Emmerich Manual High School - Ivian Yearbook (Indianapolis, IN)

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AN ACCOUNT BY A NEW REPORTER A mad dog escaped on East Washington Street this morn- ing and bit a boy, he set his dog on it and the owner came out with a stick and whipped another man ' s dog by mistake who threatened to have him arrested and as they had taken off their coats and were about to settle the quarrel at once, a policeman arrested the boy, the two men and the three dogs. The judge first questioned the boy who said that the man that owned the dog that bit him had allowed it to run loose, and after it had bitten he had set his dog on it, he came out to whip it and whipped the wrong dog and the other man whose dog he had whipped had threatened to have him arrested and also the man who had whipped his dog and the other man ' s dog. He next asked the man whose dog the boy had set his dog on and whose dog the other man had had whipped who said that his dog had got loose and the boy who had set his dog on it had teased it and it bit him and he set his dog on it and his dog being bigger than the other dog he went to help it and whipped the other man ' s dog who came out and threatened to have him ar- rested. The judge being a little puzzled then questioned the man whose dog had been whipped by the man whose dog had been whipped by the boy ' s dog. He said that he did not know any- thing about it except than the man whose dog had been whipped by the boy ' s dog had gone out to whip his dog but had whipped his dog by mistake and they were just getting ready to settle the quarrel when a policeman had arrested them all. This was also the new reporter ' s last attempt. WILL SCOTT, June, ' oo.

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SOME TEACHERS, WITH APOLOGIES

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ERSONAL PARAGRAPHS PAID FOR PRIVATELY Just published and on sale now, The Art of Kicking as Applied to the Intellect, by J. P. Frenzel, K. I. K., Kickers ' College. J. W. before Sands may be taken in different ways. It could very pleas- antly be Judge Wilford Sands, but, more appropriately, Jay Windy Sands. An ordinance against expectorating on the street could not touch Rob Yoke. His collars are so very high that such an act would be impossible. The latest report is that our dear brother Herbert Moore is insane. He is not dangerous, but all he does from morning till night is to mutter, Oh! what will we do about our concert? This has been the case now for over a month. The rumor is that Elizabeth Steinhagen ' s last theme was marked ' A, ' — Double Plus, X, Y, Z through the ceiling to the sky point. The main problem now is to invent a mark high enough for her next one. Say! Is there any truth in the report that our own dear Senior Albert Richt is to take Theodore Thomas ' s place as director of that gentleman ' s orchestra next year? If that is so, maybe the next graduating class can get the orchestra for their final concert. Wouldn ' t that be nice ? If the degree of intellectuality is determined by the intensity of one ' s frown, we poor mortals are unfit to associate with Will R. Ballard. Some one said that Herman Scherrer got such a quantity of solid geometry, trig onometry and higher algebra into his head when he was a small boy that the weight ever since has been so terrible as to render all further upward growth impossible. The English VIII class was seriously disturbed the other day by a loud noise in the right hand side of the room. It was dis- covered that one of Wildhack ' s German Jokes had cracked ahead of time. Poor boy; he couldn ' t help it; it wasn ' t his fault. What if Sand ' s windpipe should get stopped up or burst. Wouldn ' t that be a calamity?