Charlotte High School - Delphian Yearbook (Charlotte, MI)

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FEATURE The CHflfiHffln On Frankie— “Fine, fine. he nodded as Benny Goodman's tenor man finished a hot chorus in one of his late records, he was really out of the world! Thus did we find Frankie Prindle—enjoying his favorite pastime and hobby, heatin' it out with his favorite band. After he'd placed the record in its place we settled down to the business of the evening. We soon found, after a moment's chat, that his one interest from day- light to dark is music. During the week one will find him spending his afternoons at the high school teaching young ent huiasists to keep that rhythm straight; on week ends one will find him at Stale swinging out with his own hand. Of the latter Frankie is very proud, for it arose from a five piece outfit playing for a few dollars a night to a nine piece band that plays nothing but the hottest swing. He hopes to make the top. realizes that it will take hard work and diligence to a complete mastery of the funda- mentals. Frankie mounted his guns when we showed a distaste for swing because to him it is the only thing. “The trouble is.” he said, “that the majority of people don't know enough about music to appreciate swing. Mr. Prindle. with a clarinet, ventur- ed into the world of music for the first tinn while in the fifth grade. In two years he was tootin’ in the com- munity band under Mr. Higby whose baton he followed for eight years. While in high school he played in a clarinet quartet: he bashfully admit- ted that the. group took second in a statewide contest. In answer to a final quest regarding the ladies he replied. Too busy right now. but one never knows, does one? NAMES IN MUSIC “The Big Apple”: Glen Blood. Ten Pretty Girls : Bob Sparks. “You Couldn't Be Cuter : Gene King. “Let That Be a Lesson to You : The band, speaking to Zeeland. “Josephine : Bud Loucks. “Who Are We to Say?”: Sisson and Weaver. “Donkey Serenade”: Girls’ Glee club. “My Very Good Friend the Milk- man”: Sterling. “Joseph-Joseph : Mrs. Noggle. “Goody-Goody”: the Seniors, gradu- ation night. “Whistle While You Work : The janitors. “HI Babe! Hey Babe”: Messrs. Go- bel. Koch. McCall, and Rohlfs. On the Sentimental Side”: Tull is (?) “Dipsy Doodle”: Remember the Journalism carnival? “Rosalie : Bruce Garlinghouse. “You’re an Education”: Doreen XI- col. “Don't Be That Way : Otto. “Two Bouquets”: The Shaver twins. “Martha : Gaylord Cole. “Heigh Ho”: The Seven Dwarfs. “Tipi-Tip: Tin’. Kippy-Kippy-KIn. Kin. “It Ain't Goin' Rain No More : Ara- bian desert. Beware Playphobia ! ! ! Into each person's life there comes a time when that person feels it is necessary for him to venture into the realms of the sacred bard. Shake- speare. Ordinarily not too much damage is done while the person is under the spell of this drug, wr.te-a- playphiue. which causes this strange form of wanderlust. Although such a dangerous opiate as write-a-playphine should be con- trolled. there is little known about It. How it works, where it comes from, what form it is in. how it is spread— still are mysteries to tne world of science. No one knows when the menace is going to strike and in what form. . Occasionally the result of this mad drug is a tragedy, sometimes it takes the form of a comedy, or a fantasy. Although we do not know which of the above types the following is we are made to realize that this dread dope, write-a-playphine. should be curbed. THE GREAT PLAY By George First Act (At the rise of the curtain. Little Petunia is standing in the center of the stage all alone.) L. P.: I'm trying to help and oh— why does—every—one—have to be so mean? I could Just cry. In fact. I think I will. (Sinks on davenport wailing tears left and right.) (Enter cruel villian. John Mush-in Mouth, with long black mustache awry. Villian: Aha. my sweet lilac time. nd what is the matter with my sweet Little Petunia girly this fine, bright, morning that the rent comes due and your pappy can't pay it. Ha-ha-ha.” (Villian goes off left amid boos and overripe fruit from the audience.) (Little Petunia sits up suddenly and wipes her (ears on her petticoat. She smiles suddenly and snaps her fingers.) L. P.: I have it! I'll mortgage our cow. Gladiola, the one that gives two quarts of milk every other day. And If that isn’t enough—I’ll—why I’ll even —mortgage—Orchid, our hen that lays three eggs every two weeks, rain or shine. But I just couldn't do that to Orchid, not after the way she gave four eggs one week! (Little Petunia sinks into the daven- port and starts weeping again.) (Enter Bachelor-Button, the Hero. He enters the stage right and goes over to poor L. P. on the davenport.) Cur- tain falls on first act. Second Act (Same scene as first except L. P. is still on davenport crying but neither iero nor villian are to be seen.) (Enter mammy) Mammy: “Say there. L. P.. don’t you think inayl»e you had better marry John Mush-in-Mouth so we can ray off the mortgage and save the homestead? (Mammy means the rent here in- stead of the mortgage but she means well.) (L. P. refuses to answer anyway, she is so enraged by this insult to her love for Bachelor-Button. Mammy goes out upstage and Gladiola wanders in off right. Glad is an ample sized animal of reddish brown and white spots. L. P. looks at Glad—and stains to weep on the davenport. John M-in-M creeps to the middle of the stage and then slobbers over the heroine. She hits him one but in vain. Just as he has her down, sitting on her. and about to tie her to the rail- road tracks while the train whistles in the distance. Glad leads with a rear hind left to the rear. John sails over the heads of the first row Into the gallery, where he remains for the est of the play, throwing gum and F. F. A. Judging Team Takes First Place Charlotte took first place with a high score of 1010.5 in the cattle judg- ing contest which was entered by 137 schools from all over the state during Future Farmers' Week at Michigan State College May 5 and 6. Robert Davis was third high man in the state in the same contest with a score of 345.9. Duane Claflin. Robert Davis. Junior Grier. Ralph Hines. William McClin- tock, Russell Spotts, Gloyd Stadel. Clare Tharp. Richard Tharp. Fred Van Vleck. and Donald Riley made up Charlotte's livestock and dairy cattle judging team. From this list Davis. Van Vleck. and Grier were picked to go to Kansas City in October for the national contest. Duane Claflin was named by Wilford Rohlfs. F. F. A. adviser, as alternate and McClintock and D. Riley will also act if an emergency arises. Leslie Bracy, James Caughey. Clar- ence Hoffner. Stanley Horn, Howard Newsome. Duane Robu. Dale Shu- maker. Neil Tomlinson, James Tracy, and L. Vierk judged grain and potatoes. W lliam Garvey. Clarence Jane, and Prank Kline judged dairy cattle and took fourth place in farm manage- ment in which 36 schools competed. John Mush-in-Mouth We Know Them By— their laugh: Harriet Patrick. Lois Pryor. their car: Wayne Cottrell, Dick Manicom. Bill Brake. their height: Jim Tracy. Dora Wil- kinson. Lee Willis. their hair: Barb Hamilton. Fran. Higby. Russell Nash. their smile: Max Tullis. Ross Bel- yea. Mr. McCall. their wisdom: most of the faculty, their voice: Susie Fielder. Sebert Willett. Eileen Sisson. their orchestra: Bob Cove. Carl Clark. Frankie Prindle. their hobby: Helen Foster. Jack Garlinghouse. Gene King, their job: any paper boy. their eyes: Carl Paine. Pat Beech- ler. Leone Haddix. their dignity: Mary Mellor. Shirley Clay. Lois McIntyre. their dimples: Eleanor Belyea. Bet- ty Sparks. Stanley Rogers. their bluffing: Ed. Morey. Johnny Sherman. Dorothy Otto. their procrastination: Jo Murray. Nan Rowley. Neil Clever. their ambition: - - - -fill in here, their mildness: Harley Flower. Clarence Jane. Bill Garvey. their friendliness: Bob Dunning. El dred Toutant. Gloria Beebe. oeanuts down on the bald heads be- low.) Curtain closes amidst much booing and cheering. Act Three (Hero Bachelor-Button comes In and takes L. P. into his arms, she was crying on the davenport, and crushes her bosom-ward.) Curtain closes on last act amid much cheering. How It Started Yearbooks are published by senior classes of almost every high school, university and college in the country. This annual publication usually con- tains the pictures of the members of the faculty, the graduating class, the lower classes, the athletic teams, and sometimes vnrious club organizations. The book also contains events of the past year, jokes, and a sports page. “The Delphian” Starts Many years ago Charlotte Hi began publishing such a book. It was called the “Delphian , and had a paper cover. At first the price was set at fifty cents, but as the annual was im- proved the cost was increased to one dollar and twenty-five cents. When the journalism and senior classes suspended publication after the 1932 edition the Delphian was a book eleven inches by eight inches in size. By each senior’s picture was printed a well known saying that fitted the personality of the person. Novel pictures and many jokes adorned the back pages of the book. Publishing the “Delphian” and the Orange Black was quite a strain on the treasury department of the publications department. Everybody liked the Delphian and thought it was a fine annual. Harlan McCall, journalism teacher and adviser to the Orange Black staff, decided to drop the Delphian and publish an an- nual with less cost to the student body and still edit the school paper. A de- cision was reached by the class who decided that an annual that was to de- pict the complete history of C. H. S. was to take the place of the much loved Delphian . The editor of the 1932 Delphian was Robert Klevorn with Genevieve Huber as business manager. McCall Names The Book The new book was to give active accounts of high school life. Posters were put up and the whole school was in a turmoil as to what the new an- nual was to be like. Mr. McCall thought of a name, the Charhlan . which was accepted. Charhlan” means Charlotte high annual. It was to be a sixteen page lmoklet with seventeen issues of the “Orange Black bound together. William Cox and Ruth Striugham were the editors and Clifton Kelley was business man- ager. Organizations were to pay but eight dollars instead of the former ten dol- lars to have their pictures in the an- nual. Seniors were to have theirs in free of charge . The cost was fifty cents. Paper covers were used at first, but the quality was increased and on the '37 issue the first stitched imitation leather cover was used. The latter issue was sent away to be bound while previous ones w'ere bound by the McGrath-DeFoe company in Char- lotte Many of the students and faculty thought the change was for the.better. We wonder what our students of to- day think? liachelor-Hutton page eighteen

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fPCCTf Cage Team Has Average Of .500 The 1937-38 Charlotte Orioles under ih direction of Coach Malcolm Gol»el rl«MMd the season with seven victories aud seven defeats for a percentage of .500. Defeat Eaton Rapids After the local basketball squad won over Hast Lansing 19-17, lost to Hast- ings 18-19. and lost to Mason 22-12. they defeated their rivals Eaton Rap- Ids 28-25. The Islanders had. the previous season, defeated the Orioles three times, twice in scheduled con- tests and once in the district tourna- ment. Results of the rest of the basketball season are ns follows: The Orioles won the match with Grand Ledge 22- 21. lost to St. Johns 22-29, lost to East Lansing 17-24. defeated Howell 31-20. won over Grand I edge 42-25, lost to Mason 16-22. were defeated by St Johns 24-30. lost to Eaton Rapids 25-39, de- feated Hastings 20-14. and downed Howell 24-21. How They Stand The following statistics show the personal rankings of the various play- ers: Years Nani»» Grade Played Pos. Pts. Ladd Jr. 2 F 134 Chandler Jr. 2 C F 72 Tullis Jr. 3 C F 62 Toutant Jr. 3 F G 52 Rogers Sr. 2 G 26 Tracy So. 2 C 13 Cheney Sr. 3 F 7 Raker Jr. 3 F 6 Garling’se Sr. ' 3 C F 3 Roberts Jr. 3 C F 2 During the District Basketball Tour- nament, hopes ran high for a new trophy for the school. All district tournament games were held on the local gym floor. The Orioles met Eaton Rapids for the first game of the tournament and defeated them 41- 34. Next in line came Hastings but after a hard fought game the night before the locals were downed 23-19, and Hastings went home with the trophy. Coach Gobel stated. We were handi- capped in every game because of lack of height. Every team we played held a heighth advantage over us. When Tracy wasn’t playing, the tallest man on the floor was Murray Chandler, who is about 5’ 10 . Although we were handicapped for height, we made up for it in speed and clever ball hand- ling. ' One of the team’s outstanding weak- nesses was missing free throws. A record of such is as follows: Made Misse 3 East Lansing 1 Hastings 9 7 Mason 2 Eaton Rapids 6 Grand Ledge 10 10 Si Johns 6 5 East Lansing 1 Howell 7 9 Grand Ledge 7 5 Mason 4 4 St. Johns 2 Eaton Rapids 8 4 Hastings 0 Howell 6 • 62 Basketball Standings W L | Mason 9 1 { Eaton Rapids .... 3 2 • St. Johns 8 4 ! Charlotte 5 t Howell 9 Grand Ledge 1 9 Regional Champions Front Row—Murray Chandler. Raymond Snyder. Max Tullis, Dale Bryan, Gail Cheney. Dorr Love, Russoll Bradley, William Reefman, Lester Roberts. Second Row—Charles Hughes. Kenneth Bruce. Lawrence Hammond, Jim Tracey. Robert Huber. Jack Youngs. Edward Packard. Clare Tharp. Back Row—Harold Mayhew, Wayne Wagner. Stanley Burt, Charles Briggs, Charles Widrig, Homer Braden, Coach Gobel. Bartholomew’s Freshmen Win Junior High Title Two ninth grade teams, four eighth grade teams, and five seventh grade teams made up the junior high inter- class basketball league for the 1937-38 season. Captains for the ninth grade teams were: Howard Thompson, and Harold Carman; eighth grade. Londan Cole. Wayne Terwilliger. Dale Bartholomew, and Leland Wendell; seventh grade. Homer Parish. Duane Nichols. Ray- mond Rogers. David Shaull, and Charles Gordon. Dale Bartholomew’s ninth grade team defeated Leland Wendell’s eighth grade team in the playoffs. 33 to 24. to win the championship. Wayne Ter- williger’8 eighth grade team finished second and Leland Wendell’s took third. This was the first year the junior high basketball league has been taken seriously and in a few years these boys will form the nucleus of the high school basketball team. Final Team Standings W L Dale Bartholomew ........... 9 1 Leland Wendell ............. 9 1 Wayne Terwilliger .......... 9 1 Charles Gorden ............. 7 3 Raymond Rogers ............. 5 5 Linden Cole ................ 4 6 Duane Nlcol ................ 3 7 Howard Thompson ............ 2 8 David Shaull ............... 2 8 Homer Parish ............... 0 10 District Cage I ournament Held in Local Gymnasium The first district basketball tourna- ment ever to be staged in Charlotte was held in the high school gym March 4 and 5. Teams participating w’ere Charlotte. Eaton Rapids. Hastings. Olivet. Bellevue. Springport. and Ver- montville. Hastings and Olivet emerg- ed the winners and received the trophies. Charlotte’s first night victory over Eaton Rapids proved to be the thriller of the tournament. The game was very much in doubt until the last quarter when Charlotte scored enough points for the margin of victory. In the class C” games, the same night. Olivet de- Charlotte Wins Regional Title One of the most successful track squads produced by Charlotte was turned out by Coach Gobel this year. The Orioles opened their season at the Hastings relays, in which they placed second to Western State high school of Kalamazoo. The following week, the Orange and Black met Eaton Rapids on the local track and emerged the victor by a score of 78-26. Char- lotte collected ten of the twelve firsts. The following Wednesday. May 4. Beldiug and Ionia came to Charlotte for a triangular meet. Again the Ori- oles were victorious. In this meet, both Cheney, and Henry of Belding ran the low hurdles faster than the state record. Charlotte scored 61 points to 49 for Belding and 21 for Ionia. The Charlotte-Hastings dual meet was on the local track. Hastings gave the Orange and Black tough competi- tion. but were unable to stop the team’s final drive w'hich gave the Orioles a 58 to 46 win. Charlotte finished the dual meet sea- son by routing the Olivet college fresh- mei 64 3 5 to 39 2 5 and remained undefeated in dual competition. On May 21. the Orioles entered the Saginaw Valley regional track meet and brought home the trophy along with twenty-two medals. In winning the meet, Charlotte quali- fied seven men for the state track meet at East Lansing May 28. Those who entered were Max Tullis. Gail Cheney. William Reefman. Murray Chandler. Kenneth Bruce. James Tracey, and Dorr Love. The team entered the conference track meet at East Lansing to defend their title. Mason was the only new team to enter the meet. feated Vermontville and Springport eked out a victory over Bellevue. Hastings drew a bye for the first tournament game and defeated Char- lotte In the finals by the score of 23-19. In this game. Bessmer of Hastings lost his peg tooth in Murray Chandler’s arm. The trophy was presented after the game by Harlan McCall. In the finals the class ‘C” competition. Olivet beat a scrappy Springport five. Olivet took the lead from the start and were never headed. A trophy was also presented to them. O'uale fye-atlieAA. GAIL CHENEY—Starting in his sophomore year, Gail went out for foot- ball. basketball, and track. He has now earned two letters in football, two in basketball, and three in track. He was elected honorary captain of the track team last year and of the foot- ball team this year. CARL GORDON—Carl has also been out for football for three years, as well as baseball. He has to his credit two letters in football and three in base- ball. His teammates have honored him by choosing him captain of the baseball team. VERN REYNOLDS—Vern’s major sport is baseball, from which he has four letters. His pitching has been a great help to the team. He also has two letters from football. WILLIAM REEFMAN—They called him “Cunningham’’ until he started to run the 440 yard dash. Willie’s” first two years on the track team were spent running the mile. This year he changed over to a quarter miler and has done fairly well for himself. He has one letter in football, and three in track. JIMMY SHAFFER—Jimmy has spent three years on the football team trying to reduce. Two of these years he played left tackle on the varsity. VAUGHN ROGERS—Vaughn show- ed his ability as a clever ball handler on the basketball team by playing for- ward and guard for two years. He also played on the baseball team last year. ED MOREY—Aggressiveness on the part of our “Mayor” won him the posi- tion of guard on the football team. Ed found time to play football aside from his job. JUNIOR GRIER—Junior won his first letter as manager of the basket- ball team. He came out for track this spring and turned out to be one of C. H. S.’s best half milers. CLARE THARP- Fritz” won him- self a place on the track team by run- ning the half mile. His track letter is his first letter. DALE BRYAN—Although Dale was quite small, he proved himself to be an athlete. Last year he ran the half mile, but switched over to the mile this year He has two track letters to his credit. (And to think, he wanted to be manager of the track team.) JACK GARLINGHOUSE—Jack won his first letter as a member of this year’s basketball team. He also spent two years on the second team as well as going out for football in his sopho- more year. HOLLAND WEAVER—“Patience is its own reward . Holland spent four long years on the football team and finally elevated himself to the first team. Rolland also spent some time on the basketball team. Juniors Compose Golf Team for 1938 Season This year’s team was composed of juniors. Bob Ladd played number two man in the first couple of matches but was elevated to the top spot when he was low man in the first two matches. Lawrence Tiegler played number four man mostly. Dave Elies and Bob Spice switched off and on between number two and three positions. Through the co-operation of the school board and the Charlotte Coun- try club, high school students were allowed to use the course free of charge. page seventeen

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The CHORHIflfl A Freshman' Innocence When a speaker at one of the year's assemblies was partially through with bis speech he paused and asked. Is there any one who would like to ask any questions? gteinman's little brother than chir- ruped. Please sir, how soon Is the band going to play? Caller: Is your daughter an eques- trian V' Proud Mother: Hither that or vale- dictorian. These class officers are so confusing, don't you know. Mr. Rohlfs: “Why are you limping so. Cleland? Wilmore: Oh. I sat down on the spur of the moment. Point of View I led my class In Greek for three successive years. That's fine, but wouldn't you much rather have carried the ball sixty- live yards for a touchdown just once? A Freshman's Prayer Oh. would some power the giftie give us. To see the sophs before they see us. Peroxide? Kelly: My hair will always be red until I dye. English teacher: Fred, you may give us a sentence in which the word 'notwithstanding' is correctly used. Van Vleck: “The man wore out his pants, but not with standing. Dykhouse: Is this your father's signature? Tharp: As near as I could get it.” Honesty Teacher: James, have you whis- pered today? James: Yes. ma’am, wunst. Teacher: Harold, should James have said ‘wunst’? Harold: “No. ma'am, he should have said twist.” Innocence As we were passing down the street the other day. we noticed two freshies leaving a store. O-o-o-o, said Beechler. didja see •he moneygrinder in the store?’’ Aw. said W Id rig, “ya make me sick. That ain't a moneygrinder. That's a crash radisher. How many subjects are you carry- ing? Well. I'm carrying one and dragging three. Farmer: Well, did you milk be- fore? Jr. Grier: (Applying for a job on a farm) Not exactly, but I’ve had a good deal of practice with a fountain pen. Asked of Willie Wilcox: What course do you expect to graduate in? Willie: Oh. in course of time. jcees Mr. Nielsen: (as Sid enters the house What time is it? Sid: “Just one o’clock. His dad: (as clock strikes three) Dear me. how that clock stutters. A Lesson Taylor: Name 3 kinds of nuts. Lynn Fowier: Doughnuts, peanuts and forget-me-nut8. Scott: Who called the tuba player a darn fool?” Rig Sterling: Who called the darn tool a tuba player?” Hairl! Hair! 11 Freddy A. Youngs: “You must have an awful time eating soup with that mustache on your lip. Mr. Hynes: Yes, it’s quite a strain.” An Ode Tell me not in accents languid Charhian work is but a dream: Or the “Ed can have a slumber Reading copy by the ream. No. it's real and it is earnest Keeping peace and unity: All the crabbers and the knockers Are opposed to harmony. Let us read this then with mercy Passing on the unmeant slam. And on that what you like mostly Have a heart, and on it cram. Dad Angel, to Donn (Politeness) Dol- son: No. we would scarcely consider it good form in introductions to say. Oh. never mind, that's all right.’ when a young lady says she’s glad to meet you. We’ll have to rehearse that. said Cheney as the coffin fell out of the car. Lady, to new clerk: Have you Umb's Tales? New clerk: “No. ma'am, this is a book store, not a meat market. Truth Cowan: How did you like the ex- j am?” Rosemary Parkhurst: Oh I was stuck on it. Question: When is a joke not a joke?” Answer: “Usually. Bob Davis in typing class: Miss Colburn, will you come here and show me how to hold my hands? Mr. Koch, to Mr. Anderson, discuss- ing scientific kissing: A kiss is the only really two-faced action under the sun. Mr. Anderson: Or the moon either. Miss Glllam: “This dance floor certainly is slippery. Fisher: It isn't the dance floor. I just had my shoes shined. Mountain guide: Be careful not to fall here. It's dangerous. But if you do fall, remember to look to the left. You get a wonderful view on that side. Cause Son Chandler: Have you noticed that funny smell in the library? Bob Baker: “Oh. that’s just the dead silence they keep there.” Billy Watson: Our history teacher talks to herself. Does yours? Jerry Sherman: Yes. but she doesn't know it. She thinks we're listening.” Mr. McCall received an excuse for Lamoreaux's absence which read: Mr. McCall: Please excuse Gordon for tardi- ness as he fell in the mud. Hoping you will do the same. I remain Sincerely. Mrs. Lamoreaux. A Complaint Mrs. Wildern has no right to teach. She doesn’t understand the subject and can’t explain. Besides, she didn’t give me an “A . Bob Ladd: “Will you have pie. Jack?” Mate “Is It compulsory?” Flash: “No. raspberry. Litty Anne Fernsler. in occupations class: Passengers are higher class matter than freight. B. Huber: “Is the Dramatics club going to see that play “The Minister Goes To Town? Miss Wells: Do you mean “The Bishop Misbehaves?” The Fate Of Nash A jolly young chemistry tough While mixing a compound of stuff. Dropped a match in a vial. And after a while They found his front teeth and a cuff. Charhian Staff: Why is it that you never laugh at our jokes?” Someone: I always try to respect old age.” Gordy Cheney, overheard talking to Twig: And then we charged the enemy and the captain says ‘Shoot at Will’, and I shouted ‘Which one is he?’ And then, horrors, they sent i me to the Jr. high room.” Mr. Noggle: “Why this outburst of laughter”? Marple: I was laughing up my sleeve and it had a hole in it. Absent (Minded) Mrs. Kiplinger: “Will the-ah-er- persons absent please speak to me about it directly after this class? Clara Root drew a picture of a hen so lifelike in art class once that when she threw it in the waste basket it laid there. Austin: Can paper produce as much heat as wood? Fulton: I should say so. The last report card I took home kept the fam- ily hot for a week. Definition A symphony orchestra is something your sister has on the radio when you want to listen to the Hit Parade. Teacher: “Give the principal parts of the verb “to skate.” Jim Spaniola: Skato. slipere. fallo, bumpus.” Freshman Yell Da-da-da-da MILK! MILK! MILK! Hubby: “I miss the old cuspidor since its gone. Wifey: You missed it before— that’s why It's gone.” Cat “It must be three years since I saw you last. I hardly knew you—you have aged so.” “Really! Well. I wouldn’t have known you except for that dress. Tolling The Bell Bell hop (after guest has rung for ten minues): Did you ring, sir? Mead: 1 should say not. I was toll- ing; I thought you were dead. Love, the Physics Class Mazda, darling, be mine. Incan- descent One! Watts life without you? Ohm is not ohm without the light of your presence. My heart is a trans- former that steps up at every thought of you. I would lay my head along- side your switch: the touch of your hand is like a live wire. Marry me, and let us have a little meter in our home. An Unpublished Slogan A soap manufacturing company ad- vertised a contest for slogans. They also made perfume. Here is a slogan that came in which they could not use. It read: “If you don’t use our per- fume. for Heaven’s sake, use our soap!” I want to buy a dime’s worth of dog meat. Butcher: “Alright, will you have it wrapped up or just eat it here?” Mrs. Kiplinger: Man sprang from monkey. Voice aside: Some one forgot to spring. Dawn Quirk to Ted Packard who was looking at her: What are you looking at?” Packard (absent mindedly as usual): Oh nothing. Bryan, after the General Motors assembly: Speaking of electricity makes me think- - -” Lorene: Another miracle of elec- tricity.” page nineteen CHARLOTTE PUBLIC LIBRARY Charlotte Mrch. o tS313