Ellsworth Community College - Web Yearbook (Iowa Falls, IA)

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'HE' 2 WEE J an EE E E 2 lllv M 00 A A ' Z IWIW W 5725! THE POPULAR DISEASE AT ELLSWORTH

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gl ' I 5 5 lm-Fx Q ,,,f I ne w was , 3- JM: ..., ,,,.. . i ff, . Z ffwlwly -qA -.----- f md. .5 ml1n'5 mlm at 35112-luurilf' A Being the latest most unauthentic biography, collected from all unavailable data, of the celebrities of that renowned institution. Greutzmacher, Herald-better known as Griz . Born somewhere a certain number of years ago. He was funny from birth but it took some twenty-five odd years for people to find it out. Jester-in-ordinary to the Princess May. Seems to have been born a few years too late, a middle-ages monarch would have given him a cap and bells, and his present jokes would have suited that period to a nicety. Once Joke Editor for Student but was fired at end of thefirst year because of complaint of the oldest subscriber that one of Griz's jokes made him laugh. Nevertheless Griz is the longest laugh-maker in, Ellsworth. He bids fair to replace Gabriel with his silvery trumpet call. He com- menced his musical career when extremely small and always yelled in chordslof the diminished seventh. A successful yell-master, always yells when he feels like it. Leader of Ripsnorter Jazz band. His sarcasm, 'tis'said, once bit a nail in two, And yet his gentle glance a lady fair did woo. Arnold, Lionel, otherwise known as 4'Benedict. Born at an ungiven date. He lisped in numbers for the numbers came. The modern Soloman. Knows more about the outside of his text-books than his teachers know about the inside. Favorite haunts Chem. Lab., Annual Room, and the Little Brick House on the corner. A literary lion, a Demosthenes and a fusser. Author of essay, Bombs versus Boquetsn also poem, E'en tho he be an Editor, a man's a man for a' that. ' Laipple, Kathryn, known as Kay. Born several years ago of parents engaged in the syrup business which accounts for the well known sweetness of her disposition. Nevertheless is much interested in War. Has decided that her Mis- sion in life is dispersing Old Sol's children throughout the world. A musical artist rivaling Paderwiski, the only difference being in ability. Also a noted singer be- ing able to rock the whole Hall with laughter by her magic voice. Favorite key, low dough. The laughing Queen. A bold suffragist who has a Billy which shecan use upon occasions. Author of Let the Lower Lights be Burning. Reynolds, Carrie-well-named for she carries the whole world's burden upon her slight shoulders. Little, but oh my! What nature deprived her of in feet and inches she added in energy and vim. Carrie is a veritable bookworm, for she lit- erally lives with books. She must be well acquainted with terra firmay' as she is a fine rooter. A Latin Shark. She believes she can teach young America to rehearse hic, haec, hoc, huggus, huggus, huggusf' A spirited debaterg could out argue Arnold himself. Though she seems very modest and demure-beware! She is apt to be Trickey. Johnson, A. Ray-Born-Date unrecorded. Was born with cashbook and ledger under his arms, could calculate compound interest when four months old. A poet of renown. Was formerly a successful banker but was bankrupt when

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f at .Ha a ,.,. 2 g et an , 354 g f ---..,...g,' .Q 'f ,,,f ' ligiwvmllnxuw m 5g A 5 ' i ..ul1l1llr11:1.ymmvw W ,,gn1-' 'mg ,G 4... '.'.- f'f ,f,iX-H' g ' - gi AWN , ....- -- fm.. .5 ll 9 his wife's hat bills were turned in. Of late hehas been employed as floor-walker in the Junior Department of the Johnson Establishment. Though of a musical turn of mind, he is said to discourage his young hopeful's tuneful UD propen- sities. A. Ray is also a debater, having studied debating and argumentation un- der Prof. David H. Munson and having perfected it under the able supervision of Mrs, A. Ray. Author of poem t'My Lost Youth, also essay Junior Discipline. Lien, HA. Kay -originated sometime in the past. A very precocious child- cursed the day he was born. He is a famous cartoonist, ranking only second to Ding and his little dog. He was very early attracted to journalism and ate printer's ink in preference to candy in days of childhood. He is deeply interested in the Study of Nature-especially Human Nature. He has never been to war, yet' he is well acquainted with the smell of 'fpowderf' A. Kay is an adept at the art of juggling. He can keep the Editorship of the Student, Presidency of Student Body, Cartoons, French and a couple of girls all up in the air at once. Author of The Prettiest Girl in Ellsworth, an Intensive Study, also an ethical aesthetic essay on Prunes. Paulson, J. V.-Born in Denmark, 1885-Spent some time in native country, but soon outgrew that small land. Came to U. S. A. in 1890 thinking he would have room to expand fully here. Chief engineer in one of the largest Manufac- tories in Michigan for some time. Became Business Manager of the same firm and was the originator of the business methods now used by all modern companies in the world. Health failed and he moved on to a farm in Iowa where he recup- erated. Left farm and then was secured, fortunately for Ellsworth, to assist in running the college. While at this work he divided his time between the man- agement of the college and the study of nature as he became a great lover of nature While on the farm. A few of the things he has introduced into the Col- lege are: latest means of Hooverizing, latest means of fussing, and most modern means of making dates. His study for the most part has been devoted to aquatic forms of life. It is nothing unusual for him to spend several hours with his Hook in some quiet shady nook along the Iowa River. While fishing one day he caught a Leach and became so interested in this form of life that since that time he has devoted most of his time to the study of this peculiar fam-ily. Many of treatises have been published and they are surpassed only by some of Plato's and Aristotle's works. Nothing but fame is expected on the young man by his many friends. He is the author of that noted monograph, Why I believe that Leach is the Most Beautiful Creature in the World. Osee, Oscar Begosh, born two or three years ago in Norway and transplanted at a tender age to Iowa. Responded vigorously to cultivation, shooting up at a rapid rate. Is a hard worlzer when anyone is watching him. fNote-Our detectives never saw him when there was no one watching him.J Renowned for his wonderful ability as a pianist. Can spread the glad look over his handsome young face. Oscar Begosh is very ambitious and would like to get Prexy's job as he is well adapted to the administration office. He will get his Mark in the world some day. Likes the movies especially the side attractions. Owens, David-Born in the woods but left as soon as he could. Worked on an ostrich farm in California until the ostriches took too great a fondness for try-