Dakota High School - Talebearer Yearbook (Dakota, IL)

Page 32 text:

Jokes This is dedicated to l'hilip. Philip who? Philip space. vt ik Miss Nlfarren: Now then we're all ready, run up the curtain. Don: VVhat you talkin' about--run up the curtain-think I'm a bloomin' squirrel? af 1: Don: Does your algebra teacher mark close? Russell: Does he? He takes off five if you get a decimal point placed upside down. . wr wk Miss VVarren tto Seniors who have not handed in their note- booksl: ls it true that you leave your work when the bell rings even if you are in the middle of a word? XVoodrow tanswering for the whole classl: Certainly not. If we know it's as near as that for the bell to ring, we never begin a word at all. 4: af Teacher: NVhen is the Cash account credited? Student: 'l'he Cash account should be credited when cash is departed with. ar 4: Teacher: t'NVhat is dairying? . . Pupil: Dairying is the milking of cows and putting them in bottles and cans to be sold to the people. -if if A school teacher had found one boy backward in writing coin- positions. At last she had a brain wave. She would have him write an account of a football game. lt seemed that she was succesful, for the paper was handed in promptly. lt read: Rain-no game. Dx at The teacher was giving a lesson to his class of young hopefuls. his subject being the circulation of the blood. Now suppose, said he, I stand on my head-the blood will all flow to my head, won't it? Yes VVell, how is it when l'n1 standing on my feet the blood doesn't all rush in to them? Promising Youth: Cause your feet isn't empty, sir. PF ak Lyle: How long could a person live without brains? Lewis: I don't know. How long have you been living? fbrotherly lovel. rr bk Stitzel: What is steam? Alberta: VVater gone crazv with the heat. as -of Truant Officer: Why haven't you sent your son Johnny to school. Don't you want him to learn to read? Proud Father: lt hain't necessary now that we have the talk- ing movies. in at Father: VVhere were you with the car last night? Ezra: Oh, just riding around with sonte of the boys. Father: VVell, you had better return this vanity case one of the boys left in the car. vt if Geometry Teacher: Tommy, what is a pol-y-gon? Tommy fafter some hesitationjz A dead parrot. Hr br From Geometry Class, l930: A circle is a curved line whose ends join. A circle is a curved straight line and it has a given point from which it is drawn. A circle is a large round ring having 360 degrees. Page fwvrlfy-figlzf

Page 31 text:

Calendar JANUARY 5-Santa Claus must have taken l'auline's curly locks for some doll next Christmas. 9-First basketball conference game. l-l-Ralph says big shoes keep one-'s feet warm. Does that acount for some of the big shoes around here? 2l-lfxam and cram sound alike. They travel together. too. 26-.Ngain Harry is forced to swallow another stick. FEBRUARY Salfarni lnstitute here. Ugtlh. if we could see Miss XYarren now. lt is re- ported that she has chicken pox. l3fSeniors don ribbons and overalls. lo-Nellie believes in getting there and getting there fast even if she has to slide half way across the floor. 23--Began literary work. 2-l-.-X beautiful spring day. 27 and 28-County basketball tournament. MARCH 2iNoon hour lengthened. 5-Room 5 turns into a bird cage. 6-Mr. Stitzel catches a mouse in the laboratory, much to the delight of the masculine half of tl1e class. l3--Lost, strayed or stolen. Suspenders are found in Room 5. ll-School party. 20--Elimination contest. 2-l-Senior girls proved themselves quite competent in dissembling and assembling motors. You didn't think we could do it, did you boys? 27-lnter-Society Contest. Blizzard with snow drifts ten feet deep. Thirty-six stay at Frank Meinerts. APRIL 9-Only good excuse for a sleepy class. Physics ex- periment with ether. l7-lmagine this. lt was reported that Mr. Stitzel went to a picture show alone. 22-Again I-larry is forced to swallow another stick. MAY 8-Senior fleet day. Ralph swipes his dinner by the pocket method. Sl-Baccalaureate. JUNE l and 2-lfxams. 3-Class Night. 4-junior-Senior banquet. 5-Commencement. 6-Alumni banquet. Page lvwrzly-.rvvcll ' S

Page 33 text:

Jokes Mt. Stitzel: How do you find the square root of a number? Ruby Lamb: NVhy you just take the number and put a square around the root of it. Pk 4: Freshman: I want to get ahead. Sophomore: I think you need one. :if we Miss Glenn: Name some articles made from ivory. Ruth K.: Ivory soap. x nk Miss Conway: Now this book has a very good plot, it has a very dehnite beginning and ending and obstructions come into it to help make it good. Student: Would a river be a good plot? It has a rather definite beginning and ending and there are quite a few obstructions. ik 4: Miss Conway: L'If the author is talking about Chinamen would you expect the setting to be in Chicago, or New York, or elsewhere? Leo M.: Not unless it was in a laundry. 4: 4: Here's a story about a Scotchman that's different. A conductor on a London street car noticed an elderly Scotch! man and a young Scottish lad. The old man was holding a watch in his hand and was studying it with intense interest. Suddenly he seemed satisfied and looked up. Seeing the con- ductor, he beckoned to him. VVhat is it? asked the conductor. I want to pay the rest of my grandson's fare, replied the Highlander. I-le has just become twelve years old. The conductor has since recovered. if 4: A Scottish farmer, being elected to the school hoard, visited the village school and tested the intelligence of the class by the question: Now, boys, can any of you tell me what naething is? After a moment's silence a small boy in the back seat rose. It's what ye gi'd me the other day for holding yer horse. x ir A Scotchman walked into a telegraph office and picking up a blank asked the clerk, How much will a message to Chicago cost? Twenty-five cents, replied the clerk, 'Afor the first ten words and hve cents for each additional word, and no charge for the signa- ture. All right, said the canny Scot, send my signature. I'd be glad to. XVhat is it? After a moment's hesitation, the Scot answered, VVell, I may not look it, but Iilll an Indian and my name is 'I Vl'on't Be llome Till Fridayf 4: ir Johnnie: Pa, won't you please buy me a microbe to help me with 1ny arithmetic? Papa: VVhat good will a microbe do you? Johnny: I just read in this paper that they multiply rapidly. an It A chip on the shoulder indicates wood higher up. lk Dk Miss XVarren: VVhat do you consider the greatest achievement of the Romans? Lester: Speaking Latin. sr ff Blacksmith: Now, Pat, I'm going to bring this horseshoe out of. the fire and lay it on the anvil. VVhen I nod my head, hit it hard with a hammer. Pat did. if ix No wonder the Profs. have to study so hard. The questions asked us in nnd-semesters are the type that can't be thought up in such a short time as four weeks. in in I ask you, Did we Phillip Space? Paijr' twenty-lzillr' I M A at 3 1 rigged tit.,