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Page 20 text:
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'E TRAIL 9 6 Mrs. Sue Mary Smith McClelland Assistant in Department of Science, Daniel Baker College, ’94- ’96; Professor of English and His- tory Daniel Baker College, ’96- ’06; Professor of History, Daniel Ba- ker College, ’06-’10; Emeritus Pro- fessor of History, Daniel Baker College, ’10-
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Page 21 text:
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THE TRAIL OT fc 9 6 'S' THE HISTORY OF THE FACULTY An old man with a great burden cn his back was toiling up the moun- tain side with tremulous step. My sympathy was aroused and 1 asked him why he carried such a burden. He then began to speak and told me the fol- lowing: “l am Plutarch’s oldest servant. He has just had a Spring cleaning and has sent me to the front with this collection of the “Lives of Great Persons.” The German soldiers pay him well for true material to use as ammunition”. I was very much surprised at his next remark for he said they were the lives of the Faculty of Daniel Baker College. While the old man rested I read the following sketches: Marion Dargan Once upon a midnight dreary while Atlas was wearily supporting the globe, he was almost overcome by a sudden added weight to his burden. He sent a wireless to Neptune and was informed that a human being had just fallen from Mars into the vicinity of New “ Yawk”; and that he had sprung full grown from the pages of a “Munro’s Source Book” just before his fall. Mr. Atlas’ fear subsided and he settled down again to his job. Thus we leave Mr. Atlas in peace and follow the brilliant career of this extraordinary being. It is said that he discovered many historical facts and had two thous- and stenographers under his dictation at one time. He once spent the Summer in the Adirondacks and there he communed with the twelve gods and god- desses. They told him of the Garden of Eden and the city of Utopia, situated near the geographical center of the Lone Star State. They told of a college composed of fair maidens and gallant youths that was perishing away in ignorance for the want of an historical instructor such as he. Being very tender hearted he wept copious tears that almost ruined his complexion, mount- ed his steed Pergasus and went thither as a pedagogue. T. H. Hart He was born at some point on the Plane of Geometry. History does not record much of his early life, but he seems to have been a “Nimrod” at an early age. Once while out hunting with Teddy Roosevelt, he slew a strange wild animal called an algebra and brought it home for his mother to make a (Pi) of. As soon as he learned that the earth was flat and was supported by Atlas, he began walking around on his tip-toes to diminish the weight of Atlas’ load. Poor man ! Now he has a burden far heavier to bear than Atlas, namely the Presidency of the Athletic Council. So incumbered is he that he is not able to rise from his chair to call the Council together.
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