Edwin Vare Junior High School - Pilot Yearbook (Jackson, PA)

Page 19 text:

The natives were Habbergasted, bamboozled, and taken in. The next thing Jim knew they were all bowing down to him. Oh 'boy, thought Jim, they think Buddy $3994. Wait until they see him smoking a Cigarette. The natives looked up and saw the smoke from the Cigarette pouring out of Buddy's mouth. They made wild gestures to each other, and mumbled and talked in their native tongue. One drew a knife and the look on his face as he made a reach for Buddy y twho was sitting on Jimts lapl convinced Jim it was time to make his exit. Jim started to run. The natives followed. They were gaining on him and he was tiring. What could he do? He did the only thing that could possibly save his life, he threw them his beloved dummy, Buddy. By the time the natives had finished massacring Buddy, Jimmy was on the ship. Whatts your hurry, son? asked the captain. Jim didn,t have to answer. One look told the captain the whole story. IRENE GAYGAN, 9B2. at A SUDDEN DECISION Tommy, come up to bed this minute, it's late, said Tommyts mother furiously. Aw, gee, Mom, I gotta finish this model airplane tonight, was Tommyts reply. His mother agreed to let Tommy have another half-hour before going to bed. So absorbed. in. his work was Tommy that he didntt see the dark shadows creeping through the window until they cast a reflection over his work. Nervously he wondered where they came from and walked slowly backwards until he reached the door. A bang! A crash! and Tommy clashed like lightning up the stairs. Quickly without hesitation he got into bed. Surprised at Tommy,s hasty departure for bed his mother asked him if he was very tired. Oh, no, replied Tommy! I can finish it tomorrow. And so Tommy went to dreamland hoping that he may never experience a fright like that again. PHILOMENA PILI,:SB5.

Page 18 text:

cause the vacant Chair was occupied by what we call now a human beanpole. After waiting several more hours, the patient the doctor was working on came out. He had the astounding color of white, the suit he had on was a strange red. After limping out of the office, the doctor came out with instruments intending to show us how to prevent the gallblader from getting to the feet. He took out his tools which were a hammer, chisel, saw and crow- bar. Of course, when the patients saw this, there was a very strong wind, and everybody disappeared including me. MARIE LOMBARDI, 783. it TRICKS DON'T PA Y HE captain looked at Jimmy as he prepared to descend the gangplank. I'Iim, he called, I wouldn't take that dummy along if I were you. These African natives are very super- stitious. They might cause some trouble. nOh phooey, thought Jim, I can take care of myself, I'm not a baby. With that Jim walked away from the ship and diS appeared into the African jungleewith his dummy, Buddy, under his arm. A few minutes later Jim found a comfortable spot in a grove of palm trees and started to hold a conversation with Buddy. Almost immediately a crowd of curious natives gathered around them. ltBuddy, did you have your lunch today?U asked Jim. Sure, I had a hundred things to eat, came the reply. A hundred things to eat? Thatts impossible. uOh, is it? I had a hundred things to eat just the same. nIs that so? What were they? A big plate of baked beans. The natives watched, their mouths wide open. Do you want to hear a poem, Jim? asked Buddy. lfO. K'Jt tlSome men smile in the evening, Some men smile at dawn, But the man worth while Is the man who can smile, When his two front teeth are gone. fifie Elect 16

Page 20 text:

SHITS man I l ABBOTT AND COSTELLO VISIT VARE CHARACTERS: Abbott, Costello, a stu- dent of Vare, Miss Terry. T IME: 8:45 PLACE: Vare Junior High ABBOTT: Well, hereIs Vare School. COSTELLO: VareIs School? Who's got a school? I ain,t got a school. Why should Vare have a school? I dunno, do you, Abbott? ABBOTT: I guess not. COSTELLO: If you don't know, why did you say this is Vare;s school? ABBOTT: Say, here's a boy who might direct us. Say, boy, tell us how to get into Vare. BOY: You walk around the block five times and turn left. COSTELLO: You turn left? BOY: ThatIs right. COSTELLO: What's right? BOY: Left! COSTELLO: How can left be right? When the right is left. BOY: Sure, I said the left,s right. COSTELLO: WhatIs right? BOY: The left? COSTELLO: Here we go again! Yo, Abbott, get me out of this, will you? ABBOTT: Come on, Louie, let's get out of here and go left. COSTELLO: Right. ABBOTT: No, left. COSTELLO: Right. ABBOTT: L-e-f-t. COSTELLO: O. K. You don't have to grab me like you were going to sock me. ABBOTT: I am. COSTELLO: Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh! IThey enter the schooH Look, Abbott, I could see my face in the wall. ABBOTT: What do you mean you could see yourself in the wall? That's a marble wall. COSTELLO: Sure, aintt I cute? You know what my girlfriend said last night? But I don't believe her! I'm still cute, airft I? ABBOTT: No, what did your girl- friend say last night? COSTELLO: Well, you see it was like ewell she saide-welIeI'm too fat. But I think I,m cute. ABBOTT: She wasxft kidding. COSTELLO: What do you mean? Do you want to fight about it? ABBOTT: Why you yellow so-ancI-so. Look, here comes a teacher. COSTELLO: 011. A teach-her. WhoIs going to teach her? I'm not be- cause IIm too smart. ABBOTT: Hello, teacher. TEACHER: My dear sir, please address me as Miss Terry. COSTELLO: Did you say Miss? TEACHER: I did. ABBOTT: Now, see what you did? Come on, let's go in the room. tThey enter the room.I COSTELLO: Yo! Abbott, Abbott, look! Miss Terry the fifth again? TEACHER: Say, young man, what is your name? ABBOTT: Bud Abbott. TEACHER: Will you please be seated. ABBOTT: I am seated. TEACHER: I mean sit down. ABBOTT: I am sitting. TEACHER: Were are you sitting? ABBOTT: On Costello. TEACHER: VVhoIs this Costello per- son? Elie 9M 18