Delaware Valley College - Cornucopia Yearbook (Doylestown, PA)

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THE GLEANER 27 idiosyncracies of an hallucina- tion that farming was a deli- cate and dainty profession, and have since learned better, through our guidance and a lit- tle help from the faculty, we leave 'this Farm School Gold Mine, a glittering heap situated in the rear of the Main Barn. Guard it carefully, watch tend- erly o'er its welfare, for remem- ber that it is the farmer's proffit, yea, his truest Liberty Bond. And you, Freshmen-No longer shall ye be as blots on the beautiful landscape, nor as derelicts on the ocean of life, for today we loosen the fetters which have held ye fast to your restricted world, for today we lift thee on the wings of lofty aspir- ations and final realizations in- to the celestial realms of Jun- iorhood. Now you may trans- fer your Freshman caps, signs ,f insigniiicance, which we on you for the mere pittance of fifty shekels, to your incoming successors, but you shall re- member to be lenient with them, for though they shall be a green crop, you have but just matured. Being conscious of the uncer- tainity of your lives, since our all-protecting care has been withdrawn from you, and com- placently recognizing our men- tal and moral superiority, we make all effort to see that you, our beneficiaries, duly receive all that we have so profusely showered upon you. In witness whereof, We, the Class of Nine- teen Hundred and Eighteen, do, hereby, on this tlwenty-fourth day of February, 1918, sign our names and affix our seal to this Testament, the final revelation of our goodwill. Sworn to before: Izzie A. Nutt, A-dam Swindler, Augusta Wind, Hugo Onn, Attorneys-at-Law. .1-.L-,1-1 J .

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26 THE CLEANER MENU QA Bill of Fare-welll Vorspice Running Orthoptera Soup Myxobacteriacelae- A mixture of Micrococcus, Streptococcus and Dyplococcus Bouillon A sample of Farm School Old Reliable Punch Actinomyces Ullhis Punch caus- lces Frozen Vibrio, served with windpuffs , To Mr. Young, whose pres- ence in an executive capacity on all momemtous occasions, such as hauling manure, and weeding onions, is marked by his pompous and majestic attire, of which the masterpiece is his fashionable Tuxedo, we be- queath a stately Prince Albert, to be edged with brass so that it may more favorably compete with the lengthy record set by its predecessor. This we lav- ishly bestow upon him for two reasons, firstly, in order that he may retain the dignity Of his grande-ur on the aforemention- ed occasions, as we have notic- ed that his present frock is fray- ed beyond all hope of repair and fear that it is gradually vanish- ing into the atmosphere, and secondly, as we propose to DFG' serve the prehistoric signi- cance of his present Tuxedo by making it the iirst contribution for the establishment of a mu- seum of Art at Lasker Hall. One guiless freshman, Syd- ney Brunwasser, who on all op- portunities gives vent 'to his deep emotions by a moist dia- bolical guffaw, disturbing the equanimity of Miss Abrams and ruffling the calm waters of Mr. Bishop's peace of mind-receiv- ing thereby the piece of his mind-we place under the tute- lage of Mr. Jack Miller, our mu- sical artist, so that his unique and indescribable extravagan- za of a laugh may be cultivated for future service to aid Messiah at the Ressurection of the Dead. To the juvenile Sammy Greenberg, who has won the un- disputed and enviable title of the champion dog-eater of Farm School, we leave that sleek and saporous canine, Pedro, who, we hope, after he has passed through Mis s Churchman's sausage-grinde, will furlnish a sumptuous repast, which for once will fill the void in his stomach and the hollow in his legs. l To you erstwhile J uniors, who four score and seventeen weeks ago brought forth in this school a newi organization conceived in hope and laboring under the

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28 THE CLEANER QZQ iQZQf3 , p Harry Schuffman Ladies and Gentlemen: Three short years have rolled their course, since first we enter- ed this institution. Three short years, indeed. But momentous not only in the history of our own lives, but in that of theen- tire world. Whilst we have here labored in active, constructive work, in the forming and acquir- ing p of agricultural attainments for future service, the European nations, A engaged in ruthless warfare have committed them- selves to plunder, slaughter and destruction. But what is more, this awful conflagration, this montsrous cataclysm, has descended upon our own country, upon our own United States, and with consum- ing hands has drawn us into a World War. Already the entire country has been turned into an armed encampment. Already the blood of our best manhood has been shed upon the battle- helds of France. Already there loom in every home and house- hold the spectres that .follow in the wake of war-the horrors of want, of cold, of hunger, of starvation. Stravation! What a word un- thinkable - what a condition unbelievable! Starvation in America, the producer of bread among the nations! But such is the case indeed: 'for that is the future of war-not fighting, but famineg not the slaying of men, but the bankruptcy of the nations, and the breaking up of their whole social organizationf The streess of the food situa- tion is painfully apparent. The appointment of .a Food Control- eer and food boards, the exist- ence of food campaigns and war gardens are but a few aspects of the problem. These are supple- mented with cries of conserve, save, economize, spare. And withal, the prices of food weigh heavily on the people. What is the solution of the problem? Assuredly the pleas for economy are of little avail, if the substance is lacking. On- ly in increased production can the situation be mitigated, if not entirely relieved. But herein lie many difliculties. Abnomal pri- ces of feeds and fertilizers, thx nxing of food prices, and th increased cost of labor and ma- terials have been extreme dis- couragement to the farmer. Moreover, the call to arms has drawn skilled men from the farms to the camps and the trenches, resulting in a threat- ening shortage of farm labor. To solve just such distressing agricultural problems has been the basic principle upon which the National Farm School was founded. To meet and avetrt just such a crises as present us. had been the vision of its found- er, nearly twenty-one years ago. iThe school, our Ailma Materw now in its approaching man- hood of existence, has grown