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Page 65 text:
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THE FORECASTERU Page Four OLD GRADS RETURN tkiontinued from Page ll the hell for luncheon sounded. Herh. after making a fortune in the heer husiness, has retired to a farm in lfast Hartford. Connec- ticut, where he i'aises chickens laying all types of eggs - hard- hoiled. fried. scrainhled. and poached. In the middle of luncheon, a roar was heard overhead, All the guests rushed to tlrant Field in time to see a hright red plane making a perfect three-point landing. Stepping out of the plane was .lim Carothers, who flew from XYest lYisky. XYyoming, to attend the reunion. lim, we learned. owns a society dude ranch in that city which is patronized hy each season's crop of dehutantes. Un returning to the dining- room, several after-dinner speeches were given in a witty manner hy the alumni. Following this, they all dispersed to pursue their own interests ahout school and to greet the other alumni who arrived during the afternoon. .lim Larothers contided that in spite of his present airplane. he was not entirely satistied and is attempting the construction of one that Hies on a vertical plane. tlttls facilitating him to send air- mail letters to the folks in his own town. Jim's major dithculty is the fact that his plane has a landing speed of six hundred miles per hour. The Star Battery. Callahan and Hardy, amuse themselves hy playing pantomime hasehall on the third floor, to the distress of the faculty. THE HUMAN MACHINE Feeling the gleam in the hum- mer's eye, this machine stutfs a lighted cigarette down his throat. THE YOU-ASKED-FOR-IT VENDING COMPANY Norm, Doc, and Rudie SCENE AT THE RACES The Madamoiselles Baxa and Ferguson participated in the Spring handicaps at Ueitchland last week in the capacity of on- lookers. though Ruth sat in con- stant admiration aml envy of the riders. Miss liaxa received pop- corn in one pocket from admiring gentlemen, while slipping forhid- den sugar to the equines from another pocket. Hn the way home they were caught in the press of exiting humanity and hecanie de- pressed tor more than usuall. .Xlthough she wished to keep it quiet, we have disclosed the fact that ,lane olackson, up until the time she attempted lemon culti- vation, was known as Madame Meek of the Meek Salon and sponsorer of Meek products Grow meek along with me, the hest is yet to he. Her specialty was egg facials and while work- ing in close conjunction with that small-scale poultryman, Yalen- tine, she made them less of a yolk and more of a success for the pL1liliC. SITUATIONS WANTED Any gum company who wants a good executive, call IHC. Bill Russell. Have plenty of Pull and want to get t'Stuck with a good company. Any foreign country desiring a good plane pilot, get in touch with me quick. I'm a fast worker and easy to get riled up. Address - George E. Gregson, Suite 9-1628, Sing-Sing. Would like a position in a Swiss cheese factory, making air spaces. Good recommendations. Cheap wages. Dot Brown, Box 8770, Malha. Missouri. If you're a circus and want a good harker, you've got the right man. Can sell a crowd anything from a wooden Indian to a Du- senherg. Address: .lack Sheehan, Lf S. A. HOBBY LOBBY The sixty-year-old grandfather of llean. working for The l.in- coln llome lndnstriesi' and real- izing the need for fresh ideas. sent a circular In the far-flung class of '-ll tllean. of coursel. prying into their private pas- times. Tahulated results showed as tollousi XYalter tlluckyl tiritlin amuses himself and his eight children hy instruction in the forty-twiI-year- old game of lack Straws. janet, while studying the hahits of the earthworm, practices them in her spare time, has a time capsule all her own in which she recreates. lloc NX'nlfeck. under his ca- pacity as street cleaner and still aspiring to psychology. psycho- illlillyses all drunks that hlock his progress, lilvrty-year-olrl New York dehutantes are one of XYulfeck's consistent prohlems. Aliss blewett, in her spare time thaxing mysteriously disappeared in Professor Manter's actl is editing a hook. How to Lirash Back lnto Society. DOUGH BOYS lland in hand with their other activities on the stage and in the world at large, Rohert Kramer and Douglas Marshall have in- vested in a llalf Baked Bakery Shop in Squinto where Bob en- deavors to reproduce The Bread That Mother L'sed to Make, while lloug turns out crust for the general puhlic. Ruth .Xshley is experimenting with freaks and mutations to de- velop an extra hand so that she may more adequately handle her joh. lt was discovered that propri- etress Russo is knitting a spa- ghetti sweater for her head waiter.
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