Ellsworth Community College - Web Yearbook (Iowa Falls, IA)

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in huh F lg-:X 'A I , 5 , IH E f ',,. f am Wig W , Z: 5 . '-- -.x. vi, ,,,,f' zfaxwwlfflnxuul' K ,, 5 V ,fH WW ..nuumlM.xmm , .,jlF' ,Z s, llll IIAVVA , 'VW4 X I U ng LFB111' illitearg Page The Web has the extraordinary pleasure of presenting for the first time to the American public a most wonderful series of literary productions. Three young writers of great fame have very kindly consented to have their produc- tions used on this page. However they are very modest and do not wish their names revealed. The first of these is a snappy short story entitled Heat1ess Daysf' Heatless Days. Sissle! Sissle! Sist! Our drowsy minds awake to the fact that the hands of the clock point to 6:30, and the heat has been turned on not many minutes before. With a pang of desperation we put our feet on the carpetless floor and arise with trembling limbs and chattering teeth. A delightful feeling of shyness comes over us as we look upon the chilly depths of that wash basin, but the deed must be done, and we set forth as conquerors to our next seat of joy. Oh what an incomparably pleasant shaky feeling courses up and down our cool- unquiet spines, as we await the opportunity to speak one word of conversation between shakes. With qualms of fear we raise our cups of luke warm coffee to our pale lips, fully expecting a deluge before it again reaches safety in its saucer mate. The milk is the crowning joy, for with it we have the favorite dish of our childhood days! ice cream. The next production is a beautiful little poem pronounced by an Ellsworth professor to be just exquisite. It is entitled The College Library. The Ellsworth Library is made of red brick Built on a wall, of stones, very thick, The roof consists of bright red tile That can be seen for almost a mile. The rows of books look very inviting, Some are philosophical, some exciting, Some time each day we find our rest, Reading the things which are the best. The scene of many happy hours Is in that library of oursg Oh may the moment ne'er arrive When we for reading will not strive. Our third masterpieceis a wonderful essay showing marvelous depth of thought and power of expression. It is entitled An Exposition on the Evils of Study. An Exposition on the Evils of Study. An evil which is becoming a painful menace to the welfare of the bodies, minds, and souls of the Ellsworth freshmen. is the unreasonable desire of the instructors that they should spend a great amount of time in that nerve-racking, heart-rending practice- called study. Study has a strong tendency toward demoralizing the young, tender, unsophisticated brain of the freshman. From the standpoint of the health of the body, it is a very dangerous thing. We might cite thousands of instances where it has driven its subservient slaves to a sad, premature state of physical ruination. Then, there is the health of the mind. Even now, having experienced only a few short months of college toils, we see those who show growing symptoms of disease within the human campanileg or, perhaps a portion of the contents has been entirely eaten away, leaving only a blank cavity, or air-space. Finally, there is the soul. Everyone knows the change which is apt to take place in this organ when it comes in contact with this deadly vice study. Cases have been known where individuals have actually seen the very gates of the fiery realms, simply through books. Some of us seem to have already become aware of the evils attending study and are staying as far away from it as possible.

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e - P' ' Z' I 1 I 5 27 IW. ' lg WEB if TPv Maw ?.E iI 1 daaa iik0'alvW'Ng .urrrzlnflfrfmxxxxxuww - ,,..,,. . K 1 s ! I It +f-- ........- 1 HHH .S 'HC' WI W fowl 9 -ff! 4 Gbur Ahuediaemeniz WONDERFUL NEW DISCOVERY DR. MITCHELL DISCOVERS NEW TONIC Dr. Mitchell has gained world wide fame with her new tonic Kayla Ipplef' Testimony from a noted editor. One dose of Dr. Mitchell's wonderful New Discovery completely cured a bad case of fits caused by a failure of Student material to appear on time. Signed, Adolphus Kermut Lien. LEGAL NOTICE Residents of Caroline Hall are notified that wearing of men's hats is hereby forbidden. By Order of the Committee. WANT ADS. WANTED-A date. Wallace WANTED-A twenty minute Burrows. chapel talk. The Student Body. WWAIXLTED-A P0 ny' Shag WANTED-A chance to see all 1 'in the good things the censor deleted from the Student and the Web. WANTED-some hair. Dave. Everybody. 88 - WANTED-Remedy for giggles. Emma Jaycox. THE BOOK STORE ANNOUNCES THE FOLLOWING POPULAR BOOKS Good Stories to Tell Your Classes by Prof. Reynolds. Filled with the cream of the rich ones. Moonlight in the Tropics, or Love's Sweet Song by J. E. Magee Very touching. A Bostonese at Ellsworth or Harrowing Adventures in the Wild and Wooly West by Charlotte Maxson. Very thrilling. The Problems Solved or How a Handsome Young Man May Safely Teach Classes of Beautiful Academy Girlsl' by Glen C. Smith. A learned discussion of this popular subject by a noted authority.