Ellis School - Ellisian Fields Yearbook (Pittsburgh, PA)

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Class Prophecy Fifteen fruitful years have passed since that pride of Ellis, the Class of '48, left her cloistered precincts to face fortune's dizzy dance. Time has made but a slight impression upon this group, their bonds of friendship are entwined forever with the hallowed memory of the hallowed years passed together in the wild days of their adolesence. One sunny morning in June, some of the aforementioned damsels left their respective walks of life to take a peek into the private lives of their former class- mates. In the course of their travels they unearthed some choice bits concerning them, about which they had to confess a certain curiosity. The first stop they made was in a lonely rural district of the Alps, where they came upon a brood of six child- ren, romping in the yard of a rambling shack of forty rooms. Inquiry revealed this to be the humble abode of the former Miss Anne Allen, wife of the brilliant archaeol- ogist, Baron Von Cruncher. Amid the din of her various babbling offspring, they discovered that the Baroness herself was a renowned archeologist. They found her face streaked with dirt and her hair in wild disarray, and were unable to distract her attention from the all engrossing work of digging. Finally, from the unintelli- gible mumbling of her offspring, it was understood that she was excavating the bones of her long lost lover, Roberto Bakero, from beneath the stones of the mountainside. Upon arriving in Vienna two days later, they found that the famous 'cellist, Madame Feodor Mikhailovitch Dostoievsky III, formerly Miss Joanne Fisher of Pittsburgh, was making a tour through Austria, and was giving her first concert there that night. When they finally saw her, she confessed that she was going to play the difficult Till Eulenspiegelu by Strauss, and would be the only performer ever to play it as a 'cello solo, instead of the customary violin solo. Her husband, Mikhailovitch, in the meantime, was back in Russia trying to write a sequel to The Brothefs Karamazov just to please his darling Joanne. Soon after that, they spent a week end with the Marquesa de la Suanque O'Halligan-better known as Miss Caroline Browne, in her charming villa on the Riviera. The Marquesa, who is now spending the winter with her fifth husband, is starting work on her memoirs about the preceding four, which, from all accounts should prove interesting. At the same time, she busies herself by dabbling a bit at painting, and running a French Oldsmobile agency. While on board a ship on their way back to America, they received the start- ling news that the scientific girl with the bangs, Miss Joan Carson, has just out- maneuvered Einstein. Upon arriving in Mt. Lebanon, she revealed to them in a private interview how she had discovered that the missing linkn doesnit equal X at all, it equals Y. Which, if statistics don't lie, is going to shake the fundamentals of algebra throughout the world! And poor Miss Soule, what will she do? Their next stop was made at Rolling Hills in Lexington, Kentucky. On these sunny acres they found Mrs. Casper Milquetoast purring sweet nothings in honeyed tones into the ear of her favori-te thoroughbred. Mrs. Milquetoast is the former, dashing, Miss Joanne Cherrington of Sewickley. She, her husband Casper, and their two children, Pall and Mall, have the largest stables in the country, and are the South's foremost authorities on horse breeding and tobacco raising. Later, as they were having tea on the patio of a charming countryside inn, they suddenly heard a whirring sound from above, and the next thing they knew, there was a terrific crash in the middle of their table. As they looked, astounded, they saw a weather-beaten gondola of a stratosphere balloon on the ground. The port- hole slowly opened and out climbed the famous Zoom Zoom, whom everybody prob- E261