Commerce High School - Commerce Yearbook (Cleveland, OH)

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An English class, reading “Franklin’s Autobiography,” was told to memorize a certain quotation. A boy asked, “Shall we learn it by heart?” Teacher: “I don’t care; you can learn it by liver if you want to.” Miss Richardson (in History of Commerce) : “Frank, what is the depth of the modern steamship?” Frank (dreaming) : “Why—the vessel is as deep as the highest building is high.” Student: “May we use our arithmetic for the tables?” Miss Beman: “No, use the tops of the desks for tables.” Mr. Warfield: “How does the dog regulate the heat of his body?” Frank Zwemer: “By shaking himself.'’ Miss Beman to Josephine, (who is trying to give a mathematical definition): “Well, Josephine, what is a book?” Josephine: “It is a thing with two covers and some leaves inside.” Forward to her guard, (during a basket-ball game): “Get out of my way, I want to shoot a basket.” Heard in Arts: “Put your center in the middle.” Myrtle Behrcnd is German, but Myrtle claims she made herself an Irish crochet collar. She also said that her mother made “Welch’s Grape Juice.” Now can you make out the combination? 146

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Mr. Twiggs: “Edna, are you warm enough?’' Edna (looking at the thermometer) : ‘'No, sir, I am rather chilly.” Mr. Zechar: “Adam, what is registered mail?” Adam: “Mail that has its life insured.” Answer in English test. Four different kinds of novels are Realistic, Romantic, Historical and Elastic novels. (Does the last mean a fish story?) Ethel Dambrow (in English) : “How did Franklin get prescriptions (subscriptions) for the library?” A sophomore bookkeeping class had neglected to put the addresses of the different parties in the ledger. The teacher gave them the addresses as they asked for them, and when the expense account was reached a little German girl called out, “And what is his address, please?” Mr. Zechar: “Celia, what is cochineal?” Celia: “Why—cochineal is some kind of breakfast food.” Miss Slaymaker (in perspective drawing): “How many pairs of eyes have wc?” Lillian (with glasses on): “Two pairs.” Wm. Gartman (in Art) : “When do we finish this?” Teacher: “When you get through.” It must be that you can have a choice of beverages at East Commerce, for when a girl asked to get a drink of water, she was told that she might if she was sure it would be nothing but water. Miss Allen: “Emily, what is the meaning of connoisseur?” Emily: “The title of a Frenchman.” Miss Beman (in Math.): “Esther, (apparently inattentive) finish this theorem. Where are you going to start?” Esther: “Where Myrtle left off.” Miss Richardson (to one of the Kollic twins) : “Paul, is that you or Julian sitting there?” 1-15

Page 149 text:

RHYMES. There was a young teacher in room number seven. Who ever and ever taught math to eleven. From morning till night she would draw and construct Till into your brain some knowledge she stuck. When La Verna was a little tot, We used to call her “Flat.” But now we think e’en less of her, Because she wears that rat. There is a lad whom we all know, Who to Commerce High does go, That later wise men he may show. How to make their business grow Ili-diddle-diddle the cat and the fiddle. The cow jumped over the moon; The students ran to see the fun. The orchestra’s getting in tune. There was a young lad named Wayne. Who went up in an aeroplane; He went to see Mars, And the rest of the stars; But. alas, he came back in a train. There was a young lady called “Dutch,” Whom for looks no one could touch. When she went away, For a short time to stay. Every one cried very much. There was a lady from Commerce, Her Spelling she did rehearse. But Math she deplored. While Arts she explored. And delighted in History of Commerce. 147