Edwin Vare Junior High School - Pilot Yearbook (Jackson, PA)

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it was his heart. uLittle boy, said he, tfwhere did you develop such a strong chest? Well, said Abner, Hl had the measles and the Chicken pox and scarlet fever and the big mumps. That's why I have a strong outgrown Chest.U No, said the doctor, It's something else. Abner thought for five whole minutes; then he managed to say, I had when I was very small e-p-e-d-e-r-m-i-s because I never washed my face. The doctor decided to give Abner a thorough examination. Off with the shirt, he said to Abner. Of course, Abner tried to find an excuse, but couldnlt think of anything to say, so he took off his shirt. The book fell out, and the doctor said, Aha, that was your strong chest. The doctor picked up the book and examined it. Where did you get this? he asked. We-elel, said Abner, I geOet itea I meanel made aeaeae mistake and instead-of-taking my own book, I took the teachers roll book. The doctor sat down and started to laugh. Then he asked Abner, Why did you hide it in your shirt? Well, said Abner, YOUesee, its like this. The teacher threatened us if she found the book, so you see, I had nothing else to do, but hide it and play sick. I'm sorry, said the doctor, we will have to give Miss Brown her book back. No! said Abner, Please donlt, I have a penny and a half left from breakfast, if you want it. Miss Brown will have to have her book back, repeated the doctor, and you will have to give it to her. Abner pleaded, but to no avail. He picked up the book and went up to Miss Brown. Miss Brown, he said, I made a mis- take and took your roll book. Pm sorry. Miss Brown gave a growl, squared her jaw, and stared at Abner. Her eyes bored. like gimletSeBLACKOUTth, poor Abner McCarthyl Poor little boy! ADELE CAPOLUPO, 9A1. 5352 .Tilat 14

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quick permanent and took me before a large mirror. Then she got twenty bottles of peroxide and dyed my hair blond. With a complete costume I was ready to ride. I was placed on the horse. The manager announced me as mljhe Great Ali Quinine, the Famous Child Rider.H It came to me I didnlt know how to ride. But what was I going; to do now? The curtain was open and there I went, shaking like a leaf. I had to learn how to ride here and now I started to stand up and do tricks. Was I surprised when everyone started to clap and Cheer. When my act was finished the manager handed me a fifty-dollar check. I asked him what happened to The Child Rider? He told me that she made him work too hard so the horse kicked her off. Just then I heard shots and screams and woke up to find myself riding the end of the hedpost. VICTORIA PERRON, 9B6. wk ABNER MCCARTH Y HIS poor soul named Abner McCarthy went to Vare Junior High School. He was short, fat, and ugly. How the teachers hated him tyou could see this on his reportl. One day when the sun was shinning brightly, poor Abner got in trouble, as usual. To his misfortune instead of taking his own notebook he took the teachers roll book. The next day Abner was late for school, so the teacher had to mark it in her roll book, but where was it. The teacher threatened but no one seemed to have the book, except Abner, who could hardly think, he was so frightened. Where could he put it? In the basket? No, that was impossible. At last a thought came to his brainless head. He would put it in his shirt. The teacher said she would search everyone. Abner was stuck. He raised his hand, and his face was as pale as a ghost. Miss Brown, he said, I have a sore throat. May I go to the doctor? Yes, was the reply. Abner was soon out of the room, note- book and all. Down to the infirmary he went as fast as his legs could carry him. The doctor examined his throat, but couldnlt see anything the matter with him, so he examined his heart. Here was where the difficulty came in. Therels where Abner had the roll book. The doctor couldnlt hear the heartbeat, and thought 13 51k 918d hED CROSSMCTm

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CRAZY CIRCUS The Benstein, Bawacka, Beckhauser and Bink Brothers Cir- cus was just unloading in a small micl-eastern metropolis on a balmy spring day in the year of 93,000 B. A. C. twhenever that wasl. Hey, Smiley, come herelll All over the joint whenever anyone wanted someone to do anything for them they called little Smiley. tBoy what a dope; there must be an easier way to make a livingJ One dark, dark evening, just about the darkest evening ever tGee this sounds like a ghost storyl, Smiley was walking along outside the managerts tent, when he heard the voice of the manager refusing to open the safe. Then a soft sweet voice of a man threatened to kill the manager if he did not. What would you do if you were in the same position as Smiley? Would you try to capture the thief single-handed? Would you run for help? Well, Smiley ran but not for help. He ran so fast and so far that no one ever again heard of little Smiley of the Benstein, Bawacka, Beelihauser and Bink Brothers Circus again. tTis rumored: Benstein, Bawacka, Beckhauser and 13in Brothers are thinking of selling the circus to the Quattle, Quimby, Quintavalle and Quirk Brothers. MATTHEW GOODBODY, 9B1. Vk DOCTORSeBAH! I was just arriving at Dr. Snozzlepussi Charming waiting room where the cushions t1 later learnedl were stuffed with wood splinters. Walking in, carefree and happy, I heard a scream from the doctors office. All my happy feelings vanished and I sank down in a cushion when, Ouchl tHa, ha, silly of me to screamj Sitting in an awkward position I watched the faces of the doctorls patients. They were all pale; to say nothing of the different sighs and groans I heard once in a while. We all sat there a few hours when a woman decided to offer her seat to an old man who was just strolling in. Another gentleman stood up and offered the lady his seat, a boy asked the man to take the seat he had, the old man who started all this rumpus offered the boy his seat. This went on several times until it was getting very boring. It finally ened up with the old man sitting in the boys lap, the lady sitting in the gentlemanls seat, and the man was sitting on the floor, be- 15 film 37w