Chesterton High School - Singing Sands Yearbook (Chesterton, IN)

Page 23 text:

'wr' ff, 1 .1 in ' , v-nx1,1 ,, fps- . n1.1 Q 5 -,QP , J., .

Page 22 text:

THE GRADUATE. 23 Decrees of Fate Oliver Reese. Dear Classmates: 'Twas only yesterday that you requested me to consult the oracle concerning our fate. as a class. I visited the oracle yesterday night and waited for a reply. My reply came in a soft harmonious echo. Class of 1912. C. H. volume Eve hundred and ni11ety two. chapter seventy nine, 'Fate of the Living' I en- tered the labyrinth. where the library of these ponde1'ous volumes. were placed. Lighting a candle on entering the library. I at once began to look for the volume designated to me by the oracle. After finding the desired volume. I hastily turned to the seventy-ninth chapter. and, classmates. my heart fairly jumped from my breast, as my eyes rested upon the head- line to this chapter, The Fate of the Class of 1912, Chesterton High School. Under the headline was this quotation. Toi1 is the lot of all, and bitter woe the fate of many. Surely this is true with us. I will now attempt to tell each of you. briefly. what I read of your fate. tfIvy , you were the first victim. After iinish- ing High School, you enter college to complete geometry. You finish your course with no honors. Then you decide never to look into another book, so you begin work as a seam- stress. Acquiring a large fortune. you decide to marry, but you have to wait three years. until the next leap year. Alas. the following year. you will be a widow. This title you will carry with you until your death in 1975. Ernest. your fate came next. You think you have won enough laurels. after finishing high school, so you do not pursue your studies fur- ther. Your only regret is that you have no more problems in Physics to conquer. You will never become rich because you will spend all your money on girls. but still you are to re- main a bachelor. At fifty. you have all your Titian colored hair jerked from your head be- cause one of your girls does not like its color. and after all this misery. she jilts you because you are bald-headed. You live in a house be- side the road and you are a friend to man. You will die happy in your seventy-third year. Clara, do you desire to hear of your fate? It is true that one year after leaving High School. you are married a11d thus do 11Of meet with the experiences some of your classmates meet with. You will be happy in domestic life, never have to meet your husband at one o'clock a. m. with the rolling pin. nor throw the cream pitcher at him, when he politely asks you how many cups of cement you used in baking those biscuits. In fact, the whole of your life will be one of peace. You will live long enough to see your grand-children play the role of peda- gogue. Classmates. my heart was in my mouth. when I found my name the next in the list. ln fact. I felt just as all feel when they ask their teacher if they have passed. After leaving High School I have no thoughts of the future and enter a university. a year later. I remain here only two years because I read of an article which said that the average college man is only worth six dollars a week. and I knew already where I could earn five dollars a week. so I embark upon life's sea. I hold this job for fifteen years. at five dollars per. and when my boss offers to raise my wages to six dollars per week. I fall in a dead faint. a11d am not able to re- turn to work. As a result of this fright. I am unable to do any kind of manual labor. I travel extensively in the southern part of Eu- rope to regain my health. Returning north again in 1945. I am married. VVhile placing lightning rods o11 my mansion one stormy day in 1969, I will be struck by lightning and in- stantly killed. Edna, because of your uncontrolable love for study, you enter a normal school preparatory to teaching school but alas. you marry a few weeks after finishing your normal course. You spend your honey moon travelling across the Sahara Desert. On returning home. you and your husband will settle on a large ranch in New Mexico. five miles from the nearest habita- tions and fifteen miles from any village. How long you will live there. I do not know. for here your history abruptly ended.

Page 24 text:

24 THE GRADUATE. Claude. you are destined to be a traveling salesman. After leaving High School. you be- come an agent for a soap factory. After ped- dling soap for a few years. you save enough money. by living cheaply. to buy out the firm. A few years after you become head of the Hrm. it becomes bankrupted. Hut luck is with you for John D. Carnegie will donate you enough money to begin business again. About ten years later you take your oldest son i11to the tirm and now it will be known as V. W. Brown S: Son. Iintil your death you will be actively interest in the soap business. Mildred here's what I read concerning your fate. Mildred Shaner finishes High School at Vhesterton in 1912. She then enter a university in the southern part of Florida. Completing her course here. she will cross the waters to study music in llerlin. In 1925 she returns to the I'ni- ted States to teach music. Iler pupils are mostly professors in music. who desire to still broaden their musical abilities. She is also a stanch sutfragette and for this reason will never marry. VVhen she dies. she will bear the title of being the oldest woman in her native state. Flossie. you were the last in this list of fame. After leaving the High School you enter a school for girls in Kalamazoo, Michigan. No, it is not a reform school, but instead, a school where domestic science is taught to the advant- age of those who desire to marry before they have learned it at home. You finish this course in six years. Then you will go to Paris to teach some of the best French chefs how to Cook. Yes. you will marry and your husband will also be a chef, so that perhaps he can do the cooking. while you go out visiting and come home late. You will be to your husband as .Ioan of Arc is to Franceg practically the bread winner of the family. Upon the death of your husband, you will take your children back to the United States and will place them in an orphanage. while you earn a livelihood by cook- ing in a prison. You will die at the ripe old age of one hundred years. Vlosing the volume, I had just been reading and placing it back on the shelf, I wiped the cold sweat from my brow. and glad that our fate was not worse, and that all anxiety was swept away, I left the labyrinth to return holne to write you all that I had read. Now hoping that no suicides will be committed by any of you. I will submit this decree of fate to you. Modern Arithmetic He was teaching his girl arithmetic He said that was his mission. Ile kissed her once, he kissed her twice. And said. Now that's additionf 1 And while he added kiss to kiss. With joyful satisfaction. He stopped to r-ateh a few from her. And said, lit-ar. that's suhtraetionf And still they lingered there to kiss, With mutual elation, The bold lad doubled up the sum And said, t'That's multiplication. 77 Her father came and raised his boot And snorted in derision. That chap struck earth two miles away, Pa said, 'l'hat's long division. 7