Conneaut High School - Tattler Yearbook (Conneaut, OH)

Page 19 text:

C. .1. rm: V, The Florist, State St. Phone 1281 17 If wo have no jokes on you, don’t get sore. If we have iokes on you, don’t ask for more. For the Varsity has a Tattler to publish soon. And they will probably have jokes not to be forgotten soon. At least, if you could hear them talk, You wouldn’t think they would make a balk As they have done years before. And if we can wait we will probably see one more. This isn’t a joke, serious matter. Ted—“Listen.” Sod—“That’s the houn' coming now.” Jerry—“That's our old cow.” Miss Kahler—“Have you any conflictione?” Philly—“Arithmetic and Arithmetic.” Mr. Smith says that the bookkeeping class had better get a job shovel ing smoke, they can’t do anything else.

Page 18 text:

16 THE TATTLER and shower baths before the boys, and illustrated to them the good of athletics. So let’s answer the plea for more school spirit, and everybody put his shoulder to the wheel and push. Just before the Ashtabula game. Coach Smith called the basketball players together and after several attempts to elect a captain, it was decided to wait until another time, and Merl Childs was placed in temporarily because no majority could be obtained for either of the candidates, Childs. Dunn, and Evans. Just before the Harbor game Childs was elected captain by a majority. A CONVERSATION BETWEEN TWO GREAT MEN. Robert Halliday, Woodrow Wilson. “Well, well, Bob! how are you? I am tickled to see you!” “Same to you Woody. How are you? I suppose you are still as great in your part of the world as 1 am in mine?” “Exactly. And are you still at C. H. S.? “Yes, I feel that 1 can run the school so much better while right on the job, and you are still at Washington?” “Tut, tut. Bob! Certainly. I can run the country so much better here. How is the faculty behaving at C. H. S.?” “Very well, so far, I assure you, though I’m very strict with them. How’s Congress?” “O pretty fair, how’s the team?” “Light, but fast, how’s the Tariff?” “Light, but slow, Bob. How’s Smith and Varsity?” “Both still slow.” “Too bad. Say, Bob, Old Horse, got any suggestions?” “Yes,—remodel that currency bill to suit Duff Brace. Kick Bryan out of office, and turn Republican.” “Thanks, I will. May I suggest—” “Surely.” “Tell III Henry to remodel his wheel, and stop Ted Quinn’s pompadour. Good-bye, Bob, I hear Bryan calling. Coming, Bill!” “Good-bye, Woody, Au Revoir. And then he Woodrow, Row, Row.” [Extract from Cleveland Plain Dealer.] John Hazeltine from Conneaut was stopping at the Statler hotel. He wanted to telephone to a town about thirty miles away. He asked the girl on the switch board to get him long distance and follow-ed it up with asking the price. “It will cost you fifty cents for three minutes.” she said, sweetly. “Fifty cents: Ye Gods!” cried John, “I didn’t want to buy stock in the company, I only wanted to talk a minute or so! Why! Why! In Conneaut we can call up hades for fifty cents!” “Yes, I know, sir,” replied the girl, “but isn’t that within your citv limits?”

Page 20 text:

18 THE TATTLER Fuller (in American History)—“Women ain’t fit to vote, ’cause they ain’t got enough sense. They wouldn’t know any more about voting than Mr. Davis.” As Mr. Henry is a chemistry teacher take his advice: Snow, mud, zero, rain, and sunshine, thoroughly mixed and rubbed in, is good for bicycles. Miss Kahler was asked to remove Philly, Tyler, Porter, and Graham out of the back part of the study hall because Titus, Hubbard, Hoare, Smith and several others have to wear glasses now. There was a young lady named Geraldine. She was very popular, but could never maintain A boy friend who would stay at a late hour. She had one but soon lost him. and the one she has now makes four. Green was first, but I don’t blame her, she let him go; Alton was next and Geraldine thought she had a nice beau. But along came a (ellow from we know not where, Geraldine took notice of him, for he had black hair. But he was a stranger, so you see very plain, When he got acquainted, something gave him a pain. So Claude got busy and cut Lee right out; This made Lee sore and he began to pout. But along came Geraldine once more. “What’s the matter?” asked she. Lee replied, “I’m sore, but never more.” Mr. Henry (thinking of gunpowder)—“What is potassium nitrate used for?” Tom —“Pickling.” Henrv-—“Yes, they are pickling the Mexicans with it now.” Hazel M.—“Dorothy, what is the word for Lord in German?” Dorothy—“Bill, I guess. Why did Helen Bauss cause so much disturbance when she went to sleep in the study hall? Because she was sleeping on the switch board. Mr. Williamson applied for a patent on the lock which was on the south door for a long time, but we believe he did not get it, as there is one of the old style on now.