Central High School - Centralian Yearbook (Kansas City, MO)

Page 19 text:

OFFICERS OF THE SOPHOMORES. Miss Bolena Saunders, President. Mr. Will Singleton, Vice-President. Miss Helen Gentry, Secretary. Mr. Edward Dunlap, Treasurer. Mr. Christopher Lawler, Sergeant-at-Arms. —i»-- FRESHMAN CLASS-Officers. President, Mr. Ewing Cole. Vice-President, Miss Anna Hamilton. Secretary, Miss Mary Neal. Treasurer, Miss Mabel Allen. Critic, Miss Mabel Thornton. Sergeants-at-Arms, Miss Ailee Stevens, Mr. Ed Lockridge.

Page 18 text:

Cbe 3un'ors- The task of a historian is under no circumstances an easy one. It is then with particular hesitancy that we enter upon the history of the unsurpassed, unrivaled Class of 1901. Frcm the very first this class has been recogonized to be the eighth wonder of the world. On the day of its first enrollment Mr. White was taken with an epeleptic fit, Miss Archer was overcome with histerics and Prof. Coll—we have it on the authority of the present senior class—was heard to groan that night in his sleep. These deep and portentous omens have been bom out by the unusual success of the class. Among our successes are the facts that we are neither seniors nor sophomores, that we possess neither an unshaven Field nor a kingly Morrow. The first year of our existence has an unparalled record in the history of the school. Grim professors and staid school marms opened their eyes in amasement at our brilliancy. So far did we surpass the piteous brain bursting efforts of sophomores to be bright that it was predicted we would graduate before they did. This prophecy might have proved true if it had not been for trickery on the part of the class of 1900. These inhuman monsters one night waylaid and by skillful surgical process took out all our brains thus leaving us to begin again in knowledge’s thorny path. -18-

Page 20 text:

Sophomores Pen cannot describe, tongue cannot tell of the merits of this splendid organization of not too wise fools and not too foolish wisemen. From our first entrance we displayed all the modesty that could be expected from a class so grieved at the blatant boastfulness of its predecessor. In fact we were a very model of staid demeanor. We never were knowe to recite except in the privacy of a two o’clock audience. We never spoke of Mr. Coll in a less proper term than His Satanic Majesty, and we never blew our nose without permission from Mr. White. As the first year of our existance drew to a close we began to think of our election of officers. The majority of the class thought that Parson Pugsley would made the best leader. Deacon Morrow objected and was immediately churched. Sister Brent was chosen vice president and Brother Singleton was chosen treasurer. When we started-into school this year it was with the greatest pain that we looked upon our successors- But with the greatest of fortitude. Wetook up the heavy burden of playing example to these benighted freshmen. As great as may have been the responsibiiities of mourning the delinquencies of the Juniors, that of instructing the Freshmen has been no less trying. It would have discouraged a less determined band, to teach the Freshman not to cry during Mr. White’s weekly Friday invocation and not to bring to school more than two dolls a day. It is with mingled feelings of joy and sadness that we look back over our past efforts: joy that we have accomplished so much toward the betterment of the Freshman class in particular; sadness that after all our efforts no more than 10 per cent of the Freshmen class seem probably to escape the penitentiary or the asylum for the weak minded. It is alone for the infinite patience and for bearauce that we have displaped in the last two years that we hope to get inside the pearly gates. Amen. -‘JO-