Elk Grove High School - Elk Yearbook (Elk Grove, CA)

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S3 Y 4,1 f I THE ELK. ADVICE TO THE LOVELORN Dear Editress: , What shall I do? Two very lovely young men are in love with me, and I don't know which one to accept. I rather favor the one with red hair, as it goes so well with my complexion, but I'm afraid if I refuse the other one, he will become despondent and commit suicide. B. M. My Dear B. M.: If you fear the consequences, why not marry both of them and move to Utah? Editress. Honorable Editress: I am always in the most awful positions because I just can't make my eyes behave. VVhat shall I do? B. T. Dear Child: We advise you to wear mule blinders. Eda. Dear Editor: What is the penalty for bigamy? I-I. W. Mr. H .W., E. G. I-I. S. Dear Sir: Plural mothers-in-law. Ye Editress. Most August Editress: My only fault is that I am too attractive to the boys. They all want to kiss me. How can I cure this? V. A. Dear Miss V. A.: Vxfe advise eating garlic three times a day. This cure has been used before and was, I am told, very effective. Ed. Dear Editress: I am in great distress. I find that at the dances I overtop all my pardners by at least five inches. How can I remedy this? Aggie. Dear Aggie: Take in a tuck in your legs. Eddie. IT REALLY HAPPENED At half-past seven every night, G's beau came tripping up so light, VVith a box of candy under his arm. VVhat cared she though it made her fat? It was nice of John to bring her that! But Johnnie failed to come one night, G, sitting in the dim twilight, Thought he was very mean. Wlieii the first of the month rolled 'round, G's pa received a bill for just ten pound Of Lowney's very best creams. Those Kute Kadets Loot Hawley-Un. tuh, tree, fur! Un. tuh, tree, fur! Un, tuh, tree, fur! Private Ehrhardt Cof awkward squadj-I'll bet he can't count any farther. Them Seniors! Richard Hawley-If I hit you, the angle your body makes with Mother Earth will be zero. Paul Voss-And if I hit you, your face will be a perfect plane! Eighty-six

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ef I HE ELK The Ruba1yat of a Woman Hater VVoman lb 1 moneter of auch wmsome 1111611 That to be xx ell hated must not be seen , For xx hen too oft fELI'1'l1l1'11' xx 1th her damty fue VVe Bret endure her then p1ty then embrace' QXV1th apolognes to Pope J Brmg On the Meat Wagon' Every one to Clarence Sehulfe mfttr reee1xf1ng ex pwperj XfVl1 ttj3. g1t? C S I got an axx ful pam' Sc1ent1F1c Facts Comp11ei by Wackman and Brugler You suspend 1 pendulum on '1 pomt 111 lT11Cl axr A CO1'l'1PI'C9S1011 pumo IS for tompressmg a1r 1nto 1 smaller x 'ttuum Heat of IUSIOII ms the meltmg l301l1t of hqu1dS Take an empty bottle full of xx 'xter The 11ttle germs lJO1l1I1g C'1l19C the IIZOZ to bubble xx hen you put o cu lo be tontrnued 3 Too True' Derr1l ftrymg to do four foot ucample of phx s1c1l torture 111 1 one meh allowance of breathmg room Wlrat does Qhe thmk we are 'mnxxvay Carol fequxlly l1'11lCl1C'1PlDCClJ qhe doeen t thmkl Then she sent us up to the foothghts SILLY SONGS Words by Musn bv W Ehrhardt 81 H Hooper Maggxe I ohse 'I he nlght was d'1rk the Qlxx xx as blue NVhen up the tr'1ek '1 hobo Hexv And from hm brent a dagger drexx And Qtwbbed the 'wH.llClXX1ClI tl'l1 ough 'md through A LOVE SONNET C1 o 'mn Unknown Reautyj For your h'1xr 15 hke a door mat Your ewre they 'lre eo queer Your hpx are l1ke '1 beer g aw But Qtlll I lox e you de'1r THE TOUCHING ANSWER CA Ixnoekoutj Your ha1r 18 hke '1 mop rag Xour feet are l1ke a Scoxxf H our ears are llke '1 cauhfioxx er But stlll I loxe the eoxx Ql3etter than youj Heard on the W1re Fxrst Volce I tl'llS Dr W 1lCl21l1gCI',S resxdencep DCTf1l9 Voice No, thm IS Dr Vxflldanger Q l1ttle glrl I' lghtv 6 Je lf- 'if '1.'r,, 'f V x 1 'lfliluxffvx ANL. loft '-'nil F , u,f'xt -Nw ' 7 I .I ' y I 1 . .I V. . C i y I I J 1 5 ' 4 C ' '. , 2 5 T . I . c , '-' c I . v 'W' I ' 1 1. C f , ' ' ' ' . 3. : A . 4. Parallel lines can meet in infinity,-if they are good ones. 5. . , Ic . 6. . of - ' - lt n a t. Crx x - . 7. - AA JS. I H A,, . 2 J . I' . ' J- . ' I if . ? c 2 c 1 c 1 in ' L y . . . . ' ' 4 l. X ' Q , Y c. c , . -7 , J c I c , .x C K 1 V, . c A .1 I ' ' c I . 1 K. 4 ' C Q , , c . 1 c . , : C l sr, . 7 7 , c . 7 . 7 I ' , 7 . . , c .I c c I , ' 5- ' v - ,1- V c . -' h . . - . ., . - . . . n , . -.

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THE ELK SENIOR SILLINESS qCC113.1'1O SIX Scenes Sophomore Susan sat 'i1lC1ltlV sequestered S1lly Sain sees Susan See Sam says Susan s1t' Sam set Some Semors See Sam Say' sald Semors, stmgy Sam shall share some sentxmental sentenees Senlors set Sam sore, Susan SIIIITS SCIIIOFS smcker Shut up, snarls Sam Sen1ors shrlek Sam savs Susan shruggnxg shoulders, some s1lly Sen1ors seem sud denlv sxmxan Src Semors seem suddenly small Sun Susan suddenly start southward t tneous spoomng squashed' Sxgnedj Somebody s S1mp Some Shower' LOUISE Qlookmg up at Ilugh How s the xx eather up there Hugh? It Q plettyf warm doxy n here Toad Sp1t 111 her eye 'Ind tell her It s I'H.1l'l1llg Love LOg1C PTOIJOSIUOII Be'1tr1ee I lox e you To prox e that x ou lox e me Cn en I loxe you Proof All the xx orld lox es '1 lox er But I 'tm a lover , all the xx orld lox es me You are all the world to me , you loxe me Q E D Query D1d joe Blush? Vel na Murphx fgettlng names of people xx ho 'ue to bflllg refreshments Oh oe, g1VC me your name' oe 1'l'11SL111ClCI'S'f'1l1d11lg' VVh'1 all 'th ah, xx hy yours IS good enough for a xxlule yet 1sn t 1t? So DoI V1s1tor 'mt Orfttornwl Contest I just loxe that httle part 111 Mr Dah leen s h'ur' QHow Do They Get That Way Pj Sxbyl Oxx en flE'l.l'l111'10 CPD to play tenmsj XVhere do you get the sets' How do you freeze on a set? Leap Year at That Eumce fon tenn1s courtj I don t beheve you know enough to take care nf yourself Joe' Joe fsternly attenxptlng to proxe lns Umpabxlxtyj I am amplv capable of takmg care of you as xx ell as myself' EIIIIICC Qaslde coylyj Oh' th1s 15 so sudden' l xghty sexe fs . Y 1 xo 1 .- , yu A 'Wi ec .. . -I . if . I - 'K , ' f' 1 fs C 3. , .' . u xr . ' ' sr ,L - A Q ' , Jr n L s C ', v . ' x C s x . 1 cc u , cc 71 . , 3 A cc, ,' ' - , ci . , . . . ' ' I! '. ' ' : C . p2 , S , , seekmg soda solace. SIX Senxors shnk slowly 's1de. Some spectacle! Spon- z ' . . C . l , . I . . ' W h Di ,S ry y . ak ' r L T , C S q ' ' : ' . , ' f . 1- V I 7 ' . 1. ' ' .T . ' 3 2. C ' 3. .' . ' ' - 5 4. ' 5. 1 . . . . . f J ' ' 1 ,i. , C - ' 51. rf . . - . -I C C , C-C -C -K I y . V . . , . , . .x Ax - . I . . J I - ,Q l Q. C C j . C u I -' ' C ' b' . L. '. - f ' 1 4 . . - ,b . r X 3 8 7 ' , ' , .S 'c c L , I I I c ' 'V c . . -. , 'Y Y 1' . .S ., I .