Crooksville High School - Crux Hi Skan Yearbook (Crooksville, OH)

Page 19 text:

LAST WILL AND TESTAMENT OF THE CLASS OF 1957 We, the graduating class of 1957, being of sound mind(?) and so forth, do ordain and declare this to be our last will and testament, to become effective on the twenty-ninth day of the month of May, of the year nineteen hundred and fifty-seven. I, JANET ADKINS, leave my A’s in typing to Linda King (although she really doesn’t need any). I, STEVE AICHELE, leave my popularity to Mike Moore. A worthy successor. I, SARA ALDERMAN, leave my cheerfulness to Sandy Shubert. I, PHYLLIS ASHLEY, leave my heart to Dick. I, ED BARRINGER, leave my flat top to Ben Neff. I, PHYLLIS BLACK, leave my red hair to Karen Bates. No Comment! I, BUTCH BOOKMAN, leave all the girls weeping. I, ALBERTA BROWN, leave my brains to any one who can find them. I, JOE CLEMENTS, leave my motorcycle jacket to Sam Houk. I, LINDA DALRYMPLE, leave to the girls of C. H. S., Roy Hammer. You luck things! I, JEANINE EVELAND, leave Mr. Smith to the journalism class of 1958. I, RICHARD FLUHARTY, leave my quietness to Rick Murphy. I, FRED FORD, leave my wedding band to Kay Cook. I, LARRY FRASH, leave my curly hair to Don Harper. I, DIXIE HAMILTON, leave my giggles and good times to Judy Wilson. As if she didn’t have enough of her own. I, HELEN IMLAY, leave my quiet grace to Jo Anne King. I, BERNIE LINCICOME. leave my editor's seat to Jay Watts. Good luck next year, Jay! I, MARTIE McLAUGHLIN, have already left. I, JOAN MARTIN, leave my ability in English to Shirley Anderson. I, JOE RIGGS, leave my singing voice to Ray Riley. I, JENNY RUSSELL, leave my laugh to Mary Moore. I, JACK SPEARS, leave Joan. Dam it! I, KAREN TACKETT, leave my Suthin' accent to Mr. Jones. I, MARLIN TRUSSELL, leave at last. I, ARLENE WELCH, leave my height to Doug Martin. I, NANCY WILLIAMS, leave my blonde hair to Suzie Watts. I, MELANIE WISEMAN, leave my pleasant nature to everyone. I, CARL WHITE, leave my size 14 shoes to Steve Stought. He needs ’em! I, DARLA WOLFE, leave my cheerleader’s suit to Lois. I, JOHN WOOD, leave .... after 12 years, it’s about time. I, LINDA YOUNG, leave my levi's to Carol Whitehouse. I, JOE ZINN, leave.... Hurray! Hurray! Executrix Bemie Lincicome Witnesses Lil’ Abner Bridie Murphy

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SENIOR SHOWOFFS MOST POPULAR Steve and Alberta PRETTIEST HAIR Karen and Bemie BEST PERSONALITY Butch and Jeanine PRETTIEST EYES Joe and Janet QUIETEST MOST TALKATIVE Helen and Joe Fred and Dixie TALLEST AND SHORTEST Melanie, Jack, Marlin, Arlene PRETTIEST TEETH Ed and Darla BIGGEST AND SMALLEST FEET Phyllis and Carl

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SUDDENLY IT'S 1980 The following scene takes place on Mars in 1980. Spaceman Ckzckxyz has just returned from Earth and is reporting to the Martain Emperor. Ckzckxyz - Spaceman Ckzckxyz reporting. Sir. I have just returned from a routine check on Earth. As usual I have brough back a newspaper telling of the latest happenings there. This time I brought back a copy of the Crooksvilie-Roseville Messenger. Emperor - Fine, Ckzckxyz. Who is the editor of the Messenger now? And what about the circulation? Ckzckxyz - Alberta Brown, the famous journalist, is the owner, publisher, distributor, and editor of the paper. Sir. Alberta's fine newspaper work has increased the Messenger's circulation until it passed that of the NEW YORK TIMES. One of the most popular columns in the Messenger is an Advice to the Lovelorn column by Martie McLaughlin. She has so many fans she never would get all her mail answered without her private secretary Janet Adkins. Emperor - Ah, yes, I recall now. Janet typed 200 words per minute in a national contest. But who else is on the Messenger staff. Ckzckxyz - Bernie Lincicome’s syndicated comic strip is the most read cartoon since A1 Capp drew Lil’ Abner. It tells the misadventures of three mischievous adolescent boys who get into all sorts of scraps. It is titled Babylon Idiots and stars three boys named Eddie, Bernie, and Butchie. Emperor - Very well. Thank you for the information, Ckzckxyz. Now give me the paper to read. Here's a column called With the Boy’s . Listen to this. Commander of the Eighteenth Fleet, Carl White, is announcing his retirement from the U. S. Navy. Carl, a 22 year man, began his service in the Naval Reserve. I read that Joe Riggs became President of the United States, He gained public recognition when as a Representative, he proposed a bill giving all teenagers a minimum allowance of $1. 50 a week. As soon as these teenagers grew up they elected him president. Ckzckxyz - What’s this article about a new manager? Is it about politics? Emperor - No, indeed. It is the story of a young girl who follows in her brother’s footsteps. After many years, Helen Imlay was chosen rtianager of the Crooksville Municipal Swimming Pool. Ckzckxyz - Here’s an interesting article, Emperor. It says: Darla Wolfe has just opened a restaurant on Main Street. She is giving away a bowl of chili to everyone who comes in on opening day. Emperor - How about this one? State Patrolman Ed Barringer was given a promotion for contributing a new line to use on speeding drivers. Whenever Barringer pulls somebody over to the side of the road, he says, 'Pardon me, buddy, but is there any possible way you could tell me where the fire is?’. Here’s another interesting article. Miss Darlene Ford, the pretty daughter of Mr. and Mrs. Fred Ford, won the title ’’Miss Fireman’s Festival of 1980. The girl’s parents own and operate one of the most prosperous dry goods stores in Southeastern Ohio. Ckzckxyz - I didn’t know Earthlings in the U. S. A. had royalty. This article says: New Hobo King Announced. In an election recently, the H. of A. (Hoboes of America) chose a new king. The new Hobo Chief is Jack Spears who has been working at his loafing profession ever since his graduation from high school.