Central High School - Centralian Yearbook (Kansas City, MO)

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POOR SOPHOMORES ALMANACK For the Year 1907. 25 Mark a Newby, ‘09. HE that drinks his ice-cream soda alone, let him get his Caesar alone. Don't judge of teachers’ wisdom by their wise appearance. Seniors talk much but say little. Tis not a holiday that’s kept by studying. Great sophomores may dare to venture more: little freshmen should keep near shore. In test, forewarn’d is forearmed. Drive the teachers; don't let the teachers drive you. For want of application the lesson is lost: for want of a lesson the grade is lost; for want of a grade the point is lost. The seniors hate wisdom—in others. Diligence is what has won the sophomores fame. Approve not of him who commends all you sav; he’ll ask for your originals next. A freshman is never so ridiculous by those qualities that are his own. as by those he affects of'the sophomores. It is better to take many injuries than to give one—except in basket ball. If what most seniors admire, they would despite. Twould look as if the seniors were growing wise. A lesson today is better than a promise of one to-morrow. The teachers should obey the wishes of the sophomores: the students should obey the teachers. Work ahead or you’ll find yourself working behind. Early to bed and early to rise, makes a litle freshman the sophomore size. Weighty questions ask for sophomore answers. Warning to seniors—He that takes a wife, takes care. He’s the best teacher that knows the worthlessness of most pupils. Absence is never without an excuse, but seldom a good one. It is ill-mannered to silence a freshman, and cruelty to lei him go on. The first mistake in English is beginning it. lie that masters his Math masters much. You may delay, but tests will not. Reader, farewell. All happiness attend thee. May each school year better and wiser find thee.

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THE, JUNIORS Helen Fowler, 08. (Merely a Brief, containing a few of the Reasons why the 24 Juniors should be venerated.) A. Seniors, Sophomores, Freshmen, Everybody, should venerate the present class of Juniors, for, I. The nature and condition of the Junior Class command veneration for, a. Their numbers are large. b. Their brains are superior. c. Their beauty is surpassing. d. Their talents are numerous. II. Those who advocate snubbing the Juniors are foolish, for, a. Snubbing is a weapon used only by snobs. b. Snubbing has no sting for persons of self-respect. c. Snubbing casts no reflection on the object. d. Through the ordeals of Freshmen and Sophomore years, snubbing has proved unsuccessful with this class. III. The temper and character of the Juniors require ven- eration, for, а. A love of homage is their predominant trait, for, 1. They are the true inheritors of the wisdom of Solomon. 2. They are a self-governing body. 3. In religion, they are broadly tolerant. 4. But one year lies between them and the goal of their ambitions. 5. They are well-informed, especially concerning their own worth. б. They are remote from the verdancy of the Freshman. IV. Any struggle against venerating the Juniors would shake all fixed principles of school life, for, 1. Juniors have always been looked up to. 2. This particular class has been regarded as phenomenal ever since its arrival at Central. 3. By refusing to do homage to the present Juniors, Fresh- men. and Sophomores lessen their own chances for homage when they shall have reached the enviable state of being Juniors. V. Of the only three ways of dealing with the Juniors, you must adopt the third, for, a. The first way (to remove the causes of the Juniors' love of homage) is impossible, for, 1. You cannot decrease their numbers by flunking them. for, a. Their brilliance and attainments are too great. b. Their determination to succeed is too positive. 2. You cannot deprive them of their inalienable gifts of brains, beauty, and talents. 3. You cannot alter their temper and character for, a. You cannot persuade them that they are not as wise as Solomon. b. You cannot make them narrow-minded. c. You cannot lower the self-esteem. d. You cannot deprive them of their powers of self-gov- erning. e You cannot lengthen the time which lies between them them and glory, f. You cannot turn back time in its flight. B. The second way (to prosecute this spirit as egotistical) is impossible, for, 1. There is no method for convincing a body of its ego- tism. 2. Such a course might teach them that self-confidence is not conducive to success. 3. The school cannot be a just judge in its own cause. 4. This plan has proved unsuccessful in former years. C The third way (to comply with the spirit of the Junior Class, to applaud its courage, to admit its justice, to exult in the promise it gives of future achievement— in a word, to venerate the junior Class.) This method you, Freshmen, Sophomores, Seniors, and Faculty, must therefore, adopt.

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JULIUS CAESAR (Corrupted Version) Clarence Mooney, ’10. 26 cr ro.rReiHY-1 ACT II. Scene i. Curtain rises, revealing an elaborately furnished sleeping apartment of ancient Roman type, decorated with blue and white ribbons and pennants. Several much unused school-scrolls lie scattered carelessly about. Enter Sophomore, Junior, and Senior, the latter two disguised. They nervously adjust their togas and glance about apprehensively while Sophomore locks the sliding-doors and peers under the couch. Soph. Now. friends, all is secure: we may without Least apprehension talk on that for which We meet together here- But first, I pray, Be seated. lThcV s,t Jr. You were best to make more sure. Sr. Go to, thou coward! What's to fear? jr An you Would work to thwart us, nothing; much, since you Try to assist. Soph. Comrads. it is not meet That we should wrangle thus among ourselves. For we all three must needs take common cause ’Gainst Freshman, else be lost. Thou know’st full well He hath this soon progressed so marvelous much That even now—'tis certain true—must we Perforce concede he is our better far. I had as lief not be as live to be In awe of such a thing as this Freshman. I was born free as Freshman; so were you; Wc three have fed as well, and we can all Enjoy the teacher's scolds as well as lie: For once, upon a hot, depressing day. The troubled teacher chafing with his class, Freshman said to me, “Dar'st thou, softly, now To throw with me a sponge at teacher's head?” Upon his word, as frightened as I was, I had to take him up. I bade his throw. The teacher roar'd, and we did laugh at him Will lusty voices. Then he questioned me; But I. for motives good, knew wholly naught Of this embarrassment, lie next inquired About it through this Freshman, and the ass. In answer, uttered only truth; but yet He said not all he could, omitting that Which I had done. lie might as well have told The whole and spared some agony for me. For, after his fool doing. I was made To own part in the deed. And this man Is now become a god, and Soph’morc is A wretched creature and must bend his body. If Freshman carelessly but nod on him. Again! There was a time—this only once— He had no lesson, and he was in doubt When that the teacher bid him to recite. Then I did prompt, as we are wont to do. II is head he shaked; 'tis true, hi head he shaked; His countenance did with colour flush deep red. And that same eye whose bend doth awe the school Did grow in lustre; I did hear him say: “Think you, sirrah. I have no honor nor No self-esteem?” Yc gods, it doth amaze me A man of such an honest temper should So get the start of this majestic school And bear the palm alone. It doth astound! Sr. Y-e-e-s, in faith. Our Freshman has a good and honest look;