth. I dedicate this to Mr. Bertram Sanders, the Universal disciplinarian, who after strong competition with Wilhelm our noted janitor will be a future Principal of E. M. T. H. S. Leaving the sanitarium on foot I walked down Broadway for a few squares where I noticed a group of children gathered around a middle aged man pushing a shovel-like contraption a few feet from the curb. On investigating, I found Handley Caraway try- ing to prove a scientific point to the children that friction produces heat, by manicuring boulevards. Directly across the street I noticed a delapidated shack with a sign painted on the window, John Long Novelty Shop. You tell ' urn ' s a Specialty. On entering the shop I was met by Lillian Maschino and Dorothy Guntz, who immediately recognized me and sprung some of Long ' s wit upon me. You tell ' em appendicitis you ' re always on the right side. You tell ' em Wetter you ' re always dryer. Ycu tell ' em June July. John then introduced me to his wife, formerly Dorothy Wilson. They informed me that Carl Wundram was serving a life sentence in Sing Sing because of a murdei which he committed by Shooting Seven in a Craps Game, and that John Elstrod had gained great reknown as a Bigamist, the unfortunate women being Coleta Duncan and Belva Thompson. I borrowed two bits and left taking my right with me. I then caught a jitney bus with a sign on the windshield, From Coast to Coast for Five Cents. I looked to see who was driver and there sat Edgar Rugenstein. He told me he was advertising for Henry Ford by making cross country runs and that he left for Chicago at eight the next morning. I looked around to see who the other occupants were and met the eye of John Bray, who told me he was just Braying around and gave me a complimentary ticket for that night ' s performance to the Hippodrome of which he said he was the manager. We got off and entered the Knickerbocker Hotel to wash. After being shaved by Julius Harris we sat in the lobby for a few minutes. We heard a bell hop page Chang Lee. Remembering the name we called the page and told him to send Mr. Lee to us when found. Chang told us he was running a laundry on the Bowery and that some of his em- ployes were Magdalene Eberhardt and Margaret Kluger, both having lost their hus- bands by trying to pass over Niagara Falls in a barrel. I then journeyed to the Hippodrome where I found that my complimentary tickets entitled me to a seat on the first floor from the roof. The play bore the title of Read ' Em and Weep presented by the Seven Galloping Dominoes. The leading lady was Martha Gooch, the hero, Fred Buddenbaum, the five minor characters were Viora Frye, Ethel Heid, Ina Bush, Esther Fiddelman, and Rosa Koor. The orchestra and fowl insulting odors of eggs and vegetables awakened me by playing, In the Galleries of Memories, as two deaf and dumb mutes, the only two persons who had remained to see the finis of the performance were passing out. On reaching the street I was confronted by George McNeely selling newspapers called Extra! Big sensation, arrest made! I learned from George that Paul Habbe was editor of The Friday Picket Fence formerly the Saturday Evening Post. The details of the arrest were that Arthur Landes was operating a Toad Farm three inches wide and one mite long. When the toads became full grown he would follow them with a bucket and catch and save the Hops. Revenue officers are said to have charged him with violating the Prohibition Law. Another article stated that the tardy problem of schools had been solved by a recent invention of Elizabeth Davy and Mary Homburg. The system involved was placing pneumatic tubes under the ground, similar to drain pipes, which were connected from school to every student ' s home. When the child is almost tardy he is pitched into the tube and arrives to school immediately. George ' s policy was to Spend your money and sleep in the streets, which we did that night. We were awakened next morning by Josephine Renier in a police- woman ' s uniform who, by the treating we received, must abide under the Divine Law, Treat ' Em Rough and Tell ' Em Nuthing. I met Edgar Rugenstein the next morning so as to receive full value for the slug I gave him the day before which passed well for a nickel. While driving through a little Jerk W ' ater burg, we were hailed by Leonard Sprecher, w r ho spoke the native tongue. He was advertising a circus in a flexible condition due to the Kick of a White Mule. We laid him on the floor of the car and drove to the circus. Here we found Clarence Hoy as a Side Show Yeller dressed in that color. His line was (Continued on Page 15)

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Diary of a January ' 21 Senior With due Apologies to Sam Pepys and little Benny By Paul Habbe, Historian Introduction. What is a class history that it should feel obliged, to ramble ov«r two or three precious pages of the Senior Booster? Could not a. page or two be saved by a concise history and be used more profitably. Since we all agree, let ' s begin: March 23. The whole show commenced with that famous Now folks, go aiow in your selection of officers from Miss Knox. Bob Uhl ' s famous presiden- tial countenance triumphed, and that now exalted individual strode forward without a bit of embarassment. Lxilyon Snyder won the honor, vice-president job, and Alberta Bernd was chosen to keep track of what we had done and what President Uhl thought we had done. April 7. Emil Harmeson, Manual ' s premier athlete, almost unanimously was put in charge of our millions. April 21. Contrary to the examples set by preceding classes, the fellows heioically allowed the girls to choose a nice, soft (?) coral ribbon. May 7. Margaret Kluger ' s pin design was chosen but then on May 12. Miss Knox explained that a two-piece pin would not only be more expen- sive but would also be impractical. So it was that Magdalene Eberhardt ' s individual, simple but unusual design was chosen. May 14. We entertained June ' 20 with farewell dance. May 19. Miss Knox suggested that we think over Ivy Day program during summer months — which, of course, we did. INTERMISSION. October 6. Some excitement. Four ballots and still no president elected. October 7. Robert Uhl re-elected president on fifth ballot. It ' s certainly too bad we have universal suffrage. October 11. Just see how much we did today: re-elected Lillyon Snyder vie- presi- dent; Alberta Bernd, secretary, and Emil Harmeson, treasurer, chose William Wetter to satisfy our curiosity as to our future life, and Josephine Renier to appropriate our funds to such worthy causes as a dancing teacher for the Roines Club; and (almost the end) appointed Ivy Day committees. October 25. For some reason we chose a class flower — the Aaron Ward rose. Maybe the girls expect the fellows to Say it with Aaron Wards on Com- mencement eve. November 2. (Ivy Day) The Ivy Day exercises, in spite of the fact that the pro- gram was made up at the eleventh hour, were an unusual success — so was the dance that followed. November 29. Bretzman was chosen to do the dirty work. It seems that the girls believed that he could make them appear different from the way they really look. Of course, the selection of a photographer was of no concern to the boys. December 17. Thanks, Junes! Almost as good a dance as we could have Sylung. January 12-13-14. Four performances of the biggest and best class play ever seen at Manual — and no exaggerations. Katherine Fisk and Otto Wick- strom are sure some players. In closing, the January ' 21 class takes this opportunity to thank publicly Miss Knox, Miss Gawne, Miss Perkins, Miss Williams, Miss Ernst, Miss West, Mr. Barn- hardt, Mr. Weigler, Mr. Winslow, and Mr. Holloway for their help and guidance to us through our Senior year.