Central Manual Training High School - Record Yearbook (Philadelphia, PA)

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1. N Upon the bulletin board I saw the names of several new arrivals and their reasons for com- ing :-Thoumsin, a poor man, was blamed for being a poor manager, and consequently his com- ing, Albert, a rich man, was accused of being dishonest, therefore his visit, Cornwell was in poli- tics, and therefore considered a grafter, while Barratt who kept out of politics was forced upon the devil because he was considered an undesirable citizen. Daniel, a steady church-goer, came be- cause he was called a hypocrite, Harway, who stayed away from church, was judged to be a sinner and was put on the same train, Pyne, who gave money for foreign missions, was accused of doing so for show, while Sepley, who did not contribute was considered a tight-wad. My companion then took me back to Philly. I Here I saw Admiral MacDonald in charge of a tug-boat and Rear Admiral Fiske, in charge of a mud-scow-other members of the crew I recognized as Fisher, Gouldner, lleisler and Harlan. Walking along Chestnut Street, I noticed that all the young ladies in the crowd seemed greatly excited, the reason soon became evident however, Bonsal, Mullen, Radford and Charlton were taking their daily promenade. The air became close now, so I took a walk along the Boulevard. Here I saw a large, magni- licent building, which I knew by its looks, must stand for all that is high and noble. Upon in- quiry, I learned that this was the new Central Manual Training High School. And it came to pass, that at the twelfth hour, there was much noise and clanging of sym- bols, and from the bystairs and highstairs there poured forth great multitudes. So was I swept along until I found myself in a large room, which is called in the language of the Dubs, the basement, and there was in the corner of this place, a thing of abomination, called the lunch counter, where they of purple and fine linen did eat. . I had need of having my emptiness filled, and tried to approach the place, yet could not, for the inhabitants of the house of Sayre did push and kick and tight like animals in the arena, and strange sounds filled the air, which I recognized, and which in the language of the Dubs soundeth 87 .

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Upon our arrival in the Warmer Regions, l was surprised to see among Charonfs crew, Al. jordan, George Duval and James Brown of the Manual '08 crew. But Charon was not free from competition, for Clement Swift had started a cattle boat line and was carrying people across ,at re- duced rates. In one corner I saw Robert Boyd. Criswell, Kite and Wyatt, the ofiicers of the Red-Headed League, who kept the room lighted by the radiation from their hair. Hearing a strangely familiar noise which reminded me of Mr. Astley's room in Manual, I walked into the next room and saw the Knocker'sAnvil Chorusf' composed of Russell Boyd, Craine, Bullock and Fendrich. In the next room the heat was terrific. I saw many steel tubes along the walls, which re- minded me of so many steam pipes. Here I espied Henry Waples, the second hand architect, who had designed the room, Upon questioning him he pointed to Ellwood Burrows, Bussinger, C. Ellis, and McGrorty, who were talking into these tubes, and told me that these four kept all the other rooms warm with their hot air. Reading a newspaper, I learned that Albert Hansen had started a revolution and was expected to succeed the Old Man himself as master of the realm, He had been spirited away by the Stroller bunch, however, and when I saw him last, he was tied to a post, while around him danced Ewing, Furstenau, and Kellar, who were pelting him with cabbage, potatoes. etc. This reminded me of the David Garrick play and dance. In the Poet's Corner, I saw Pete Young, A. Davis and Kahn. Driving the imperial water wagon I saw Raymond Nye and Walt. Young. Beck and Chickering in order to utilize their enormous growths of hair were forced to act as shade trees. In a room all by himself, I saw Sidney Williams. All over the walls I read, I, I, I, Me, Myself, and I did this and other equally modest statements. L 86

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somewhat like- Beans, Milly, beans, cheese cake, Doc! Pie! Pie! Two pretzels, go whan, that's my change, what the h-l d'yer think yer doin'? etc. And now I became weary and was about to leave, when lo, stillness came on the house, those who were casting their bread and pie at one another, did become as lambs 5 and there went up a cry from all. ' Cheese it, Billy. A man of much beard and little hair, the littleness thereof being hid by a little cap of black, did pass through the place, casting many suspicious glances at those therein. I became afraid and knew not what to do, fearing that he of the cap did wish to do me evil. Therefore I hid myself in a closet -called a locker, but no sooner had I done so, when I heard a cry of locker thief, and the multi- tude sprang upon me, tearing my raiment and pulling my hair. But then did I bring forth that which I had received at the place of the lunch counter. And the multitude dispersed, it being a thing of abomination, known as a cheese sandwich. Thus did I leave the building, and climbing into the waiting airship, directed my guide to ascend. But the shock of seeing a new Central Manual was too much for me, and I fainted, pitch- ing headlong from my lofty position. I fell right toward an old, greystone building, which, from the many holes in the roof, I took to be the old school a.t Seventeenth and Wood. Crash! right through the roof and with a great bump, I struck the floor and-woke up. I found myself in the chemistry lab, where the fellows informed me that while, performing an experiment with ether I had inhaled too much of the vapor and fell asleep, awaking only when I fell from my stool. Now Ladies and Gentlemen, the future of some of the fellows I have revealed, some of my classmates I have missed. I may have been mistaken in my judgments, for who can tell. 88