Conneaut High School - Tattler Yearbook (Conneaut, OH)

Page 20 text:

18 THE TATTLER Cornell, to Mr. Henry, who is making an experiment in Physics—What have you? a violin? Mr. Henry—Yes, I’m getting ready for the next dance at Farmhand. Mr. H. (talking in Geometry class)—“Now suppose I was out last evening with my girl------------’’ Never mind the supposition. It is easy to prove it false. CLASSIFIED ADVERTISEMENTS. WANTED—A president for the so-called Varsity Society. WANTED—To know the reason Mr. Good did not go to the last Junior party. FOR RENT—One football suit in excellent condition as I have only used it once this year.—Clifford Childs. FOR SALE—A few beautiful society pins.—Mr. Eagles. THEATER—Star—A case of true love—A true story of a young man who walks around with an eighth grade boy every night after school and helps him deliver papers, in order that he may have a look at his lady love when she appears at the door for the paper. The hero is Edward Crombie; the heroine is Mabel Brown. BRIGHT SAVINGS BY BRIGHT PEOPLE. The Netherlands are in the Alps—Miss Griffey. The next fifty-five years saw five rulers, each one a different one,— M. Smith. The Flemish towns remained faithful to Queen Anne, the son of Charles.—Miss Wardman. We wonder what there is in the sounding of a fire bell that makes Buchanan feel so sad. If Miss Leet could run could she Chase Bromn? THE ECHO. The Good Fellowship club met at Risley’s on Monday, and Sunday nights last week and the week before. At the last meeting it was decided that an awning should be raised around the corner, as the standing room inside is getting to be rather limited. Mr. Davis—Do the stars rise and set? Winifred Clark—No, they just disappear. OVERHEARD IN THE GYM. Stone—Just wait until I get in form. From the Other End of the Hall—“About the only way you can get in form is to wear one of these fit me tight corsets.” Espy Eagles—Some one stole Mettie Hunt.

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C. J. FREW, The Florist, State St. Local Phone 2S1 17 Mr, H. to E. S.—Where is your Algebra? E. S.—I wore it out by hard study. Mr. H.—At any rate you didn’t wear it out by what you got out of it. Tyler in Geora.—“The square of the hypothesis is equal to the sum of the other two sides.” Freshman—“Why is Miss Burrington attending the Agricultural School ?” Soph—“Why, haven’t you heard? She and Miss Leet have bought a fruit farm.” Fresh.—“Well! If she thinks she can make fruit trees grow by talking good English to them, she is mistaken.” If Mr. Helman can haul around ten people in ten minutes how many can Albert Hall. If Mr. Helman should step on a triangle would it be a (wrecked angle). If Ralph is tired of chopping a tree le't Fred Hewitt. Mr. D. to Ray Laughlin—Ray, what are men called who, like Mr. Northrop, can write with both hands? Ray (promptly)—Amphibians.

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C. J. FREW, The Florist, State St. Ix cal Phone 281 19 Mettie Hunt—Oh, Dear! I can’t figure out dates. Russell Tobin,—the boy with the crimson hair, says his whiskers are so sandy that every time he shaves he raises so much dust that he cannot see his face in the mirror. Prof. Helman—Don’t you think the girls are making a mistake in taking up professional work? What they need is Domestic Science. They will soon be married and then the men will take care of them. Miss Burrington (promptly)—What are you going to do about the left overs ? We will now have a diet of worms.—Miss Ford. In American History (“Micky” Green)—“Say, Mr. Helman, how many dates are we to have?” Prof. Helman—“Well, Mr. Green, there won’t be as many as you have had in the last four months.” R. Stone broke all records for rank bluffs when he told Prof. Smith that the reason he did not pass Sihort Hand was that he had been pounding on the typewriter just before and his fingers were so stiff that he could not take the words down fast enough,— (and the beauty of it is, he never blushed). A. Hall—I hear Mr. Helman bought two books on debate, they cost him a dollar. J. Davis—Well! If he thinks the investment of a dollar will win that debate he is mistaken. If Charles Marcy should bury six persons a day how many could Mildred Dusenbury? Little drops of perspiration, Little grains of grit, The only way to show the varsity That we are really it. Town Sheriff at Austinburg when C. H. S. basketball team was there— “If you boys don’t behave, I’ll put you in the jail.” Whereupon the bunch took up a collection and wanted to bet $5 09 they could file their way out wibh a finger file.—Murder! Police!