Derby High School - Crimson Yearbook (Derby, CT)

Page 48 text:

Pant' Fvrt-r-Silt' THE CRIMSON Cllotss lpiropllitesy Lying on my back the other evening. I fell sound asleep and was. consequently, transported through the airy realms of dreamland. In my flight I came to the walls of a little village outside of which three men were arguing, Hpon inquiry I discovered that this town, peacefully named L'topia. was inhabited exclusively by the Class of 1930. As a result. Deeds Collins, i icial gate-keeper. refused to admit Evelyn O'Iieefe, Helen tiamble. and Florence Schlitter because they '.-:ere hitched up to the afore-mentioned gentlemen. Hailed as census-taker. I registered first at the city hall where Debsky, the mayor. was holding a com- mittee meeting to revoke the Eighteenth Amendment, In the adjoining office. Charlie Soderstrom, big shot of the 'I'ri-City Iilectric Co.. was laboriously checking and diiuble-checking his incvme tax. while Fred Sill '.-round up the eight-day clock. L'nwilling to disturb 155212 I tiptoed downstairs and to my astonishment came upon L'hiliby Chanda. who informed me that he '.'.' as odd-joh- man. performing every task from -tazinp-liclziiig to garbage collecting. ,Xppointing him- -elf as guide. he escorted me to an observation bus and iii'-re left me in the care of the announcer, Ella Tomko. I-fe 'soluliilitjr has increased twofold. By the time I T'-acli'-fl Blain Street. I knew everyliody's business in-'iv-r than the-.' knew it themselves, Ilvmen and .'1bf- Xtelili--r li:o.'e formed a monstrous corporation -v tlif: :'i.amif:u:ture of rl ap. dyes, reducing pills, lf-:nical drug-, 1-t eetera: Xl Klcffartliy is busier pan ew-r -'anpping rut forest tires and giving driving lessons on the side: and Bill Carroll-would you be- lieve it ?-is running a day nursery. He amuses the maids by dancing anything from the Charleston to the Irish breakdown. Gaetano. it seems, never forgot his football days, for he was formerly employed as end- man in a minstrel show. But one night he tackled the interlecutor and now he's back in town trying to wake up Sparky , Capece. SparkyI' has retired from ac- tive life to catch up on sleep lost during fire drills. :Xt this point 'I'onnny Van Etten stopped the bus, and I decided to alight. Tommy has apparently stepped into his father's shoes. Not far up Main Street I entered the largest edifice in Utopiaf' the Murphy Building, and to my great surprise encoun- tered George Berman, head proprietor, who confiden- tially whispered that he had changed his name for business reasons. From what I heard, Anna Zacharwitz, Alice Early. and I.illian XYallace are charter members of the Uplift Society under the able supervision of Margaret Deg- nan. At present Anna is engaged in social work in the slums and Alice, Lil, and Deggy are rehearsing for a benefit play. t Deggy is .luliet.J Howard Manco waters the salted herring at the corner fish market and plays golf in his spare time: -It-lm Boni publishes alone a scandal paper entitled l.afayette. after his home neighborhood: and Bud Sullivan, now manager, counts his quarters at the Gas Company, Under the direction of Anna Chromik, who, by

Page 47 text:

HE CRIKIS4 JN Ptljlt' 15411 III-IRIIY HIGH ILXSIQIE.-XI.I. TIQAXI, 1031!

Page 49 text:

THE CRIMSON Page Forty-Sefwz the way, was selling tags for the Salvation Army, I turned my steps toward an immense building filled with officers. .-Xcci-rding to the sign on one door Red Glennon is an expert draftsman. I don't doubt it. He always did have a lot of wind. From the next room issued a series of blood-curdling shrieks. XYhen I knocked, a nurse, no other than Alice Lique, appeared and bade me call some other time. joe Pagliaro, who has just graduated from Harvard with a medical degree, is taking cut his first appendix. Somewhat frightened I entered the nearest doorway which happened to lead into the office of Hession Contractors. Earl Skeld- ing, one of IYalter's assistants. drives a truck and bowls whenever he has nothing else to do. Mounting to the roof garden, a dreadful din came tl' my ears. Ernie Cottrell was broadcasting over sta- tion B-If-N-Ii for the Bickley Slogan Co. Upon read- ing the program, I noted that Doris Parker was sched- uled to give some intimate advice to the lovelorng Leda Polvere, who was practicing in the adjacent room, was to sing Far, liar Away, in place of Mad- ame Melka De Polka, and Hector Urvetti was about to narrate some wild-west stories for the kiddies. :Xl- freda Maciag and Angelina Dainto, who were in the studio at the time, told me that they were the instruc- tors of the Home Economics Institute. Alfreda gives recipes and Angelina. dress patterns. Next door O'Connor and XYallace own a theater where .-Xlice Munger is, as formerly, their biggest at- traction. One night, they say, the Corcoran twins sub- stituted for the Duncan sisters, who were unable to appear. Fat brought the house down with his Scarf llanceg only a few were injured. Other special fea- tures are Marge Neal's Hit and Miss Revue and :Xlice Monahan's operetta. Sing, You Sinners. Mary Donahue and Yiolet Urbauo are stage managers and ticket collectors when they aren't helping Mike Popowski usher. Mike tells us that the futuristic painting on the walls is the work of Miriam Goldberg. who did it upside down lthe painting, not Miriaml so that it would resemble modern art more closely. Since I was very fatigued, I hailed a taxi driver by my old friend. Ceil Hyde, who had a good deal of experience in that line. She seems to be pining away for someone tall and dark. Well, Ceil dripped me on at a restaurant. Yerua Strang has revised things somewhat lput a nickel in the sl' t and the soup comes to youl. Irene McCoy and Helen Madgic are chief cook and bottle washer: while Emily Stockmal saves all the white meat of the chicken for Soderstrom, who eats there. Nearby -lennie U'Connell and I.il Haaf have opened a Five and Ten Cent Store: but business is poor because they both want to work at the candy Counter. Gladys Friers and Teresa liraquinto own a gaso- line station and peanut stand combined. If the people dt nft buy gas, they buy peanuts. Overcome by curiosity, I approached a low Eng-- lish-style mansion on a hill. I was cerwemoniously ad- mitted by the butler, Bill Loftus, who was so glad to see me that he forgot his English accent. And when the ly-dy comes down, who is it but XYinnie Balm- forth. She and Harry alternate: she keeps the barber shop open and tends to his law clients, while he makes delicious salads. At the present, one of her clients is Mathilda Halper, who is suing for a divorce on the