Covington High School - Lest We Forget Yearbook (Covington, KY)

Page 75 text:

WIT DISPENSARY. PREPARATIONS oF LEADING PHARMACISTS. A little nonsense, now and then, Is relished by the best of men. ' as Pk X The world is old, yet likes to laugh. New jokes are hard to find. A whole new editorial staff Can't tickle every mind. So if you find some ancient joke Decked out in modern guise, Don't frown and call the thing a fake- Iust laughg don't be too wise. Pk ik Dk Teacher-VVho can use the word judicious in a sentence? Pupil-VVe had roast goose for dinner and other Jew dishes. as as as Teacher-XVhat is the plural of n1an ? Bright Pupil- Men. Teacher--VVhat is the plural of child ? Bright Pupil- Twins, vs if asf V A stranger addressed the farmerls boy across the fence: Young man. your corn looks kind 0' yellow. 'KYes, that's the kind we planted, replied the boy. Don't look as if you would get more than half a crop. VVe don't expect tog the landlord gets the other half. Then after a short time the man said: Roy, there isn't much difference between you and a fool. No, replied the boy, only the fence. C753

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THE I. 2. 3. 4. 5. 6. 7. 8. 9. Io. I 1. INFIRMARY. RECORD or DRS. KILLEMOFF AND SOAKEM Fon THE YEAR 1908-09, IN C. H. S. PRIVATE HOSPITAL. Broken jaws - can't be set - caused by using big words - joe Heizer. Magnum Caput-heads must be set in rims-William Austin, .Tustin Huber, Katherine Regan, Mary Mills. Hopelessly insane-removed to the safe ward-Leslie Applegate, Joe Furnish, Si Wettig. Magnum Corpus-can probably be cured by strict diet of water and toothpicks-Irma Bussey, Helen Gainey. Katherine Cherrington, Bernard Cohen, Chester Werner, Dotie Macklin. Toomanycigarettos-can be cured gradually- William Drexelius, John Curry, William Simrall. Toomanyhubigpieatus - incurable - Mr. Dalrymple. Smiletus - doctors gave up the case - Mr. Cox. Enlargement of brain-brought on by too much study -- Helen Stacey, Abe Behrman, Sara Gofton, Edith Cobb, Carrollton Wells. Stutterstammer-cured by inserting tongue between two toothpicks - Elmer Ware. Strawberry rash - cured by talcum powder - caused by too much rouge-Bryce Dettor, Vertner Deupree. Lost voice - Mr. Warman - Too much singing. C745

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A first-grade boy brought home a perfect spelling paper each day for several weeks and then suddenly began to miss five or six words out of ten. How's this, my son P asked the father. Teachers fault, replied the boy. How teacher's fault P H Why, she moved the little boy that sat next to mc. Ik Dk Pk The rose is red and the violet's blue, And so is the man whose rent is due. bk Pk is He-You look sweet enough to eat. She Qcoldlyj-So I do, three times a day. if sf is Say, grandpa, make a noise like a frog, coaxed little Tommy. What for, my son ? Why, papa says that when you croak we'll get S5,ooo. Pk Pls Pls Little Oliver, six years old, had learned the song in which is oft repeated the refrain, Glory, glory, hallelujahj' and for some time he had been singing it with great enthusiasm and vigor. Finally he became silent, and after a brief period of cogitation he said: Mama, what does 'hallelujah' mean P As simply as she could his mother explained that it was a religious exclamation meaning praise the Lord. He seemed rather puzzled and surprised at this information, but his next question offered ample explanation of why he had thrown so much vigor in his singing. If that's what it means,', he said, why do they throw corn and have jack lanterns on hallelujah night P DK Dk 7k Look to the postage stamp for inspirationg its greatest rec- ommendation is its ability to stick to a thing till it gets there. Pk Plf ik Teacher-Mr. Browning, can you tell me anything about Burns? Pupil-VVell, they're very painful. C763