Emmerich Manual High School - Ivian Yearbook (Indianapolis, IN)

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i.GdOOBRD Uncle Josh ' s Town Adventure (A told by himself) B The only time I went to town, I tell you I was done up brown. The first thing I desired to know, Was what was in the big depot. So I pushed through the swingin ' doors, And ambled o ' er the marble floors, Until I run aginst a box That wouldn ' t stand a storm of rocks. ' T was mostly glass ; some printin ' said, ' Bell, tell someone ' s cow, ' it read. I couldn ' t see whose cow to tell, But who e ' er ' twas, he couldn ' t spell. As sure as I ' m alive I know That cow aint spelled just plain c - o. Upon the door in brilliant hue, Was pictured off a bell in blue. Now I can ' t see an earthly thing, In a door-bell that you can ' t ring. The blamed thing was so strange to me, I thought I ' d loaf around and see If something would turn up that might Relieve my nerves and set me right. And by an ' by two fellers came Right up to me and I ' ll be blame If one did not go in that box Without so much as tryin ' the locks. And I peeked through the glassy wall To see what I could see a ' tall. And there he stood before a thing With bells that looked as if they ' d ring. He dropped a nickle in a slot And held something up to his knot, And ' gan to talk out of his head. You ought to heard what that man said : ' Gimme the National Bank, ' he cried, Then waited and looked satisfied. This scared me out, I turned away, So I could hear no more he ' d say. I hadn ' t waited long about, Before he came a waltzin ' out. 1 Did you get it ? ' his partner cried. When he said, ' Yes, ' I nearly died. No bank I saw, but then I guess That they would send it by express. ' Spent five cents and got a bank, ' I sought my purse ; my spirits sank. A gold half eagle therein lay, But nickle, none to my dismay. Then suddenly old Josh got wise, My blasted hopes began to rise. ' A nickle made it rich for you, I ' ll see what this gold-piece will do. ' I spake ; and ' fore you could say, ' Bean, 1 I was in before the durned machine. I dropped my fiver in the slot, Took down the thing and let her go got. I heard a buzzin ' in my ear, And something sweet said, ' Number, dear. ' I thought, ' Old man, your chance has come, «GOODW

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The last Saturday of our outing came and all hated to say goodbye to n Our Huckle-berry Man as we called him. One of the campers got out his kodak and asked permission to take a pidure of the berry-box, seeking under that pretence to get a picture of the hermit, when to his sur- prise, the recluse seemed pleased and asked to have a pidure sent to him addressed to Will Cox, Star Lake. The camper with interest said that his name was also Cox. He replied that his name was really Wilcox but that he called himself Will Cox. Afterwards when one of the party was showing and describing camp pidures, to a young lady, the story of Wilcox was listened to with great interest. The young lady then related a story of two brothers who were students of Michigan University. They had been hunting in Wisconsin a number of years before, one brother staying longer than the other. There they had lost trace of him and had never been able to find him. The father and mother had both recently died and the estate could not be settled. She was corresponding with the older brother and would write him, sending the pidure and address of our hermit, in hopes that he might be the one. Inquiry was made and our hermit proved to be the long-lost brother. He agreed to return so that they might settle the estate. When this was done he accepted but a small sum of money and made his way back to his cabin in the solitude of the northern wilderness. His was a sensitive nature, one that craved the melancholy of the still pine forest and wild lake, happy in the heart of nature with his books and forest pets. And this ' his ' life, exempt from public haunt. Finds tongues in trees, books in running brooks. Sermons in atones, and good in everything. MABEL AYRES At the Sign of Two Fingers F COURSE it was June. No well regulated fishing story ever deviates far from the months of June or July. The ° broad river n very naturally flowed peacefully on, the feathered songsters warbled, the glorious sunlight streamed through the luxuriant verdure of Nature and flashed and danced on the n broad bosom of the river. Any long-haired poet, strolling listlessly near, would have heard lessons and poems galore ° whis- pered from the lips of Mother Nature. Strange to say, however, these beautiful surroundings made not the slightest impression on two small beings, attached to poles and sitting on a log. These were not lads, nor were they happy barefoot little urchins, but simply a couple of kids who had sneaked away from home at the sign of two fingers. These boys did not sit silent, patiently waiting for the finish, but cussed thoroughly because they got no bites. Later they got tired (not weary with the day ' s sports ) and lay down on the log to rest. In stead of dreamily planning their happy futures, these little villains read from the adventures of Jesse. James and blew cigarette smoke in each other ' s face. Finally the evening came. (The darkening shadows did not deepen into night ). It simply got dark and the boys started for home on a double quick. Now the pace of one was not retarded by one of the B numerous cares of childhood, but by a good-sized boil on his laig. On reaching their homes these little truants were not met by a loving mother n with a kind heart and a sad face but were confronted by the ole man, who was hoppin ' mad and armed with a broomstick. He did not plead and endeavor to show them the error of their ways, but encouraged them up the stairs and to bed in a way that was a ° caution. Even here the boys did not lie sobbing in each other ' s arms but bawled lustily until they heard the tread of their daddy ' s boots on the stair when they shut up and went to sleep. So ends the story of a day ' s fishing, so common-place as to be unusual. JOHN KRAFFE $

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Now make the best of it, by Gum ! ' And in a voice I thought was right, I yelled away with all my might, Gimme the world and all that ' s in it ; ' And someone answered ' In a minute. ' 1 waited with expectant joy, Feelin ' like a circus boy. I heard a rattlin ' and a hummin ' , I sang out, ' Glory ! hear it comin. ' But, suddenly, there came a smash, My hopes was blighted with a crash. I thought my time had come to go, And things looked black ; I felt as though, I ' d heard a thund ' rin ' boomin ' noise Like the glorious fourth and all its boys. A snappin ' and a crackin ' too And I begun to feel real blue. And then ten thousand red hot devils Seemed to curse me in their revels. I thought they ' d kill me then and there They seemed to dig out all my hair. They pinched and bit and scratched my face Their seething brands I felt them trace, My arm felt like ' twas full of needles My stomach full of pinchin ' beetles ; A million sparks passed ' fore my eyes, I felt myself hurled toward the skies. Then to earth like a meteor spark, I struck the floor and all was dark. I came to in the calaboose, The marshall wouldn ' t let me loose, Till I paid fifty dollars fine For damage I had done the line. This course then I resolved to foller To cut it straight for Bean Pole Holler, And here I be, and here I stay Sure as my name ' s Josh Hornaday. WALTER GUEDEL The Great Football Game 1TELL you, boys, that was the greatest game that ever was played. For weeks beforehand, Saunderson, the captain of the team, had kept the squad hard at it practicing for this game. n Sandy was a great believer in the theory of training. He always ate raw beef and soft boiled eggs, and in training or out never ate any fruit. He liked fruit once, especially apples — that is, other people ' s apples ; but a dog cured him of that. Once he was making an accelerated exit from a farmer ' s orchard and a dog bit off a large piece of Sandy. Next day Sandy went up in chemistry and got Harley Rhodehammel to put some soothing-syrup on the place. Harley said he thought it would get well though it was a bit sore now. Harley always was getting off things like that, but he never meant anything by it. Sometimes he had to draw diagrams to help explain the finer points of some of his jokes, but when the demonstrations became intricate he used to call in Bee Diddel to help him. Bee was great in geometry. He was always absent when the lessons were hard and always recited when they were easy. Consequently he flunked very seldom. Bee was not a lazy boy, but he did like to sit down in mechanical drawing. He would always lower his table clear down to the lowest notch and then he would scratch around until he found a box or something to sit on while he worked. Mr. Bronson finally had to hide everything that could be sat on and then put a clamp on Bee ' s table so it couldn ' t be lowered. George Emminger said that if