Cumnock School - Chronicle Yearbook (Los Angeles, CA)

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IUST CALL ME lESSIE AN INTERVIEW WITH IORIA CLENKINS I stepped into the palacial mansion of the famous star of stage and screen, loria Glenkins, and nearly fell over a butler as I did so. I was tingling with excitement! At last I was to meet this exotic personality face to face-to learn from her the secrets that ma-ke her what she is today. I waded knee deep through the thick Persian carpets, treking my way gamely to the heart of her study. Or at least she called it that. How do you do, said a vibrant voice behind me, and I whirled to see her there, clad in a shimmering negligee-the great Glenkins herself. Tell me, I said, breathlessly, what makes you so exotic? an Sit down, she purred, gesturing me into a plush divan. I sitted. It is a long story. just call me lessie. It's so comfy. Ah, domestic? I queried. Yesssss! she hissed, tripping over her long tresses. Then tell me, Miss Glenkinsf' I whispered hoarsely, tell me-what do your friends call you? You, murmured Miss Glenkins demurely, you may call me lessieI I am transmognified! I shouted. This was almost too much for me. That this gorgeous creature, the divine Clenkins, should let me call her by that pet name was almost too much. I was ecstatic. I was nuts. Tell me . . . lessiel I tried, half afraid, tell me-do you endorse toothpaste or beauty cream? You sweet boy, she purred, of course not. When you indorse tooth- paste you get samples, so l'm working for Packard. I stumbled blindly out of the house, my interview clutched gamely in my trembling hands. So this was the great Glenkins-the Bernhardt of Idaho! l3l

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WHAT OUR READERS SAY: Dear Mr. Hensel: I feel it incumbent upon me to call attention to the utter absurdity of your feature stories. It is quite obvious that they are untrue. L. H. Woody. Better Go Back to Byron, Mrs. W., Shucks, We Believe in Our Characters arid So Do Bob Elder and Clarence. o-O-o Editor: A I read one of your advertisements and sent for a steel engraving of George Washington for one dollar, and all I got was a stampf Your mag- azine is crooked. Marjorie Kennedy. Now, Marge, Dorft Be Too Hard On Us. Editors Must Live. o-O-o Dear Mr. Hensel: I think Quiddleton McDiIlpuddIer's stories are keen. My sister and I buy them all. Please have more stories like Purple Passion. Karen Okey. Sorry, Karen, 'Theres No More Purple Passion Left4jim Weaver Got the Last of It. o-O-o Dear Editor: I sent for Mr. Babcock's Mussel Course. Now send the mussels, please. Vince. 7 7 7 7 7 7 7 7 7 o-O-o Dear Mr. Hensel: Will you please tell me why ducks are so numerous? Peg. Because There Are So Many of Them, Margaret. o-O-o Dear Mr. Hensel: I sent for the wart remover you advertised last issue. I put a whole bottle on the wart on the back of my neck. The wart is gone. So is the back of my neck. Bob Fisher. I3O

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THEY L FED WHEN I SAT DOWN AT MY MARIMBA BUT . . . WHEN I STARTED TO PLAY DID THEY HOWL! Awaken your inner self! Arouse your dormant personality. Use the slumbering forces of your inner mind. Learn to command your vital mental capacities. we CAN TEACH You 'ro PLAY 'ri-ie MARIMBA WITH POISONALITY BY MAIL AWAY WITH FALSE MODESTY SOME WILL BE AMAZED BY THE AWFUL FRANKNESS, BUT YOU SHOULD KNOW THE FACTS OF MUSIC BY THIS AMAZING METHOD OF SELF INSTRUCTION. HERE'S THAT DARINC- BOOK Irvine, Hall, and Connors Larga Vista, California Gentlemen: Without cost, send me your terrific book on POISONALITY AP PLIED, for which I won't pay the postman a cent. Name .......................... Address . . . 2