Coplay High School - Coplayite Yearbook (Coplay, PA)

Page 30 text:

Ills INFERENCE C. G., '26 — “So you imagine you know as muc-h as Prof. Wink, do you ? IIow is that ? (i. M. G., ’26 — “Well, ho himself has said that it was quite impossible to teach me anythin .’’ DIDN’T HAVE MUCH Teacher — “I came into this town, sir, as a very small boy, without a shoe to my feet or a penny in my pocket, and now look at me.” Boy — “But I always thought, you were born in this place?” Teacher — “And so I was. Doesn’t that prove my statement?” A. 7’., ’26 — “Gosh, but I’m thirsty.” (■ ('■ 26 — Just a minute and I’ll get you some water.” A. T., ’26 — “I said thirsty, not dirty.” “The sun rose high and bright On that beautiful summer night.” —Couplet, by R.. . IV., ’26. Customer — “Can I try on that dress in the window.” Salesman — “No, ma’am. We have dressing rooms for that purpose in the rear.” Agent — “Don’t you want your office furnishings insured against theft?” Manager — “Yes; all except the clock. Everybody watches that.”

Page 29 text:

HUMOR Where can a man buy a cap for his knee? Or a key to the lock of his hair? Can his eyes he called an academy, Because of the pupils there? In the crown of his head — what gems are found? Who travels the bridge of his nose? Can he use, while shingling the roof of his house The nails on the end of his toes? Can the crook of his elbow be sent to jail ? If so, what did he do? IIow does he sharpen his shoulder blades? I 'll be hanged if I know, do you ? Can lie sit in the shade of the palm of his hand? Or beat the drum of his ear? Does the calf of his leg eat the corn of his toe? If so, why not grow corn on his ear? Do ships have eyes when they go to sea? Are there springs in the ocean’s bed? Does the jolly tar flow from a tree? Does a river lose its head? Are fishes crazy when they go insane? Can an old hen sing her lay? Can you bring relief to a window pane? Or mend the break of day? What sort of a vegetable is a policeman’s beat? Is a newspaper white when it's read? Is a baker broke when lie’s making dough ? Is an undertaker’s business dead? Would a wall-paper store make a good hotel? Because of the boarders there? Would you paint a rabbit on a bald man’s head, Just to give him a hit of hare? Would you pay a policeman with silver coins? For nickel’s aren’t made for coppers, If a grass widow married a grass widower— Would their children be grasshoppers? If you ate a square meal, would the corners hurt? Can you dig with the ace of spades? Would you throw a rope to a drowning lemon? Just to give a lemonade?

Page 31 text:

HOW GREAT MEN BEGAN Harding began as a country printer; Coolidge was a farmer’s boy; Hughes, a preacher’s son; Weeks, a farmer's son; Daugherty, a store clerk; Work, a farmer’s boy; Fall, a cowpuncher and miner; Wallace, a farmer’s hoy; Hoover, the son of a butcher; Davis, an iron puddler. That’s the executive end of the government. A CHILD OF BOSTON The little boy sat disconsolately on the curb and sobbed as though his heart was breaking. The kind old lady stopped and asked sweetly: “Is a itta boy cwyin’? Turn tella nice wady wassa matter.” “If you are inquiring as to the cause of my eachrymose condition,” he answered, looking up at her pittyinglv, “it is because I have been unable to find any suitable intelligent playmate whose eugenic constitutions are in harmony with my pathological tendencies and whose hereditary affiliations meet with the approval of my paternal relations since we moved to this place from Boston.” 8. E. A., ’26 — “Mother, 1 can’t go to school today.” Mother — “Why?” 8. E. A., ’26— “I don’t feel well.” Mother — “Where don’t you feel well?” S. E. A., ’26 — “In school.” R.J. W., '26 — “Glory, there an awful lot of girls stuck on me.” M. li., ’26 — “Yeah. They must be an awful lot.” “I am innocent, your honor. Heaven is my witness.” “I am sorry,” returned the judge, “but your witness is beyond the jurisdiction of the court. Five years.” 'The school teacher was explaining what to do in case of fire. The ■ pupils listened with respectful attention until he came to his final instruction. “Above all things,” he said, “if your clothing catches fire remain cool.”