Daniel McIntyre Collegiate Institute - Breezes Yearbook (Winnipeg, Manitoba Canada)

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24 D. M. C. I. BREEZES Caller: “I would like to see the judge, please.” Secretary: “I’m sorry, but he is at dinner.’’ Caller: “But, my man, my call is urgent.” Secretary: “It can’t he helped, His Honour is at steak.” Host: “What do you think of these cigars; I got them from an aviator?” Guest: “What does he use them for—sky-writing?” Pupil: “Our literature teacher has given me a ticket for a lecture and I don’t quite know ! what he means by it.” Another Slave: “Why, what’s t’he trouble?” Pupil: “The lecture is on ‘Fools’ and the ticket says ‘Admit One.’ ” m Mr. Ford plans to operate an aeroplane Pullman. It wdll be a serious matter then if the porter brushes you off. Overheard at the Senior Dance: She: “What a remarkably small appetite you have, Jack.” He (very anxious to say something compliment¬ ary) : “Why to sit near you, Margaret, would make anybody lost his appetite.” The Hero (in broken, anguish-stricken tones): “Will you miss me?” Voice from the “Gods”: “No, not unless you dodge pretty quick,” meal”

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D. M. C. I. BREEZES 23 ‘I am sure you are all wrong,” insisted Sadie, “for I consider that Eve 814 Adam and Adam 8 12 4 Eve, so we get a total of 8,938.” “But look here,” broke in Mabel, “if Eve 814 Adam, and Adam 812 4 2 oblige Eve, surely the total must have been 82,056. At this point Mr. Duncan suggested that they might let the matter rest and get back to their algebra. ROOM 61 THE “ Boosters” have not, as yet, held any social events. But we have elected our class officers. The victims are as follows: Presi¬ dent, Margaret Bletc ' her; Vice-President, Kathleen Turner; Secretary, Jean Robinson; Sports Captain, Dorothy Hilton; Librarian, Shirley Roberts, who is also a member of the Junior Council; Class Monitor, Janet Watt; “Breezes” Representative, Mary Bletcher. The captains of the four baseball, volley ball teams are: Florence Pepper, Mildred Armstrong, Hilda Decter, Dorothy Hilton. Some prominent members are: Strong-armed Mildred, Peppery Florence, Page Doris, Butter Lily, Boal Margaret, the “outstanding” Elsie Deeks, and Kathleen Cameron, the last of that great clan. ONE NIGHT J HAD been travelling all day and now, this evening, I was sitting on the tiny verandah of the rickety hotel, enjoying a much-needed rest. It was a typical tropic night. The stars hung so close in the deep velvety sky that one could imagine they were near enough to be plucked from their setting. The air was heavy with the scent of some tropical flower, unknown to me, and which I could not see. Presently a young fellow sauntered up. He was about my age, I thought, and not very good-looking—again like me. I was surprised but not annoyed when he took the chair beside mine and began to speak. “By the way,” he said, “may I look at that pin you are wearing?” My hand strayed to the lapel of my coat. “Oh, it’s only an old school pin,” I laughed. “What school did you go to?” he inquired. “You probably wouldn’t know it, but it was the ‘Daniel Mac,’ as we affectionately called it.” “Why, I went there,” said my new acquaintance. Then followed a bliss¬ ful hour of “Say, were you there when so-and-so did such-and-such a thing,” or “do you remember old so-and-so, great scout wasn’t he?” And more of that sort of thing. At last when we had exhausted our memories, he asked my name. When I replied he gave me a look of admiration. “Gosh,” he exclaimed, “think of the old school producing a great writer like you!” “Not very great,” I modestly answered. This is my greatest dream. Do you think it will ever come true? If it does, this will be my “nom de plume”— —A. J. Oker.

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D. M. C. I. BREEZES 25 Teacher (in good humor) : “As I gaze about me this morning, I see before me a great many bright and shining faces.” Immediately forty compacts made their appearance. A rich but eccentric man died. The clergyman who was young and new to the parish, thought it a fitting opportunity to call and comfort the widow. “You must not grieve,” he told her. “The body that lies there is not your husband. It is merely a husk, an empty shell, the nut has gone to heaven.” Joe College: “Now I wonder where I left my hat.” M.L.-R12 Motor Cop to Mr. Riter: “So you saw the accident, sir? What was the number of the car that knocked this man down?” Mr. Riter: “I’m afraid I’ve forgotten it, but I remember noticing that if it were multiplied by fifty, the cube root of the product would be equal to the sum of its digits reversed.” ■ Old gentleman (lost in fog and hearing footsteps) : “Can you tell me where I’m going?” Weary voice (from darkness): “Into the river; I just came out.” Nervous passenger in aerial taxi about 5,000 feet up: “ Wh-a-at are you laughing at driver?” Driver: “I’m laughing at the superintendent. About this time he will be looking all over the lunatic asylum for me.” • • Millionaire ( speaking to a body of students about his great finan¬ cial triumph): “All my success I owe to pluck.” Student: “Yes, but how are we to know the right people to pluck?” First Jew: “Machinery does everything nowadays.” Second Jew: “I don’t know about that, talking is still done by hand.” s First Pupil: “What do you thing of Son and So?” Second Pupil: “I don’t like him. He’s one of those fellows that pat you on the back before your face, and hit you in the eye behind your back.”