Columbia University College of Pharmacy - Apothekan Yearbook (New York, NY)

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endpoint on his first determination, but he was truly one of the great leaders of the West. Sam ' s unforgettable advice to some of us is still uncontestably the greatest. ' Why don ' t you just give up and open a dry goods store? ' Oh well, thank God we didn ' t have to . . . In September ' 53 we were still sitting tall in the saddle. However, some of the boys dropped along the wayside to start their lives anew. This was the year of danger and peril. Explosions and fires were not uncommon — in fact each able bodied man was assigned to the fire extinguishing squad. Terror lurked in every corner ... of the Chemistry lab. Before one went up to room 61 it was advisable to see Gaylord Hellerbach on insurance rates. Even in Chemistry lecture, as endless formulas and reactions were being scribbled on the board, men shook in terror, afraid of receiving a threatening note from the Grey Ramus or the Sundance Kid ... to band against these outlaws, Marshall Rubin asked for volunteers for the Vigilante Committee. Barn dances and town meetings were held with the sole function of banning these two desperados. But as the formulas got more confusing and the lectures turned into dribbles, the desperados left for different stompin ' grounds, along with Frank Berger, our dearly departed friend. Down on the ground floor of the ranch house, there was mystery behind a door marked 10. In there dwelt a man known as Slick Joe the Dude. One look from Joe and boys melted like Cocoa Butter. But as the prescriptions were being knocked out, this wrangler changed from a hard desperado to an all right hombre. Much of what we know today we owe to him. We learned everything from how Eskimos build igloos in Greenland, to how to apologize to a sawbones when calling him — hoping you ' re not bothering him when he has such a busy schedule. Everything in this lab had to do with technique. Practicals were given ad lib. Armed with USP and NF we were asked to compound concoctions with one hand on the telephone ready to call the doc to ask for permission to DTD or change an overdose or to tell him that you spotted an incompatibility and dispense the Rx correctly. The doctor was kept awfully busy. Overseers were constantly walking around ready with red pencil to spot wrong techniques and ask ' How many IT you make ' ... ' I made one suppository too many — what should I do with it? ' . . . The old prospector, Mortimorlie ' s uncle was reintroduced to us in Physiology. All with educated fingers were eligible for this course. Fingers could produce all sorts of stimuli; contraction and relaxation, tetanus, clonus. The death rate of frogs was enlarged 100 fold, in fact, they were being pithed so fast that an emergency was declared. Not having completely worn our fingers to the bone, Wee Willie was back for a return performance. This course was very stimulating, or so it was to Blackjack Lou Stone who had enough energy to bring Remington to school every day. Crystal

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When I was a lad, eating seemed a normal process to me, and all I thought about was the enjoyment of the food. After taking zoology with Mortimorlie ' s uncle, strange things happened to me. I could feel the salivary juices wetting the food as it was pushed down; I could feel the food sloshing around in my stomach . . . there goes pepsin; or was it trypsin? To complicate my mental state, I was asked to dissect cats. Yes, mother, real dead cats. We were asked to display what we knew on practical exams and on little tests of our ability. ' Don ' t twist that shaft, Doc ' After finishing our mutilation of the cats and dumping them into the garbage can in the rear, except for those left on the Brighton Beach Express during the rush hour, we had to show the other side of our characters by learning the finer things in life; namely Nature. But ? we all knew the orange, anyway we thought we did, until practical time came. Dangerous Frank James gave tests that were harder than doing the Sunday Times crossword puzzle even though they were only ten minute quizzes. What did all those dots on the page mean? ' The of the only when occurs. ' After finish- ing my first year here. I decided I would do better next year because I got THE CLUE. Waal, pardners, gather closer while I tell you of our adventures during the second year. We were no longer greenhorns, jest ornery and hankering for trouble. We were in such a hurry to get to the north range that those who drove had car races along Broadway. Those that had no cars shared cabs at 35 pesos apiece, and when we got there, what did we do? We played hockey with a milk carton. Anyway, I remember the boys who cut out of physics lab and the other boys who answered for them. Why, I knew at least six men who were known by three different names in the various physics labs. Then there were the problem classes held on the first floor and the mad scramble out the window. Once, on the way out of a class, Daddy Lee stealthily removed the doorknob and every one was locked in until he relented and inserted the doorknob and let us out. Well, 1 reckon we all had a ball up on the North Range, but back home we really had it good. There was Slick Joe the Dude who tried to teach us Arithmetic. What a riot that was! ' Eddie Kaplan, will you tell me how many grains in a gram? ' What? I dunno. I thought they was the same ' . Then out from nowhere came Wee Willie the Kid, A youthful gunslinger with that cute smile saying, ' Your desk is dirty ' . Then there was the syrup group. These tumbleweeds used too much cotton in the percolators and waited for weeks on end for the syrup to pass through. Wee Willie shot all his victims in the same place and they all went out to Colorado to recuperate in the salubrious climate. Last but not least we met the Great White Father . . . Long Sam the Lone Wolf, whose biting tongue could hurt more than a bullwhip. ' I reckon I ' ll teach you wranglers a little sense of .responsibility ... 60 official assays for tomorrow, and I ' ll be on Broadway at high noon if anyone is interested. ' Gunhappy Sam even overshot his ■ -7, ■I I ■

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£ i H K £ o form, powder form, deliquescent, efflorescent and preparation . . . these descriptive par- ticulars had to be known in order to pass. Then there were introduced problems in isotonicity . . . always there are problems ! ! ! In the fall a young man ' s fancy turns to thoughts of the cambium layer . . . Yes sir, Frank James was back again. But this year we started off with our best foot forward — yes, footwork, a stroll through the trees, shrubs, corners, and crevices of Central Park. Here we were told how to spot differences in types of trees and leaves, and, of course our tour ended with a long epilogue on a strange specie called the Gingko Tree, Iging ko, n. Japan, ginko, gingko, from Chinese yin-hing, the silver apricot; yin, silver, and king, apricot. A genus of the Conijerae allied to the yews, native to Japan and China. A Japanese tree, Gingko biloba, cultivated for its orna- mental foliage: called also Maidenhair Tree ) Well anyway, you might smell of it. The Committee on Committees will meet in th ' Men ' s Lounge during the break. This was the course in Business Management given by Big Len. We were told the different aspects of buying and operating stores, and then we broke up into com- mittees and gave speeches relating to the retail pharmacists and pharmacy in general. This was the time to catch up on the crossword puzzle ftnd send notes to Gans from his mother. ' But in my youth, when I was young, ... ! ' To end a typical day. we all assembled with Professor Gaylord Hellerbach. Joe Zilch was always the outlaw in this Economics class — and when in doubt, debit Joe Zilch. Here we were taught how to become accountants and keep a set of books. This was done just to make sure that your accountant wasn ' t a goniff. ' As June approached, we were heading down the last trail, and many of us were to become that magical word, SENORES. Waal, Sonny, as the smoke cleared, I could see that there wuz only 98 of the original gang left. Angelo was knocked out by a chemical explosion, Rich, poor old Rich, by some adulterated medication. Very few of us have managed to get this far without a flesh wound or a little loss of hide. Yes sir, mister, them wuz the days when men were men and women loved them for it. Again this year we were down in Room 10, but this time under the tutelage of Doc Brown. This course in Dispensing climaxed our four years in Dispensing. ' Here, the wildest prescriptions were compounded from ' my old files ' . ' Don ' t forget each prescription has its own little peculiarity about it — they are given to you for a purpose . But after a few weeks, we ' d rustle over to the lab and knock out those Rx ' s, as if we had the file. This year we were introduced to two new hombres who came all the way from Ohio and California to bestow upon the seniors of CUCP their knowledge. Mike, the Cortisone Kid. a Westerner from way back, talked so western that we could not even understand him to take notes. What the heck is a rutt? To add insult ; , i