Central Manual Training High School - Record Yearbook (Philadelphia, PA)

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which I could not understand. As he stopped I was surprised to see Henszey, but his partner, whom I recognized as George Campuzano, continued-don't turn away, young man, you feller with the green necktie, we all see that the young lady on your arm is a-dyin' fer to see the hippo, faint hearts never won a wimmin,-there you are, sir,-go-and be happy. Among those taken in by this combination were Lawson, Judah and Leslie. Here also, I saw Wiesen, Ellershaw and Wells, the living skeletons. The trio had to sit in one chair, so as to cast a shadow and present a side view. I heard that originally there were four of these things, but P. Kelly, the fourth, while bathing, had neglected to insert the stopper and had slipped through the drain pipe. He was rescued by plumbers Perry and Pommer. Walking along Main Street, I came across Magee's Beer Garden. Here Shimp and Ryder were waiters, Swing was moving picture man Che secured tha.t position by moving in the class pic- turej, Olden played the piano and Philip Rosenfeld manipulated the violin and its agitator, while Sacks and Moses executed popular songs. ' I passed a grocery store kept by janowski and Jahu, and a moving picture parlor kept by McKee and McClellan, here I heard Sparks and Rambo in a musical duet. But when McPherson came on and related some of the jokes published in the Red and Black of 1909, I could stand it no longer, and left. . I saw Atherholt, captain of a salvation army corps 3 also Saunders and Waters, who had recently been baptized. As my companion was a member of the immaterial world, he had access to all the unseen king- doms, and he took me for a trip to heaven. Peeping in through the keyhole, I saw George Washington and Howard Bollinger. In the purgatory I saw Krewson, Wyllner, Birney and McKnightg from the troubled looks on their faces, I surmised that the doors to heaven would not be opened for a long time to come. We then took a trip to The Other Place. On the road I saw Louis Zislin and Goldenberg. who were refused admittance to heaven, and even the devil himself, was afraid to allow them to enter, for fear they would own the place in a month. 85

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Reeking oratory from the back of a large wagon, and as usual talking a lot but saying little, was Billy Alkus, who was running for the job of constable. On one side surrounded by a large crowd, I saw Al. Hoover, who was selling live gold rings, seven packages of writing paper and seventy cents worth of pens, pencils and penholders for the trifling sum of twenty-five cents. Dodging Al., I ran into R. Kelly and Fuller, who stood before the music pavilion crying, h'yar, get your violets, violets, ten cents a bunch. Across the road I saw Stiles and Snowden, hiring out ponies to children. They received their early education in ponies down at school, so I guess they made good. Escaping from this pair, I was run into and knocked down by a man who was hurrying by with a child on one arm and his coat upon the other. I looked up and recognized Dub Moore. Peeping into a tent where a lecture on woman suffrage was being given by Miss Herr, I saw Pickleweight Grandage and Always was a Dub Shetzman, each surrounded by seven or eight chil- dren. The leading men of the circus were Adams and Emory. When I last saw them they were leading the horses to the drinking trough. In the courtyard were two swarthy looking individuals, who were operating fwith the aid of a pea and several walnut shellsj what the simple and unsophisticated might call a game of chance. The proprietors of this shell game were Anthony Capriotti and Spencer Gowdy. Among their victims was Bill Crawford, the town sheriff. Strutting around a.nd making eyes at the girls I saw I-Iannam, Steutz and Singley, policemen. In tlie menagerie I saw Ziegler the 310,000 beautyg he now had to use paint and powder to keep up to his former reputation. I also ran across George Lafferty, the human refrigerator, who ate from morn until eve without a stop. I was attracted by a barker, crying before the animal tent-Here you are, ladies and gents, only a quarter to see the hippopotamus 5 hippo means money and potto means lots, and some more gab 84 I i ,iwwlumwllllilllil

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Upon our arrival in the Warmer Regions, l was surprised to see among Charonfs crew, Al. jordan, George Duval and James Brown of the Manual '08 crew. But Charon was not free from competition, for Clement Swift had started a cattle boat line and was carrying people across ,at re- duced rates. In one corner I saw Robert Boyd. Criswell, Kite and Wyatt, the ofiicers of the Red-Headed League, who kept the room lighted by the radiation from their hair. Hearing a strangely familiar noise which reminded me of Mr. Astley's room in Manual, I walked into the next room and saw the Knocker'sAnvil Chorusf' composed of Russell Boyd, Craine, Bullock and Fendrich. In the next room the heat was terrific. I saw many steel tubes along the walls, which re- minded me of so many steam pipes. Here I espied Henry Waples, the second hand architect, who had designed the room, Upon questioning him he pointed to Ellwood Burrows, Bussinger, C. Ellis, and McGrorty, who were talking into these tubes, and told me that these four kept all the other rooms warm with their hot air. Reading a newspaper, I learned that Albert Hansen had started a revolution and was expected to succeed the Old Man himself as master of the realm, He had been spirited away by the Stroller bunch, however, and when I saw him last, he was tied to a post, while around him danced Ewing, Furstenau, and Kellar, who were pelting him with cabbage, potatoes. etc. This reminded me of the David Garrick play and dance. In the Poet's Corner, I saw Pete Young, A. Davis and Kahn. Driving the imperial water wagon I saw Raymond Nye and Walt. Young. Beck and Chickering in order to utilize their enormous growths of hair were forced to act as shade trees. In a room all by himself, I saw Sidney Williams. All over the walls I read, I, I, I, Me, Myself, and I did this and other equally modest statements. L 86