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Page 26 text:
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SMILE YOU FRESHIE THE FRESHMAN’S PRAYER. “Now T lay me down to rest, Thinking of that Algebra test. Should I die before I wake, That test I will not have to take.” Mrs. C.—“Bernice, give eight facts concerning an adult’s teeth?” Answer—“The change of climate in the mouth very often cracks the enamel.” 4. Science Class. Subject, “Seals” A student said they lived on land as much as they lived on water. The teacher asked a bright sophomore, “On what land?” Sophomore in middle of day dream: “In corn fields, don’t they?” «§» Instructor—“What three words are most used in the Freshman Class?” “I don't know,” said the Freshie. “Correct,” said the teacher. 4» I like to be a Sophomore And with a Sophomore stand, A fountain pen behind by ear, A notebook in my hand. I would not be a Freshie, Nor do what Freshies do. I’d rather be a Sophomore And work like Sophomores too. We’ve flunked in Science and Algebra, Our marks in History we’ve missed. “We’d like to find the man,” said they, “Who said ignorance was bliss.” Steam has been defined as ice water crazy with the heat.—Boy’s Life. L - Freshman—“When does a man become four handed ?” Sophomore—“When he doubles his fist.”—Boys’ Life. 4 “FOR SALE” One perfectly good set of Ninth Grade hooks, consisting of A1 Algebra, Modern History, Science and English. They are in good condition, never been opened. All they need is a little air. EDWARD GARDNER. TO SOME OF OUR BOYS Get all your studies, Learn all you can, So when you grow up, You’ll be a wise man. 4, IN ALGEBRA CLASS. Mrs. C.: “Now, Eddie, do you have that in your head ?” Eddie: “Yes.” Mrs. C.: “Then you have it all in a nutshell.” 4. Said the teacher to a little German boy: “Willie, is the world flat or round ?” “It ain’t needer one, teacher,” sai l Willie. “But, what is it then ?” said the teacher in surprise. “Veil,” said Willie, “Mine Fader says it vos crooked.”
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Page 27 text:
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IN SHAKESPEARE’S TIME. Mrs. Cruise (explaining the theatres in Shakespeare’s time to Freshman) : “In those days everybody was a man.” (This is a real joke.) Question : What happens when one irresistible body meets another? Answer: They get married. 4 She: “He told me I was a poet. Her Friend: “Did he scan your feet ?” 4s On account of the great lonesomeness felt between Rubye and Elmer the High School is considering having school on Saturday and Sunday that they may not get “see sick” during the long period from Friday night until Monday morning. 4 Did you know this? A fracture is when you bump it. Sunshine is to color the body. Sight is a little ball in the eye. The result of the World War was: Germany departed. A prefix is a syllable attached to the head of a word. Columbus was a man that saile 1 and thought he landed on the west, but instead of that he landed in the east and discovered America. Monosyllables are words that are— we haven’t had polysyllables yet. Elmer: “How many senses are there ?” Lois: “Six.” Elmer: “What? I have only five.” Lois: “I know it. The other is common sense.” h ELMER’S IDEA OF HISTORY OUTLINE. A. Object: (1) To keep kids out of mischief. (2) To take up brain space. B. Accomplishments: (1) Sleepless nights. (2) Sore eyes. (3) Worries about finals. Lois, which really is correct: (S)m-a-c-k-s or M-a-x ? Geometry shark (Nit) ? As I sit here in my seat Waiting for the Geometry meet, When I close my eyes I see Longer points and circles square, Then I think and nearly swear. Of the pages I have turned And not a heap sight have I learned. Then I look and still I see An old worn book still far above me. When from my pipe dreams I awake And for the love of Heaven’s sake, There before my very eyes Lays the old “Scared” hook of lies. —Margaret. Mrs. Cruise in Science—“Is there any alcohol in cider?” Freshman—“Inside of who?” Sophomores’ contribution of Goat Feathers to the Trash Pile: Margaret W.—Gum. Martha M.—A copy of “A Mad Love.” Eva N.—Interest in city lots. Lois F.—Surplus energy. Elmer M.—Unfinished notebooks. Ruth G.—Bonbon boxes. Floyd G.—Lost ambition. Blanche S.—Gift of gab. Rubye O.—Geometry. Oscar G.—Wasted hours. Mable C.—Flirtations. Ruth C.—Notes.
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