Dickinson School of Law - Commentator Yearbook (Carlisle, PA)

Page 82 text:

Wait! . . . Nicholas has iust passed out, his Caddie, Torcia, is calmly attending to him. l think he will be able to continue. Joe Kleinfelter has stopped play mo- mentarily to ask Charlie Memolo, the fourth member, a question. The two of them are talking quite rapidly, but neither seems to be listening to the other. Switching back to the clubhouse, we find Mel Dildine has been located, asleep on a locker-room bench. Now teeing-off with Dildine are other late arrivals -- Tom Boettger, just back from the Villanova Classics and Tiny Tim McAuliffe, dressed in a bright yellow shirt, con- trasted by his flamboyant red ascot. Following close be- hind is another late starter, Ben Henszy, the well-known State College architect, who says he plays golf only when he can't find interesting girls to date. The foursome is rounded out by Bonnie Menaker, two-time North Carolina Open Champion, now taking a tour of the Dickinson course. Back at the eleventh, we spot Rags Hallgren in the rough, peering at the pin through a pair of binoculars. He seems to be pointing past the green to a nudist colony located iust next to Dickinson's eleventh hole. Fearless Fred Novinger, fearing that one of the golfers might be attacked by a wild-eyed spectator, has insisted that all golfers take out insurance with his company for self- protection. Fred seems to be making a MOCKery out of the entire match. One of the few golfers using a motor- ized caddie is Wild Bill Bolton. It is a beautifully adorned Buick Rollmaster but it looks like it ran out of gas right in the middle of the thirteenth fairway - the famous Curtilage dogleg. This is one of the few three- somes on the course today. Sidney Nicoll, who was to

Page 81 text:

9,63 49' At the eighth we see Bullet Bob Pennachio lying four in a dangerous water hole to the left of the green. Bullet Bob gets himself into these situations by hurrying his shots in order to post his Bill giving the Particulars of each round. With Bob are Mendy Mendelsohn who ioined the tournament late, but with experience, and who has shot amazingly well since George Joseph left the circuit. Bobby Sable, one of the tourney's most colorful competi- tors, plays the game without any golf clubs, bag or Zionitz caddie, his only equipment consists of natural ability. Sable had gone out earlier but lost his position when he took time out to acquire a new roommate. Round- ing out this foursome is Tommy Peoples, a conservative competitor with a strong, well-disciplined swing. Let's look now at the fifth, where Monster Hitchens seems to 'be leading the pack. Despite having slept through the second and fourth holes, the Monster seemed to come into his own on the fifth. This is a magnificent hole with the green resting at the Bottom of a giant Walnut. Eric Coates runs a close second on this hole as he lies three behind a small Snook-like hazard to the right of the fairway. Gentleman Jim Marsh has just shot a chevy three-iron through a fence and onto the green and now he turns to eloquently address the crowd. Too bad our microphones cannot pick him up. Wee Willie Ober is last on the fifth and has just driven his shot out of bounds through a motel window. The State Police are now helping Ober to retrieve his ball . . . forcibly!! The field is changing rapidly as on the tenth we see that Hammerin' Herb Hoffman of H-burg has iust bogied the hole. With him is Steve Nicholas, Ahepa Amateur Champion who shows great promise .

Page 83 text:

li:- 'i l llllililli Pr'- have played with this group, has announced that he is accepting a football contract with the H-burg Caps and intends to give up golf. Fred Howell, playing alone, has been disqualified. His vociferous exclamations of self-admiration including, l am the greatest , were iust too much for tournament officials. Complaints were registered against Howell by Andsom Andrews and Rock Reilly, who claimed that they were the greatest. Howell has declared that he will head straight for the nineteenth hole and register a counter-protest. At the tenth, play is being held up for the moment. lt seencs that Kleinfelter and Memolo, still talking to each other but not listening, have been joined by Pop McClain and Rick Barros. Boy, what a sight to see . . . er, hear! The argument concerns who will be allowed to speak first and last. At the eighteenth, Parker and Sensenich have fin- ished and have turned in fine scores. Beth is all smiles since she may be in the money. Two revenue boys, Ex- emptions Carr and Deductions Bomgardner are already talking to Beth advising her how to fill out forms 'IO4'l A-97652 Q 2, Title B, subsection 640, and explaining the full effect of section one UD of the Internal Revenue Code. lla has announced that she will Review some of the interesting phases of the Tournament with the better golfers at an Artillery Punch Party over which Beth will reign as Queen of the Moot. lla is sure she will be able to record some candid remarks for posterity.