Columbia University School of Engineering - Yearbook (New York, NY)

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The 1934 COLUMBIA ENGINEER really libellous or not and how the Authorities would take it. But occasionally there would be space at the bottom of the page that required filling and that's where I came in. f'That little thing I found, on the ground. is an article I prize, since its size, makes it handy for the pocket, and when you gently knock it, on a house or tree or rock, it goes off with murderous bang, while you cut away or hang, and the answer is, a bomb. XYell, I didn't get fired even when I was raised to the pedestal of Science Editor in my senior year, and that was because I was a sneak. All the Editors were sneaks. That is to say, they told tales out of school. And this is how it worked. For instance, I wrote a doggerel entitled The Universal Expert, a libellous skit on the Professor of Garbage Disposal who really believed he was the Great I Am. But my friend jones, the Editor from the Medical School, made a copy in his own handwriting which I carefully filed away. The day after that copy of the journal appeared I got a note saying the Dean would be pleased to see me at 4 p. m. I-Ie spent fifteen minutes telling me what, a filthy rag the Iournal was and that the Senate ought to abolish it and all the Editors ought to be sent down, and finally came to the point that the feelings of the Professor of Garbage Disposal had been deeply hurt and we'd have to apologize on our hands and knees-and then I interrupted him by blurting out, But Mr. Dean, you've got it all wrong. The article was written by that bum jones of the Medical School and was supposed to be a take-off on Old Professor X, the man that teaches IrIomeopathic Surgery, and we all told him it oughtn't to be published. And I showed him the copy in -Iones' handwriting with his name at the bottom. Of course, there had always been great rivalry between Science and the Medical School, especially between the two faculties, and the Dean admitted that as applied to Professor X, the article was really very funny, I heard later that he had called in the Prof. of G. D. and told him what I had said and the latter on re-reading the article said it was the best skit that had appeared in years, for he c0uldn't stand Prof. X at all. But to return to the question of poetry, wouldn't it be wonderful if some of our difficult and abstruse courses could be dished up in verse! Wfhat an Epic one could write on Power or Strength of Materials! I once thought I'd like to write a summary of Physical Metallurgy in blank verse. 'Which shows how cC0lZfI'1l'Ill?lI on 7lP.1'fI7lZgCj LARGE CENTRIFUGE IN MINING LABORATORY Forty-three

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The 1934 COLUMBIA ENGINEER MINING AND METALLURGICAL ENGINEERS AND FACULTY Scheer Lilley Hunt Toering Poole Blond Baldizzi Barrett Heuzzizzg Morrill Beyer Kern Pine! Foote Allen Read Taggart CCIIIIPIJFII Burley Ietfe To the Editor, Coimitbia Engineer. DE.'XR MR. SIEGER: Wfhile duly conscious of the honor of being asked to contribute to this yearis Engineer, I feel I must beg to be excused. I know I promised I'd give you something, but on looking over the articles that have appeared in the last half dozen issues I realize I am totally incapable of writing anything suitable. I had in mind Writing you something on the subject of a i'Plea for Poetry in a Practical Period, in fact of advocating that a course in rhyming be added to the pre- engineering schedule. You never know when you may need it. If asked to make an extemporaneous speech at a dinner, it is so handy to have tucked away in your cigarette case half a dozen limericks which are new to your audience. They go over wonderfully, especially since Repeal, e.g., Dlye ken 601' Professor Maciink, who invented the chromium sink, he plated out metals in all kinds of kettles, which always produced a strange stink. XV hen I was between six and seven I graduated from the Kindergarten to the Grammar School, so called because they started you out on Latin Grammar- and to make it more attractive we learned the rules in verse. Common are to either sex, Artifex and Opifexf' etc., and so forth. Like taking old-fashioned castor oil smothered in Hsassapai-ella. I suppose it was this early introduction that infected me, for I have always had a leaning towards poetry. VVhen I got to College I had the unhappy knack of getting elected to all the jobs requiring plenty of hard work but rewarded with more kicks than halfpence, such as Secretary of this, Treasurer of that, Manager of itother. My crowning glory was Assistant Editor of the University journal Ca monthly, thank goodnessj. That was some fun. The Editors, one from each School or College, used to meet and discuss the contributions on hand, mostly written by the said Editors, which discussion usually hinged around the question of whether the article was Forty-two

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The 1934 COLUJIBIA ENGINEER great minds often think along the same lines, for shortly afterwards there appeared those thrilling verses entitled Science Simplified for Steel IVO1-ks Stenographersu by my friend, Captain Gerald Firth, of the Firth-Sterling Steel Company. At the risk of being accused of i'borrowing some of his lines I want to give you an idea of what might be done. Preceding Metallography I studied, first, Petrography lVhich deals with structures found in rocks and slags. I then applied this knowledge To some Ores I found in College lVhich the Miners used to stow away in bags. But the structures of the metals, Be they melted down in kettles Or rolled to sheet or drawn out into wire, Soon took my whole attention And I found that under tension The grains were elongated, but entire. I found in the beginning That annealing produced twinning Wfith a corresponding drop in tensile strengthg VVhile on reapplying strain Hardness returns again In proportion to the increase in the length. Then we took up the alloys Wfhich the engineer employs And found they had dendritic segregation, Which will often disappear On annealing, for it's clear Theylre, after all, a crystal aggregation. 'W e soon learned that Martensite Is minutely-grained Ferrite Wfith sub-microscopic Cementite in suspension. But it took us many years To find that this occurs In alloys far too numerous to mention. - Of course, I could run on in this way, taking up each topic we covered in Metallurgy l4l from Ambrac to Zimac, from Carbaloy to Wfidia, from I-Ionda's magnets to Copper-Beryllium chisels, but these few lines will show you what might be done, and you can imagine the application in other lines of Human Endeavor, I mean lecture courses. And so, apologizing once more for not being able to oblige with an article for your very admirable publication, I am, Yours sincerely, XVILLIAM CAMPBELL. The Idcs of rlfarclz, 1934. F01'fy-four